Mom came home to find me crying on the floor surrounded by my hair, the hair the hair that was left appearing to be rudimentarly placed in between the bald spots as if done by a small child.Mom just cradeled me repeatedly uttering the phrase 'Its Fine', on I'd heard a lot in the past few weeks. I knew damned well it wouldn't as I was certain mom did. It wasn't fine, none of it was.
My lack of friends. The fact I would likely fail school. The disease that wouldn't kill me but would try hard. It wasn't Fine. It wasn't Okay. None of it.
That didn't change the fact my mom was hugging me and kissing my forehead, before leading me to the bathroom and shaving off the rest again kissing my forehead.
"Go back to sleep Sweetie, it's fine."

---

I didn't go back to school for a few weeks, mom just picked up all the work for me. I went to Chemo, being told I'd be there for a few more months at least but also that the Cancer seemed to be worse than they thought, that I might need to drop out or have surgery or any number of different things done to me. Pricking and prodding and all of the nonsense that made me want to sob and made me lose my breath.
I didn't see mikey or Frank or Gerard either, they would knock but I couldn't stand to rise from the couch and would wait till they left.
Finally I decided to let them in. I swung open the door to find them laughing and joking. When they saw me there mouths went slightly slackjawed and Frank made as if to touch my head but Gerard swatted it away.
"Hey kiddo" Gerard said smiling and allowing himself and Mikey and Frank inside "I brought presents" he tossed me a bag full of candy and DVDs and I saw a jagged scar running all along his wrist. I felt near tears greatfull towards them and happy to have human contact, as moms work schedule didn't seem to fluctuate no matter how I'll I was.
" Hey hun" Mikey said kissing my cheek and pulling me into a hug. As he pulled away he grabbed tight unto my hand as I thought maybe it would be ok.

Notes

Ok thanks for reading I hope you enjoyed please tell me what you thought and as always I'll post more tonight or tomorrow.