“Do actions agree with words? There's your measure of reliability. Never confine yourself to the words.” – Frank Herbert

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I let out a heavy breath and pulled the covers up so that my face was covered in darkness as my mother slammed the door close behind her.

“Frank?” Gerard’s hushed voice filled the silence.

“Yes Gerard?”

“Can I come out now? It’s getting stuffy in here.”

“Not until my parents have left for work, which won’t be long, you can open the door a tiny bit if you need air.”

I pulled the blanket away from my eyes to see the wardrobe door open very slightly; just enough for Gerard to get some air but not enough to rouse suspicion from my mother. I heard my mothers’ voice from downstairs as she chatted with, presumably, the office lady from school about my absence. I pulled the duvet over my head once again trying to think of just what I was going to do with the handsome young man hidden in my wardrobe.

My fingers instantly clenched on the duvet. Handsome, I just called a teenage boy that I hardly knew, handsome. I would be lying to myself if I tried to deny that his small, rosy, cupids bow lips weren't completely enrapturing along with his petite upturned nose that was far too adorable. He was effeminate but upheld his masculinity, small and airy but chiselled and, well, handsome. A deadly combination for an idiot like myself who falls into the trap of love due to impulsiveness rather than common sense far too easily. Something told me that perhaps sweeping him off his feet and declaring my affections would probably send him into a panic attack and end very badly for the both of us. Then again, he was the one who pinned me to the ground with his hips only moments ago. Maybe Gerard had other intentions or maybe he was just so broken and desperate for affection he’d take anyone’s – even mine.

The clicking of my mothers’ heels returned to my ears as she entered my room. I felt the bed dip at my feet as she sat and waited for me to show my face. I peeked out from under the duvet and tried to look as exhausted and defeated as possible.

“Frank, sweetie, I called the school and sorted out your absentee. Your father and I are going to head off to work, you stay in bed and rest up, alright? I left some soup on the bench if you get hungry.” She spoke quietly, smiling at me pitifully.

I coughed and let out a raspy, “thanks mum,” before she kissed my forehead.

“Call me if you need anything, we’ll be home around five, bye sweetheart.” She stood from the bed and walked out the door closing it behind her.

I stayed still and silent until the sound of my parents’ car moved from the front of the house, to down the street then disappeared from earshot completely. I heard a small grunt and then a loud thud as Gerard’s body came tumbling out of the wardrobe. Clothes flew out after him and covered his slumped body that lay on the ground. I felt bad for a moment before bursting out into a fit of laughter. Gerard shook the clothes off his body and scowled at me as I continued to giggle uncontrollably.

“Not funny, that hurt,” he huffed crossing his arms over his chest.

“S-sorry, it-it’s just a l-little funny, you have t-to admit,” my words were broken between laughing and trying to recapture my breath.

A small smiled crept onto Gerard face showing off his tiny irregular teeth and soon he was laughing alongside me. His laugh was a total contrast to his voice, it was high and off pitch, but suited him perfectly. I halted my swooning when I felt a weight push the mattress down next to my body. Gerard sat and smiled intently at my duvet covered body, when suddenly his face dropped.

“You okay?” I asked pushing my body up to a sitting position.

“I thought you were gonna introduce me to your parents, not shove me in a wardrobe,” his voice was quiet and solemn. I thought for sure in a few moments I’d have another teary eyed Gerard, but alas not a single tear was shed.

I looked at his downcast face and realised he wasn’t upset, he was hurt. I rubbed my eyes with the palm of my hands before nervously picking away at my fingernails. This boy was an emotional and metal wreck, traumatised and desperate for any type of affection he could get. Not a needy desperate, more just a wanting to feel something desperate.

I pulled Gerard’s body close to mine encasing him in a light hug, “Gee, I’m sorry, but, I couldn’t tell my mum, not yet, I need to keep you hidden for a while, just until I can figure out what I’m going to tell her, you said yourself that no one can know what happened. I just - I don’t see why we can’t just get the cops on his ass?”

Gerard’s body stiffened and he pulled away, “No! No, you don’t understand. If I thought the police would be able to do anything I would have run away myself. He’s dangerous and unpredictable.”

“Gerard you keep telling me how dangerous he is, but I don’t understand what you mean? Like, does he have a gun? A machete? A fucking flame-thrower? Like what makes him so dangerous!?” my voice began to rise with frustration and I knew it was making Gerard nervous.
He kept inching away from me ever so slightly, and flinched when I moved. Did – did he think I was going to hit him?
I let out a breathy, “fuck,” before taking hold of Gerard’s shaky hand, “Gerard you listen to me, I am not going to hurt you like that asshole did, I know I can’t ask you to completely relax, you’re used to being hurt when people get angry, but I swear on it, I will not hurt you in any way. You can trust me.”

Gerard nodded and forced a small smile at me, “Now, tell me, what makes him so dangerous?”

Gerard took in a deep breath, “you know how you passed out in the forest? When you were holding the ring?”

I raised an eyebrow, “Uh yeah, but what’s that go to do wi-“

“Just let me finish before you ask questions. I did it. I made you, y’know, pass out.”

I let my mouth fall agape as I stared back at him, “what? That’s not even possible Ge-“

“He taught me how to do it. The ring serves as a distraction. I didn’t mean to make you pass out, I swear. I wasn’t paying attention and it just happened. I thought I killed you at first because you stopped breathing.”

I squinted my eyes shut, running my fingers through my hair. Just my fucking luck, not only was this guy psycho but he was a psycho with some form of mystical power thing. “So, you’re telling me, that you ‘magically’ made me pass out? And that this guy has some freaky magical abilities he uses against people thus making him dangerous and calling the cops futile?”

Gerard nodded, “basically.”

“Is-is that why he was able to make you, y’know uh,” I carefully tip-toed around blatantly calling it sexual assault, I knew that Gerard wasn’t ready to accept that that was what had happened, “– do stuff?”

Gerard turned his head away, “no, he never used it on me when it came to those things. He wanted to make sure I felt every second of it.”

“Why did he teach you how to do it then?” Gerard still didn’t look back at me as my queries continued.

“It’s more the ring than me, I don’t know what he did to the ring but it holds the majority of the power, I just utilise it, he only taught me how to make people pass out, in case someone tried to take me away. I tried fiddling with it to try and learn how to manipulate it. I can do little things, memory loss, telekinesis if I have too. But I never used it obviously on Him, he would find out and punish me.”

“I don’t understand how it works, like, do you have to chant or something? I don’t get it.”
Gerard swiveled a bit to make eye contact, “it’s a mental thing. Concentration and lots of it, there’s no chanting or summoning. It’s all in the mind.”

I scratched the back of my head nervously worried as to how Gerard would act upon hearing my words, “you wouldn’t, you know, use it on me would you?”

Gerard eyes widened, “No! Never! You said you’d never hurt me right?” I nodded. “Right, well I’ll never hurt you. I don’t class this as a gift Frank. I only used it when I desperately needed too. Except for last night, I –uh- it was hard to concentrate with you ogling my ring, I didn’t realise what I was doing until you fell over.”

“Gerard, it’s fine, I trust you and don’t worry about last night. We’ll forget about it yeah?”
Gerard smiled, “yeah.”

----X----

Gerard was sprawled out on the floor of my bedroom flicking through one of my comic books. He had been entranced by my collection, which was now messily piled around him, all morning. Our conversation earlier had involved far too many emotions for one day, and I needed something that would hopefully keep him preoccupied for a few hours.

I hadn't believed him when he stared me dead in the eyes and said “I’m not going to stop reading until I’ve finished them all, the brilliance cannot be interrupted!” Naturally I laughed and told him it would take hours and hours to read them all. And yet, here we were not 3 hours later, and he was reading the last page of the final one.

I heard the book hit the ground along with a long groan. I peeked over my laptop to see Gerard lying flat against the ground and the comic book situated underneath his head. After a few minutes of no movements and no various other noises emitting from his throat, I thought it best I at least check in with his sanity. I closed my laptop and shuffled forward on my stomach along the bed so my head hung over the edge.

“You alright down there?”

Another moan.

“I don’t speak in moans, what that a good moan, or a bad moan?”

Gerard lifted his head only so that he could turn it and look at me before letting it hit the ground again. I nearly didn’t hear him when he finally decided to speak.

“It’s over.”

“What’s over?”

“The comics. All of them, done, finished, complete.”

“Is that a problem? I can buy some more if you’d like?”

“It’s not that, I, I just don’t know what to do with myself right now. Like, I want to feel something, but it’s empty, but like not empty y’know? It’s like a longing almost.”

“Uh, I think I get it. Like when you finish a book and you kinda take a step back and just sit there completely dead pan trying to fathom what you just read and convince yourself that it really is over.”

“Yes! That’s it. What do I do now though?”

“Uhm, I don’t know, I usually just start a new book, but you don’t really have that option considering I have no more comics left. We could go have some lunch if you want, get your mind off it?”

Gerard nodded in reply. I got up of the bed and flattened out my crinkled jeans before lending a hand to Gerard who seemed to still be suffering from his post obsession-over-a-series syndrome. Another groan left his mouth as I pulled him up from the floor.

“My back hurts,” he mumbled as we headed toward the door.

“That does tend to happen when you spend three hours on the floor,” I grinned at him.

Gerard smiled and nudged me, “shut up.”

-X-

Gerard stood close and watched me intently as I hurried around the kitchen preparing the soup my mother had left me. He seemed so enthralled by every simple action. Even placing the two bowls in the microwave seemed to ignite a sense of intrigue within him. It was a little awkward to be stared a while cooking, but I guessed that Gerard hadn’t been in or around a kitchen when food was being prepared for quite a while.

I had my back turned stirring when Gerard spoke up, “you’re really good at this y’know.”

I continued stirring and turned a little to make eye contact, “what? Stirring?”

“No, cooking. It’s weird, but you seem really comfortable with your movements when you’re cooking.”

“It’s canned soup Gerard, all I had to do was pour it in a bowl, heat it and stir it. it’s a pretty basic process, I wouldn’t really classify it as cooking.”

“Do you cook a lot?”

“Uh, no, not really. I make the occasional salad, but again, that’s not really cooking.”

Gerard nodded and cast his eyes down to his hands. I could feel another painfully awkward silence encroaching, and decide even if it was cooking we were going to converse about it was better than nothing.

“Do you, uh, do you cook?” I asked sliding the steaming bowl across the counter to him.

He took hold of the bowl with both hands and stared at it momentarily, “thanks, it’s been a while since I’ve had a meal this big. And, I haven’t cooked in a while, my brother and I used to cook with my mum a lot.”

I saw the sadness immediately wash over his features as soon as his family was mentioned, “oh, Gerard I’m sorry-“

“No, no, don’t be. I thought I was over what happened; that I’d moved on. But I never really had anyone to talk too, so I guess talking about it rather than thinking about it, I don’t know, makes it more real, if that makes sense?”

“Yeah,” I stopped for a moment to watch him take a large sip of the soup, “it makes perfect sense.”

Gerard and I finished our soup in silence, all the while he avoided my gaze. I knew he was upset, and it was mainly my fault he was. But I had no idea how to help him. Talking wasn’t going to do anything except make it worse, but I felt guilty staying silent. I grazed my eyes over the kitchen hoping that some utensil would ignite my imagination and help me figure out what to do. My eyes stopped at the microwave and I mentally slapped myself for not thinking of it earlier. A movie, no one has to talk, we just need to sit in silence and distract ourselves with terrible acting and dodgy CGI. Perfect.

Gerard didn’t question me when I took hold of his wrist and practically dragged him up the stairs back into my room. Nor did he speak when I set up all the pillows against the bedhead and picked out The Amityville Horror from my DVD collection. I closed the curtains and flicked off the lights making the room seem substantially darker then what it would normally be in the early afternoon and hopped onto the bed. Gerard stood awkwardly and watched me as I shuffled around and hit the pillows trying to get comfy.

I smiled and patted the empty space next to me on the bed, “care to join me?”

Gerard slowly settled in next to me, relaxing into the pillows, “what are you watching?”

“Amityville Horror, it’s the best movie,” I grinned and hit the play button on the remote.

“Horror? Is it, uh, scary?”

“It’s alright, not really what I’d classify as scary. You’d have to get scared pretty easily to have it frighten you. Don’t worry, if you don’t wanna watch it just tell me and I’ll turn it off.”

I kept my eyes forward trying not to steal the occasional glance as Gerard’s small body that was curled up next me. I could feel his presence was much closer than when the movie had started, the only problem was I wasn’t sure if he had inched closer to me or I closer to him. Oftentimes I’d found myself subconsciously moving towards something I wanted; whether it be cookies that mum has specifically told me not to touch or the near irresistible boy beside me, past experience had taught me that eventually I’d moved so close resistance was no longer an option.

I’d forgotten completely about the movie playing and was slightly confused when a small squeak escaped Gerard’s lips. A moment later his face was buried in my shoulder small whimpers slipping from his throat. I looked up to see the poltergeist causing havoc within the house.
“Frank, Frankie can you please turn it off,” Gerard pleaded into my shoulder.
I picked up the remote and turned off the movie and television causing the room to fall into near complete darkness.

“It’s alright Gee, it’s off,” I cooed gently and let my fingers daintily slip through his hair.

He didn’t remove his face from my shoulder instead he scooted a little closer to me. Our legs were touching and his stomach brushed against my hip. I let my hand continue lazily through the onyx locks as I lowered my voice and lulled into his ear, “Gee, Gee it’s okay. The movies off, it’s alright.”

Gerard slowly brought his head up from my arm and looked around the room, thought due to the darkness there was little to nothing to see.
“See, told you, everything’s alright,” I smiled gently and remove my hand from his hair placing it just slightly above his waist, “you okay?”

Gerard moved a little but didn’t try to remove my hold on him, “yeah, I’m okay, sorry.”

“No, no don’t apologise. We, we can watch something else if you want?”

His head fell gently against my shoulder once again, “do you mind if we just sit here, it’s okay if you don’t, it’s just-“

“Gee, it’s fine, whatever you want to do, we’ll do.”

Gerard dipped his head a little and whispered “thanks Frankie,” before inching just a little bit closer.

Notes

hey guys! soooo I know it's not the most riveting of chapters, but relationships must be explored! plus I felt like a little frerard fluff was necessary. ;)
please do comment telling me what you like, what you don't etc. also subscribe and vote if you enjoy! and thank you so very much for reading!
sorry for any errors! x