ONE MONTH LATER

It had been a month since I first started school. I eventually healed from my ribs; they were bruised not broke. I had not stopped cutting, it just got worse; mostly because I got bullied every day. They decided that since I was new and most likely a weakling I was a better option than Frank. Ah speaking of Frank I saw him walk into the Art room and sir down next to me.

“Hey Frank,” I mumbled. We have been hanging out at school every day. We just haven’t been in my room since the first day of school. Ever since the first day of school I got withdrawn and didn’t want to draw attention to myself. I basically relapsed into my depressed state from when I first got taken away from my uncle.

“Gerard, you aright?” Frank asked me concerned. That was the nice thing about him, he always noticed when I was upset.

“Yeah, I’m fine.” He looked at me; I knew he didn’t believe me. Just then Mr. Wentz came in and sat down at his desk. He looked over to me and Frank and smiled. We both had been hanging out with every day during free period ever since he rescued me. We got to know him pretty well. He told us that we might one day get to meet Patrick.

“Okay class, y’know the project that you finished yesterday that you started last month? Well, it’s time to turn them in.” He told us. All of us got our pictures out of our portfolios, we had to draw someone in our family that meant was special to you. Since my family was such a fuck up, I decided to draw someone from my new foster family.

I drew Mikey.

He was the first one to show me kindness. He came to me when I was getting beat by Mr. Stomp, he may not be the nicest considering we don’t talk to each other, he still means a lot to me just for what he did. I walked up to Pete and handed in my picture, he smiled at me and took it. I walked back to my seat and took out my lyric book. I loved to write music. I had just started a new song. It was about; I’m actually not sure what it’s about.


A world that sends you reeling from decimated dreams
Your misery and hate will kill us all
So paint it black and take it back
Let’s shout it out loud and clear
Defiant to the end we hear the call

I hated it. It needs something more. I just did not know what that was.

“Whatcha workin on Gerard?” Frank asked from over my shoulder.

“Nothing,” I said quickly while snapping my notebook closed. Frank raised his eyebrow at me.

“Well anyway, while you were off in your own world, Pete gave us our new assignment.”

I raised my eyebrow at him. “And what would that be?”

“We have to draw our favorite band symbol. I have no idea what this as to do with anything but he said he just lets us draw.” Frank said with laughter in his voice. I loved when his voice was like that. It raised my heart and made me smile.

Over the last month I had realized something.

I was gay.

I was in love with Frank.

I just didn’t know if he felt the same way to me. I decided it was time to take things a step farther.

“Hey Frank,” I asked nervously. I was never good at these things. He grunted to signal he was listening. “Do you um…ugh…wanna come over today after school?”

He looked over to me with a small smile on his face. “I would love to.”

I sighed and smiled. I could not wait till the end of the day.

The bell rang for the end of the period. Frank and I walked past Pete’s deask, he called us back.

“Frank, Gerard I can’t talk during free period today. I have to go to a meeting.” Pete told us. We nodded in understanding and left the room. Now we had nothing to do during free period.


FREE PERIOD

I sat in my desk tapping my pencil. I hated this period. It only lasted 30 minutes. It was so we could “get out homework done”, but no one ever did. Frank wasn’t in this so I had no one to talk to. I just sat at my desk typing my pencil in a rhythm that I made up.

I looked at the clock. 3:15**. Only 15 more minutes until the end of the day. 15 more minutes till I could see Frank again, he had some class, I honestly did not know.

15 minutes later the bell rang. I jumped up from my seat and ran to my locker. I was almost there when Cobalt stuck his leg out and tripped me. I went falling, and my books went spewing everywhere. I just sighed, this had been happening every day.

“Oh I’m sorry, I didn’t see you there Gerard,” Cobalt laughed. He came up close to me. “I’m tired of seeing your face around. All I see is you taking up space. You honestly are a waste of space. I don’t understand why anyone would want you, you are nothing. Nothing.” He leaned into my ear. “I don’t blame your parents for beating you, you deserved it.” And with that he walked away. How did he know!? I had never told anyone. I had only told one person. It couldn’t be him….or could it?

I stood up and gathered my things together. No one helped me. Who would? I had tears in my eyes. I pushed them back. I would have time for the tears later. I rushed to my locker and got everything out. I ran out the door and on the bus. I forgot about Frank. I forgot he was coming over.

When the bus got to my stop, I rushed off ignoring the calls of Ray and Mikey. I did not want to talk to anyone. When I got inside I hurried into my room. I got my special box out and opened it. I stared at the metal. It was looking lovely. It was still sharp. I put it against my skin. The things Cobalt told me came back.

I don’t blame your parents for beating you, you deserved it.

I slashed the razor across my wrist.

You’re just a waste of space…

Another slash.

You are nothing.

A finale slash. I had tears streaming down my face. I was about to do one finale cut just for the pain when I heard a gasp.

“GERARD!” A voice shouted at me.

Notes

Enjoy :3