I'm Okay Now

**next day at school**
Honesty I don't get nervous or scared that often but right now that's all I'm feeling and it's all because of the date I had planned today. I have been on a couple of dates before but I never felt this way around any other girl. When I'm with Kate I could be myself and never have to worrie about a thing, she's the only person next to Mikey that can make me happy. Except now all I'm feeling is worry. What if she dose now like what i have in mind for tonight? What if she dosent feel the same feelings that I have towards her? What if where moving to fast? What if it rains? Even though she likes the rain, our date wouldn't be as enjoyable. So many bad things could happen and that's I'll I'm thinking about. My mind came back to me when I heard the first bell of school ring. Just make it past 8 hours I reminded myself. Then you can go home and try to survive the two hours after that.
***
The rest of the day continued normally and when the final bell of the school day ring I could hear my heart beat faster and faster each second that passed. Is this what they call a panic attack? Without much thought I grabbed my brown leather bag and ran out the door speeding by every student blocking my path, and made my way out the door.
I was the first one home thank god. That gives me more time to calm myself down and get ready for whatever is going to happen in the next 2 hours. I had only two hours to get ready and make myself presentable but how? Just then I heard the front door open and heard the sound of two teenagers walk in.
I was never good when it came too dressing up nice and right now I was out of options.
"Mikey I need your help!" I yelled in an almost panicking voice. It was a matter of seconds when He came to me as if he was a dog and I was his owner. before I knew it my little brother was searching threw my drawers looking for some nice matching clothes that would work for tonight.
"I'm actually panicking, like I never felt this way about a girl and now we are going on our first date" I told him, trying to control the tapping in my feet.
"dude calm down"
"how an I suppose to calm down! I just,.. Well I love her and I don't want to mess this up" he stopped what he was doing and stood up, where eye level when he grabbed both of my shoulders making sure he had my full attention before speaking.
"you need to clam down and be chill. She loves you too I can see it in her eyes whenever she looks at you. I only see that sparkle in her whenever she is around you. Just don't get nervous because this girl if a fucking mind reader and it might turn her off. Just act normal and show her you love her, make her believe what you two have is real. Just stay calm" I guess what he said really did calm me down because now I could feel my heart beat slow down and start returning to normal. Mikey was always good around the girls and I never really had much luck.
"thanks mikes" I said wail patting him on the shoulder as i took the clothes he handed me and walked into the bathroom. Here goes nothing.
**
I was staring at myself in the bathroom mirror checking myself over making sure everything was perfect. I was wearing dark black skinny jeans and a green day shirt that had the 'American idiot' album logo on it and a black jacket. To top that all off I applied a thin layer of eyeliner which wasn't that noticeable but I made a difference to me. I also wore a pair of grey converse that completed the outfit. Thank goodness for Mikey, I was going to wear a white dress shirt but he said it would look to 'teacherish' and that would have been horrible. No matter what I did I still wasn't pleased with the way I looked and the butterflies in my stomach didn't help. Did girls also feel like this before a date? Ugh what could be worse. I checked my watch and saw that it was 4:57 telling me I had three more minutes left to panic. Great. I quickly brushed my hair then lightly messed it up again and bit my tong trying to prevent the lump in throat
**
The two minutes I spent waiting at the door where the longest too minutes of my life. I checked down at my watch that read 4:59.47 but my attention was caught by the sound of light foot steps walking down the stairs. My heart skipped a beat and my jaw dropped to the ground when I looked up and saw the most beautiful girl in the whole world approach me, it was as if I was frozen in time staring at her beauty. Every time I look at her my heart rate would speed up but right now it seemed everything was different. I stayed there, unable to move, wail checking out her beautyI always knew how beautiful she was but tonight she was gorgeous. She straightened her hair and side parted her bangs to the left. Her brown hair was a lot longer then usuall and fell beside her black long sleeve leather jacket that coverd her white shirt. She was also wearing leather skinny jeans that matched her black x-high converse and red laces. Her whole outfit matched, her makeup, I honestly don't like it when ever she covers her pretty face with make up but tonight it was done perfectly. The smokey eye style went along with the leather perfectly and the red lipstick brought out the red laces on her shoes and made the black stand out even more. I don't even know how long I was staring at her perfection and honestly I couldn't care less.
"you look very Handsome tonight" she said blushing
"y-you" looks like I already failed on Mikey's advice: 'don't be nervous "you just looks so beautiful" I managed to say. I saw her cheeks turn bright red and I couldn't help but smile from ear to ear.
"ready to go beautiful?" I asked whail sticking out my elbow which she instantly took a hold of. She looked up at me smiling and gave me a nod. Out the door we went.
**
"so where are we going" she asked in a small excited voice 5 minutes into the car ride
"it's a surprise"
"you know I hate surprises, can't you just tell me"
"it's something that you like doing"
"fine. And that's because I trust you" the ride dident take more then 10 minutes and we arrived still having an hour left of sunshine before it sets.
I wanted to take her to the park on top of the mountains. There was this huge open area that had nothing but the greenest grass and flowers everywhere and I knew she would like it. But she would mostly love how you can see the city when you stand on the ledge. When i pulled up the car in the parking lot I looked over I noticed that she had a big smile on her face
"my mom took me here when I was twelve, just before she died and I haven't been here since." some tears started to build up in her eyes but she quickly pulled them back in just before any fell.
We walked along the paved path of the reservation and towards the park. Last time I been here was when my grandma took me and Mikey out for the day back when I was somewhere around 18 and that was the first time I found out about this place. I knew that I needed to share its beauty with someone but I never came across the right girl, now I finally did. The tempErature was perfect tonight, not to cold but a steady war. As we walked to the park we didn't say a word, but it wasn't an awkward silence at all, it was more beautiful then anything. Her arm never left mine as we walked side by side with the sun setting behind us.

Notes

4/19/14
hey guys! Sorry for the poorly written update. I must have written this chapter 4 times but I was never impressed with either one, so I decided to suck it up and post it.... So here you go! I hope it's not as bad as I see it, but if you have any suggestions let me know, I would love to hear it!
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