What Happens in High School

Max’s POV

Bob and his parents and sister were coming over for dinner tonight. I was a little nervous. I’d already met his sister and was sure that she and Andrew would get along well. I was certain his parents were nice people, after all they raised Bob to be a gentleman. It was me that I was worried about. I was afraid I’d make a bad impression on his parents. I’d never ‘met the parents’ before and I wasn’t exactly sure how to act. My mom told me to just be myself, but what if that wasn’t good enough. I loved Bob and didn’t want anything to get in the way of that.

I stood in front of my open closet after drying my wet hair from the shower. I didn’t know what I was going to wear but my mom had said that I should wear the blue dress my Aunt Laura got me. It was nice but just not really my style. I decided to wear it anyway, just because it wasn’t my favorite dress doesn’t mean I didn’t look good in it. Plus it wasn’t too short or slaggy looking.

I heard a knock at the door and went to go answer. I saw Bob standing there with his parents as he held onto his little sister’s hand. I thought that was just the cutest thing ever. “Hi Max.” Jessie said looking up at me.
I got down to Jessie’s height and said, “Hi Jessie, it’s nice to see you again.” As I said this Andrew came out from behind me. I took his hand and we introduced our siblings. “Andy this is Jessie, Bob’s sister.”

“And Jess this is Andy, Max’s brother.” The two shook hands and seemed to click pretty well. They ran off together down the hall to go play some game. Bob and I stood there a moment before I said, “Come on in.” I held the door open and stepped aside and they entered just as my parents came to meet us. I shook his parents hands and he the same with my parents.

“So, you’re Max. Bob has only told us good things about you.” I looked at Bob as his mother said this and smiled before turning back to her and answering, “Thank you. It’s lovely to meet you Mrs. Bryar.”

“Mother, father. This is Bob Bryar, he’s in the band with Ray and the boys.” My parents smiled as my father said, “It’s nice to finally meet you Bob. Max seems very smitten with you, and now I can see why, you seem like a very nice young man.” Bob grinned at this compliment before returning with, “Thank you sir.” There was a slight awkward pause until my mom said, “Hey Maxie, why don’t you take Bob upstairs and let the parents talk? We’ll call you down when dinner’s ready.” I nodded and led him upstairs without taking hold of his hand. It was probably a little early to be doing that in front of our parents.

We went up into my room. The last time he was here was after Jack had been suspended for being an ass; even though that wasn’t the official reason. This time my room was clean and free of art supplies. My room was neatly kept and clearly organized but I had little knickknacks and things in just about every open space. I sat down on my bed and motioned for Bob to join me. As he sat down next to me he offered, “You look really pretty.” I gave him a face and said, “Thank you. I hate this dress but my mom insisted I wear it.”

“Well I like it on you.” I looked down and blushed a little before meeting his eyes again with a smile. I brought a hand up to his face and said, “Well, what about you? No beard? No piercing?” He chuckled a little and brought his hand up to hold mine. He brought our hands in front of us and replied, “Yeah well, you know…” I could tell that he didn’t really know what to say but that was fine. I just smiled and laughed not expecting a more in depth explanation. I knew Bob shaved to make a good impression on my parents. He did it for me.

I sat there staring into his blue eyes and the whole world was shut out. Right then, it was just me and him. He leaned in to seize the opportunity, and I did the same. Our eyes closed and I could feel his slow breath on my lips.

We meet in the middle and he gently kissed me. He moved his hands up to my face and traced his fingers along my jawline. I felt my breathing starting to become quicker as we fell into a rhythm together. I had never really made out with someone before but I imagined that this was what it was. I felt shivers running down my spine at the very slightest touch. His hand found my knee and he rested it there for a moment before sliding up to the hem of my skirt. He pulled his lips from mine and leaned in to whisper in my ear, “What are you doing to me, Max?”

I didn’t know what Bob meant by this but his breathing was slightly heavy and I could feel his hand start to slide up my leg a little. This feeling of him being so close and touching me like this was scary and exciting at the same time. Before things got any further we heard Andy scream, “Maxie! Mommy wants you downstairs.” We quickly pulled away from each other to see our siblings standing in the door way. I wondered how much they’d seen. “Ooh, I’m telling mom!” Andrew taunted as we got up from the bed. “No you’re not.” I said simply as I passed him and ruffled his hair.

Just as we got downstairs the two little ones came running down, Andrew teasing, “Mom! Maxie kissed her boyfriend!”

“Yeah,” Jessie joined. “And Bobby kissed her back, on the mouth!” Bob and I both gave our siblings looks and they turned to each other and giggled together. We faced our parents again who didn’t seem to mind. If Bob and I were dating, this was bound to come up eventually. “Oh no,” Bob’s mom played along with them. “How tragic.” This lightened the mood enough to significantly decrease the awkwardness.

We all sat down at the table, my parents and I sitting at one side and Bob and his parents on the other with the two little kids at the edge giggling together. As we ate, our parents asked us questions about our interests, grades, and hobbies. Nothing Bob and I didn’t already know about each other.

I bragged to my parents about Bob’s amazing drumming skills and he did the same regarding my ‘talent’ on the French horn. It went back and forth like this for a while until we were excused from the table. Andrew and Jessie insisted that we ‘weren’t allowed to be alone together’ because we ‘couldn’t be trusted.’ We gave into our siblings’ game and stayed in the play room with them. The two of them colored and laughed with each other while Bob and I just sat and talked.

“You’re gonna grow it back right?” I asked as he gave me a confused look. “Your scruff.” I said touching his face. “I miss it already.” He laughed and nodded, “Yeah, I’ll get it back.”
“And your lip ring too, I liked it. It made this even better.” When our siblings weren’t looking I planted a gentle kiss on his lips, not even long enough for him to really register it. I wish it had lasted longer, if only the children weren’t around. He accepted the kiss nonetheless and smiled a silent reply.

At the end of the night, I said goodbye to his parents and he to mine. I really enjoyed meeting them and was happy about how the night went. My parents really liked Bob, I got along nicely with his folks and each set of parents seemed approving of each other. Not to mention Andy now had a new playmate.

Climbing into bed that night I was happier than ever. If I thought about it, I had a pretty great life. My best friend was my next door neighbor, I had family that loved me and I had the most incredible boyfriend on planet Earth. Looking at my scars, it kind of made me wonder why I’d ever cut in the first place.

…

As the weeks went on, Bob and I enjoyed every moment we spent together. I loved our relationship. We liked having each other around but we weren’t attached at the hip. We gave each other space and time to hang around other people. He had grown back his scruff and replaced his lip ring which I’d kind of been missing since he shaved for dinner with my parents. Now he was back to the Bob I’d always known.

Christmas and New Years were coming up soon, which also meant that so was Bob’s birthday. He and Frank were the only one’s of us who had birthdays on holidays. Frankie on Halloween, which suited his personality and Bob on New Year’s Eve. We threw Frank a small Halloween party during which we just ate candy and hung out while dressed as various superheroes, so we figured it was only appropriate to also hold a party for Bob’s birthday and to ring in the New Year.

Ray, Gerard and I were setting the plans. We’d have it at my house. I’d tell Bob that I just wanted to see him on his birthday but then we’d surprise him with everyone else. We’d count down the New Year together, all of us in each other’s company. I liked the idea of all of us being with each other when the New Year came in, that is if we could get Bob there without him knowing what was going on.

School was out for the holidays I didn’t expect to be seeing my friends until Bob’s party. Well, that is except for Ray whose family always had us over for Christmas Eve dinner. I guess it was a Portuguese thing. Frank and Bob were both going away to visit their families. That left just me, Ray, and the Way brothers. Bob had left a few days before Christmas and wouldn’t be back for another couple of days. I missed him and I couldn’t wait to see him when he came back.

On Christmas Eve I walked over to Ray’s house. The tradition was that I’d head over early with my mom and help Mrs. Toro cook then later as it came closer to dinner time I’d change into my ‘Christmas dress’ and Ray, Andrew, and I would have to sit through awkward holiday photos. It wasn’t so bad thought, after all, at least we suffered together.

I knocked on Ray’s door and was surprised to see his brother answer. “Lou!” I screamed as I ran to hug him. Lou was just as much my older brother as he was Ray’s at this point and I hadn’t seen him in almost two years. “Hey Max, Merry Christmas.” He said into my hair as I squeezed onto his shoulders. I stepped back and he took a look at me. “Well, you’ve certainly grown up nicely.” Lou had always been a friendly flirt. I pushed him a little and smiled at this. Ray came up and gave his brother a face obviously hearing what he’d just said. His expression lightened once he saw me. “Hey Max,” he said pulling me in for a hug. “Merry Christmas.”

“Merry Christmas, Ray.” I went with Ray up to his room to deposit my change of clothes, AKA the ugliest dress ever along with Andrew’s, get this, sweater vest. And Ray had to wear a matching one. The pictures were gonna be good this year.

We headed back downstairs and I helped Mrs. Toro and my mom get dinner ready, even though it was only three in the afternoon. The boys all went downstairs to play video games, including Andy who’d probably end up back in here with the girls sooner or later when he got frustrated playing with the big boys. This was probably safest though; that way the Toro boys wouldn’t burn down the house or corrupt Andrew with their violent video games.

After what seemed like, or rather actually was, hours of cooking later, I went upstairs to get changed. As I climbed up the steps I could hear Mrs. Toro call down to her sons, “Muchachos, se apagan los videojuegos y vienen de arriba. Ambos tienen que vestirse para las fotos.” I loved when Mrs. Toro spoke Spanish, even though I barely had any clue as to what she was saying half the time. Just as I cleared the top step I could hear them groan which made me laugh a little.

I grabbed my dress out of my bag and went into the bathroom to change. I held it up staring at its ruffles and pleats. I was surprised, and disappointed, that the dress even still fit me after four years. I slipped it over my head figuring there was no way to make it any less hideous. Then I saw the scissors. I positioned the blades up by the shoulder seem and started chopping. I cut off the ugly sleeves with the ruffles at the wrist leaving a simple green plaid tank dress with a white collar. It looked so much better, why hadn’t I don’t that sooner?
I walked out of the bathroom to see Lou tying Ray’s tie. “Hey that’s my job.” I fake complained as I saw them. They turned to me and the moment they saw me I could see the shock on their faces. Lou stared at me with that creepy grin of his before spitting out. “Well hello Maxine. You can still tie my tie.” Ew.

Ray punched his brother in the arm which broke his daze. “What the fuck?!” Lou protested as he turned to Ray. “Dude, she’s like your sister. Stop hitting on her, plus she has a boyfriend.” Lou’s face sunk a little with this, but I knew he was just joking. “Lucky guy.” He said winking at me.

“Okay, I’ll just leave you two for a minute. I’m gonna go get my sweater.” And with that I stepped past the brothers and grabbed my white sweater from Ray’s room. I slipped it over my shoulders and tugged the sleeves down to my wrists to cover my scars.

By the time I got downstairs Ray and Lou had managed to get their ties on properly and even got Andrew’s on. I laughed a little seeing all the boys in their matching red argyle sweater vests; Mrs. Toro had even gotten one for Lou. They looked miserable; got to love the holidays.

My mom and Mrs. Toro organized us all around the tree trying to get us into the perfect position, which ended up as follows: Me sitting on stool with Andy on my lap, Ray and Lou standing behind me with their hands stacked on either of my shoulders. We all plastered on our biggest holiday smiles in an effort to get picture time over with as soon as possible. This was probably the only time all year we cooperated this well with each other. But of course once Ray’s dad said, “Bien, hemos terminado,” you could hear our collective sigh of relief. That was some Spanish I did now and was always more than happy to hear. I got up picking Andrew up off my lap and walking with the boys to the table with our parents.

I sat down with Ray on my right and Andy on my left. We held hands and said grace. None of us were really religious but felt like if there was any time to do it, Christmas was it. We ate, we talked, we laughed, and we had a general good time. After dinner we opened presents. Ray got a staff paper note book from me to write music in and he gave me a new set of oil paints. We hugged and exchanged thank yous. They weren’t the grandest of gifts but they were meaningful which was way better anyway.

The adults stayed in the dining room to talk for a while, Lou and Andrew included. Ray and I went down into the basement to hang out for a while. Even thought I’d been over his house all day, I’d barely gotten a chance to see him. When we got down I shut the door in case we got too loud. I gently clicked it closed and turned to face Ray who held up a bottle. “No,” I said plainly. “That’s a bad idea.” Ray just smiled and said, “Come on, Max. It’s not that bad.”

I just gave him a skeptical look as he opened the cap and took a sip. He made a face as he swallowed the burning liquid, it was a little funny. He shook off the feeling and handed the bottle over to me but I didn’t take it. “No, it’s all yours.” With that he shrugged and took another sip.

Ray had only gotten drunk at Christmas one other time, two years ago when he found a half full bottle of wine under the cupboard. But this time was different, Ray definitely didn’t have wine in that bottle. I was never really a big drinker, I’d had a few beers in my day but hard liquor wasn’t really my thing. I could already start to see that Ray was getting tipsy. One more swig and it was official, he was drunk. He was still coherent but totally slurring his words and getting really tired looking. “Okay, that’s enough.” I said as I took the bottle from him and hid it.

“Alright Max, anything for my best friend in the whole wide world.” I couldn’t help but laugh a little at his drunkenness. He sat down on the couch pulling me with him. “You look so pretty tonight, you know that.” It was starting early I see. Whenever Ray got even kind of drunk he went crazy with the compliments and the flirting. “Yeah I know.” I answered jokingly, playing along with Ray’s game. “No like really, really pretty, even in that hideous dress.” We cracked up a little at the description of my outfit. “You should take it off,” he suddenly said in a breathy and slightly sultry tone. I stiffened at this. That was a new one.

“Ray?” I asked a little nervous. “How drunk are you?” I asked him as he looked up to me. “Not really.” I knew that had to be a lie. There was no way Ray was this vivacious with his flirting if he wasn’t drunk. I don’t know what he’d had in that bottle, but it must have been some pretty powerful stuff.

He reached a hand up to my face to tuck some hair behind my ear. “Okay Ray. I think you need to go sit down for a while. By yourself.” I said pushing his hand away. I went to stand up but Ray pulled back down on my wrist preventing me from leaving him. “You know, whenever I see your scars, it makes me really sad. A girl like you shouldn’t have to be upset. You don’t deserve that.” As nice as this little drunken pep talk was, I had no idea where it was coming from.

Suddenly Ray sat up straight, bringing his eyes to my level. “Do you love me, Max?”
“What? Of course, Ray you’re my best friend. Why wouldn’t I love you?” In the middle of my answer he started to shake his head. “No, no not like that. I mean do you love me?I love you.” This side of Ray was so new to me, drunk or sober. I didn’t know what to do and he was kind of scaring me. What did he mean he loved me?

Ray looked into my eyes and that’s when it hit me just how truly drunk he was. I could see the glassy look in his eyes and smell the alcohol on his breath even from the other side of the couch. Ray scooted over to close some distance between us and that’s when I could really smell the booze. “I love you, Max.” he said in a bit of a sing song voice.

“Yeah, I got that. Ray you’re really drunk. I’m gonna go get Lou. We won’t tell your parents.” Before I could get up though Ray crashed his lips to mine. I didn’t expect that at all. I was shocked when he did it and even more shocked to find myself kissing him back. I felt my eyes flutter closed losing myself for a moment. He brought his hands up to my face as I brought mine up to his chest feeling it rise and fall. He pressed harder on to my lips with a kind of urgency, like he’d been waiting years for this. He parted his lips causing me to do the same as he slid his tongue gently into my mouth. I could taste the alcohol making me remember why he was doing this in the first place. I felt one of his hands move from my face to the hem of my skirt and slide up to rest half way up my thigh. He started to trace along my leg making random shapes on my inner thigh with his thumb, but I didn’t push him away. Why didn’t I push him away?

This wasn’t the first time Ray and I had kissed. Back at the beginning of high school, a few weeks after the start of our freshman year, Ray and I were hanging out and talking when it happened. He started asking me questions like, “Have you ever kissed anyone?” I looked at him and simply replied, “Nope. You?” Ray shook his head, his curly hair bouncing around his face and answered, “Nope.” We sat for a moment and there was a slight awkward silence between us. I had wondered why Ray wanted to know but didn’t think much else of it. Well that is, until he spoke up again. “I kind of just want to do it, you know? Just to say I got it over with.”

I looked at Ray thinking of what he might be hinting at. I had always felt the same way but had never found anyone who would do just that, let me get it over with. I swallowed before tentatively responding, “Do you want to… you know, get it over with now?” Ray looked up but not really at me. He moved his nervous gaze around the room before asking, “Isn’t that weird?”

“Yeah, I guess. Sorry. Forget I said anything. I just thou-“

“Although,” he said suddenly. “It can’t be that bad, sharing my first kiss with my best friend and all.” We stayed looking at each other as if to assess the other’s readiness and willingness to actually do it. After a moment of neither of us saying anything he scooted a little closer to me. “Okay, you ready?” I nodded as we both closed our eyes. I felt him lean in and place his lips gently onto mine. Nothing really spectacular happened, it was just your average awkward first kiss with your best friend. He pulled away after a moment and I was the first to speak. “That wasn’t so bad.”

But now, I was shocked and surprised at what was happening and a million thoughts ran through my head at once until one caught my attention. “Bob!” I said pushing Ray away breaking the kiss and moving his hand off of my leg before he got too far. He looked back at me shocked. I don’t know what did it, but he seemed to sober up quick. “Oh my god, what did I just do?” Ray asked rhetorically. I just stared back at him not knowing exactly what to say. “Max, I am so sorry. I honestly don’t know where that came from.” He slightly slurred out making it sound like one long word.

“What...? Wh..? Why did you do that? Ray what were you talking about?” He looked panicked as he answered a little louder. “I don’t know! I…I just. You were sitting right there and I… just.” He stuttered out and paused for a moment letting us both think.

“Max, I really am sorry.” He pleaded.

“No, I know. I’m just still in shock. I mean you just kissed me, so…” He ran his hands through his curly hair as I awkwardly said this. We just sat there in silence for a few minutes. “What did you mean?” He dropped his hands and looked up to me. “What?” he asked genuinely confused. Did he really not remember?

“You know. What you said before…” He actually had no clue. “You said, you loved me.”


“Yeah Max, that’s nothing new. You’re practically my sister, of course I love you.” He just wasn’t getting it and I was getting impatient so I just spit it out. “No, Ray. You said the scars on my arm made you sad because a girl like me didn’t deserve to be upset then you asked me if I loved you and I said, ‘yes, as my best friend.’ But then you said that you loved me and asked me if I loved you the same way. Where did that come from?”

“Oh,” He looked down uneasily at his hands. Now I was getting annoyed. “Ray!” I said slightly angrily causing him to jump a little and look at me. “Okay! Okay,” he started and I listened. “But come on Max, how couldn’t I?” I couldn’t believe what I was hearing. “I tried to fight it which is part of why I pushed so hard for you and Bob to work out. I got over it, I promise. It was just the booze that pushed me over, I swear on my life Max. I wouldn’t lie to you.” I looked into his eyes to see he was being sincere.

Ray was my best friend and I’d hate for something as silly as a kiss to come between us. “Okay, just never again alright?” I let out a breath I didn’t even realize I’d been keeping in and Ray responded. “Totally, that was weird enough the first time.” We both laughed a little at this relieved that most of the tension in the room had dissipated.

“What am I gonna tell Bob?” I asked suddenly becoming serious. I had to let him know, he was my boyfriend and had the right. Ray quickly protested this thought. “Nothing, you tell him nothing.” I looked at Ray assessing this option. What Bob didn’t know wouldn’t hurt him. After all it was just a kiss, but then why was it such a big thing to keep from him? Ray was right though, it might be best to just keep it from Bob, at least until after his birthday.

“Okay,” I agreed with Ray. “I won’t mention it to him.” He nodded in response as we heard my mom call down. “Max it’s getting late, come say goodbye.” Ray and I stood with this, him still a little wobbly. We made our way up the steps, Ray fighting to contain his drunkenness and doing a fairly decent job. I said goodbye to Ray’s parents and brother before turning to him. I hesitated for a moment before wrapping my arms around his shoulders and hugging him. It was just a kiss, Max. Get over it.

I waved to Ray one final time before turning to go home. He returned a one sided smile before closing the door. In all honesty, I could see where he was coming from. He wasn’t the only one who’d ever liked someone without the feelings being requited. Hell, I’d even been in that position. Granted I never acted on those feelings, but he was drunk and everybody makes mistakes.

Even though we’d agreed to forgive and forget, things between me and Ray were still a bit touchy. Sure, for the most part things were back to normal but every once in a while, we’d find ourselves being a little extra awkward around the other one. Thankfully though, no one seemed to take any notice.

…

Bob had come back from his trip to Chicago a few days after Christmas. I met him at his house and as we sat on his bed, he told me all about seeing his aunts, uncles and cousins back in ‘the city’. I had really missed Bob and was just happy to see him again. I didn’t think I could go another day without him. While at his house I told him of my birthday plans for him. Or, his fake ones any way. “So how about you come over around nine and we can celebrate your birthday and the New Year together? Sound good?” I asked him trying to make the offer sound as appealing as possible even going so far as to give him the puppy dog eyes as I said this. I knew he couldn’t resist.

“That sounds amazing. I can’t think of a better way to celebrate.” He smiled as he said this and leaned down to kiss me. It was soft and innocent at first but soon evolved into a heavier, deeper kiss. I put my arms around his neck and pulled him in closer. The kiss became more intense and more passionate as we leaned into each other. Even though this was a much more passionate kiss than any of our previous ones, it was still fairly safe. Well, that is until about a minute later. The kiss became rougher as Bob pulled my body flush against his, the kiss now saying something different. I had never been kissed in this way and didn’t know what to think. I pushed hard against Bob’s lips to try and keep up. Just as I did this, he broke the kiss but stayed just as close to me. He brushed his lips slowly along my jawline and down onto my neck as he whispered softly against my skin. “I missed you so much.” Oh my god, was this really about to happen? I leaned my head back as he placed soft pecks along my collarbones.

This was a totally new feeling for me and I loved it. I closed my eyes and let him continue his assault on my senses. He moved his lips up my neck and placed a soft gentle kiss just under my right ear causing me to shudder a little. He smiled against my skin and I could feel the cold metal of his lip ring sending jolts of electricity down my back. I reached up to hold his face and bring his gaze back up to me. I ran my fingers along the sides of his face, feeling the familiar, prickly scruff on his cheeks. He too brought his hands up and placed them behind my head, fingers laced in my hair. I looked into his eyes as if cueing him.

He leaned forward again and crashed his lips to mine, kissing me deeply. I parted my lips, inviting him in and he took it. I felt his tongue gently slide into my mouth tasting the familiar combination of cigarettes and mint gum I had suddenly missed so much. I felt his piercing brushing against my lips, the smooth metal adding to the excitement.

Bob moved his hands to my waist, right were my jeans started. He slid his hands slightly up my shirt, resting his thumbs on my hip bones. He traced small random circles with his fingers against my skin, sending chills racing through my body. I tried my best to repress the shivers that crept up on me. He pulled my hips in closer to him. Following his lead, I moved my leg over both of his, sitting on his lap and facing him as he continued to move his lips in a steady motion with mine. He moved slowly, running his hands up and down my sides, building the anticipation and I savored every moment of it.

I found the hem of his shirt and started to lift it up over his head. He pulled it off the rest of the way and I looked down at his bare chest for the first time. He was built and muscular but not too big. I ran my hand from his shoulder, along his collarbone and rested it right in the middle of his smooth chest. We were both breathing increasingly heavily and I could feel Bob’s chest rising and falling under my touch. He went into kiss me again, but this time as our lips made contact he lifted me slightly off of him and slowly started to push me down onto the bed. I lay there with him leaning over me, our lips still connected and moving with each other in perfect synchrony.

He pulled away for a moment as if to ask, are you sure? I nodded and mouthed, “Yes.” Bob looked down at me and started to open my shirt. I watched him as he shakily undid the buttons revealing my uncovered abdomen underneath. He leaned down and placed his lips ever so gently on my shoulders trailing kisses along the center of my chest all the way down to my navel. I felt myself let out a deep, sharp breath as I started to feel my pulse and breathing quicken. He slid his hands along my shoulders and slipped off my shirt as I complied and lifted my arms out of the sleeves. He looked down at my scars and trialed kisses along them as if to say, everything is okay now. I sat up slightly to do some damage of my own to Bob. I kissed his cheek nervously at first considering I’d never done any of this before. I started to move down his neck and to his shoulders. I heard him catch his breath as I got to the hollow above his exposed left collar bone. I smiled against his skin, pleased to know that I had caused that reaction and went back up to meet his lips again.

As he distracted me with his lips, I hadn’t even noticed him undo my belt buckle and begin to unbutton my jeans. I looked down at his hands as he began to inch them down my hips then assisting him in the rest of the removal. I took this as my cue to do the same. I slowly and tentatively undid his belt buckle trying to keep my nervous hands steady as I did so. He noticed my slight struggle and took over from there.

There we both were, in just our underclothes. I felt so exposed yet at the same time I felt so safe. I was with the one person I could ever say I truly loved and felt comfortable around even when all I was wearing was my bra and panties. But not for long. As Bob pulled down his boxers I slipped off my underpants, slightly hesitant at first but quickly getting over it. I leaned back onto his bed, pulling him down with me and closing any space between us. I lay underneath him not totally sure what to do. Was it acceptable to ask questions in this kind of situation? “Bob?” I suddenly said shakily, hoping I wasn’t ruining the moment. “Yeah?” he answered as he looked into my eyes expectantly. “I don’t know what I’m doing. I’m . . . a virgin.” He gave me a serious yet kind and gentle look and simply replied, “Me too.” I didn’t feel so bad anymore; at least if we messed up it wouldn’t be either of our faults. “Are you scared?” he asked.

“Yes, a little.” I breathed out. And I was scared; I’d never gone even remotely this far with a guy before. But I was with Bob which made me feel better knowing that I was with someone I truly loved. “We don’t have to.”

“No, I want to.” I said before breathing in deep one final time as he reached into his bedside table to pull something out. He situated himself with the ‘protection’ and I just let it happen. Bob kissed my neck once more and I could feel him breathing against my skin as I held onto him.

I had always heard horror stories of girl’s ‘first times’ and what could go wrong. I can honestly say that there wasn’t single a thing I would change. Sure I was completely scared out of my mind and it kind of hurt like hell but it was still perfect. I had given one of my most ‘precious gifts’ to the man I loved and I felt good knowing that he had done just the same. When all was said and done I lay there with Bob, his arms wrapped around me under the blankets in his bed. We looked into each other’s eyes, thinking of what had just happened. “I’m glad it was you.” He said plainly with a soft smile on his face. I smiled back up to him and replied, “I’m glad it was you, too. I love you, Bob Bryar.”

“And I love you, Max Banks.” No ‘I thinks’ this time. Just plain and simple love. I was sure that he was the one for me and I was the luckiest girl in the world to be with him. Lying next to him, safe and snuggled in his arms after sharing the most intimate thing two people care share was the most right feeling in the world. I wouldn’t trade places with anyone in this moment, because right there, right then, everything was perfect.

Notes

So, uh sex. That happened. It's my birthday today so I'm going out to dinner with my mom and my sisters (my brother is on tour with his band for nine days, but just around the neighboring states) anyway, hope you enjoyed the reading, leave a comment if you like, send me a message, and I'll see you again next week!!!