At three o'clock I deided to at least go home and see what his way of 'making it up to me' was.
i went to check out of the shitty motel and I regretted it when I saw the guy working the front desk when I entered the lobby.

His name is Derek and back when I was a hooker after I'd finish with a client I'd normally fuck him so I didn't have to pay for the motel. I sighed but walked up anyway to check out and pay as quickly as I could.

"Well damn fun ghoul I haven't seen you around here in ages. You haven't found a new motel have you?" He asked smirking at me obviously thinking about getting fucked, and how I probably just finished up with some other guy.

I felt chills run down my spine at the name fun ghoul which I hadn't heard in a while, or at least not in person.
I still get texts from people asking to meet up that use the name and since I'm not paying to change my number I just have to ignore it.

Luckily no ones tried to hunt me down after I didn't respond to them and probably think i just got caught by the police or killed by some pervert.

I glared up at Derek and spoke. "No I haven't found a new motel I just haven't needed to use this one and won't ever have to again."

"So why are you here? Was this like your last fuck?" He asked blatantly.

"no." I said sternly

"so what was it, why are you here if you're not banging anyone?"

I felt my blood boil at the fact that he thinks I only go to a motel if I'm fucking someone, but when I think about it I can't blame him, I gave myself that reputation.

"I just needed to get away and this was the first place I thought of. That's it. I wasn't fucking anyone." I said staring him in the eye.

"Shit so you don't need a free night?" He asked sadly looking at me in a still flirty way.

"No Derek I have money to pay for the night." I said taking out my wallet and of course with my fucking luck a condom fell out. It was from back when I was out at a party with Gerard a few weeks back. I quickly tried to pick it up but he saw.

"Well you also have a condom to pay me in another way." He smirked.

"Derek I have a fucking family now and a kid I'm not selling my ass for money anymore,I got a job and I'm paying you with money." I snapped

"Yea you got a family. Good one." he laughed. "So wanna go in the back?"

"Derek I'm being serious either take the money or I'm leaving without giving you shit."

"Hmmmm.." He said like he was thinking.

"Dude fuck you." I said turning away.

"I know you want to" he called after me and I just flipped him off. I walked out to the car crying feeling no different than if I actually had fucked someone.

---

i sat in the car for a minute in the drive way. I looked up at my childhood home which was now my child's home. Technically my child at least.

I honestly think that Nathan, whether I really want to admit it or not was the main reason I wanted to come back from the motel and give Gerard another chance.

nate is my brother but in my heart he'll always be my kid. If Gerard did take him away from me I probably would kill myself. No matter how mad I am at Gerard he still holds half my heart and Nathan holds the other half, and I can't live with only half a heart, but I can still be mad and hurt at one side of it..

I sighed and then took a deep breath before getting out of the car and walking to the door. I took the hidden key out of the mailbox and went to unlock the door.

I unlocked it and walked in on Gerard crying extremely loud, tears and snot flowing down his face and Mikey trying to calm him down. Every time Mikey tried to touch Gerard to comfort him, Gerard just swatted his hand away and kept crying louder.

I didn't know how to let them know I was here so I kicked off my shoes and shut the door loudly. They both looked up at the noise and when they saw it was me they both looked shocked.
Mikey sat staring while Gerard flew off the couch and engulfed me in a hug crying and burying his head into my neck chanting little 'you came back, you came backs' in his cries.

i awkwardly didn't hug back because I was still mad and he noticed. he pulled off and frowned looking like he was ready to start crying again when he saw my reaction.

*cough, cough* "uhm I'm gonna leave you guys alone for a while, I'll just be on a walk near by if you need me." Mikey said awkwardly walking out through the side door and onto the street.

I looked up at Gerard who looked, well he looked like shit to be honest.
"where's Nathan?" I asked quietly.

Gerard squeezed his eyes shut and a few tears fell before he spoke. "He's been in his room all day crying. H-he won't open the door for me, or Mikey. He fucking hates me now."

instead of saying that Nathan doesn't hate him I just walked past him and went back to Nathan's room.
I knocked quietly on the door and was shocked by Nathan's voice.

"GO AWAY! I DONT LIKE YOU NO MORE!" He screamed.

"buddy it's me." I said back.

He was quiet for a few minutes before I heard him unlock the door and he opened it just enough to see out into the hall and tell if it really was me.

"Daddy said you weren't coming back." He whispered.

"Well I'm here." I smiled. Nathan smiled back and ran into my arms asking me to hold him. I picked him up and walked back out to living room.

Gerard saw I had managed to get Nathan out of his room and his jaw dropped. however when Nathan saw him he got mad and tried to hide himself in my side telling me he didn't want to see daddy.

I sat down on the couch across from Gerard and placed Nathan in my lap but he turned his back to Gerard and wrapped his front around me. pouting and making it obvious he was mad at Gerard by the hmph noise he made when he crossed his arms.

Gerard was was just staring at Nathan looking hurt so I spoke up. "Well?"

Gerard looked up at me confused so I kept talking.
"You told to come home so you could make it up to me and that even if I hated you to come home for Nathan.
I'm here for Nathan but you have ten minutes to make it up and convince me to stay or I'm done Gerard.
I can't take your outbursts of anger anymore and you fucking hit me. That was beyond low to hit me like I was nothing at all. So I'm here now and if you want to apologize you better have your fucking thoughts straight." I said bluntly.

Gerard looked at the clock then to me. "I was so wrong to yell at you and hit you. I- I know my outbursts are extremely rude and painful but I didn't want to tell you."

I looked at him ushering him to continue about whatever he was hiding. "I have paranoia. It's not just being paranoid like everybody else in the world. It's mentally diagnosed that I have paranoia which causes sudden outbursts of anger due to the fact that my mind detaches itself from reality because I have a chronic personality disorder." He sighed and began to cry.

"Fuck frank I didn't want you to know but I think you should...I have a messed up head and the paranoia issue was caused by me fucking my head up with drugs constantly before Mikey got me to stop, or really forced me to.
He found me passed out after doing heroine and cocaine and while I was knocked out he checked me into a rehab center.
I didn't want to tell you because I knew about your mom and I didn't want you to think I was like her and lying about being clean then dying on an overdose.
I've been clean for almost 4 years and haven't done any drugs but they've already done their damage to my mind.
Im sorry frank"

i sat back looking him over and I could see he was terrified about how I would respond to the new found information.

"god our family's fucked up." I said and he looked at me.

"What?"

"Our family is so fucked up. I'm bi-polar and depressed, you have paranoia and Nathan has epilepsy. Could we really have any more mental issues." I questioned to no one basically just talking out loud.
Gerard just shrugged and looked at me.

"So what happens at five o'clock?" I asked and Gerard's head shot up.

"I- uhm..well do you forgive me? I can't really do what happens at five o'clock if you don't...." He asked looking at me with hopeful eyes.

I sat there holding nathan and looked at Gerard.
"I forgive you, but hear me now this. Is. Your. Last. Chance. After this I'm done Gerard.
If you screw up again I'm leaving.
I'm eighteen. I still have a chance to go do something with my life and I'm really still just a kid. You're twenty six and if you fuck this up I'm taking my shot at being a kid again."

Gerard just smiled at me at me and nodded. "I understand and I promise I won't fuck up. But for five o'clock you have to be dressed up okay?" He asked scared like he was waiting to see if I'd tell him no or something.

I nodded and then gestured to Nathan. "What about him?"

"Oh he's coming too and he's getting dressed up too. I think he should just wear what we took him to that dinner for work about a month ago if it fits, y'know the one with the tie?"

I nodded again and stood up waking Nathan who must've fallen asleep. "I'll go wash him off and get him dressed then I'll get ready. Five right?"

Gerard nodded. "Five."

---

I placed Nathan in the car seat and strapped him in before climbing into the car myself. Nathan was asleep but Gerard said not to wake him up and to just let him sleep.

He was dressed up in his little black slacks and dress shoes and a white button up with a fake clip-on red tie. I was almost wearing the same thing as Nathan except my tie was real but it was black. Other than the tie color we matched exactly.

Gerard came out of the house and climbed into the car. he was wearing a blue shirt black tie and black pants along with a black dress jacket.

"Do you want me to wear a jacket?" I asked pointing to his.
He shook his head and told me I looked great. Then he put his keys into ignition and started to drive.

After about out five minutes he reached over and grabbed my hand to hold. "You're not wearing your ring?" He asked sounding disappointed.

"Shit no it's here." I said taking out my set of keys which I had hooked the ring onto. "I had to take it off earlier and I didn't want to loose it." I said sliding it back on and re-grabbing Gerard's hand to hold. He let me hold it but it was stiff.

"Why'd you have to take it off earlier?" He asked sounding like he was trying to stay calm.

"Oh I just didn't want to look at it earlier... I was still mad." I said telling the truth. I didn't want to try and sit at the hotel crying over Gerard while the ring was a constant reminder that at one point he did love me and hadn't hit me.

"can you tell me where you went." He said staring straight ahead at the road unmoving his head.

"I went to a motel-" as soon I said that his hand squeezed onto mine tightly and his words came out barely above a whisper. "Please tell me you didn't."

"what?"

"Please tell me you didn't do what I think you did. Frank please tell me you didn't." He asked more nervous and a little louder.

I stared at him still not understanding. "What?" I asked again.

"When we were on the phone you said you were going to try out your hooker skills. Please tell me you didn't."
He explained sounding heartbroken.

"no!! Gerard I promise I didn't do anything. I was mad but I'd never go back to that just to make you hurt."

he just nodded and the rest of the ride was silent except for when Mikey called and Gerard just told him we where on our way.

we arrived at a place that looked just like a big rec hall from the outside. Mikey was standing at the door waiting for us dressed up in black pants a silver shirt and a blue tie.

"Gerard and Nathan go on in everything's set and I'll send frank in when it's time." He said and Gerard took the still sleeping Nathan from my arms and went inside smiling.

"how come I can't go in?" I asked and Mikey just shook his head.
"you'll see."

After standing outside side for about ten minutes music started playing and Mikey smiled. "That's our queue."

he grabbed my arm and walked me inside the hall. I gasped covering my mouth and almost immediately started crying when I saw what it was. It was a wedding. My wedding.

The hall was decorated in blue silver and black which is why I'm guessing Gerard and Mikey specifically wore those colors, and there was everyone which we had originally planned to invite in rows standing, before we had to call off the wedding because of Nathan's hospital charges.

Mikey walked me down the center aisle between the rows of people and chairs up to Gerard who stood up front smiling and Nathan who was next to him holding the rings that went with our engagement rings on a pillow.

I made it to the front and was crying with tears of joy along with Gerard who had a few tears also starting to fall.
A man walked out dressed in a fancy suit and began to perform the ceremony.

After all the wedding stuff required for us to be married we got to the I do's.

"Do you Gerard Arthur Way take Frank Anthony Iero to be your lawfully wedded husband?"

"I do."

"Do you Frank Anthony Iero take Gerard Arthur Way to be your lawfully wedded husband?"

"I do."

"May we have the rings please." The man asked and Nathan ran up to him with the pillow smiling.
"here!" He yelled and everyone chuckled at his cuteness.

"why thank you." The man said to Nathan who just smiled again and nodded. We then placed the rings onto each other's fingers and then came the words I'd been waiting to hear for what seemed like forever.

"You may now kiss your husband."

---

After the initial shock that we were married I smiled and hugged Gerard tightly kissing him as everyone cheered.

we walked hand in hand together to the back of the hall and then came back out for the cake which was beautiful. Then we talked to the guests and thanked them for coming.

Nathan was running around and dancing to the music in the background and everyone seemed to be having a great time.

By the end of the reception I was still in shock. after saying goodbye to the last guests Mikey walked over to me.
"surprised?" He asked me smiling.

I nodded. "Definitely."

Gerard then walked over and kissed me. "did you like it?" He asked smiling at me and at Mikey.

I looked between them and nodded.
"But-but the price of this-"

"don't worry baby I was able to pay the price."

Notes

The end.


xoxox
mcrlove