My hand shook as I unlocked the front door of my apartment. Well, the apartment that I shared with my boyfriend, Gerard Way. My entire body trembled as I stuck the shiny, silver key into the lock, turned it to the left, and twisted the door knob open. I was carefully hiding a bouquet of artificially-colored black roses behind my back, since it was our four year anniversary and I wanted to surprise him. We had grown distant the past few weeks, mainly because of a new, demanding band I was in and his never-ending love for alcohol. Sometimes it felt like he would choose liquor over me any day, but he also pointed out that I chose music over him every day. The point was we weren't getting along, and I was determined to make this relationship last much, much longer.

I walked into our apartment, half expecting him to welcome me home like a wife would do to her husband who just arrived from a long day at work. I was slightly let down as I realized how empty and lonely my home actually was.

"Gee, are you home?" I asked loudly. No answer.

I sighed and drop the bouquet of roses on the couch. Of course he wasn't home, he was probably at the bar, drinking his life away. Hell, he probably didn't even remember it was our anniversary. I stared out the window, and felt the butterflies in my tummy slow down and decay. Belleville was a tiny, depressing town. The streets were empty, and the clouds were warning us that bad weather would arrive soon. I closed the curtains, and got ready for my afternoon ritual: stuffing myself with chocolate cake and watching reruns of Friends and Full House.

It hadn't always been like this though. There was a time, oh so long ago when Gerard was different. He was the type of guy every teenage girl dreamed about. Truly charming and charismatic. He could melt a woman's (or a homosexual male's) heart with his silly, adorable smile. His hazel eyes, which held years and years of pain behind them, were comforting even during the toughest times. He had a way of making me giggle by scrunching his little pixie nose and making kissy faces at me. That was the Gerard I fell in love with. But ever since he started going to bars, drinking four or five bottles of beer at a time, and sometimes ingesting pills to get "high", he had changed. His smile was no longer silly or adorable; he rarely smiled as a matter of fact. His eyes had lost their glow, and instead of being comforting they looked tired and annoyed. He didn't try to make me laugh as often as he did before. And if he tried, it was usually because he wanted money or booze. My boyfriend had completely transformed into an entirely different person, who I did not feel comfortable with.

I stuffed my mouth with another spoonful of chocolate cake. I could feel the tears threatening to spill, but I didn't want to cry. Not today, the day when I'm supposed to be the happiest because I've been with the love of my life for four years. I turned the TV off and stood up, deciding I should get some sleep before the depressing thoughts took over. As I dropped off my plate at the sink, I noticed a bright red "1" beaming up at me from the voicemail machine. I had a message, probably from Gerard. I hoped it was from Gerard. I pressed play and sure enough, my drunk boyfriend had left me a message.

"Heyyyy Frankiee, babe."

I shivered. The way he slurred when he was drunk frightened me.

"I'm at the barr down the streeet. I made some newww friendsss and I probably won't be back and until much, much later, okay. Love youu."

My heart sank. He didn't remember our anniversary.

"Oh, wait! Wait a minute! There's something for you on the kitchen table! I don't know what it is, I went to check the mail today and found it. Well, gotta go honey. See you later."

I turned to the kitchen table, and noticed a plain white envelope with my name written on it in cursive handwriting. It didn't say who or where it was from. Curiosity got the best of me, so I went ahead and ripped the envelope open. Inside was a small note. A note from Gerard.

Dear Frank,
I really hope you didn't think I forgot it was our anniversary today, love. I know I'm an idiot, but I would never forget something like that. If you found this letter, you probably listened to the voicemail I left. I promise you I'm not anywhere near the bar, or even drunk for that matter.
I've noticed we're growing apart, Frank. I can feel the tension between us, and it kills me. It hurts that you can't look at me the same way, ever since I started drinking again. And what hurts even more is how I feel like I disappoint you with everything I do. It's like I always do the wrong thing. And I try to be good and make the right choices, I really do. But I always fuck up, and end up hurting you.
Today I won't disappoint you, honey. I'll try to make up for everything I've done during the past few months. I know I can't take back all those nights I left you alone and went out to drink, but I hope this helps you realize that I truly do love you, Frank.
Happy anniversary, baby.
Forever Yours,
Gerard
P.S. As lame as it sounds, I actually have something planned for us today. We'll play a little game of hide-and-seek. I've hidden letters and little notes all over our apartment (and in some memorable places around the city) with reasons why I adore and love you. There's twenty in total, this one doesn't count. The last letter will tell you where I'm waiting for you with a surprise. Here's a hint: the first one is somewhere in our bedroom.

I threw the envelope to the side and messily stuffed the note in the back pocket of my jeans. Gerard knew how much I loved it when he did corny, romantic things. Maybe my boyfriend wasn't completely gone, after all.

Notes

So this is the second story I'm posting on here. It's gonna include lots of flashbacks and adorable little scenes. There's absolutely no detailed sex scenes, but there will be scenes similar to that (I don't know how to explain them, sorry). Umm, I guess thank you for reading and (hopefully) commenting and subscribing.
And, if you'd like, go check out my other story (My Own Private Earthquake). I'd really appreciate it. Thanks!