The Screaming Hope
... but as long as you stay reasonable, nothing bad can happen, can't it?
[Ricken Pierce, 10 years old]
It’s not my fault. Its body attracted me. It’s not my fault. Its tiny little legs made mines pursue them. It’s not my fault. Its small ears pointed towards me, inviting me. It’s not my fault. Its pattern, on its back, was extending into a contorting tail that was beckoning me to chase it, for sure.
So it’s not my fault if I’m running after this cat, trying to catch it.
If I catch it, it will be hours and hours of fun, since my mother is busy working. I know this job is really important for her, but I don’t have anyone else in my life except her. This job is so important that it made us move from America to Ethrania, leaving our “previous life”, like my mother said, the one filled with the memories of my father constantly spoken from my mother’s mouth, the same mouth that used to recount me so many dangerous stories, making me dream of fabulous adventures during every night. Thanks to her, I was the best at writing essays, in my previous school in America.
But this was in our “previous life”, the one with Brian as my best friend and Lila as my crush. Sadly, things got mixed and the two became lovers, exiting me from their life. It made me want to punch Brian in the face and cry at the same time. Mom said it was okay, I don’t have to be affected by this; she said I was too young for this, I was her “tough guy”. I didn’t know exactly what she meant, but hey, I don’t love her any less. I mean she’s perfect. At my previous school, some girls had made fun of me, because I was “too attached to Mama”.
Same here, I didn’t know exactly what they meant.
But before I tried to understand them, we moved to Ranem, the state capital of Ethrania. Mom explained everything to me; I had a hard time believing what she said.
“You know I work as a maid Ricken. Well… two months ago I received a very, very big offer. I was… disorientated by the importance of this offer. I mean, it’s way too big to picture it. So… basically, it is the co-op company of the president of Ethrania. Yeah your eyes have a reason to widen… I can’t figure it myself. But they want “a nice, American maid that is not related to the country”, according to them. The wage is incredible too; we won’t have debt problems, like the ones we have here in San Francisco. I will work at the president’s house and you will go to the English school nearby. I… I’ve made my decision Ricken, I’m sorry. We will move by the end of the week.”
So it’s been two months since our “previous life”. I’m in Ethrania now, embracing our “new life”. Err, almost embracing it.
I’m not enjoying it as much as I’m supposed to. Mom is getting all weird, sometimes… angry I guess? Maybe it’s just stress. Yelling became part of her daily basis; she often has this expression on her face now, this expression of angst. I tried to discuss about it with her, but she brushed me off. I can’t blame her: she’s still perfect for me. But it’s true she’s creeping me out sometimes: she reaches her maximum of angriness when I’m on her workplace.
Like right now, for example.
But it’s not my fault. Its fur seems so soft.
You get it.
It’s not my fault if I’m on my mother’s workplace, it’s this cat’s.
I don’t have school today, since it’s Friday. Schools work like this in here, because every day’s role is different from America’s. Friday is like Sunday. Sunday is like Friday. Everything is so different.
School is a lot less fun in here on the other side: I mean okay, I’m working well, I have good friends, I have good grades – thanks to my mom and her fabulous stories – but I’m bored as hell. Yes, as hell. Mum’s not here so she won’t ever know if I’m saying vulgar words or not.
I think…
I think I’ve spoken a little too fast.
She’s here.
I’m here too. On her workplace.
oops.
It’s not my fault. Its body attracted me. It’s not my fault. Its tiny little legs made mines pursue them. It’s not my fault. Its small ears pointed towards me, inviting me. It’s not my fault. Its pattern, on its back, was extending into a contorting tail that was beckoning me to chase it, for sure.
So it’s not my fault if I’m running after this cat, trying to catch it.
If I catch it, it will be hours and hours of fun, since my mother is busy working. I know this job is really important for her, but I don’t have anyone else in my life except her. This job is so important that it made us move from America to Ethrania, leaving our “previous life”, like my mother said, the one filled with the memories of my father constantly spoken from my mother’s mouth, the same mouth that used to recount me so many dangerous stories, making me dream of fabulous adventures during every night. Thanks to her, I was the best at writing essays, in my previous school in America.
But this was in our “previous life”, the one with Brian as my best friend and Lila as my crush. Sadly, things got mixed and the two became lovers, exiting me from their life. It made me want to punch Brian in the face and cry at the same time. Mom said it was okay, I don’t have to be affected by this; she said I was too young for this, I was her “tough guy”. I didn’t know exactly what she meant, but hey, I don’t love her any less. I mean she’s perfect. At my previous school, some girls had made fun of me, because I was “too attached to Mama”.
Same here, I didn’t know exactly what they meant.
But before I tried to understand them, we moved to Ranem, the state capital of Ethrania. Mom explained everything to me; I had a hard time believing what she said.
“You know I work as a maid Ricken. Well… two months ago I received a very, very big offer. I was… disorientated by the importance of this offer. I mean, it’s way too big to picture it. So… basically, it is the co-op company of the president of Ethrania. Yeah your eyes have a reason to widen… I can’t figure it myself. But they want “a nice, American maid that is not related to the country”, according to them. The wage is incredible too; we won’t have debt problems, like the ones we have here in San Francisco. I will work at the president’s house and you will go to the English school nearby. I… I’ve made my decision Ricken, I’m sorry. We will move by the end of the week.”
So it’s been two months since our “previous life”. I’m in Ethrania now, embracing our “new life”. Err, almost embracing it.
I’m not enjoying it as much as I’m supposed to. Mom is getting all weird, sometimes… angry I guess? Maybe it’s just stress. Yelling became part of her daily basis; she often has this expression on her face now, this expression of angst. I tried to discuss about it with her, but she brushed me off. I can’t blame her: she’s still perfect for me. But it’s true she’s creeping me out sometimes: she reaches her maximum of angriness when I’m on her workplace.
Like right now, for example.
But it’s not my fault. Its fur seems so soft.
You get it.
It’s not my fault if I’m on my mother’s workplace, it’s this cat’s.
I don’t have school today, since it’s Friday. Schools work like this in here, because every day’s role is different from America’s. Friday is like Sunday. Sunday is like Friday. Everything is so different.
School is a lot less fun in here on the other side: I mean okay, I’m working well, I have good friends, I have good grades – thanks to my mom and her fabulous stories – but I’m bored as hell. Yes, as hell. Mum’s not here so she won’t ever know if I’m saying vulgar words or not.
I think…
I think I’ve spoken a little too fast.
She’s here.
I’m here too. On her workplace.
oops.
Notes
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@nuclearcloud
I'm not fantabulous, silly... But awww thank you ;)
3/7/14