New kids

(Mikeys pov)
I wake up at 2:36 in the morning feeling so happy and complete. I have two beautiful mates and a nice house and all sorts of wonderful things. I love Gerard and Frank so much it hurts but in a good way. I decide to go up to my room and throw on a pair of sweat pants and an old t-shirt. I stare out the window its still dark and it started raining. I go up to the fifth and top floor of the house going out onto the balcony. Its warm outside and it smells fantastic.
Im going to marry those two one day when Frank and I turn sixteen we will be of age and we can marry eachother and Gerard. Then we could move to the country and buy a house and just have a perfect life. We'll have kids...oh kids. I feel like a sledge hammer smashes my dreams into a thousand peices.
A few years ago I was told by my doctors I couldnt have children. Apperently my brain dosent relese a certian chemical that allows me to get pregnant. I begin to cry not even trying to stop the tears. I cant give Gerard children. I mean Frank could give us children but its not the same. I wount be able to have children to call my own. I wont be able to feel the slight tingles in my stomach. I cry so hard I start retching. I vomit crimson over the side of the balcony. I cant have kids I cant make Gee or Frankie happy. Im such a screw up. I sit on the floor and put my head in my cold unfertile hands. An unfertile fertile thats what I am I think in utter discust and self hatred.
Why did this have to happen to me. I would be an excellent father I think. I cry some more drowning in my own self pitty. Im so pathetic I cant do anything right. Being able to have children is a sacred gift to vampires and humans those discusting creatures. They get birth control and condoms and sometimes even women get 'theyr tubes cut'. They get abortions and sometimes abuse theyr childern. Its unimagenable for a vampire to do those things. Its almost every vampires dream to have children. Vampire babys are so beautiful. Tiny blunt fangs pale skin with rosey cheeks bright innocent eyes and I cant have them. I cant give the gift of life. I fall into a daze of generaly unhappy thoughts each worse than the one before it. Im so lost in my own misery I dont notice Gerard come up the stairs untill he puts his hands on my shoulders.
He sits down beside me with his legs crossed. I sit in his lap and cry into his neck. I know he can sense there is something very wrong but he cant tell what it is yet.
"He shhh its okay. Shhh. Whats wrong baby bro?" He says softly. I stop crying and just sit there my head in his nech his strong safe arms wraped around my thin body. I know I haven told Gerard I cant have kids I didnt want to tell anyone but if hes my mate I havr to trust him.
"Gee I n-need to tell y-you something." I whisper still sobing a bit. He looks at me and I know I have his full attention."Um w-when I was l-little my doctors t-told me I couldnt-" I cant finish before I start crying again. He just rock me back and forth rubbing my back muttering sweet nothings to me untill I calm down again.
"Gee I cant h-have k-kids" I finally manage to say before he picks me up and lays me in the closest guest bedroom. I fall asleep cuddeling Gerard hoping that eveything will be okay.

Notes

Im sorry this chapter is so sad. You all probably hate me now. Like always comment subscribe rate all that good shit. <3 <3 love you all thanks for reading.