You're Never Gonna Fit In Much
Oh And It Has Been So Long
3 years later
Pizza. Oh, yes, I haven't had pizza in forever and it really helps with processing thoughts and what to do with the cards you've been dealt.
" So no friend-zone, right?" Frank begins
" Nope. No friend-zone." Oh god is he about to ask me out because I barely know him and stuff I'd definitly say yes because he'd be asking me out and pizza made this wonderful hapeening happen. I guess our wedding will have to be at this parlor in this dangerous grimy New Jersey town and I'd loved it. Plus, I could totally afford a wedding at this point becausemy art was actually selling and my comic did good and the next one is theoretically going to do better and with the money I've been able to put away I can pay for 7 weddings and international honeymoon trips and houses to match with a little cash left to dabble. All of the above rambling would make every rough break worth it because karma finally paid off. I finally got my way...kind of because I wont die alone.
" Okay."
" Okay?!"
" Yeah, that's cool."
" Cool?!"
I suudenly wish I hadn't encountered him. I could've died alone almost happily so not knowing I was missing out on this wonderful person who I couldn't replace or find a decent copycat of because Frankie's Frankie and 3 yrs ago in this same Judy's Pizza he said... we kissed , like, more than a peck and I was so sure we were- we were m-more than nothing and 3 fucking years passed. 3 years later and I can't live without him and the pizza's not helping me organize my thoughts anymore and I wont let myself fucking cry over unrequited love of all things. I still gotta find a way to put Mikey through college because he just gave up on his grades and sure I have money, but I don't have enough to buy him through college.
" Frank" I let out a pitiful half chuckle because I really did fantasize all this and I've learned to laugh off horrible mistakes just to soften the blow a bit.
" What?" He shoves another slice of pizza down his throat.
I just hold my head in my hand to stop myself from banging it against the table repeatedly and rest my elbow on the barely sanitary tabletop.
" Frankie, Frankie, Frankie ." and I find myself actually giggling because I can't fucking breathe. There's air all around, but for some reason I can't properly function and he doesn't fucking- He just never fucking got it. I love him to death and he didn't fucking notice and better still, he strung me along like a beaded necklace with no intention to put me on and I just followed like a fish out of water being promised the ocean. " I really did think you noticed, but I feel the need to say it because after everything it's just okay. I like you- alot, actually and I thought you'd ask me out or we'd be dating by now, but we aren't and I want you to be as clear as you can be when you answer me." I stopped laughing because I can handle this.
" Okay. Shoot." He starts up on his 8th slice.
" What was your goal because if it was a lay, you could have left years ago." I just watch for a reaction because I'm not mad and I shouldn't have hyped myself up. I just want to know and it's not like this single conversation should ruin everything. It doesn't have to and it wont. I wont let it.
" Honestly?"
"The honest answer is preferable."
" I was in it for a kinky lay." He smiled like it was some big joke and seriously?!
" Can't you be fucking serious for two goddamn seconds?"I grit out and okay, so maybe I am mad.
" I-you were busy trying to make something of yourself and I couldn't help you get from point A to point B. Now look at you. There's food in the fridge, Mikey's trying to get his grades up, you're headed for college." he sighs "How selfish do you actually think I am, Gee? You think I'd make things harder by obligating you to wait up for me when I'll always be so far behind?"
"Come with me. To college. I mean, it could be good." I shrug without meaning to because every school wants him.
"I haven't really applied yet and there really isn't much time to start, so it's kinda-"
"You haven't applied because colleges are fucking calling you. They're practically begging you to go to college. Please, Frank." Pouty lip and puppy dog eyes as a combo always wear him down and when he says we'll see with that infectious smile of his I know I just won.
"Allons y!" I pay the tab , grab another pizza for Bob, Ray, and Mikey and Lindsey if she shows, then I take Frank's hand and try not to skip home because he kind of just said he did like me and everything and yay! because we're totally dating. Right?
"Wait a sec." I tug his hand to remind him he doesn't have to keep up with my quick skip/walk thing any longer.
" I'm waiting."
" So no friend-zone thingy, right?"
" It's only been reconfirmed a gazillion times-"
" Frank!" It comes out like a whiny 5 year old, but I am whiny and according to Ray I'm 5 too.
" No, there's not zonage."
" Would you say yes if I ask you out right now?"
" Yes, I would. Now, what are you implying, If I may ask?" I pause with my hand on the doorknob.
" Would you also say yes if your new boyfriend offered sex?"
" Kinky sex?" He looked like he was reaaly thinking it over.
" However you want." I look through my lashes in the way I know he can't resist.
" I'd say fuck yes."
" Great!"
" It would be, but no one's asked me out so..." He scuffs his shoe and it's adorable how he looks any where but at my face.
" Yeah, sucks." I walk in on that note.
" Gerard!" Frank clambers in after me." Not cool."
" Guys, pizza!" I turn to Frank and kiss him until I think he gets it " You love me."
" That's a statement and as true as it is, you owe me kinky sex."
" You really like to say kinky sex."
Ray and Mikey scurry out of Mikey's bedroom shortly thereafter with Ray attempting to uncrumple his shirt and Mikey abandoning his in favor of wiping most of the come off his chin.
"If you're still hungry, Mr.Way." Franks says, then licks Mikey chin clean " Missed a spot."
I can't help but laugh when they both blush like crazy. " Where's Bob?"
" Work." Mikey responds oh so elaborately.
" Where?" Frank says as he rummages through the sodas.
" Vinyl shop down town." Ray manages around a mouth full of pizza.
" I can't wait to take advantage of his employee discount." Good ol' Bryar knows how to pick em.
" I asked and there isn't one." Mikey says not short of sullenly.
Pizza. Oh, yes, I haven't had pizza in forever and it really helps with processing thoughts and what to do with the cards you've been dealt.
" So no friend-zone, right?" Frank begins
" Nope. No friend-zone." Oh god is he about to ask me out because I barely know him and stuff I'd definitly say yes because he'd be asking me out and pizza made this wonderful hapeening happen. I guess our wedding will have to be at this parlor in this dangerous grimy New Jersey town and I'd loved it. Plus, I could totally afford a wedding at this point becausemy art was actually selling and my comic did good and the next one is theoretically going to do better and with the money I've been able to put away I can pay for 7 weddings and international honeymoon trips and houses to match with a little cash left to dabble. All of the above rambling would make every rough break worth it because karma finally paid off. I finally got my way...kind of because I wont die alone.
" Okay."
" Okay?!"
" Yeah, that's cool."
" Cool?!"
I suudenly wish I hadn't encountered him. I could've died alone almost happily so not knowing I was missing out on this wonderful person who I couldn't replace or find a decent copycat of because Frankie's Frankie and 3 yrs ago in this same Judy's Pizza he said... we kissed , like, more than a peck and I was so sure we were- we were m-more than nothing and 3 fucking years passed. 3 years later and I can't live without him and the pizza's not helping me organize my thoughts anymore and I wont let myself fucking cry over unrequited love of all things. I still gotta find a way to put Mikey through college because he just gave up on his grades and sure I have money, but I don't have enough to buy him through college.
" Frank" I let out a pitiful half chuckle because I really did fantasize all this and I've learned to laugh off horrible mistakes just to soften the blow a bit.
" What?" He shoves another slice of pizza down his throat.
I just hold my head in my hand to stop myself from banging it against the table repeatedly and rest my elbow on the barely sanitary tabletop.
" Frankie, Frankie, Frankie ." and I find myself actually giggling because I can't fucking breathe. There's air all around, but for some reason I can't properly function and he doesn't fucking- He just never fucking got it. I love him to death and he didn't fucking notice and better still, he strung me along like a beaded necklace with no intention to put me on and I just followed like a fish out of water being promised the ocean. " I really did think you noticed, but I feel the need to say it because after everything it's just okay. I like you- alot, actually and I thought you'd ask me out or we'd be dating by now, but we aren't and I want you to be as clear as you can be when you answer me." I stopped laughing because I can handle this.
" Okay. Shoot." He starts up on his 8th slice.
" What was your goal because if it was a lay, you could have left years ago." I just watch for a reaction because I'm not mad and I shouldn't have hyped myself up. I just want to know and it's not like this single conversation should ruin everything. It doesn't have to and it wont. I wont let it.
" Honestly?"
"The honest answer is preferable."
" I was in it for a kinky lay." He smiled like it was some big joke and seriously?!
" Can't you be fucking serious for two goddamn seconds?"I grit out and okay, so maybe I am mad.
" I-you were busy trying to make something of yourself and I couldn't help you get from point A to point B. Now look at you. There's food in the fridge, Mikey's trying to get his grades up, you're headed for college." he sighs "How selfish do you actually think I am, Gee? You think I'd make things harder by obligating you to wait up for me when I'll always be so far behind?"
"Come with me. To college. I mean, it could be good." I shrug without meaning to because every school wants him.
"I haven't really applied yet and there really isn't much time to start, so it's kinda-"
"You haven't applied because colleges are fucking calling you. They're practically begging you to go to college. Please, Frank." Pouty lip and puppy dog eyes as a combo always wear him down and when he says we'll see with that infectious smile of his I know I just won.
"Allons y!" I pay the tab , grab another pizza for Bob, Ray, and Mikey and Lindsey if she shows, then I take Frank's hand and try not to skip home because he kind of just said he did like me and everything and yay! because we're totally dating. Right?
"Wait a sec." I tug his hand to remind him he doesn't have to keep up with my quick skip/walk thing any longer.
" I'm waiting."
" So no friend-zone thingy, right?"
" It's only been reconfirmed a gazillion times-"
" Frank!" It comes out like a whiny 5 year old, but I am whiny and according to Ray I'm 5 too.
" No, there's not zonage."
" Would you say yes if I ask you out right now?"
" Yes, I would. Now, what are you implying, If I may ask?" I pause with my hand on the doorknob.
" Would you also say yes if your new boyfriend offered sex?"
" Kinky sex?" He looked like he was reaaly thinking it over.
" However you want." I look through my lashes in the way I know he can't resist.
" I'd say fuck yes."
" Great!"
" It would be, but no one's asked me out so..." He scuffs his shoe and it's adorable how he looks any where but at my face.
" Yeah, sucks." I walk in on that note.
" Gerard!" Frank clambers in after me." Not cool."
" Guys, pizza!" I turn to Frank and kiss him until I think he gets it " You love me."
" That's a statement and as true as it is, you owe me kinky sex."
" You really like to say kinky sex."
Ray and Mikey scurry out of Mikey's bedroom shortly thereafter with Ray attempting to uncrumple his shirt and Mikey abandoning his in favor of wiping most of the come off his chin.
"If you're still hungry, Mr.Way." Franks says, then licks Mikey chin clean " Missed a spot."
I can't help but laugh when they both blush like crazy. " Where's Bob?"
" Work." Mikey responds oh so elaborately.
" Where?" Frank says as he rummages through the sodas.
" Vinyl shop down town." Ray manages around a mouth full of pizza.
" I can't wait to take advantage of his employee discount." Good ol' Bryar knows how to pick em.
" I asked and there isn't one." Mikey says not short of sullenly.
Notes
I'm back! Sorry it took so long though.
P.S. this is a flash forward and I'm no finished with the stuff from the beginning chapters. Discard this if you want. I just wanted to... i don't even know, but I felt like it and I'm sure I had a reason.
@TwistedKnife
yay indeed.
7/7/14