I am afraid to keep on living

(Cassie's pov)

“Hey, Vic. This is my brother, his girlfriend and a guy that seems to be a friend of mine that I don’t really know what he is doing here.” Mikey said to Vic. “I’m Frank.” Frank said. “I’m Gerard.” Gerard said and then they looked at me. Vic has the same eyes as my lost brother, could he be my brother? I was so nervous that I didn't speak.

Vic looked at me too. “Hey girl. Why are you so quiet? I don’t bite.” Vic said to me. I looked at him, was he really my brother? I have to say something or I would never know the truth. “My name is… is… Cassie…” I muttered.

"You have a beautiful name, shy girl." Vic said and then turned to Ray and asked him if he was feeling better. He didn't say nothing unusual... he isn't my brother. Gerard, Frank and Mikey realized what I was thinking and looked at me with sad faces.

"Mikey told us that you are all adopted. Don't you?" Frank asked to the three stepbrothers. "Yes. Our parents can't have any children but they always wanted kids, so they adopted us." Nathan explained. "And... How was your life before your actual parents adopt you?" Frank asked to them. "Well, I lived in and orphanage." Nathan said. Ray coughed and then he spoke. "I used to live with my father but when I was ten he died and I was forced to live in the streets until my adoptive parents find me." He explained. Vic kept in silence. "And you?" Frank asked to Vic. "I don't like talking about my past." Vic said. "He didn't tell to Ray and I either." Nathan explained.

My brother usually didn't act that secretly. He was definitely not my brother. What was I thinking hoping that he was my brother? My brother is dead and that's all.

I sat on the sofa. I was very sad now to stand there. While Gerard, Frank and Mikey talked with the three of those guys, I stayed sitting there looking at nothing, lost in my thoughts, sad. Before coming here I had hopes that this Vic was my brother. But he is not. I should never have hope in anything, I always have bad luck.

“What’s that on your neck?” I heard Vic asking Gerard. I turned around to them to listen what Gerard answer. “I tried… to… to… well… I tried to kill myself…” Gerard muttered. “Oh my god, that’s terrible. Why would you try something like that?” Vic asked him. “Well… Cassie was in hospital and the nurses told me that they weren’t sure if she was going to wake up. I didn’t want to live without her, she is everything to me…” Gerard explained. Do I mean everything to him? Wow, nobody ever had told me something like that.

“Why was she in hospital?” Vic asked. Gerard looked at me and I shook my head, I didn’t want Gerard to say him that I jumped off a bridge. “Sorry, I can’t tell you.” Gerard said. “Oh, okay…” Vic said.

Vic looked at his watch. “Sorry guys, but I have to go.” He said. “Bye, Ray, bye Nathan.” He said looking at them, Then he looked at Gerard, Frank and Mikey. “Bye, guys. It was nice to meet you.” He said and they said goodbye to him. Then Vic walked towards the sofa, where I was. “Bye, Cassie. Next time I see you I wish you speak more.” He said and laughed a little. “I’ll try.” I said and fake a smile. I didn’t have to be rude only because he wasn’t my brother.

“Okay, so I wish we see us again soon.” Vic said. “Yes…” I said. Then he looked at my wrists. Fuck, my scars were showing. “Why did you do that?” He asked. “It’s not of your business.” I said. “I have to go quickly, but next time we will talk about this.” He said. I didn’t answer so he spoke again. “Try to keep your promises, Cassie. Okay? It was nice to see you again, by the way.” He said and went out of the house. Keep promises… Nice to see me again… My brother is not dead!

Notes

I read your comments like one hour ago (when I started writting), sorry for not updating earlier.