I'm really not okay.
Chapter 6- No broken bones
"Fuck, Frank!!!" I faintly hear someone call in the distance. The next thing I know I'm being heaved off the ground by someone much stronger and larger than Izzy... Who the fuck had their arms around my pathetic little body? I open my weak eyes and see that it's Ray, fuck... I'm pretty fucking lucky to have met him today. Oh my God, did you hear that? I just called myself lucky! ME! HA! I feel myself going faint again and then...
"Heey, Franks?" someone calls to me... Izzy, it's Izzy! I'm at Izzy's!
"Izzy?" I murmur.
"I'm here honey, it's okay, you're okay!" She soothes as she moves closer and I feel her and firm around my little, damaged body.
"It hurts so much, Izzy," I begin sobbing uncontrollably, increasing the pain in my torso.
"Okay, honey. I'll get you some painkillers..."
"No, Izzy. That's not what hurts..." I trail off.
"What do you mean? There is so much blood; I can tell that you’re hurt..."
"Yes, I hurt physically but what hurts most is my heart. He's killing me Izzy..." I clap my hand over my mouth, immediately regretting what I had just said.
"What the fuck are you talking about? Who is killing you? Why does your heart hurt? Are you talking about that guy that you won't tell me you love?" I look away at Izzy's walls, admiring her wall FULL of awesome band +LOTR posters. "Frankie, tell me who it is. I need to know. If they make you feel this way then I need to know who you love, please Franks. Please tell me!" Izzy pleads; I simply shake my head allowing more tears to fall.
"It's my brother," a sad little voice peeps from the doorway. Mikey. That little betraying shit. "I'm sorry, Frank. She needs to know. Look at you. She needs to protect you..."
"Hold the fuck up!" Izzy yells. "Who the fuck is your brother?" Izzy directs at Mikey.
"Gerard..." I whisper. Izzy snaps her attention to me. Shock is painted across her features.
"Gerard fucking Way!?" Izzy yells, not in anger but in shock. I nod and let the tears plummet to Izzy's bed sheets, my eyeliner running down and staining her sheets. Well done, Frank, you've managed to ruin another thing. "What the fuck, Frank? How could you love him? He's been nothing but abusive to you since year seven!" Izzy questions, completely bewildered and understandably so.
"I don't know how it happened but it did. I love him and I don't know why and he hates me and it's killing me. It hurts so much, Iz, so fucking much." I blub as I collapse into Izzy.
"Shh, it's okay. It'll all be okay. Don't worry, Frankie. Do you want to snuggle up to the Hobbit and then sleep over?" Izzy offers and I nod frantically.
This is why I love Izzy. She always accepts me. She never judges me. She knows when I need a hug. She knows when I need comforting words. She knows when I need to talk. She knows when I need to be distracted. She just always knows exactly what I need. She just knows me so well.
Izzy calls Ray who, embarrassingly enough, has to carry me to the lounge. "Guys, what's the fucking time?" I ask and Mikey-the-backstabber informs me that it's 1:13. Okay so I left school at 12:28. Ran for like five minutes and have been awake for about ten. That means that I was unconscious for approximately thirty minutes between 12:33 and 1:03. That's not too awful I guess.
Ray sets me on the sofa where Izzy comes over with painkillers, water and her lovely self. I drink the water, ingesting the painkillers, and make grabby hands to Izzy. She chuckles and sits beside me, cuddling my sore body. I wince as she leans on my hip but of course when she asks about it I say it's just hurting from the kick.
Izzy directs Mikey to her copy of The Hobbit; he grabs it and inserts it in the DVD player, allowing us to all snuggle to the amazing prequel to the Lord Of The Rings trilogy. Mikey and Ray sit on Izzy's other sofa and converse quietly whilst me and Izzy focus intently on the movie.
It's 4:26 when the film finishes. Mikey and Ray seem to have bonded throughout the film and decide to leave together as they discover that they live on the same street. Weird coincidence right? Anyway, they say their goodbyes and walk out together."Hey, Franks. Do you want to go home and get your stuff?" Izzy asks me, aware that I have nothing except for my school books. I nod and she helps me up.
We walk to mine quite quickly. The painkillers were pretty strong and I can't actually feel the pain. I unlock the door and luckily my mother isn't home. I rush to my room, grabbing some pajamas, a new school shirt and my books for the next day. I repack my bag, remembering to put in the blazer and tie that I was wearing.
I grab new boxers, a t-shirt and the all-time-low hoodie that I got from my locker and head to the bathroom.
I strip in front of my full length mirror and examine the bruises Gerard gave me. Luckily the skin around the cuts on my hip hasn't ripped too much. My face is really bruised but I'm sure that even my tiny nose is intact. No broken bones, seven huge bruises and a little skin tearing; all in all, I have fared quite well!
I quickly shower, washing off all of the blood and washing my messed up hair. I hastily dry off and dress my hip, remembering to bring spare, just in case.
I dress in my new boxers, t-shirt, skinny jeans and hoodie before grabbing my bag and running to Izzy, dragging her away from my shitty house and toward her lovely warm home.
Once we arrive at Izzy’s I put my phone on charge change into my pyjamas. Izzy and I snuggle in her bed watching Lord Of The Rings and I let sleep wash over my delicate and broken body.
“Sugar, get up!” A silken voice purrs to me. I know that voice, it’s Gerard. How sweet of him to wake me u… HOW THE FUCK DID GERARD GET IN?
“GERARD!? WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK!?” I scream at him because, seriously, what the fuck is he doing and Izzy’s and how did he get in? Gerard claps his hand over my mouth and puts a finger to his lips.
“Be quiet, Sugar. Your friend is in the shower and I’m sure that if you get much louder then she’ll hear.” Of course I’m not going to be quiet; he fucking broke in for fucks sake. But I nod and smile at him despite of my thoughts… What is wrong with me? Gerard removes his hand from my mouth and places it on my cheek, caressing it with his soft fingers. His other hand finds the back of my neck and he rests his forehead against mine, looking into my hazel eyes with his own.
“Gee,” I whisper. That is all I needed to say for him to get the message. He closes the distance between our lips, his plump pink lips meeting my own. All of my body is tingling, literally every nerve. I throw my arms around his neck and pull him closer, deepening the kiss. When he runs his soft tongue across my plump bottom lip I immediately part my lips, granting him the entrance he was begging for. As soon as his tongue reaches mine, caressing it, I moan obscenely loudly. Gerard pulls away from the kiss, too soon for my liking.
“Frankie,” he begins, looking deep into my arms and framing my cheekbones in his beautiful, artistic, hands. “Frankie, I want you to know that I lo…”
“FRANKIE! WAKE THE FUCK UP! WE’RE GOING TO BE SO FUCKING LATE!”
Oh my fucking God. That was a fucking dream? It was so fucking realistic!
“FRANKIE!” Izzy shouts again.
“I’m up. Calm down,” I mumble. I sit up and sigh. Why the fuck do I have to always wake up when he is about to say it? He can’t even love me in a fucking dream! FUCKING SHITTY LIFE! I get dressed, do my eyeliner and straighten my hair, using Izzy’s straighteners. I put my pyjamas in my bag and put my hoodie over my blazer because, fuck me, it looks cold outside!
When I’m ready Izzy gives me an apple for breakfast and seeing as it has been a whole 38 hours since I ate I guess I can eat it… Right? Whatever, I know I’m gross and fat but I don’t want her getting worried, she thinks I’ve started eating again and I want it to stay that way.
I grab my phone off charge and check the time, it’s 8:15. We need to leave in five minutes to be on time, not that it matters really. Then I notice that I have six notifications! YEY! I’m popular as fuck!
Facebook:
Friend request from Mikey Way.
Friend request from Ray Toro.
Friend request from Rajid Filipe.
Message from Gerard Way.
I accept Ray and Mikey’s friend request. Who the fuck is Rajid? Zero mutual friends! Where the fuck do these weirdoes come from? I decline that weirdo. Now I should probably check Gerard’s message.
‘See you after lunch, Sugar. We have a double tutor session. I’m looking forward to hanging out some more, Sugar. (; I hope that I didn’t hurt you too much, Baby! (;’
Okay... What… The… Actual… Fuck!? WHAT IS THIS SHIT? ‘Sugar’, ‘Baby’, ‘Looking forward to hanging out’, ‘I hope that I didn’t hurt you’… WHAT IS THIS GUY’S DEAL!? HAS HE GOT SPLIT PERSONALITY DISORDER, IS HE JUST A MAJOR PSYCHO OR IS HE EVEN MORE OF AN ARSEHOLE THAN I BELIEVED!? Damn, this boy is confusing me! Whatever, I’m not replying.
I proceed to check my other notifications; two texts from ‘Bitch face’ (AKA mum).
‘Frank, where the fuck are you? It is 1AM and you haven’t done any fucking housework!’
‘FRANK! WHAT ARE YOU PLAYING AT!? IT IS 8AM AND THE CHORES ARE STILL INCOMPLETE! YOU ARE GETTING IT WHEN YOU GET HOME! YOU ARE SUCH AN INCONSIDERATE CUNT!’
Wow, she is such a charmer. I reply a quick ‘Sorry, I fell asleep at Izzy’s’ just so that she knows I’m alive, although I doubt that she’ll care…
“Franks, you ready?” Izzy asks as she walk in, looking as gorgeous as ever. I nod and we set off for school. She tries talking to me but there is only one thing going through my mind.
What will happen this afternoon with Gerard?
"Heey, Franks?" someone calls to me... Izzy, it's Izzy! I'm at Izzy's!
"Izzy?" I murmur.
"I'm here honey, it's okay, you're okay!" She soothes as she moves closer and I feel her and firm around my little, damaged body.
"It hurts so much, Izzy," I begin sobbing uncontrollably, increasing the pain in my torso.
"Okay, honey. I'll get you some painkillers..."
"No, Izzy. That's not what hurts..." I trail off.
"What do you mean? There is so much blood; I can tell that you’re hurt..."
"Yes, I hurt physically but what hurts most is my heart. He's killing me Izzy..." I clap my hand over my mouth, immediately regretting what I had just said.
"What the fuck are you talking about? Who is killing you? Why does your heart hurt? Are you talking about that guy that you won't tell me you love?" I look away at Izzy's walls, admiring her wall FULL of awesome band +LOTR posters. "Frankie, tell me who it is. I need to know. If they make you feel this way then I need to know who you love, please Franks. Please tell me!" Izzy pleads; I simply shake my head allowing more tears to fall.
"It's my brother," a sad little voice peeps from the doorway. Mikey. That little betraying shit. "I'm sorry, Frank. She needs to know. Look at you. She needs to protect you..."
"Hold the fuck up!" Izzy yells. "Who the fuck is your brother?" Izzy directs at Mikey.
"Gerard..." I whisper. Izzy snaps her attention to me. Shock is painted across her features.
"Gerard fucking Way!?" Izzy yells, not in anger but in shock. I nod and let the tears plummet to Izzy's bed sheets, my eyeliner running down and staining her sheets. Well done, Frank, you've managed to ruin another thing. "What the fuck, Frank? How could you love him? He's been nothing but abusive to you since year seven!" Izzy questions, completely bewildered and understandably so.
"I don't know how it happened but it did. I love him and I don't know why and he hates me and it's killing me. It hurts so much, Iz, so fucking much." I blub as I collapse into Izzy.
"Shh, it's okay. It'll all be okay. Don't worry, Frankie. Do you want to snuggle up to the Hobbit and then sleep over?" Izzy offers and I nod frantically.
This is why I love Izzy. She always accepts me. She never judges me. She knows when I need a hug. She knows when I need comforting words. She knows when I need to talk. She knows when I need to be distracted. She just always knows exactly what I need. She just knows me so well.
Izzy calls Ray who, embarrassingly enough, has to carry me to the lounge. "Guys, what's the fucking time?" I ask and Mikey-the-backstabber informs me that it's 1:13. Okay so I left school at 12:28. Ran for like five minutes and have been awake for about ten. That means that I was unconscious for approximately thirty minutes between 12:33 and 1:03. That's not too awful I guess.
Ray sets me on the sofa where Izzy comes over with painkillers, water and her lovely self. I drink the water, ingesting the painkillers, and make grabby hands to Izzy. She chuckles and sits beside me, cuddling my sore body. I wince as she leans on my hip but of course when she asks about it I say it's just hurting from the kick.
Izzy directs Mikey to her copy of The Hobbit; he grabs it and inserts it in the DVD player, allowing us to all snuggle to the amazing prequel to the Lord Of The Rings trilogy. Mikey and Ray sit on Izzy's other sofa and converse quietly whilst me and Izzy focus intently on the movie.
It's 4:26 when the film finishes. Mikey and Ray seem to have bonded throughout the film and decide to leave together as they discover that they live on the same street. Weird coincidence right? Anyway, they say their goodbyes and walk out together."Hey, Franks. Do you want to go home and get your stuff?" Izzy asks me, aware that I have nothing except for my school books. I nod and she helps me up.
We walk to mine quite quickly. The painkillers were pretty strong and I can't actually feel the pain. I unlock the door and luckily my mother isn't home. I rush to my room, grabbing some pajamas, a new school shirt and my books for the next day. I repack my bag, remembering to put in the blazer and tie that I was wearing.
I grab new boxers, a t-shirt and the all-time-low hoodie that I got from my locker and head to the bathroom.
I strip in front of my full length mirror and examine the bruises Gerard gave me. Luckily the skin around the cuts on my hip hasn't ripped too much. My face is really bruised but I'm sure that even my tiny nose is intact. No broken bones, seven huge bruises and a little skin tearing; all in all, I have fared quite well!
I quickly shower, washing off all of the blood and washing my messed up hair. I hastily dry off and dress my hip, remembering to bring spare, just in case.
I dress in my new boxers, t-shirt, skinny jeans and hoodie before grabbing my bag and running to Izzy, dragging her away from my shitty house and toward her lovely warm home.
Once we arrive at Izzy’s I put my phone on charge change into my pyjamas. Izzy and I snuggle in her bed watching Lord Of The Rings and I let sleep wash over my delicate and broken body.
“Sugar, get up!” A silken voice purrs to me. I know that voice, it’s Gerard. How sweet of him to wake me u… HOW THE FUCK DID GERARD GET IN?
“GERARD!? WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK!?” I scream at him because, seriously, what the fuck is he doing and Izzy’s and how did he get in? Gerard claps his hand over my mouth and puts a finger to his lips.
“Be quiet, Sugar. Your friend is in the shower and I’m sure that if you get much louder then she’ll hear.” Of course I’m not going to be quiet; he fucking broke in for fucks sake. But I nod and smile at him despite of my thoughts… What is wrong with me? Gerard removes his hand from my mouth and places it on my cheek, caressing it with his soft fingers. His other hand finds the back of my neck and he rests his forehead against mine, looking into my hazel eyes with his own.
“Gee,” I whisper. That is all I needed to say for him to get the message. He closes the distance between our lips, his plump pink lips meeting my own. All of my body is tingling, literally every nerve. I throw my arms around his neck and pull him closer, deepening the kiss. When he runs his soft tongue across my plump bottom lip I immediately part my lips, granting him the entrance he was begging for. As soon as his tongue reaches mine, caressing it, I moan obscenely loudly. Gerard pulls away from the kiss, too soon for my liking.
“Frankie,” he begins, looking deep into my arms and framing my cheekbones in his beautiful, artistic, hands. “Frankie, I want you to know that I lo…”
“FRANKIE! WAKE THE FUCK UP! WE’RE GOING TO BE SO FUCKING LATE!”
Oh my fucking God. That was a fucking dream? It was so fucking realistic!
“FRANKIE!” Izzy shouts again.
“I’m up. Calm down,” I mumble. I sit up and sigh. Why the fuck do I have to always wake up when he is about to say it? He can’t even love me in a fucking dream! FUCKING SHITTY LIFE! I get dressed, do my eyeliner and straighten my hair, using Izzy’s straighteners. I put my pyjamas in my bag and put my hoodie over my blazer because, fuck me, it looks cold outside!
When I’m ready Izzy gives me an apple for breakfast and seeing as it has been a whole 38 hours since I ate I guess I can eat it… Right? Whatever, I know I’m gross and fat but I don’t want her getting worried, she thinks I’ve started eating again and I want it to stay that way.
I grab my phone off charge and check the time, it’s 8:15. We need to leave in five minutes to be on time, not that it matters really. Then I notice that I have six notifications! YEY! I’m popular as fuck!
Facebook:
Friend request from Mikey Way.
Friend request from Ray Toro.
Friend request from Rajid Filipe.
Message from Gerard Way.
I accept Ray and Mikey’s friend request. Who the fuck is Rajid? Zero mutual friends! Where the fuck do these weirdoes come from? I decline that weirdo. Now I should probably check Gerard’s message.
‘See you after lunch, Sugar. We have a double tutor session. I’m looking forward to hanging out some more, Sugar. (; I hope that I didn’t hurt you too much, Baby! (;’
Okay... What… The… Actual… Fuck!? WHAT IS THIS SHIT? ‘Sugar’, ‘Baby’, ‘Looking forward to hanging out’, ‘I hope that I didn’t hurt you’… WHAT IS THIS GUY’S DEAL!? HAS HE GOT SPLIT PERSONALITY DISORDER, IS HE JUST A MAJOR PSYCHO OR IS HE EVEN MORE OF AN ARSEHOLE THAN I BELIEVED!? Damn, this boy is confusing me! Whatever, I’m not replying.
I proceed to check my other notifications; two texts from ‘Bitch face’ (AKA mum).
‘Frank, where the fuck are you? It is 1AM and you haven’t done any fucking housework!’
‘FRANK! WHAT ARE YOU PLAYING AT!? IT IS 8AM AND THE CHORES ARE STILL INCOMPLETE! YOU ARE GETTING IT WHEN YOU GET HOME! YOU ARE SUCH AN INCONSIDERATE CUNT!’
Wow, she is such a charmer. I reply a quick ‘Sorry, I fell asleep at Izzy’s’ just so that she knows I’m alive, although I doubt that she’ll care…
“Franks, you ready?” Izzy asks as she walk in, looking as gorgeous as ever. I nod and we set off for school. She tries talking to me but there is only one thing going through my mind.
What will happen this afternoon with Gerard?
Notes
Okay, this is clearly a filler. I'm sorry, guys! ):Sorry it took me so long to update this, everyone!
And I'm so sorry that you were all excited for a chapter and I present you with this shit! .-.
Umm, so this is the sixth chapter in twenty-four hours...
HOLY FUCK!
HOW DID I EVEN!
Don't expect such frequent updates though guys because I have had an abnormal amount of free time these past few days but I am back at school tomorrow.
I'll try to update at least once a day though!
Thanks for reading my mediocre writing!
Charley <3
@Thatonefriend
Well it might not have tied up all the ends, but I read the last chapter & it seems like an ending, although the author said "no more than four more chapters" so yeah p much the end.
12/22/18