Save Me From My Self Destruction
Forgive And Forget
***Chrissi's POV***
We headed home. Frank and Jess went back to their apartment to set up the finishing touches to the baby's room. Gerard offered to help, but regretted it when I argued. It's not that I didn't want to help, but I wanted sleep. I hadn't slept for a week and a half. Gee drove me home and I slept on his lap. It was quite a drive so I could start to catch up on my sleep.
***************************************************************************************************************
"Good morning beautiful." Gerard said as I walked down the stairs.
"Shut up. I'm not beautiful." I groaned. My bed-head was everywhere, my makeup was fucked up because I was to lazy to wash it off, and I was wearing the same clothes I was wearing yesterday. .
"To me you are." He winked at me. I rolled my eyes and tried not to grin. I hig under my bed-head and grinned from ear to ear. He got up and brushed the hair out of my face. He kissed my forehead and then my nose and then my lips. I held him close to me. No matter how tired or pissed I was, Gee knew how to make me feel better. His tongue tasted like coffee which was normal. I guess I still had morning breathe because he pulled away. I ignored his disgusted look and went off to get coffee.
"So what do you want to do today."
"Visit Alice." I sad truthfully. i really did miss her and she deserved a visit. He nodded. I went off to get dressed. I put on my iPod to have 'A Lesson Never Learned' by Asking Alexandria start to play. I smiled and threw on a Pierce the Veil shirt with black skinny jeans on. Feeling comfortable, I headed back into the living room. Gerard was sitting on the couch sipping his coffee. Normal Gee. I went behind him and wrapped my arms around his neck and kissed his cheek. He grinned and turned to kiss me. I pulled him in close, but didn't kiss him fully. He grabbed my hand and interlocked our fingers. He got up and jumped over the couch so we were super close. He kissed me. I grinned into the kiss. He opened my lips with his tongue. The phone rang. Gerard groaned and pulled away. He went over to the phone.
"Asshole. Oh nothing. Mmhmm. No, I'm busy today. Talk to you later." Gerard hanged up. I questioned him with my eyes.
"Mikey wanted to have a brother day, but I'm with you."
"Gee, go hang with him. I can see Alice on my own. We can hang out later okay?" He frowned.
"You positive?"
"A hundred percent. Have fun." Gee got on the phone again and called up Mikey. I left the house and went into my car. I sighed while driving to the graveyeard where Alice was burried. I knew exactaly what grave was hers which kind of scared me considering I had only been here twice. I went straight to it to see someone already there.
"Hello?" I said ruining the silence. The man turned. It was Erik.
"Erik!?" I screamed. He was crying and on his knees. I think he was praying, but I wasn't sure because I was never religious. He got up and walked towards me and embracd me. I didn't hug back. I just stood there in shock. I started crying now.
"I shouldn't have left her." He cried. I couldn't answer. The truth was, he shouldn't have left her, but he did and there was nothing I could do now. I looked up to see Eric staring down at me. He looked like he was in pain.
"How long have you been here?"
"I come and visit every other day." I was shocked at this answer. I didn't realize how bad he felt about Alice. I knew he cared about her when they dated, but I thought that ended when she died.
"Chrissi, you have no idea how sorry I am. Not just sorry to Alice, but to you. Why am I so stupid? Why would I leave her? I don't know. I was stupider than ever, and I regret it more than anything. I shoud've been there for her, I should have been the one to hold her hand through all of this. Instaed, I was just being a senseless, selfish dick. And I've never regretted anything more, Chris please forgive me!" he fell to his knees, and cried.
"Do you really mean that?"
"I mean it with everything I fucking have. I am so sorry! I would do anything to just go back, and have her in my arms again. She was the only one for me, and I let her go." he sobbed. He embraced me in a hug, and this time I hugged back. I truly felt sorry for him. Yes, he fucked uo big time, but we all make mistakes. Even though he made a huge one. We sat there holding each other for what seemed like hours. But only minutes. I placed a bouquet of roses I bought for her by her grave. Erik kissed my cheek, got up, dusted himself off, and grabbed me in another hug.
"I'm so sorry, Chris. To you, and Alice." he wispered. Once again, I hugged him back. It's been three years, and although it's hard, I'm ready to forgive him.
We headed home. Frank and Jess went back to their apartment to set up the finishing touches to the baby's room. Gerard offered to help, but regretted it when I argued. It's not that I didn't want to help, but I wanted sleep. I hadn't slept for a week and a half. Gee drove me home and I slept on his lap. It was quite a drive so I could start to catch up on my sleep.
***************************************************************************************************************
"Good morning beautiful." Gerard said as I walked down the stairs.
"Shut up. I'm not beautiful." I groaned. My bed-head was everywhere, my makeup was fucked up because I was to lazy to wash it off, and I was wearing the same clothes I was wearing yesterday. .
"To me you are." He winked at me. I rolled my eyes and tried not to grin. I hig under my bed-head and grinned from ear to ear. He got up and brushed the hair out of my face. He kissed my forehead and then my nose and then my lips. I held him close to me. No matter how tired or pissed I was, Gee knew how to make me feel better. His tongue tasted like coffee which was normal. I guess I still had morning breathe because he pulled away. I ignored his disgusted look and went off to get coffee.
"So what do you want to do today."
"Visit Alice." I sad truthfully. i really did miss her and she deserved a visit. He nodded. I went off to get dressed. I put on my iPod to have 'A Lesson Never Learned' by Asking Alexandria start to play. I smiled and threw on a Pierce the Veil shirt with black skinny jeans on. Feeling comfortable, I headed back into the living room. Gerard was sitting on the couch sipping his coffee. Normal Gee. I went behind him and wrapped my arms around his neck and kissed his cheek. He grinned and turned to kiss me. I pulled him in close, but didn't kiss him fully. He grabbed my hand and interlocked our fingers. He got up and jumped over the couch so we were super close. He kissed me. I grinned into the kiss. He opened my lips with his tongue. The phone rang. Gerard groaned and pulled away. He went over to the phone.
"Asshole. Oh nothing. Mmhmm. No, I'm busy today. Talk to you later." Gerard hanged up. I questioned him with my eyes.
"Mikey wanted to have a brother day, but I'm with you."
"Gee, go hang with him. I can see Alice on my own. We can hang out later okay?" He frowned.
"You positive?"
"A hundred percent. Have fun." Gee got on the phone again and called up Mikey. I left the house and went into my car. I sighed while driving to the graveyeard where Alice was burried. I knew exactaly what grave was hers which kind of scared me considering I had only been here twice. I went straight to it to see someone already there.
"Hello?" I said ruining the silence. The man turned. It was Erik.
"Erik!?" I screamed. He was crying and on his knees. I think he was praying, but I wasn't sure because I was never religious. He got up and walked towards me and embracd me. I didn't hug back. I just stood there in shock. I started crying now.
"I shouldn't have left her." He cried. I couldn't answer. The truth was, he shouldn't have left her, but he did and there was nothing I could do now. I looked up to see Eric staring down at me. He looked like he was in pain.
"How long have you been here?"
"I come and visit every other day." I was shocked at this answer. I didn't realize how bad he felt about Alice. I knew he cared about her when they dated, but I thought that ended when she died.
"Chrissi, you have no idea how sorry I am. Not just sorry to Alice, but to you. Why am I so stupid? Why would I leave her? I don't know. I was stupider than ever, and I regret it more than anything. I shoud've been there for her, I should have been the one to hold her hand through all of this. Instaed, I was just being a senseless, selfish dick. And I've never regretted anything more, Chris please forgive me!" he fell to his knees, and cried.
"Do you really mean that?"
"I mean it with everything I fucking have. I am so sorry! I would do anything to just go back, and have her in my arms again. She was the only one for me, and I let her go." he sobbed. He embraced me in a hug, and this time I hugged back. I truly felt sorry for him. Yes, he fucked uo big time, but we all make mistakes. Even though he made a huge one. We sat there holding each other for what seemed like hours. But only minutes. I placed a bouquet of roses I bought for her by her grave. Erik kissed my cheek, got up, dusted himself off, and grabbed me in another hug.
"I'm so sorry, Chris. To you, and Alice." he wispered. Once again, I hugged him back. It's been three years, and although it's hard, I'm ready to forgive him.
OMG that was so sad when Gerard was begging for forgiveness :'(
1/11/14