Save Me From My Self Destruction
Never Let Them Take The Light Behind Your Eyes
***Chrissi's POV***
I woke up to the smell of fresh coffee being made in the kitchen. I put on my slippers, and walk downstairs. I see Gee sitting at the table with a cup in his hands, and another one on the counter.
"Morning, babes. I made you coffee." he said in between sips.
"Thanks, Gee." I said while pecking his lips.
"How are you this lovely morning?" he asked
"Pretty good. You know, I still haven't forgotten about that surprise you told me about." I laughed
"Don't worry. I haven't forgotten either." he smiled
"Do I have to wear anything fancy?"
"Nope. You don't even has to get dressed at all. It's just some really exciting news."
"Well? Can you tell me now?" I pleaded
"Hmmmm. I don't know if you deserve to know yet." he teased
"Gee please?" I pleaded again, and he chuckled
"Alright, honey. Sit down." he said while motioning me to sit on his lap, which I gladly did.
"Well, since you and I are going to be spending the rest of our lives together, I decided to buy us our own house."
"Gee, are you serious?"
"Yes! Mikey and Alicia can have this place, and you and I can have our own! Just the two of us."
I wrapped my arms around his neck, and held him in a huge hug.
"Oh my god, Gee. You're amazing!" I laughed
"I'd do anything for you, sugar." he kissed my forehead
"We'll be moving into the house sometime next month, so we should sart packing up our stuff soon." he said into my neck
I just held him close, and closed my eyes. Could he be any more perfect?
****3 hours later****
It was now almost 1pm, and Genni had finally woken up.
"Well good morning to you." I said as she walked upstairs
"You guys keep me up too late."
"Hey would you rather we just left you home with your siblings all weekend?" Gerard smirked
"Shut up." she joked
"We made pancakes earlier if you want any." I said
She went to the refrigerator, and took out the pancake mix.
"Oh, uh, sugar? You remember about what I told you last weekend?" Gerard asked
"Uh... Nope.."
"Well uhm. I'm so sorry I forgot to remind you earlier, I've just been so caught up in things, but um tonight's the night the guys and I are starting to tour..."
My heart froze. We had completely forgot. Gerard would be gone for almost 3 months, and I can't go with him because of the size of the van their going in.
"Oh.. Fuck.." I wispered
He wrapped his arms around me and resting his head on my neck.
"I'm going to miss you so fucking much, sugar. I had completely forgotten all about it, but I just got a call from Brian reminding me that we had to leave at 4:30am tonight. "
My day of complete happiness, now had a dark cloud hovering over it. Knowing that I wasn't going to see him for 3 months made me want to cry even harder than I already was.
"I'm going to call you as much as I possibly can, okay? And we can talk for as long as you like "
How was I going to be able to cope? Gee's the one person that can keep me stable. Without him, I'll be a mess! This is going to be the longest we've been away from each other since we met. What if he meets another girl while touring? What if he likes her more than me?
"Gee? Promise me one thing. Please promise me that you won't find anyone else. I mean, I know there are a many other girls out there who are 10 times better tha-"
"Chrissi, stop. You are beautiful. You're stunning. You're amazing, sweet, kind, adorable, and truly the best thing that has ever happened to me. No one compares to you. Chrissi I promise you I'll never find someone else that I will ever love as much as I love you. Please, baby, don't feel so insecure. I love you." he said as he kissed my nose.
I hugged him tightly letting the tears fall down. Both of us had even forgotten that Genni was in the room until she dropped her fork, making a loud crashing sound.
"Aw shit. I'm sorry guys. Don't mind me. Go on, get back to your cuteness." she said, waving her fork in the air. Gee and I both laughed continued to hold each other tight.
"Ah well. I should start packing.." Gee sighed
Gee headed upstairs and I stayed downstairs with Genni until she finished her pancakes. I then headed up with Gee, and helped him pack.
****7 hours later****
Before we knew it, it was almost 8pm. Gee was done packing, and we decided to order pizza. Genni would be staying with me until tomorrow, so I made her get rest since she'll have to wake up at 4 to say goodbye to Gee. He and I snuggled on the couch, ate pizza, and just talked. Mostly about wedding plans, but I also told him about my worried for the next couple months.
"Gee, what if I start to go insane? I mean, your the only one who can keep me calm, and stable. I'm a complete mess without you. You know what I put myself through!"
"Shh don't worry about it, sugar! Don't worry. If you ever need me, I'm just a phone call away, and I promise I'll pick up at anytime of the day. If you're feeling anxious or depressed, or just wanna talk, I'm here. I always will be. There's no need to worry, baby."
He and I just laid there holding each other for hours. I look over at him, and noticed he fell asleep with his mouth wide open, and lightly snoring. I giggled to myself, and kissed his cheek. I snuggled back into his arms, and tried my best to fall asleep since I needed to wake up again in 3 hours.
***3 hours later***
Gee had set an alarm earlier, which woke both of us up. I headed downstairs to wake Genni up since they would be picking him up in half an hour. Of course she decided to be a little grumpy bitch, and not wanna wake up. Well too bad! I shoved her off the bed til she hit the ground with a loud thud.
"Get. Up!" I said sternly, and then left the room.
I found my phone in the kitchen, and saw 4 missed calls and 1 voice mail from Kyliee. Why would she call me so early in the morning? I was gonna call her back, but I got distracted from Gerard calling me. Eh, Kyles can wait. She probably just calling to tell me something her boyfriend did anyway.
I walked over to Gerard who was already by the door.
"Oh god, sugar, I'm going to miss you so god damn much! Like I said I'll call you as many times a day as I possibly can. I'll even stay up all fucking night talking to you if I have to. Aw baby, I love you!" he said as tears came down his face. He cried onto my shoulder, and I couldn't help but cry too.
"I-I love you, Gee. More than anything, okay? I want you to remember that. I also want you to have amazing shows, and let me know how each one goes, okay? Good luck, baby. You're gonna to great."
Gee hugged and kissed Genni goodbye, and she went back to bed. He then walked over to me, and the guys started honking the horn of the van.
"I'm fucking coming!" Gee shouted out the window. We gave each other one last big hug, and kiss, both of us wishing that moment would never end. He slowly opened the door, and looked at me with tears in his eyes.
"I love you, sugar." he said pecking my lips.
"I love you too, Gee. Be safe, and have fun." I said. He then walked out the door, and into the van.
I waved at them as they left, and let more tears stream down my face. I then remembered about Kyliee's calls, so I headed to the kitchen, grabbed my phone, an listened to the voicemail.
"Chris?! Chris please, please, PLEASE answer your fucking phone! I need you to get over here right now, Chrissi, please! I'm at Jason's house but he's not home! There's a robber in his house, and he has a gun, I'm all alone and he's fucking looking for me! I need you to call the cops, do something! Please hurry. I'm scared."
The voicemail ended...
I tried calling her over, and over, but she never picked up. I began sobbing uncontrollably realizing that my best friend- no- sister could be dead. Without even thinking, I ran to my car, and headed to Kyliee's boyfriend, Jason's house. When I got there, I saw that the door was wide open, so I quickly ran inside, not even thinking about the robber that could still be in there. I ran to the basement since that's where she's most likely to hide, and found Jason laying on the ground, crying hysterically, holding Kyliee's lifeless body. I ran over to Jason, and asked him what happend. It took him almost 5 minutes to answer since he was crying to hard, though the answer was clear to me. Kyliee, my life long best friend, was dead, and it was all my fucking fault.
I woke up to the smell of fresh coffee being made in the kitchen. I put on my slippers, and walk downstairs. I see Gee sitting at the table with a cup in his hands, and another one on the counter.
"Morning, babes. I made you coffee." he said in between sips.
"Thanks, Gee." I said while pecking his lips.
"How are you this lovely morning?" he asked
"Pretty good. You know, I still haven't forgotten about that surprise you told me about." I laughed
"Don't worry. I haven't forgotten either." he smiled
"Do I have to wear anything fancy?"
"Nope. You don't even has to get dressed at all. It's just some really exciting news."
"Well? Can you tell me now?" I pleaded
"Hmmmm. I don't know if you deserve to know yet." he teased
"Gee please?" I pleaded again, and he chuckled
"Alright, honey. Sit down." he said while motioning me to sit on his lap, which I gladly did.
"Well, since you and I are going to be spending the rest of our lives together, I decided to buy us our own house."
"Gee, are you serious?"
"Yes! Mikey and Alicia can have this place, and you and I can have our own! Just the two of us."
I wrapped my arms around his neck, and held him in a huge hug.
"Oh my god, Gee. You're amazing!" I laughed
"I'd do anything for you, sugar." he kissed my forehead
"We'll be moving into the house sometime next month, so we should sart packing up our stuff soon." he said into my neck
I just held him close, and closed my eyes. Could he be any more perfect?
****3 hours later****
It was now almost 1pm, and Genni had finally woken up.
"Well good morning to you." I said as she walked upstairs
"You guys keep me up too late."
"Hey would you rather we just left you home with your siblings all weekend?" Gerard smirked
"Shut up." she joked
"We made pancakes earlier if you want any." I said
She went to the refrigerator, and took out the pancake mix.
"Oh, uh, sugar? You remember about what I told you last weekend?" Gerard asked
"Uh... Nope.."
"Well uhm. I'm so sorry I forgot to remind you earlier, I've just been so caught up in things, but um tonight's the night the guys and I are starting to tour..."
My heart froze. We had completely forgot. Gerard would be gone for almost 3 months, and I can't go with him because of the size of the van their going in.
"Oh.. Fuck.." I wispered
He wrapped his arms around me and resting his head on my neck.
"I'm going to miss you so fucking much, sugar. I had completely forgotten all about it, but I just got a call from Brian reminding me that we had to leave at 4:30am tonight. "
My day of complete happiness, now had a dark cloud hovering over it. Knowing that I wasn't going to see him for 3 months made me want to cry even harder than I already was.
"I'm going to call you as much as I possibly can, okay? And we can talk for as long as you like "
How was I going to be able to cope? Gee's the one person that can keep me stable. Without him, I'll be a mess! This is going to be the longest we've been away from each other since we met. What if he meets another girl while touring? What if he likes her more than me?
"Gee? Promise me one thing. Please promise me that you won't find anyone else. I mean, I know there are a many other girls out there who are 10 times better tha-"
"Chrissi, stop. You are beautiful. You're stunning. You're amazing, sweet, kind, adorable, and truly the best thing that has ever happened to me. No one compares to you. Chrissi I promise you I'll never find someone else that I will ever love as much as I love you. Please, baby, don't feel so insecure. I love you." he said as he kissed my nose.
I hugged him tightly letting the tears fall down. Both of us had even forgotten that Genni was in the room until she dropped her fork, making a loud crashing sound.
"Aw shit. I'm sorry guys. Don't mind me. Go on, get back to your cuteness." she said, waving her fork in the air. Gee and I both laughed continued to hold each other tight.
"Ah well. I should start packing.." Gee sighed
Gee headed upstairs and I stayed downstairs with Genni until she finished her pancakes. I then headed up with Gee, and helped him pack.
****7 hours later****
Before we knew it, it was almost 8pm. Gee was done packing, and we decided to order pizza. Genni would be staying with me until tomorrow, so I made her get rest since she'll have to wake up at 4 to say goodbye to Gee. He and I snuggled on the couch, ate pizza, and just talked. Mostly about wedding plans, but I also told him about my worried for the next couple months.
"Gee, what if I start to go insane? I mean, your the only one who can keep me calm, and stable. I'm a complete mess without you. You know what I put myself through!"
"Shh don't worry about it, sugar! Don't worry. If you ever need me, I'm just a phone call away, and I promise I'll pick up at anytime of the day. If you're feeling anxious or depressed, or just wanna talk, I'm here. I always will be. There's no need to worry, baby."
He and I just laid there holding each other for hours. I look over at him, and noticed he fell asleep with his mouth wide open, and lightly snoring. I giggled to myself, and kissed his cheek. I snuggled back into his arms, and tried my best to fall asleep since I needed to wake up again in 3 hours.
***3 hours later***
Gee had set an alarm earlier, which woke both of us up. I headed downstairs to wake Genni up since they would be picking him up in half an hour. Of course she decided to be a little grumpy bitch, and not wanna wake up. Well too bad! I shoved her off the bed til she hit the ground with a loud thud.
"Get. Up!" I said sternly, and then left the room.
I found my phone in the kitchen, and saw 4 missed calls and 1 voice mail from Kyliee. Why would she call me so early in the morning? I was gonna call her back, but I got distracted from Gerard calling me. Eh, Kyles can wait. She probably just calling to tell me something her boyfriend did anyway.
I walked over to Gerard who was already by the door.
"Oh god, sugar, I'm going to miss you so god damn much! Like I said I'll call you as many times a day as I possibly can. I'll even stay up all fucking night talking to you if I have to. Aw baby, I love you!" he said as tears came down his face. He cried onto my shoulder, and I couldn't help but cry too.
"I-I love you, Gee. More than anything, okay? I want you to remember that. I also want you to have amazing shows, and let me know how each one goes, okay? Good luck, baby. You're gonna to great."
Gee hugged and kissed Genni goodbye, and she went back to bed. He then walked over to me, and the guys started honking the horn of the van.
"I'm fucking coming!" Gee shouted out the window. We gave each other one last big hug, and kiss, both of us wishing that moment would never end. He slowly opened the door, and looked at me with tears in his eyes.
"I love you, sugar." he said pecking my lips.
"I love you too, Gee. Be safe, and have fun." I said. He then walked out the door, and into the van.
I waved at them as they left, and let more tears stream down my face. I then remembered about Kyliee's calls, so I headed to the kitchen, grabbed my phone, an listened to the voicemail.
"Chris?! Chris please, please, PLEASE answer your fucking phone! I need you to get over here right now, Chrissi, please! I'm at Jason's house but he's not home! There's a robber in his house, and he has a gun, I'm all alone and he's fucking looking for me! I need you to call the cops, do something! Please hurry. I'm scared."
The voicemail ended...
I tried calling her over, and over, but she never picked up. I began sobbing uncontrollably realizing that my best friend- no- sister could be dead. Without even thinking, I ran to my car, and headed to Kyliee's boyfriend, Jason's house. When I got there, I saw that the door was wide open, so I quickly ran inside, not even thinking about the robber that could still be in there. I ran to the basement since that's where she's most likely to hide, and found Jason laying on the ground, crying hysterically, holding Kyliee's lifeless body. I ran over to Jason, and asked him what happend. It took him almost 5 minutes to answer since he was crying to hard, though the answer was clear to me. Kyliee, my life long best friend, was dead, and it was all my fucking fault.
OMG that was so sad when Gerard was begging for forgiveness :'(
1/11/14