Frank looked at Gerard, keeping eye contact for a little while before he figured out what to say.

“Someone who I cared a lot about...” Frank started and stopped to take a deep breath.

Gerard became aware that it was a touchy subject with Frank. He observed Frank as he became emotional, and it was very obvious for Gerard to see that Frank was trying not to cry. He started to scratch his head, something he had learned Frank did when he got nervous. He also started to play with his lip ring that hugged his lip tightly, something Gerard had observed he did when he became nervous, as well. Though Frank was clearly unhappy with the subject, Gerard couldn't help but think how attractive Frank was when he did his nervous regimen.

“You know, you don't have to tell me,” Gerard explained, “But if you need to tell someone, I can promise that I'm a good candidate.”

“I know,” Frank said, his voice thick with the threat of it about to crack, “My ex girlfriend used to have me play for her a lot, and encouraged me to play in front of other people. In Oregon, I had my own band that did decently. I mean, for a high school band $100 bucks a gig was good. We split it among the 5 of us and everything, but still. “

Gerard watched as Frank started to play with his hair nervously again as he continued to speak.

“Anyways, when um... when she broke up with me she told me that I actually was horrible at guitar, and that I should just quit before I continue embarrassing myself.” Frank explained, letting a tear drip down his face.

He realized his eyes were betraying him as they started to sting. He squeezed them tight and wiped tears off his face harshly, clearing his throat in the process.

“So, I did what she told me to do. I stopped,” Frank said suddenly emotionless, and glanced at Gerard.
“You know that's not true, right, Frank?” Gerard said and touched is friend's leg.
Frank shrugged, “It doesn't matter now.”
“It matters to me,” Gerard assured, “I think your one of the most talented people I know. I promise you that.”
Frank smiled with his lips, but the emotion didn't reach his eyes. “Thank you, I guess I just don't see it.”

“What did she do to you?” Gerard asked simply, but it was such a heavy question. “I mean.. what happened between you guys, if you don't mind me asking.”

Frank sighed, “Um, well, we were dating for 10 months. I've never been happier then when I was with her. You know, she liked all of the same things I did. She listened to all the music I do, she watched all the movies I liked with me, she was so much like me. Um... a couple of months in we had sex. I lost my virginity to her, and she told me that she lost hers to me, too. I'm not a typical guy in the sense that I'll just fuck anything.. or I wasn't at that point. You know, I felt like I wanted to have sex all the time, but I wanted it with her, because I loved her. You know?”

Gerard nodded towards him signaling to go on.

“Towards the 4 month mark I noticed a difference in her. She didn't want to have sex with me anymore, but I ignored it. I thought that it was just me, that I was wanting it too often and she just didn't want to. I'm not an asshole, I know what 'no' means, so I just gave up. She stopped pretty much all intimacy after that. Long story short, she started to cheat on me with some guy named Corey. I found out that a day before our 4 month anniversary date, she had sex with Corey for the first time. For the next 6 months of our relationship she was cheating on me. And... um, she... Corey knocked her up. She got pregnant. I couldn't tell for the first couple of months, you know, and, then she kind of just stopped coming around. She would text me telling me that she missed me, and when I asked her why she wouldn't hang out with me anymore she would always say she was grounded. I went to the music store to get some strings for my guitar one day, and I saw her there with him. He was hugging her from behind like I used to do. She turned around and I saw her belly. It was very... you know, pregnant...”

”Frank...” she started, “I... um, what are you doing here?”
“What the fuck... what happened to you.. who is this!?”
“Frank, listen... we can't see each other anymore...” she started, “I'm... pregnant, obviously.”
“It's not yours,” Corey's deep voice interjected. “So you can just fuck off, now.”
“I'M THE ONE WHO NEEDS TO FUCK OFF?” Frank started to yell, “You're the one who fucking knocked up my girlfriend!”
“I'm not your girlfriend, Frank. Not anymore.” Milly said.
“She's mine,” Corey said.
“Milly, you can't do this... I love you,” Frank pleaded. “I love you.”
“Stop,” Milly said as she started to cry.
“I thought I made you happy, I thought I was what you wanted.” Frank said with tears in his eyes.
“She doesn't want you, obviously you idiot. She's mine now, it's time for you to get over it.”
“You fucking asshole!” Frank said as he lunged towards Corey.

Corey blocked Frank's hit due to the very different height difference. Corey was nearly 6 foot, and Frank was only 5'4. The owner of the music store kicked out Frank since he was the one who started the fight.

“Don't try to contact me anymore, Frank, please,” Milly said and cried into Corey's chest.


As Frank opened his eyes to reality, trying to clear his mind from his memory, he realized he was clinging onto Gerard's jacket. Gerard was hugging him tightly, and Frank was crying into his chest. He's never told anyone what happened that day. Occasionally Gerard would coo something into his ear telling him that everything was okay. Frank couldn't comprehend when he started to hug Gerard, but couldn't deny that it felt good just to cry into someone's arms. He didn't feel judged, he felt more secure then he had felt in a really long time.

“They just got more vicious as time went on,” Frank said into Gerard's chest.
“You never have to deal with them again, Frank. I promise.” Gerard said as his friend sobbed into him.
“They always fucking taunt me with text messages,” Frank cried.
Gerard rubbed Frank's hair softly, “I'll help you get your number changed.”

“Thank you,” Frank whispered.

“You know, I've dated someone who was kind of like that,” Gerard said, “Controlling, and manipulative.”
Frank looked up at Gerard who nodded his head, “What happened?”
“Um, their name was Casey, and to put it simply I was just used. You know, whenever Casey wanted something, I was expected to do it, and I did. If sex was wanted, then sex was given, if Casey told me to cook, I cooked. When I was being told what to do, Casey never said it meanly.. and I almost felt obligated, because it was so perfect in the beginning. I began to think that if I just kept the person I thought I loved happy, things would be fine. So, I complied to what I was told, I gave in to whatever it was that was wanted. Then, I was tossed aside. I felt alone, and pathetic. You know that I draw, you've seen a little bit of what I've done. Casey told ripped up something I spent hours on, right in front of my face. It was like as the paper tore, so did my heart. I was also told to give up, that I wasn't going to be successful. I listened for a while, I didn't draw anything. Eventually, I snapped out of it, though. I realized that I had a gift, and I went to school for it, which is the ultimate revenge in my opinion. I spoke about it, about my problem. I told my brother what had happened in my relationship, and he made me realize something that's really important.” Gerard said and took a deep breath.

Frank's eyes were streaming more then ever now. Everything Gerard had felt everything he was feeling. He finally let his guard down enough to connect with someone, and it didn't hurt him for once. Gerard knew how to be empathetic.

“What did you realize?” Frank tried to say between his sobs.
Gerard smiled and wiped away Frank's tears with his finger, “If you run away from your problems, you're just going to die tired.”

Frank's stomach flipped for some reason unknown to him. Something about that phrase hit home with him. It was so simple, but so deep, so true.

“So, if you ever need a Mikey, someone to talk to I mean, I'll listen without judgment, you know? Sometimes you just need to talk.”

“Can I ask a question?” Frank wondered.

Gerard smiled and shook his head yes.

“This Casey... did she ever come back to you? Or did you ever want to come back to her?”

Gerard's face twisted and his eyebrows burrowed, “Um, Frank...”

“Sorry, I'm sorry, that's too personal,” Frank said apologetically.

“No, it's not that...” Gerard said, “But I haven't been 100% open with you, Frank...”

Frank's head shot up towards Gerard's face. He was no longer looking at him. His glare was down at his hands, picking around his nails that were already very short.

“What are you talking about?” Frank said angrily.

“No, Frank, it's not that I've been dishonest. Everything thing I've said is true, I just have left out a part of my life...” Gerard started.

Frank started to get agitated and inpatient.

“Frank... I'm... uh, Casey was...” Gerard said, trying to get his words out in a normal sentence.

“Gerard!” Frank said, “Just tell me.”

“Gay, I'm gay, Frank.” Gerard finally said avoiding eye contact.
“C-Casey was a guy?” Frank said, “That's what you didn't tell me?”

Gerard nodded. He wasn't ashamed of who he was, he was proud of what he had become, but he didn't know how Frank would react, and he treasured his friendship.

Frank lifted Gerard's face with his hand, “Gerard look at me, I don't care. I'm not homophobic.”
Gerard looked at Frank and realized he'd stopped crying, “You don't care?”
Frank replied, “No, I don't give a fuck who you fall in love with. All I care about is that you've become a really good friend of mine, and I... I mean like... I care about you, and stuff... and I just don't want you to think you have to hide around me.”

Gerard smiled and put his hand over Frank's fingers, which was still resting on his cheek.

“Thank, you, Frank.” Gerard replied.

“I know what it's like to feel like you have to hide who you are.” Frank said, “I was hiding how I felt after Milly...”

“Milly's your ex?” Gerard confirmed.

Frank nodded, “Yeah. After she left me for him I just put up a wall. I drank all the time, I did pretty much everything destructive I could think of. I hooked up with a lot of girls, and kissed a couple of guys even, trying to fill the void. I mean, you saw how I got when I was drunk, imagine that when I'm incredibly depressed. I just became over sexual and was fucking any girl who was willing. I disconnected myself from the world. I made a lot of stupid decisions.”
“I don't want you to make stupid decisions anymore,” Gerard said softly, sadness clearly in his voice.
“You don't know the half of it.” Frank said, crying.

Gerard looked at him, sympathy coated in his eyes, but he'd never vocalize it. He knew Frank didn't want sympathy, he wanted to be heard.

“I care about you, Frank. More then I think you realize.” Gerard said.

The two boys locked eyes after Gerard admitted his feelings. Gerard put his hand on Frank's thigh and repeated what he had just said. Frank nodded and just looked at Gerard. He just watched his eyes for a while before allowing his gaze to run down his face; across his pointed nose, down to his small lips. His lips seemed strangely desirable to Frank. Without thinking in one swift motion, Frank wrapped his hand around Gerard's head and pulled him in. He kissed the lips he'd been staring at with eagerness, even if he was unaware of the source it came from. Gerard kissed back, his lips softer then Frank expected. Frank's lips filled Gerard's perfectly. Where Gerard's lips were missing fullness, Frank's poured in.

Frank stopped himself and looked at Gerard who looked just as confused as him. This wasn't some drunk kiss between two friends like they had previously encountered. It meant something, even if Frank was afraid to admit to himself. Frank wanted to say something, but he just didn't know what to say. He didn't get the opportunity to say anything before Gerard kissed him again. Gerard gently pushed Frank on the bed forcing his back to meet the mattress. He straddled Frank and just kissed him. Their lips would part only for a minute before Gerard would change the angle of his head. Their kiss was sensual, understanding, and comfortable all at the same time. No tongue was needed for it to be attentive to both guys.

Gerard pulled his lips away from Frank's, causing Frank's eyes to open, searching for more. Gerard inspected Frank's eyes to find an answer. He didn't know where Frank was coming from when he lunged towards him, and he wasn't willing to take advantage of an emotionally unstable Frank, no matter how bad he wanted him. Gerard expected Frank's eyes to be emotionless. He expected them to be shallow, and for Frank to feel like this was just another one of his random hook ups; another stupid decision. Instead Gerard saw desire, confusion, and an unknown spark in his eye that he'd never noticed before. He kissed Frank again, only not on his lips. Instead, he planted his own lips on Frank's forehead, gentling kissing down his face. He kissed his eye lid tenderly, moving down to the side of his jaw. Gerard pecked around Frank's jaw down to his neck. The skin was so soft, so delicate, like it's never been touched by anything before, especially not the sun. It was a milky white color which Gerard found to be beautiful. His softly sucked and bit Frank's neck, using his tongue in the process. Frank grabbed onto Gerard's jacket enthusiastically, but he stayed mute. Gerard continued to suck and lick Frank's neck, leaving a mark where he had been. Gerard stopped and moved back to Frank's lips where he introduced his tongue to Frank's. They tangled each others tongues with each other, occasionally stopping for air, but returning to each others lips quickly after.

Feelings flushed Frank's mind. This was all too new for him, he's never been so intimate with a guy before. His nerves took over his body, his hands visibly shaking, his heart audibly racing, and his breathing inconsistent. He had no idea what he was doing, and no idea what was going to happen, and though the reason unbeknown, Frank was more willing then ever to find out.