Hello Angel - Comments

Hoping for an update!

@the government wants your gun


Working on it ^_____^

update update update

@the government wants your gun

awesome haha just wondering because like i said i updated at a random time and it got swallowed on the front page LOL

@Ritalin Rat
haha yeah i saw it but i was driving and i read it at the red lights so i didn't have the time to comment!

@the government wants your gun
Did you see the chapter before #9, i think i updated at a bad time and nobody noticed it ehehehehehe but thank you babes!

OH MY GOD I LOVE THIS SO MUCH. It's so much better and also this entire chapter gave me a rollercoaster of feels, i can't believe how amazing this is. Whata great story. Can't wait for more!

@hundefot.

Wow thank you so much. I'll work on making the chapters longer - I guess I was just more into updating than fleshing it out entirely but this is good. I feel like people put in a lot of detail and the story gets lost - but I see what you're saying and I'll do more of that because what you said makes sense :)

And I'm literally writing while reading the MCR biography book so I can get a timeline and feelings and everything just right - 2005 was a while ago haha I was only eleven and we didnt have the resources on the band we do today... We'll see where this goes, I'm rewriting a lot of the original story which was literally stereotype after stereotype garbage ahahahah

Okay. First off, thank you for updating so quickly!

I love how this story is turning out. It has an original and interesting plot and it really has a promising future. I like your original characters, but also how you display the band's members. Just be careful not to fall into "stereotypes" that get used over and over again in every single story ever written about the guys.

Also, your writing is good. I just wish your chapters were longer and a little more put together so it would be easier to follow. For instance, this chapter and the last one could have been slapped together into one great chapter instead of two good ones. I know it's a hassle to write that long, especially if you're not sure where the story will go yet, but it's so much easier to follow the story if the chapters are a little longer. Being more detailed without really taking the story further is also a simple way to satisfy your readers further if you want to leave a cliffhanger etc. I'm finding it hard to express myself properly, but here's an example:

Frank stepped forward to catch her arm, almost mistakenly. It burned where he touched her and she jerked her arm back, giving him only seconds to realize he'd smeared all her blood on his hand.

In this partyou can fill in verbs, expressions, reactions. How did Frank react when he saw the blood? Did he frown in confusion? Did he look back up at her after he saw it? Sigh before deciding to leave it and then tell her to go back to the bus? What did Maddie do? Look away ashamed? Pretend that nothing happened? Shy away? What was in her head, did she want to defend herself or did she internally want him to help her?

BUT. As I said, your writing is great and I'm really pumped to get more of this story. Really looking forward to the rest, can't wait for the next chapter.

Thank you again!

@hundefot.

Omg you're so cute yes I am writing the update now and will try and post it tomorrow!!!!!!! im still trying to decide if I wanna work in an old plot point from the original story hehehe

OK I STARTED READING THIS VERY RECENTLY AND HAVE DECIDED THAT YOU NEED TO UPDATE IT ASAP. I'M USUALLY A GREAT COMMENTER BUT I CAN'T WAIT AND THEREFORE YOU'LL GET AN AWESOME COMMENT ON THE NEXT CHAPTER. I'M TO EXCITED UPDATE UPDATE UPDATE UPDATE NOW. please?

@Ritalin Rat
it happens. i once posted an update, saw my last one was 19 days before, and couldn't believe it.

@Sharpest_Life_B

Don't worry i felt so bad about the long pause that I'm already almost done with the next chapter xD

@gerweird.
Well now we can just pretend your computer, iPad or phone knows just how must you like this story and can't wait to read more. *heartily agrees but tries to be patient* haha Just messing around. Life happened. Great chtp as always.

God guys I'm so sorry I've been swamped with finals/work. I'll try to have this chapter out to you tonight!

@gerweird.

haha it's ok xP and I'm glad you like it ^_^ I'm writing the next chapter now

this is really good! i can't wait to read more :)

this is really good! i can't wait to read more :)

this is really good! i can't wait to read more :)