Hold on Till May

Gerard P.O.V.

On Saturday, I went to Irmarie's house. I knocked on the mahogany colored door.

"SOMEONE IS KNOCKING ON THE DOOR! I'LL GET IT!!!" I heard Frank yell.

The door flew open.

"IRMARIE! IT'S FOR YOU," Frank yelled.

"I'M COMING! WHO IS IT?" Irmarie yelled.

"GERARD!" Frank yelled his response.

"TELL HIM I'M COMING!" Irmarie yelled.

"Irmarie is coming," Frank said to me.

There was music playing. I think that it's called heavy metal? Yeah, heavy metal music is playing.

"She really has changed you," Frank said as he leaded on the threshold of the door.

"I'm sorry, what?" I said.

"What type of music genera do you think this is?" Frank asked.

"Heavy metal?" I said.

"Correct. Now, people like you will call it 'screamo'," Frank said.

"Well, Irmarie did tell me there was all these different types of rock," I said.

"Well, she's doing a great job." Frank said.

Soon it fell into awkward silence. I looked at my shoes. I think Frank doesn't like me at all. I guess he does have a reason tho.

Frank goes to the same school as Mikey, Irmarie, and I. He's just one grade younger. Sometimes, Giovanni, Gabe, and I use to beat him up. Well, Giovanni did most of the beating. Gabe and I usually were look-out or held them down.

So, if Frank hates my guts, I can see why.

"You like her," Frank broke the silence.

"What?" I said.

"You. You like Irmarie." Frank said.

"Of course I do. I wouldn't be hanging out with a person I hate..." I said in my 'duh' voice.

"No. Not as in like as a friend like. I mean like like." Frank smiled.

"What do you mean?" I asked.

"Oh my God! You love her!" Frank said in his it's-fucking-obvious-motherfucker voice.

"You got it all wrong. I just like her as a friend." I said. I swear my face is burning hot.

"You're blushing!" Frank pointed out.

"No I'm not! It's just cold out here!" I protested.

"Yeeeah." Frank said. "Yesterday when Irmarie came to the kitchen, you were looking at her all night. I bet you thought she was pretty."

"Yeah. She was pretty last night-"

"So you like her!" Frank said.

"As a friend." I said.

"Okay. But, if you hurt her, you will have to face me, Vinny, Spike, Rocky, and Robin. Got it," Frank said.

"Yeah." I said.

"Coming coming coming coming coming!" I heard Irmarie say.

She ran to the door. She looked like she had been doing something before I came. Well, I should of called her, but I don't know her number.

"Dammit! I forgot my jacket!" Irmarie said and ran back to her room.

Frank laughed. "Oh, Irmarie. She usually forgets things."

"What was she doing before I came?" I asked.

"I think she was either practicing playing her guitar or drawing." Frank said.

"She draws?" I asked

"Yep."

"Coming coming coming coming- fuck!" Irmarie said as she hit her foot on a table in the hall.

Frank and I laughed. "Ha ha, funny you guys! Put I tell you, it fucking hurts. Oh I feel like I've been shot!" Irmarie said and she put on her coat.

"Yeah. You're right." Frank said in a serious tone. "It's fucking hilarious!" Then both Frank and I started laughing so hard, we fell to the cold poach.

"Okay. Yeah. It's kind of funny." Irmarie laughed a little bit. "But, man up you guys! You guys have the most feminist laughs ever!"

Frank and I looked at each other as we had calmed down a little bit. Then we started laughing so hard. Irmarie joined us.

Star and Coco came out and checked if we were okay.

"We're fine," Irmarie laughed.

Star and Coco looked at each other and then left inside because it was fucking cold out here.

After a while, We had calmed down.

"Well, that was fun." Frank said.

"Yeah." Both me and Irmarie said.

"Well, I'm freezing my ass off. I'm going back inside. Later." Frank said and closed the door.

"Well then." Irmarie said as she sat up.

"So, where are we going today?" I asked as I held out my hands for her to take.

"We're going to a place," Irmarie took my hands and I pushed her up. "That place is the park."

"The park? In this cold weather. I thought we were going to a place indoors," I complained.

"Man up." Irmarie said as we walked out the lawn of her house.

"Fine. But, if you get cold. It's not my fault," I said.

"Dude, I always walk. Rain, sun, warm weather, hot weather, humid weather, cold weather, snowing." Irmarie said.

"So, now I have to man up?" I asked.

"Yes. You have about twenty minutes to man up." Irmarie said.

"And what are we going to do at the park?" I asked.

"Well, we're going to talk." Irmarie said.

"Talk. Just, talk?" I asked.

"Yeah. Talk." Irmarie said.

"Okay then." I said.

We walked to the park in silence. I knew which park we're going. It was an old park I use to go to when I was a kid, along with Mikey.

When we got to the old park, it looked like it's been abandon for years.

The little park was located next to some woods, at the bottom of a steep hill, where the road was.

Grass grew on the wood-chip-covered ground. Everything that was metal was rusted; monkey bars, the see-saw the merry-go-round, and the swings.

The sand box that Mikey and I use to play pirates, was now growing grass too.

"It seems like you remember this old park." Irmarie said as she took a seat on a swing.

"Yeah. I have a lot of memories here." I said and took the swing next to her.

"Yeah. This park has been abandon for about ten years the most," Irmarie said looking at the park.

"That long!" I said.

"Yep. I still come here." Irmarie said now looking at me.

"I haven't been here since I was five. Maybe seven." I said.

"Yeah. I did stop coming here after a while. I think I was around fourteen when I stopped coming here." Irmarie said.

"Why'd you stop?" I asked.

It was silent for a moment. Irmarie took a deep breath and stood up. "Bad times," was all she said before she started to walk to the merry-go-round.

I stood up and copied her actions.

She saw me coming to her, so she moved to the side so I can sit next to her.

"Do you want to tell me?" I said and gently push the merry-go-round with my foot.

"No. Not yet." She said.

We fell in silence again. The only sound was the wind, cars going by, and the merry-go-round creaking sometimes.

"How about you?" She asked.

"What about me?"

"How did you met Giovanni and Gabriel?" Irmarie asked.

"In eight grade. They transfer to the school me and Mikey went to. I didn't have a lot of friends. Maybe one and Mikey. That one friend, his name was Ray... Toro? Yeah. Ray Toro." I said.

"Ray Toro. He had an Afro?" Irmarie asked.

"Yeah. Why?" I asked.

"He's my cousin." Irmarie said.

"Really. From which side?" I asked.

"Mom."

"What about Frank," I asked.

"Dad."

"Well, he was my friend until I met Giovanni and Gabe. Ray told me on how I will regret it. If not, then I would have changed." I said.

"He was right." Irmarie said.

"I guess he was. And now I do regret it. All Giovanni ever did to Gabe and I was made sure we were like him. Hateful." I said.

"You have a choice, Gerard. You can choose to be like Giovanni, or, choose to be who you want to be. And you know how he hates us 'emos', he hates us because we are who we are. And that's something he isn't." Irmarie said.

"Yeah. Is that why he got mad at Gabe and I?" I asked.

"Pretty sure it is." Irmarie said.

I shivered as cold wind hit against my exposed skin.

"Are you cold?" Irmarie asked.

"Yeah." I said.

"Give me your hands." She said.

"Why?" I asked but I still handed her my hands.

She put both of her hands on mine. Her hands were warm while mine where cold.

"How do you manage to have warm hands, dude!" I said.

"I'm shy. So, I usually hide my hands in my sleeves." Irmarie said.

"You still shy around me?" I asked.

"A little bit. At least I don't mumble a lot." Irmarie said.

"Yeah." I said again.

"And how about you and Mikey?" Irmarie asked.

"Well, I started treating Mikey like shit after I lost Ray as a friend. I really do regret it now." I said and lay my head down on Irmarie's shoulder.

"You've been changing. And it's not a bad change. But that's in the pass now. Focus on the now. Now you and Mikey are getting closer to each other. Now you haven't treated other people like shit. Now is now." Irmarie said.

"You know, you're good at making people cheer up." I said.

"Well, thank you." Irmarie said.

I looked at our interlocked hands. Her hands were still warm, while mines were getting to warm, but cold still.

I let go of her hand, but, I started to trace her palm. Her hands were soft and warm. As I traced her palms where her wrist is, Irmarie pulls away quickly.

"Uh. We should probably go to the bookstore to visit Mikey." Irmarie said.

"Okay." I said.