Frank Signs for Gerard's 9 Pound Package

*Frank's POV*
"SHHLING-BONG!!" The weird-ass busted doorbell of ours rings out around me as I try to clip my toenails.
"God-fucking. Ugh." I clipped one more nail watching it fly across the bed before abandoning my other talons, shuffling to the door.
I swing the door open and cringe at the brightness streaming right into my corneas and whatever else eyes are fucking made of.
"Package for Mr. Gerard Way?" He winked at me.
"Yea thats us."
"Just sign for it and we're good." He held out a pen and gestured to a mini tablet. I used his little special pen thing and signed for my shit.
"Just call me if theres any damage to it..." He replied with a wink. The guy had written his fucking number on the package.
"What the hell man" I whispered as he turned and swung his ass walking to his big dumb truck.
I carried the box inside to the kitchen table perplexed by what could possibly be so heavy and why the UPS guy could have been so perverted over it. I got out a butter knife and tried to pry off the tape, but it didn't work and I gave myself a boo-boo.
I found a power puff girls band aid and got out a box cutter and tried again, carefully.
All I found at first was bubble wrap, bubble wrap, bubble- I found a catalog. The first thing I saw was a full spandex slave suit. What the fuck. Moving on. Finally I found what had made the box so heavy. It was a big, rubber, veiny, man-handling, anus destroyer.
He wasn't fucking kidding.
He planned on putting this in my butt.
My poor, vulnerable, unsuspecting inner buttock.
I sigh, placing the fucking 2 foot long booty wrecker down on the counter and stare at it not sure what my next moves should be. I pick the catalog back up and find that this object weighs exactly 9 pounds and is 18 inches long. Well shit. It's titled "The annihilator XXXL Dildo" and now I'm terrified. This was planned to go in my ass. In my ass.
It said exactly:
"Ready to take on one of the big boys? Feast your eyes, and holes, on the Annihilator Dildo-
Coming in at 18 inches in height and 9lbs, this dildo gives you all that you need for large and in charge pleasure. See if you can take it in from the cock head all the way down to the base. The Annihilator is firm, yet flexible, to work with the contours of your body. This dildo is ideal for advanced users who are ready to give it all they got."
When Gerard said 9 pound dildo I thought he was exaggerating. My ass would never be the same. No, Gerard's ass would never be the same.
That was exactly when I knew what to do.
Gerard won't be getting home from his photo shoot bull shit for hours. Perfect.
***
*Gerard's POV*
I wipe my eyes that are covered in fake blood and grab my bag from the table along with my keys. I get out my pack of cigarettes and black lighter, then throw it on my back despite the fact that there is blood on my back too.
"Catch you guys later!" I shouted to everyone- the photographers, the make up artists, the managers, all them.
I got shouts in return and I took my cue to leave.
I walk out the door and lean on the building's brick wall under a street light. I light up, and take a few drags before some lady looks at me and runs away. Then a teenage boy starts fucking winking at me. What is with these people. It's just blood.
I text Frank to tell him I'll be home soon and that I already had dinner.
Frank sent back "bring home extra lube. whatever flav you like. lots of it tho"
So it's going to be one of those nights. I should probably find a shower.
I throw a ratty towel on the seat of my car and drive to Walmart, late at night, covered in (fake) blood, and buy 5 bottles of "blue raspberry flavored, super slick warming" lube. Great life choices there, Gerard.
By the time I get home I'm glued to my seat by the faux blood and my legs are sticking together.
Grabbing my bags and waddling inside I get tackled to the ground by one certain Frank. An angry Frank. He's angry. Oh Frank is angry.
Angry frank rips off my shit and tosses my bags aside and handcuffs me before I can even gasp whats happening.
"What bag has the lube?" He grits through his teeth.
"The white one." I reply in a tiny voice.
Angry Frank grabs the three bottles of lube and stuffs them in his cargo short's pocket. Now lube-equipped, he stomps over to me and yanks me to sit up, and straight up drags me to the bedroom. I don't know where the fuck he got the strength but he picked me up and tossed me on the bed. That twink can't handle my fat ass are you kidding oh my god. But he clearly did. I haven't said much since I got in the door so I figured I'd ask whats really on my mind.
"Frank what the FUCK did I do"
Angry Frank turned into normal Frank and normal Frank laughed like the normal maniac he is for a second. Angry Frank returned.
"YOU WERE PLANNING ON DESTROYING MY FRAGILE SPHINCTER."
Ooooh. So that package finally came in. Someones just a little upset about an 18-incher being bigger than him. Got it.
"Frank you don't have to be 18 inches to make me happy I promise babe." I reassured.
"No. Nonono. You planned on putting 18 INCHES thats 9 POUNDS of PVC into my SWEET DELICATE ANAL CAVITY. So I'm gonna put it in yours. Are you ready honey?"
"Oh fuck yes oh shit oh fuck fuck fuck." Suddenly my dick sprung up like a soldier at bootcamp during the morning inspection. Yea. Soldier dick. Platoon leader sir dick. Yeaah.

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