Save Me
This Morning Defiantly Sucks
All weekend I moped around and done nothing except sleeping, eating and housework. I hated living on my own, I hated Gerard for making me like him and I hated Heidi for not letting the Gerard thing drop to the point I had to hang up!
She doesn’t understand that it makes me feel ten times worse.
It was a Monday morning and at 6:00 in the morning exactly someone was banging on my door continuously.
Thinking it was Heidi or Callum I got up and went to answer it. As soon as I did I was getting barged out the way by my mum and Shannon. My first thought was ‘what the fuck are they doing here?’
“What the fuck are you doing here?’ I said, trying to keep my cool.
“Do not talk to your mum like that! Ever” Shannon said shouting in a booming voice that scared me a little.
“What are you doing here mum? Why didn’t you just send me a letter as usual? What is so fucking important that made you need to come to the house because I know for a fact that I am not the reason!” I stated raising my voice the more I spoke.
“Actually, we need you to leave the house” Leave the house, WHAT?
“WHAT? LEAVE THE HOUSE? WHY THE FUCK WOULD I LEAVE THE HOUSE?”
“Because smart arse. We are selling it to pay for a house we are going to buy in England. So princess, pack up and find someone else to stay with” Shannon spoke with a smug voice.
“You can’t do this, where am I going to stay?” I asked, my voice almost breaking. How could my mother do this?
“We don’t care, we just need the house clean and free of your stuff, we want you gone in two hours” with that they left and I shrunk to the floor, tears falling as soon as I was sat down.
Shake it off Helena, you promised yourself that you would never cry over her again.
I stood up wiped my face and got ready for school before packing up my stuff. Briefly looking at the time, shit it was 9:00. I didn’t realise that they had been here for so long.
All the things I owned I managed to stuff it on two bags. I don’t have much stuff.
I decided to put my valuables in my school bag, instead off the other two bags, they included a picture of me, my dad and my brother before they died and a necklace that my brother bought me, I would never dare wear it though, I tend to break necklaces easily.
It had been two hours and they were due back any time, I don’t even care that I have missed two hours of school. I grabbed my phone when I heard the door open, and picked up my three bags.
I walked to the door and mumbled “Bye” but instead of just walking out I got grabbed by my arm.
“Where do you think you’re going, princess” I froze.
“Where is my mum?” I asked shaking with fear; please don’t let it happen again.
“Oh don’t worry about her darling, she is coming soon. She’s just burning some photos of you because she found them this morning in the kitchen whilst we were talking”
“What do you want?” I asked my voice monotone
“I want what I have always wanted sweetie” he growled and dragged me upstairs by my arm and into my parents old bedroom.
“No not in here, please” I begged, I didn’t want to. Not where my dad once slept.
He didn’t listen just pushed me down on the bed. I whimpered
“Shut up bitch over wise I will slap you so fucking hard”
I stayed quiet; he pulled my black studded skirt up and pulled my tights down not caring if he hurt me.
I shut my eyes like I used to and heard his zipper being pulled down. He pulled my top up and started tugging on my breasts, it fucking hurt but I was determined not to make a sound and just let him do what he wants so I just squeezed my eyes shut even more.
He then entered me; I have never felt pain like it! It burned and felt like my skin was tearing open. He kept roughly pounding inside me not caring how much it hurt me, and I was still trying not to make a sound.
He grunted and bent down and kissed me forcefully, me refusing to kiss back. He then pulled away and his actions slowed. He grunted once more before he came inside of me, making me want to be sick because of how disgusting it felt.
He pulled out of me, pulled his trousers up and said “Get dressed and leave, now” and walked out of the room.
I scrambled up as soon as he left wanting to get out of here. As soon as I was dressed I felt the bile come up in my throat looking at the bed and the blood stained sheets. I quickly rushed to the bathroom and vomited in the toilet. I then stood up, flushed the chain cleaned my mouth out and went to go downstairs.
I heard him in the kitchen so I went down the stairs as quietly as I could and grabbed my bags, just as I was opening the door he came out of the kitchen.
“Thanks for the fuck, princess.”
I walked straight out and slammed the door, before starting my trek to school, the only place I know to go.
My only thoughts were ‘I wish my dad was here’
She doesn’t understand that it makes me feel ten times worse.
It was a Monday morning and at 6:00 in the morning exactly someone was banging on my door continuously.
Thinking it was Heidi or Callum I got up and went to answer it. As soon as I did I was getting barged out the way by my mum and Shannon. My first thought was ‘what the fuck are they doing here?’
“What the fuck are you doing here?’ I said, trying to keep my cool.
“Do not talk to your mum like that! Ever” Shannon said shouting in a booming voice that scared me a little.
“What are you doing here mum? Why didn’t you just send me a letter as usual? What is so fucking important that made you need to come to the house because I know for a fact that I am not the reason!” I stated raising my voice the more I spoke.
“Actually, we need you to leave the house” Leave the house, WHAT?
“WHAT? LEAVE THE HOUSE? WHY THE FUCK WOULD I LEAVE THE HOUSE?”
“Because smart arse. We are selling it to pay for a house we are going to buy in England. So princess, pack up and find someone else to stay with” Shannon spoke with a smug voice.
“You can’t do this, where am I going to stay?” I asked, my voice almost breaking. How could my mother do this?
“We don’t care, we just need the house clean and free of your stuff, we want you gone in two hours” with that they left and I shrunk to the floor, tears falling as soon as I was sat down.
Shake it off Helena, you promised yourself that you would never cry over her again.
I stood up wiped my face and got ready for school before packing up my stuff. Briefly looking at the time, shit it was 9:00. I didn’t realise that they had been here for so long.
All the things I owned I managed to stuff it on two bags. I don’t have much stuff.
I decided to put my valuables in my school bag, instead off the other two bags, they included a picture of me, my dad and my brother before they died and a necklace that my brother bought me, I would never dare wear it though, I tend to break necklaces easily.
It had been two hours and they were due back any time, I don’t even care that I have missed two hours of school. I grabbed my phone when I heard the door open, and picked up my three bags.
I walked to the door and mumbled “Bye” but instead of just walking out I got grabbed by my arm.
“Where do you think you’re going, princess” I froze.
“Where is my mum?” I asked shaking with fear; please don’t let it happen again.
“Oh don’t worry about her darling, she is coming soon. She’s just burning some photos of you because she found them this morning in the kitchen whilst we were talking”
“What do you want?” I asked my voice monotone
“I want what I have always wanted sweetie” he growled and dragged me upstairs by my arm and into my parents old bedroom.
“No not in here, please” I begged, I didn’t want to. Not where my dad once slept.
He didn’t listen just pushed me down on the bed. I whimpered
“Shut up bitch over wise I will slap you so fucking hard”
I stayed quiet; he pulled my black studded skirt up and pulled my tights down not caring if he hurt me.
I shut my eyes like I used to and heard his zipper being pulled down. He pulled my top up and started tugging on my breasts, it fucking hurt but I was determined not to make a sound and just let him do what he wants so I just squeezed my eyes shut even more.
He then entered me; I have never felt pain like it! It burned and felt like my skin was tearing open. He kept roughly pounding inside me not caring how much it hurt me, and I was still trying not to make a sound.
He grunted and bent down and kissed me forcefully, me refusing to kiss back. He then pulled away and his actions slowed. He grunted once more before he came inside of me, making me want to be sick because of how disgusting it felt.
He pulled out of me, pulled his trousers up and said “Get dressed and leave, now” and walked out of the room.
I scrambled up as soon as he left wanting to get out of here. As soon as I was dressed I felt the bile come up in my throat looking at the bed and the blood stained sheets. I quickly rushed to the bathroom and vomited in the toilet. I then stood up, flushed the chain cleaned my mouth out and went to go downstairs.
I heard him in the kitchen so I went down the stairs as quietly as I could and grabbed my bags, just as I was opening the door he came out of the kitchen.
“Thanks for the fuck, princess.”
I walked straight out and slammed the door, before starting my trek to school, the only place I know to go.
My only thoughts were ‘I wish my dad was here’
update soon please
8/29/14