Broken

I wake up the next morning to find myself in his arms, his face nuzzling my neck and he stirs. I'm too sure exactly what happened, all I remember is passion and crying.
I turn my head to look at him, his face is perfect; he's the definition of beauty.
He opens his eyes and smiles, I smile back. I smiled, actually and truly smiled, I didn't fake it for once.



Later, when we've got up and left my house, he takes me to the lake side. his friends are there, I think he said they're called Frank, Ray and Mickey. They're strangers but i seem to fit, they seem to get me, get my views.

We waste the day being normal. Is that the right word? It's been so long I don't really remember what normal feels like. I don't think normal even exists, i mean what's normal to the fly must be chaos to the fly. It's like Frank can read my mind as he laughs and say "you'll never be fucking normal because nobody is fucking normal".
I don't understand how these boys have learnt so much, they understand life. It's only then I realise there's a difference between being a realist and a pessimist.

Could I be changing?
Could I be......happy?

Gerard puts his arm around and my body tightens, he makes me feel like I'm at home. I don't have a real home, just highways where i waste my time watching the cars and pondering my death.

Notes