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Bulletproof Heart

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Frank’s POV

Me and Jamie got to the hospital and I watched the paramedics wheel Gerard off and I felt tears roll down my cheeks.
“This is all my fault.” I sniffed and Jamie looked at me and he pulled me into a hug where I just cried into his chest.
“It’s not your fault Frank.” Jamie said as he ran his hands up and down my back.
“It’s though, I said to him that he loved what that bastard did to him after he found some coke which I forgot about in the caravan.” I said and pulled away from Jamie and I felt him look at me.
“Why the fuck would you even say that you twat.” Jamie said.
“I don’t know, we got into a fight and like normal my gop did the talking instead of me thinking about what to say.” I said and Jamie shook his head.
“I’m going to see Mam, let me know if and when I can see Gee.” I said quietly and walked off to find Mam as I could really do with a hug from her.

I got to Esme room and opened the door and found Mam reading a book but she looked up when she heard the door open.
“Frank, what you doing here?” Mam asked and I sniffed loudly and more tears rolled down my cheeks.
“I’ve fucked up big time mama.” I sobbed and mam got up and walked over and pulled me into a hug which I returned and I felt Mam kiss the side of my head.
“What’s the matter Frank?” Mam asked as she pulled back.
“I could of sent Gee to a early grave after saying some horrible stuff to him.” I sniffed.
“What do you mean?” Mam said and I looked down.
“Gee overdosed on something and he stopped breathing as The ambulance got to us in the streets.” I said.
“Tell me what happened.” Mam said as she sat down and I did the same and told Mam everything which happened in the caravan.
Once I was finished I looked up and mam shook her head at me.
“Frankie.” Mam said quietly after I had finished.
“I’ve really fucking fucked up.” I said and stood up quickly which knocked the chair and put my hands in my hair which showed my stomach tattoos and I messed with my lip ring.
“I can’t lose him Mam, I need him so much and this is killing me knowing that I am the person who put him in that hospital bed. And I could of been the person who pushed him to kill himself. How can I live with myself if I find out I killed the person I love.” I said but it came out a sobbing mess.
“Frank you need to calm down, Gee is a fighter and he will get through this like all the other times he’s been in hospital.” Mam said and I sniffed loudly.
“I wouldn’t be able to forgive myself if anything happened to him.” I said quietly as I walked over to the window and looked at out it and smiled slightly as Gerard liked to sit in the window sill and watch the world go by.
My phone buzzed and I looked at it and saw that Jamie had texted me saying the doctors are waiting for me to give me a update on Gee.
I sighed loudly and walked over to the door.
“Gee is going to be okay Frank.” Mam said and I looked at her.
“I hope so.” I whispered and went to find Jamie and the doctor.

I got to where I need to be and Jamie smiled slightly at me as I stood next to him.
“Is my boyfriend okay?” I asked and looked at the doctor.
“Mr Way is going to be fine once the drug has left his system but he will be touch and go if he makes the night due to the amount he has taken.” The doctor said and I caught hold of Jamie’s hand.
“I also noticed the scaring over his body, I have never seen Mr Way before and I have not seen his notes or anything like that. Could you help me understand where all those scars have come from.” The doctor said.
“Gee has PTSD and he will probably freak out when he wakes up because he doesn’t deal with new people. The scars are self inflicted as well as from another person harming Gee.” I said and the doctor nodded.
“Is he on any medication?” The doctor asked and I frowned and remember Gee saying something about medication.
“Yeah but I don’t know what he takes though but he hasn’t been taken his medication because he has been stable enough in himself not to take them.” I said and the doctor nodded again.
“Can Mr Way become violent if he was to wake up in a strange place?” The doctor asked and I shrugged my shoulders.
“I don’t know, Gee normally isn’t violent unless he is really distressed or angry.” I said and put my hand up to my cheek from where Gerard slapped me earlier.
“Okay, would you like to see Mr Way?” The doctor asked and I nodded.
“Yes please.” I said quietly and let go off Jamie hand and followed the doctor to Gees room.
We got to Gee room and the doctor stopped and looked at me.
“Can I stay with him over night.” I said and the doctor nodded.
“I will get you a pillow and a blanket and get one of the nurses to bring it in for you.” The doctor said and I smiled.
“Do you know when he’ll wake up?” I asked quietly.
“Should hopefully be in the next day but it’s up to Mr Way to decide if he’s finished giving everyone heart failure.” The doctor said and I chuckled.
“Thank you so much.” I said quietly and the doctor smiled.
“Just doing my job sir.” The doctor said and he walked off and I went into the room and headed straight over to Gerard and kissed his forehead and messed with his hair and with my other hand I put it on top of his hand.
“I’m so sorry baby, please forgive me.” I whispered into his hair and kissed his forehead again and I sat down in the chair and rested my head on the bed and ran my thumb over his knuckles.
“I love you so much baby, please don’t leave me.” I sniffed and just sat there and listened to Gerard heart beating on the heart monitor hoping that his doesn’t stop beating.

I was still looking in the same spot when I heard the door open and shut which made me look over and I saw Fred.
“Shit Frank you look like shit.” Fred said and I sighed as I sat up.
“Think you would be if you’re the reason why the person you love is in the hospital.” I said quietly.
“I’ve brought you some food and drink and a clean lot of clothes. I figured that you wouldn’t leave Gees side but I got Jamie to get you a pack of cigarettes just in case.” Freddie said and I smiled slightly.
“Thanks Fred it means a lot.” I said quietly.
“How’s is Gee doing?” Fred asked as he sat on the end of the bed.
“He had a drug overdose and it’s touch and go of he makes the night but if he does make the night then he will make a full recovery but wether he’ll forgive me or not is a different matter.” I said quietly.
“He will make it and he’ll forgive you. Gee loves you too much to let you go.” Fred said and I shook my head.
“I wouldn’t be surprised if I fucked up the best thing which has happened to me.” I said quietly and Fred looked at me.
“Shit Frank I’ve never seen you like this. Even when you was fucking that asshole.” Fred said and I sighed and looked at Gerard.
“He was just some fuck buddy and who I used to get drugs from and sell them for him. Gee actually makes me want to be a better person and he is making me a better person. I just don’t want to lose him because he is changing me but I feel like he’s my soulmate, he knows me better than what my family does and I don’t have to speak. It’s the same with me around Gee. He got this thing about him that makes him so different so everyone.” I said and smiled a little.
“Well we all have your back.” Fred said and he patted my leg which made me look at him and smiled slightly.
“Take it easy and make sure you rest up.” Fred said as he stood up and looked at Gee and smiled slightly.
“Love you Frank.” Fred said and he kissed the top of my head which made me smile.
“Love you too Fred.” I whispered and Fred walked out the room.
I looked at what Fred had given me to eat.
“How the fuck am I meant to eat super noodles?” I muttered to myself and I got up and walked over to the window and sat by it and looked out the window.
“It’s raining Gee, all I can say is thank god your in here and not dragging me out for a walk in the rain.” I said and I looked back at Gerard and I got out the window and walked over to Gerard and kissed his forehead and stroked his hair.
“You can make me walk in the rain as much as you want. As long as I’m by your side walking in the rain I don’t care.” I whispered and I sat down in the chair and messed with Gerard hand.

“I love you so much baby. Please forgive me on what I have done. I never meant to hurt you baby.” I whispered and kiss his hand as I rested my head on the bed and I allowed myself to sleep but it was a very light sleep.

Notes

Comments

Please don't doubt your writing. The characters draw you in & you want to stay for the ride! I know anyone who writes is critical of their own work (I am ;-), but the beauty is in allowing the creative process to flow.

I caught up on all 29 chapters in just 2 days. My poor Gee. Frank is so real, hot-headed, caring & loving - love it.

Morgawse Morgawse
3/5/18

Loving this!
Poor Gee, That bastard really did a number on him, messed him up good. I hope Frank can help him to recover and take control of himself again.
xxx

I will tell you what I tell every writer who puts down their own smut...ALL SMUT IS GOOD SMUT!!
Loving this!
xxx

this isn't shit at all! love it<3

x-lovebirds-x x-lovebirds-x
11/20/17

Poor gee:( love all The fluff tho;)

x-lovebirds-x x-lovebirds-x
11/11/17