Big Baby (Sequel to Cry Baby) (Frerard)

After dinner, Mikey and Gerard made their way to the hospital to see their mother. Throughout the entire ride, Gerard kept himself occupied watching Toy Story on Mikey’s tablet as he held his leftovers box and his mom’s card. As he watched his movie, he kept thinking about two things-- his conversation he had with Lola about his mom, and the dream he had earlier about Frank. Thinking about it all so much overwhelmed him to the point that he was barely able to focus on his movie. He hoped to himself that his mom was gonna be alright. He knew that Lola sometimes would play tricks with his mind, like all those times that she said that the boogeyman was out to get him. Gerard eventually learned that the boogeyman wasn’t real after all, thanks to all the appointments he’s had with his psychiatrist Dr. Martinez. Lola had to be wrong about his mom dying. She just had to be.
Gerard also thought about Frank. He remembered all those times he would come over to his house after school while his mom was at work. He remembered playing so many “games” with him, as Frank called them. One of them he remembered was when Frank would play with his manhood, stroking and sucking on it until some weird white stuff came out of it. Sometimes Frank would play these games with Gerard with him dressed up in a black outfit with tights and cuffed to the bed. Other times, Frank would play a game with Gerard that he had mixed feelings about, where Frank would put his “pee-pee” (as Gerard used to call it) in his butt, thrusting back and forth with it inside. Gerard remembered it would hurt him, and he didn’t know why Frank took interest in playing such a game. He also remembered that he would sometimes feel dizzy and disoriented before Frank would play this game with him sometimes, and it would make him hurt less. Gerard didn’t know why this was so. After every time Frank would play his games with Gerard, he would treat him with candy and ice cream. He didn’t know why Frank suddenly disappeared. He didn’t know what happened to him before he would play all those games with him. He really wished he knew. There was a part of him that missed him and his games.
Mikey and Gerard soon made it to the hospital after what seemed like hours, driving their car into the parking lot and turning off the engine. They walked through the front lobby to the lady at the desk, where Mikey signed in and walked with Gerard up the elevator to the third floor. When they walked towards her room, they were greeted by her doctor. Mikey felt his heart drop into his stomach when he saw the somber look on his face.
“How is she, Dr. Johnson?” he asked.
“I’m sorry, but...she hasn’t been getting any better. In fact, she’s gotten worse,” Dr. Johnson sighed. “We’re starting to doubt that she has a chance at pulling through. She has a five percent chance, at best,”
“Oh, no...just what I feared…,” Mikey said woefully, his eyes forlorn as he looked down at his feet.
“Wh-what? What’s wr-wrong with h-her?” a confused Gerard asked, turning to his brother for answers. “Is sh-she g-gonna be o-okay?”
“Listen,” Dr. Johnson said, turning to Gerard. “We did our best to take care of your mother, but...the chemo isn’t working like it used to, and the cancer’s gotten worse. She’s grown tired and weak from all the fighting she’s done. The best we can all do is make sure she’s comfortable,”
“B-but...sh-she’s not g-gonna d-die, is sh-she?” Gerard asked, still unable to fully grasp the situation he and Mikey have been faced with. Despite this, he felt a sense of panic and dread within him. He knew something was very wrong, but his mind was so far in denial that he couldn’t point out what it was.
“Is she at least conscious?” Mikey asked.
“Yes, she is. She’s been very nauseous and sleeping a lot from the medicine we’ve given her to ease her pain, but she can still hear, see, and talk to you. Listen to her closely, though. Her voice is very weak and hoarse,”
“Okay, thank you,” Mikey nodded, feeling his voice quiver from the tears he tried to hold back. He turned to Gerard, who still looked confused, looking to his brother for the answers he wanted to hear. “Come on, Gee. Let’s go see mom,”
“Okay,” Gerard nodded back, following Mikey down the hall. They soon stopped in front of room 3124, where their mom awaited for her sons.
“Gerard, before we go in… please be gentle and quiet around her, okay?” Mikey asked as he held onto the doorknob of his mom’s room. Gerard nodded, eager to step inside and give her the card he made the day before. Slowly, the Way brothers stepped inside the room, seeing their mother lying in the hospital bed she’s been bound to due to her illness, sound asleep. Mikey couldn’t help but let a few tears slip from his eyes, seeing his mother weak and frail. Her blonde hair was absent from her head and her eyes were sunken. She looked so thin like she hasn’t eaten in days, maybe even weeks. She still had an oxygen cannula hooked up to her nose like she always did since she was first admitted, as well as other machines working for her dying body. One of them beeped repeatedly, monitoring her heart rate. Mikey knew she looked much worse than she did last week. Gerard, on the other hand, smiled despite seeing his mother in such a terrible state. He knew she was sick, but still happy to see her nonetheless. What Dr. Johnson told him about Donna earlier clearly hadn’t sunken into his head. He still felt something was wrong, though.
“M-mommy’s sleeping, M-mikey,” Gerard said, sitting down in a chair at Donna’s bedside.
“She is, Gerard. Don’t wake her up,” Mikey replied, joining him. He slowly wrapped his hand around one of his mother’s, rubbing his thumb over it softly. As he did, he felt his tears get the best of him, crying in silence as he sniffled.
“M-mikey, wh-why are y-you c-crying?” Gerard asked, giving Mikey a concerned look. “M-mommy doesn’t l-like t-to see y-you s-sad,”
“He’s right, you know…,” a distinct voice spoke, sounding weak and hoarse. The Way brothers turned to find their mother slowly opening up her eyes, smiling at her two sons.
“M-mommy!” Gerard smiled, holding up his card he made for his mom. “L-look wh-what I m-made f-for you!”
“Oh, let me see,” Donna replied, taking the card from Gerard and reading it. “It’s beautiful, Ger-bear. Thank you. You can put it next to my flower vase,”
“Y-you’re w-welcome,” Gerard said, taking back the card and placing it next to the vase of flowers on the nightstand next to Donna’s bed. He suddenly remembered the good news he wanted to announce to her regarding his part time job at the local movie theater as a janitor. “H-hey m-mommy, g-guess wh-what?”
“What?”
“I-I g-get p-promoted next m-month at m-my job! I g-get to w-work at the s-snack b-bar, wh-where th-there’s p-popcorn, c-candy, and s-soda,”
“Oh, that’s great,” Donna said, before falling into one of her many coughing fits, wheezing and gasping for air.
“Are you okay, mom? You want some water?” Mikey asked.
“No, I’m fine. Don’t go bug the nurses here. They’ve got more important things to do than to take care of me,” Donna replied.
“Don’t talk like that,” Mikey argued. “Their job is to take care of you,”
“I know, but...there’s no chance that I’m gonna survive no matter what they do. Even the doctor said I’m not gonna make it. The people that work here should focus on the patients that do have a chance at surviving...especially the children here. They have their whole lives ahead of them. Not me, though. I’m at the end of the line,”
“Mom, please stop talking like that...please,” Mikey begged shakily, his face contorted to a look of trying to hold back his tears, but failing.
“M-mommy...wh-what are y-you t-talking about?” Gerard asked, naive yet panicked.
“Gerard,” Donna said weakly, looking her eldest son sincerely in the eye before she nearly coughed and hacked her lungs out. She reached out a hand to Gerard’s and held it tight in her’s. “I know I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it again one last time--I am so proud of you. I couldn’t ask for a better first son. You’ve come so far from where you’ve started all those years ago. You’re becoming responsible. You’re learning to become more independent. Now look at you--you’re getting a promotion at work. And you, Mikey…,” Donna paused as her free hand took Mikey’s. “I’m very proud of you too. Not just for helping your brother, but for how much you’ve accomplished as well. You did good in school and kept your little nose clean. You got accepted into that university you so badly wanted to get into, and you excelled greatly there. You’ve got a degree in business, and you’ve got an amazing fiance. Keep her close to you, Michael. She’s a keeper. I am sorry I won’t be there in the future to see you two walk down the aisle and exchange your vows, but your brother here will. Please, continue to take care of him for me...okay?”
“Mom, please...you’re not gonna leave us now. You’re not gonna die now…,” Mikey sniffled as tears ran from his raw hazel eyes. “You will make it to see me and Kristen get married. You will live to see Gerard grow. Please--”
“M-mikey, s-stop c-crying...you’re s-scaring me and m-mommy,” Gerard fussed, looking to his mom for approval. “R-right, m-mommy?”
“Ger-bear...he has a right to be sad, and I’m not scared. I’m happy. I’ve raised two wonderful young boys. My job is done now. Even when I’m gone, I’ll die happy knowing I’ve accomplished a job well done…,”
“Wh-what? Y-you’re not g-gonna die, m-mommy!” Gerard nearly yelled, feeling a pang in his chest and now only realizing what was really happening, his denial fading away. “I w-won’t let y-you d-die, m-mommy!”
“I’m tired, boys…,” Donna said as a single tear ran from one of her hazel eyes. “It’s time for me to rest now. I love you both so much. Goodnight…,”
Donna slowly shut her eyes, leaving Gerard panicked and Mikey weeping. They both felt her hands fall limp in theirs as the machines around her began to beep loudly, indicating that the body they’re supporting is giving in on them. As Mikey cried into his fading mother’s hand, Gerard leaned forward and began to shake her lifeless body, his eyes wide with dismay and helplessness.
“M-mommy, w-wake up! M-mommy!” he yelled, his mother’s body unresponsive in his shaking hands. “M-mommy, m-mommy, w-wake up!”
“Gerard...you gotta let go,” Mikey said shakily as he continued to cry uncontrollably, putting a firm hand on his brother’s shoulder, the brief denial in his heart he previously held now gone. “She’s not gonna wake up. She’s gone. She’s in a better place now,”
“N-no, y-you’re lying!” Gerard shouted back, venom in his shaky voice as he continued to hold Donna’s body close to his. “Sh-she’s j-just sleeping! Sh-she has t-to wake up!”
Behind the Way brothers, a few aides and nurses walked in along with Dr. Johnson, all of them aware of the patient that just passed away. The doctor put a hand on Gerard’s, begging to let go of her.
“I’m sorry, Gerard… I know it’s hard, but you gotta let go. You’re disturbing the other patients--”
“N-no! Y-you’re all w-wrong!” Gerard screamed, slapping away Dr. Johnson’s hand as tears began to wet his distraught eyes. “Sh-she’s not d-dead! Sh-she’s j-just s-sleeping...sh-she’s not d-dead!”
Dr. Johnson turned to the aides, whispering a few words with them. They nodded, walking over to the frantic Gerard and together firmly pulling him away from his mother’s corpse and out of the room, exchanging soothing words of reassurance to him as Gerard kicked and screamed under their hold, crying out for his mother.

Notes