Never been better

Frank’s POV

Its been a week since I asked Gerard to marry me and he was currently throwing his guts up in the bathroom and left me in charge of getting Seth ready for school.
”Go get your bag and say bye to Rella and Nix while I check on daddy a minute.” I said and Seth nodded and he went off to say bye to Rella and Phoenix.
I knocked on the bathroom door and I checked if it was locked which it wasn’t so I let myself in.
”Hey Baby, how you feeling?” I asked as I sat next to him.
”I feel like shit. But hey I’ve only threw up 3 times this morning so far so that’s a plus compared to yesterday.” Gerard said and he looked at me.
”Have you taken a test yet?” I asked and Gerard rolled his eyes at me.
”Not yet.” Gerard said and I frowned at him.
”Why not? Don’t you want to know.” I said and Gerard chuckled.
”Of course I want to know. I was going to wait until you get home from taking Seth to school.” Gerard said.
”Take it while I’m out, then we don’t have to wait so long.” I said and Gerard smiled and lent forward and kissed me which I returned.
“Was planning too.” Gerard said quietly and kissed me again.
”As much as I love kissing you, I don’t love the taste of vomit.” I said and Gerard chuckled.
”I can’t help it.” Gerard said and I smiled.
”Finished being sick?” I asked and Gerard nodded and I reached up and flushed the toilet.
”Papa are you finished?” Seth from the other side of the door.
”Just coming Baby.” I said and looked at Gerard who smiled at me.
”Take Rella with you Please, I need some peace.” Gerard said and I nodded and stood up, helping Gerard up as well.
”I love you.” I said quietly.
”I love you too.” Gerard whispered and I smiled and went to take Seth to school and Get Rella out of Gerard’s hair for a while.

I got back with Rella and Phoenix was sat by the front door smiling away to his reflection in the mirror we had by the door.
“Nix.” Rella said and ran into Phoenix which made him fall on the floor which made him start to cry.
”Go careful Rella, Nix is only a baby and you can’t jump on him like you can with me, daddy and Seth.” I said as I picked Phoenix up and Gerard walked round the corner.
”What happened?” Gerard asked.
”Rella Thought Nix was big enough to have a rough and tumble with.” I said and looked at Phoenix who was just whimpering now.
”He’s not quite big enough for that baby.” Gerard said as he picked Rella up and kissed the side of her head which Rella rested her head on his shoulder.
”So, what does it say?” I asked and walked over to Gerard.
”Two pink lines, you know what that means.” Gerard said and I looked at him.
”Jesus Frank Seriously? We have 2 kids and yet you don’t know what two pink lines mean?” Gerard said and I carried on looking at him.
”We need a bigger house Frank, this place is going to be too small in 9 months.” Gerard said.
”Your going to have a little brother or sister Nix.” I said happily and kissed Gerard and smiled at him.
”Don’t Get to over excited, a lot can still happen between now and when it’s going to be okay.” Gerard said sadly as he put Rella down and she looked at him.
”Dada.” Rella said and Gerard smiled at her.
”Go and play. I’ll be with you in second.” Gerard said.
”Juice?” Rella asked and Gerard smiled again.
”I’ll go and get it for you baby.” I said and Gerard looked at me as I put Phoenix down on the floor and he started to crawl off with Rella showing him the ropes.
Gerard went to the kitchen and made Rella’s drink.

”Baby Talk to me.” I said quietly and Gerard sighed.
”I’m scared.” Gerard whispered and I looked at him as he looked down.
”Why?” I asked as I stood next to him.
”I lost the last one, what if that’s my body telling me I can’t have anymore kids. I can’t go through and lose another baby Frank I just can’t. I manage to cope with the last one but I only just but if I lost another one it would kill me Frank.” Gerard said and a few tears rolled down his cheeks and I reached out and kissed the tear away which made Gerard look at me.
”Why didn’t you come and talk to me?” I asked.
”I don’t know how to open up to people. I was thinking about it the other day and then I saw you with the kids and I couldn’t bring myself to talk to you so I just went to the bathroom and had a shower and cried a little. I tell people what’s wrong and they leave, they always leave and I can’t take that risk of you leaving because you’ll either just go in the middle of the night or you’ll take the kids away from me.” Gerard said But was sobbing towards the end so I walked over and pulled him close to me and hugged him as I kissed the side of his head.
“You can tell me anything baby okay. I am here for you to talk to me and I am never going to leave you.” I said and stood back a little and got Gerard too look at me.
”You’ve got the key to my heart and you will always have that key Gee. I wouldn’t be a asshole and walk away unless nothing else can be done in this relationship until that spark between us is no longer around I will always be by your side. I wouldn’t get up in the middle of the night and leave nor will I take the kids away from you. I would always make sure that you are able to look after our children.” I said Amd Gerard sniffed and a few more tears fell and I kissed them away as Gerard wrapped his arms round my neck and hid his face into my neck.
”Please don’t ever leave me.” Gerard whispered into my neck.
”Never dream of it baby, it’s going to be me and you against the world.” I said and Gerard pulled back and looked at me with a smile as he looked down at his ring.
”Didn’t ask you to marry me for no reason. I honestly want to be with you until we’re both dead and then we can join each other when we go to hell.” I said and Gerard chuckled.
”I love you so much Frank.” Gerard said quietly and I pulled him close to me again.
”I love you too baby.” I said quietly and kissed him hard which made Gerard smile into the kiss.

”Dada.” Rella said and me and Gerard turned round to see Rella walking into the kitchen.
”What’s the matter?” I asked as Gerard picked her up.
“Juice.” Rella said and pointed to her cup behind Gerard.
”Sorry Baby, me and papa got talking and forgot about Juice.” Gerard said and gave Rella her juice.
”Nix is covered in poo.” Rella said after she had a drink.
”Is he now.” I said and Rella nodded.
”Yeah.” Rella said with a smile on her face and I looked at Gerard.
”Want me to clean him?” Gerard asked and I shook my head.
”Nope, I’ve got this.” I said and Gerard rolled his eyes.
”Babe, you don’t cope well with poo in a nappy let alone a child covered in poo.” Gerard said as he put Rella down on the floor and she caught hold of his leg.
”Need to learn to cope don’t I?” I said and walked off to the sitting room where I was greeted by Phoenix covered in shit and he had this smile on his face and he was laughing.
”Jesus fucking Christ Nix.” I said as I picked him up and kept him at arms length rushing to the bathroom gagging loudly and all I could hear was Gerard laughing at me.

Rella and Phoenix was in bed and me and Gerard was spending some time with Seth and watched a Disney film like we always did before Seth went to bed.
Gerard had his head on my lap as I ran my fingers through his hair and Seth was sat in the gap between the sofa and Gerard with his feet on Gerard’s stomach.
”Why do you have a ring on your finger daddy? It wasn’t there before.” Seth said as he moved and lent on Gerard which made Gerard smile.
”Papa has asked me if I wanted to marry him.” Gerard said as he sat up and lent into my side as Seth climbed onto himself lap.
”Does this mean you said yes?” Seth asked and looked at Gerard’s ring.
”That’s exactly what it means.” Gerard said as brought his hand up so Seth could have a closer look at it and Seth smiled a little as he looked.
”Is this because you love daddy so much?” Seth asked me as he looked at me.
”Yeah, I love daddy and you kids to the moon and back and maybe a bit more beyond.” I said and Seth smiled wide and he climbed onto my lap and hugged me.
”I love you and daddy to the moon and back as well.” Seth said quietly which made me smile.
”You going to be okay to put little man to bed, I want to do some drawing.” Gerard said and I nodded and looked at him.
”Yeah that’s fine Gee.” I said.
”I want to draw too.” Seth said.
”It’s a little too late now to draw baby, how about tomorrow me and you can go drawing together.” Gerard said and Seth nodded.
“Put me to bed daddy.” Seth said and looked at Gerard.
“Don’t you want to watch the rest of the film?” Gerard asked and Seth shook his head.
”Come on then.” Gerard said as he got up and turned round.
”Say night night to papa and give him a kiss.” Gerard said and Seth gave me a hug and a kiss like normal.
”Night night papa.” Seth said as Gerard picked him up.
”Night night little man.” I said and Gerard went to put him to bed as I tidy up and make myself and Gerard a hot chocolate.

”You didn’t have to do that.” Gerard said as he walked back into the sitting room where me and Gerard got comfy and started to watch this new show on Netflix we both liked the look off.
”Well I did, you need to start looking after yourself, it’s not just you anymore.” I said and Gerard looked at me with a frown.
”You have to look after bubba now.” I said and put my hand on Gerard stomach and he sighed loudly.
”Can we just wait until we get past the safety net before we start calling it a baby and all that.” Gerard said sadly as he looked down.
”Babe.” I said and Gerard shook his head and stood up.
”Baby what’s wrong.” I said and Gerard looked at me.
”Just don’t get your hopes up okay, something could happen and I could lose the baby. Please don’t get your hopes up Frank.” Gerard said quietly and he walked off and I heard our bedroom door shut and I sighed loudly and got up turning the tv off and went back into our room.
I heard Gerard cry in our bathroom and I walked in and saw Gerard crawled up on the floor under the hot water and was hugging his knees.
I stripped down to my pants and walked over to the shower and sat onto the floor and pulled Gerard onto My lap where he kept on crying.
”Babe you have to talk to me, I’m getting worried about you now.” I said quietly and Gerard shook his head.
”You don’t have to speak but just know that I am here and I will listen to you and I promise you I won’t run. I love you too much too lose you now.” I said and Gerard nodded.
”Just hold me.” Gerard whispered and I nodded and kissed the top of his head.
”I can help you shower if you want.” I said and Gerard looked at me and nodded.
”Up you get then, I’ll help you shower.” I said quietly and Gerard moved and he got up and watched me do the same and I pulled him close to me.
”Promise me that you’ll be okay when the baby gets past that safety net. That you’ll be happy about being pregnant again.” I said and Gerard looked at me.
”I’m just worried Okay. I just don’t want to lose our baby.” Gerard said quietly and I kissed him softly.
“You won’t lose it okay, I’m going to look after you like I have done with with all your other ones. You don’t stress and enjoy the next 9 months of me running after the kids.” I said and Gerard smiled.
“I love you so much.” I said quietly and Gerard hid his face in my neck.
”I love you too.” Gerard whispered and kissed my neck.

Gerard was fast asleep cuddled into my side and I was watching tv since I couldn’t get to sleep when someone came into the room.
“Dada.” Rella said as she walked over to our bed.
”Dada is asleep but I’m awake.” I said and moved which made Gerard sigh loudly and he rolled away from me and I picked Rella up and sat her on my lap.
”What’s the matter Baby?” I asked and Rella lead down on my chest and I pulled the covers over me and her and I checked Gerard who had covers so I left him alone.
”Monsters.” Rella said and she looked at my tattoos.
”You don’t have to worry about the monsters now, me and Dada will keep them away.” I said and Rella looked at me and I kissed the top of her head.
Rella turned her head and looked at Gerard who was on his front facing away from us.
”Dada sleep.” Rella said.
”Yeah dada I said asleep, why don’t you settle down and go to sleep as well.” I said and Rella nodded and got comfy on my chest.
”But monsters.” Rella said quietly.
”The monsters have to get past me first.” I said quietly and wrapped an arm round her.
”I love you so much.” I whispered and messed her fair and I felt her breaths even out and I checked and she was asleep and I felt Gerard move and he rolled over to face me and moved closer to me but he stayed asleep.
I got myself comfy and fell asleep as well.

Notes