Until My Heart Explodes.

Frank gently set his bowl of cereal at the kitchen bar. He scooted the bar stool closer to the bar before sitting down. He was so hungry. He probably shouldn’t have lit up before getting out of bed. Now all he wanted was to eat. He knew Ray was going to get after him for not waking up alert and attentive. Today was supposed to be first day back in studio. He didn’t know how that was supposed to work since Gerard just came home the night before.

“We’re just going to talk to the producer, let him hear some of tunes we do have, and go. We don’t have to discuss Gee at all.” Ray had said to him when he had come in after arguing with Spencer.

“How are we not supposed to talk about Gerard?” Frank had asked. “He is the fucking leader of the band.” He said this with an eye roll. Ray ignored him and sent him to his room as if he were some child. Sometimes being the youngest had its disadvantages.

Frank was lost in concentrating on his breakfast that seeing Spencer stroll into the kitchen almost gave him a fright. He caught the balance on his spoon to keep it from crashing down into his bowl. Spencer had a newspaper in front of her face. She had on her nerd glasses; big, black horn-rimmed glasses that she used to read up close.

He watched as she grabbed a mug from the kitchen sink and poured herself some coffee that he had made before his cereal. She made her coffee the way she liked it all without looking away from her paper. Frank tried to make up what she was reading. He figured it was the classified ads from all the squares and bold lettering. Spencer leaned back casually onto the counter. She was facing Frank, but he didn’t think she noticed him.

She was wearing his zebra boxer shorts. He glared at her. He’d been looking for them since they had got off tour. He should have known. She was also wearing one of Mikey’s shirts. A faded Anthrax shirt with a hole towards the bottom of the shirt. The shirt was thin enough to make out her nipples and nipple piercings. Frank stared a little too long and felt himself get a stiff one. He looked down at the front of his jeans. He narrowed his eyes at his crotch.

He hated his body for betraying him. But he knew he couldn’t help it.

Spencer was not like any girl he had ever been with. Her confidence and self-esteem blew through the roof. She knew she looked good, but wasn’t cocky about it. It was one of the things that drew Frank to her. Also the fact that she was a sex goddess in bed. Frank’s mind wandered to all the places they’d fucked. Her naked body imaged in his mind. If only he could have her just one more time…

His mind suddenly darted to Jamia. Guilt filled his conscience. He sighed heavily. Jamia was a pretty girl and underneath the baggy clothes, her body was fantastic. But she lacked confidence. Their sex life wasn’t all that either. Missionary and occasional cowboy was all for them. Other than that, he could say he was pretty okay with their relationship…

“Hey!”

Frank blinked furiously, focusing on the subject in front of him. Her voice sounded so far away, but her face was right in front of his.

“You okay? You were spaced out for like five minutes staring at my tits.” Spencer said. Frank smirked.

“Thinking about the last time we—“

Spencer cut him off by directing his cereal spoon into his mouth. He chewed fast with annoyance.

“Let’s not talk about that.” She said quickly just as Bob entered the kitchen. He grunted a good morning to the both of them. Frank met eyes with Spencer. Her hazel eyes had grown dark, meaning she was shut off, closed down, serious mode. Frank didn’t like it when she was that way. It was like she was one person with him and another with the band as a whole. Frank figured it was because she didn’t know Bob, but it had to be something else because she had derailed him quickly.

“Hey Bob…” Spencer began, putting her mug into the sink and placing her classified ads under an arm. Bob’s eyes widened at her. Frank didn’t understand why. “I kinda wanted to apologize for last night. Being rude and… uhh, yeah. That. Umm, thanks for letting me take your room. I know it’s hard giving up a bed when you’ve been on tour and shit.”

Frank and Bob looked at one another. Bob placed a hand on Spencer’s shoulder and gave it a small squeeze.

“No problem, kid.” He said. She gave him a weak smile and stepped back from his touch. Her eyes flitted to Frank for a brief second before announcing that she had to get ready.

“For?” Bob asked. She held up the newspaper to him.

“A job. There are some law firms hiring. Thought I’d check them out before I head back to Massachusetts.” She said, already at the kitchen entryway. She leaned against the wall.

“If you already graduated, why are you going back?” Frank asked hastily. She had just graduated before the summer and when tour ended, she made a mad dash back to Harvard. He never asked her why, but by then he was already occupied with Jamia.

“Zack.” She said as if it were so obvious. Frank sneered.

“Are you really going to use him as an excuse?” he asked her coldly. He felt Bob come up beside him and Spencer retreated. She didn’t even look back at him as she walked away.

“I think you really hurt her, Frank.” Bob whispered. Frank looked up at the blond fellow. He scoffed.

“Maybe she really hurt me.”

Notes

i added a bit to the end of chapter 2 since i hadn't noticed that the whole chapter hadn't pasted. enjoy.