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All We Need is Daylight

Changes

Frank wakes up to the world much the same as it always has been. Of course, he’s unaware of what Gerard discovered last night, so his life is the same as always. It’s normal, or whatever you can call Frank’s small little excuse for normal anyway.

Frank looks around, sees Ray sleeping down on the bed below him, like a dog, or a sack of bricks. Luckily, he doesn’t snore. He does have the occasional snore when he’s in a deep sleep, a particularly loud one woke Frank up a week or two ago, and he decided that if Ray had woken him up, he’d wake Ray up, so he threw a sock at his face.

It’s too late to be considered morning, and Frank’s surprised Ray’s still asleep, the whole world has woken up before the two of them. Frank owes it to the fact that he was out all night, with Gerard and then at the ice rink. By the time he’d come back from the ice rink last night, Ray had already come home and fallen asleep, so he doesn’t have an excuse. Frank doesn’t want to wake him up though, not on a weekend at least.

There’s that dismal Sunday gloom in the atmosphere that Frank is used to. It’s a very unpleasant feeling, not incomparable to the feeling you’d get waking up the day of your scheduled execution, and Frank frowns when he glares at the floor beneath him. He’s got a whole day left of the weekend, and yet it seems like it’s already over.

Nevertheless, Frank pulls himself out of bed, nearly falls flat on his face as he climbs out of his bed, which he’s sure is getting taller every time he climbs in or out of it. Frank dresses quickly, not entirely sure what he’s going to be doing with today, but sure that he doesn’t want to just sit inside all day.

Frank’s not entirely sure what date it actually is. He knows his birthday is coming up in a matter of days, however he has neither brought this up with his teammates, nor does he intend to. Frank’s birthdays are always modest, the only time he’s ever announced his birthday to anyone is when he’s sitting at a restaurant and wants his free dessert, which is an annual tradition that he intends to collect on again this year. Maybe he’ll tell Gerard, or Pete. He might even get an actual present from someone as opposed to the ones he gets from his mom, grandma, and aunt.

Frank gets a little giddy thinking about Gerard giving him a present, because he knows, just knows, Gerard would probably buy him a Captain America bobblehead or a Wonder Woman action figure, or something else equally as dorky. Then again, Gerard’s got that Star Wars sort of vibe to him, and although Frank has yet to confirm it, he’s fairly sure that Gerard could probably name all of the planets in the Star Wars universe. This is something they could easily bond over.

Pete’s the kind of guy who would buy someone a novelty mug for their birthday.

After stubbing his foot on his desk, hopping around and cussing silently to himself, and then whining a little bit when it continues to throb, Frank finally leaves his room. He makes for the front door mindlessly, his eyes on the carpet, tracing the patterns with his eyes as he steps over them.

At the very least, what he’ll do with the next few hours is convince someone to walk around town with him so he can actually start to get to know his surroundings. Frank is not entirely sure what is even in town, because so far he has not stepped more than about a hundred feet of campus. Gerard’s apartment was the furthest he’s been in town apart from when he got here from the airport, but everything had been dark and gloomy then so Frank still doesn’t really know what’s around town. He does know it’s a cute, small little place with few chains, mostly mom and pop stores.

Frank steps outside of the dorm before actually looking around and he is very much surprised to be greeted by crunching under his feet. He looks down to see that somehow, overnight, snow had begun to fall, and when he looks up he notices the tiny, wet snowflakes falling down around him. They’re the kind that aren’t likely to stick, and melt away the second they touch anything besides more snow. Frank looks up at the sky above him though, a dazzling white to match the snow falling from it, and he smiles contentedly to himself. Frank is awfully fond of snow, it makes the world a little quieter, a little more serene.

Frank prefers winter to summer, probably because he prefers being cold to being hot. He also just really likes the vibe of winter, it’s very soft and cozy and pleasant, as opposed to summers emphasis on having the most fun you can which makes it a competition that ultimately no one ends up winning. Frank vastly prefers winter break to summer break too, for obvious reasons. He loves the holidays, but he also just really loves drinking hot cocoa, wearing warm sweaters, spending time with his mom, and watching winter movies on the Family channel.

Now if there’s anything Frank prefers to the winter holidays, it’s Halloween. Frank may not celebrate his birthday very extravagantly, but he sure as fuck celebrates Halloween. It’s just a complete coincidence that they fall on the same day of the year.

Everything about Halloween is amazing. The horror movies, the dressing up, the pumpkin spice lattes, the general macabre that happens to creep around every corner of the world. Frank’s never really gotten to celebrate Halloween with anyone, though.

Back when he was a kid, Hayley would go trick or treating with him. She was his neighbor, and enough older than him for her to be responsible to take care of Frank so long as they were only a few blocks away from their houses. Hayley used to be the best at costumes, she always beat Frank, who was Han Solo for about four years in a row until he grew out of the vest.

Frank’s more than a little bit excited to actually see what Halloween will be like this year. It’ll be his first Halloween with friends, so it’s sure to be a night to remember. Especially the part where he follows Gerard wherever he goes.

Frank’s crush has gotten about three million times worse than it had been two days ago. He was infatuated with Gerard beyond comprehension two days ago, but after yesterday, Frank’s love for him has skyrocketed. Frank would let Gerard murder him if he asked. Frank would let Gerard step all over him, so he needs to be a little bit careful around the guy or he’ll end up just handing him his wallet.

Frank’s not paying attention to where he’s going, a dangerous habit of his that he can’t stop even if he tried. He looks up, at the still falling snow, to see Pete’s dorm in front of him. He shrugs and decides it’s as good a place as any, and makes his way into it. He passes by several people wearing various cozy looking hats which Frank wishes he had thought to bring, but he didn’t know that it was snowing at the time, so now he’s just got to live with that.

Frank walks the hall to Pete’s room, knocking on the door when he gets there, and hearing a familiar “come in” a moment later.

Frank opens the door to see Patrick, alone in the room looking down at his phone like he’s engrossed in something. It appears as though he’s being torn away when he looks up to see Frank, who smiles at him, and then looks around to see that the curtains on the window have been drawn to display the harsh white of the world outside.

“Hey, Frank,” Patrick says, in that voice of his that really reminds Frank of maple syrup for some reason. “What’s up?”

“Nothing,” Frank shrugs. “Just kind of… bored. Or, I don’t know, I’ve only been awake a little while, I don’t know what I’m doing today to begin with.”

“Oh, well Pete’s not here. He’s been at the library all weekend doing this huge paper, so he’s not going to be coming back anytime soon.”

“That’s fine,” Frank says, because he’s just as fine with Patrick’s company as anyone else’s. Now if it were up to him, he’d be with Gerard, but he’s also super self-conscious and doesn’t want to go running back to Gerard only a day after they’d spent the entire day together.

“Um, well, you know, we still have that article to do, if you want?” Patrick offers, and Frank has a sudden flash of memory. He’d almost entirely forgotten about Patrick’s article, it had completely slipped his mind.

“Oh, right,” Frank says, in a not entirely opposing voice, like he’s considering it genuinely. Patrick’s not sure if its ever going to happen, which he supposes is fine, but it’s something he’s been wanting to write for a year now, and he hasn’t gotten the chance or opportunity so it’s been a little bit of a bummer. He knows he’d be able to write a really inspiring, touching article if he were given the chance, but it hasn’t come up. Frank’s been a little impish about the whole thing, so he’s not entirely sure if it’s ever going to happen or if it’s more like a friend saying “we should hang out sometime” and then never talking to that friend again.

“It’s cool if you don’t want to, Frank, I mean it’s not that big of a deal, and-”

“You know what?” Frank says, when he thinks about it and considers the completely empty schedule he’s got ahead of him today. “Yeah, actually. We should, I’ve got the whole day free, why not?”

“Really?” Patrick asks, looking excited. His ears perking up as he looks eagerly at Frank, like a puppy who just heard the word “walk.”

“Yeah,” Frank says, nodding, and actually looking somewhat eager, not necessarily excited but the best one could hope for.

“Okay, yeah, yes,” Patrick says, standing up and walking over to his desk to grab his computer. Frank grabs the chair at Pete’s desk, pulls it out and spins it around so that he can actually look at Patrick who busies himself loading the computer up.

There’s really not much prelude, quite a bit of uncomfortable tension and the sound of a trackpad clicking, and then Patrick’s looking up at Frank, concern evident in his eyes. He’s a little wary about this whole thing, nervous that Frank’s going to end up regretting this decision.

“Frank, are you sure you want to do this?” Patrick asks.

“Pretty sure.”

“Pretty sure? Frank, I’m going to need you to be a hundred percent positive if you want to go through with this.”

“I know, I know,” Frank says, “I want to. I do.”

“Are you sure? Because you don’t have to. You don’t owe it to anyone to do this, the decision is entirely yours. Not mine, not ours, yours.”

“I know,” Frank says. “But I think it’s the right thing to do. Even if no one empathizes with it, you get one hell of an article out of it. It might even be publicity for the team, which we need. No one comes to see us.”

“But I just don’t want you to regret doing this,” Patrick says.

“I won’t,” Frank nods, “as long as it’s kept completely anonymous. I’m not, I mean, I can’t be the only gay hockey player there is. I know I’m not even the only one on the team. What if there are other people, in other sports? What if my mere existence might be able to help them? I just, I have to try. I have to. For Pete.”

“For Pete,” Patrick repeats to himself.

“That’s the reason you asked me to do this article, isn’t it? You want to help Pete. You want to help others like Pete.”

“Yeah,” Patrick says. “I just want people to not feel so alone. Pete’s just, he’s so broken, I don’t think you fully understand. It breaks my heart, breaks it in two. I love Pete. I love him so much, so beyond words. I just want him and other people like him, like us, really, to not feel like they’re fighting a war all on their own.”

“That’s why I want to do this. Because of everything you just said,” Frank replies, and then Patrick nods, finally looking like he’s convinced of Frank’s assuredness.

Frank isn’t as sure about this as he is making himself seem. He’s very nervous, unbelievably, irreparably so. But Pete is probably his best friend, as much as he likes the rest of the guys at this school. Pete’s the one who’s company makes him feel the most alive, other than Gerard, who he’s mostly too nervous to hang out with. Frank just wants to help people, like Pete, like himself, like Patrick. There’s so many of them, so many of him, and it’s not fair that they’re all in the dark.

“Okay,” Patrick nods, and he takes a deep breath. “Are you ready to start then?”

“Yeah,” Frank nods.

“Alright,” Patrick says, looking down at the computer on his lap. A little while ago when they talked about the article, Frank had refused to allow Patrick to record the interview. It’s not because he doesn’t trust Patrick to keep that recording only to himself, but because people lose things all the times, and it’s incredibly easy to break into a dorm room once you’re in the building. Morgan lives in this hall. Frank knows it’s irrational, but the mere thought of a recording of Frank admitting he’s gay being in such close proximity to Morgan wigs him out. Morgan would have no reason to suspect such a thing exists, but Frank’s still not willing to incriminate himself.

Part of Frank is slightly worried that Pete might come back to the room sometime soon, even though Patrick assured him that Pete was at the library trying to get a huge paper done. He could still come back. Even if he does, they don’t have to tell him what they were doing. Frank does still intend to tell Pete eventually, that time just hasn’t come quite yet.

“Alright, are you ready?” Patrick asks, and Frank nods. “Okay first question, here we go. I’m going to get some background about you before we get into any specifics, if that’s alright. I obviously won’t publish anything that might even kind of lead people to believe it’s you, not age, not grade, not hometown, not anything like that. I just, for my question, would like for you to tell me how long you’ve known you were gay?”

“Um, well,” Frank starts, thinking back. Come to think of it, Frank never had a moment where it clicked for him. He never had anything like that, there was no eureka moment. He also can’t remember not knowing. It’s almost like he’s always known, or that he never considered that he wasn’t. He doesn’t remember ever thinking he’s straight. “It kind of has been something I’ve always known, and not, like, in the back of my mind or anything like you hear people say sometimes. I’ve just, like always known. From when I was a kid to now, it’s just been a fact about me that has always been true. Like, I’m pretty sure the first crush I ever had was on another boy and it was in about fifth grade. I think that was about the time when I realized that liking boys wasn’t the socially accepted thing to do, so I guess if anything, my answer is fifth grade, that’s when I knew. Before then, I didn’t know that I was anything other than human, it was right about then that I realized that being gay was even a thing.”

Patrick nods, and then types away furiously, trying to keep time with Frank as he’s speaking. There’s a minute of silence with just the sound of a keyboard clicking as Frank waits for him to write Frank’s response, before Patrick is nodding and then looking at the screen to find the next question.

“Okay, I know the answer to this, but I’d like it in your own words. Does anyone know you’re gay? And remember, Frank, that I’m going to be telling the public that I don’t even know your identity so you can feel free to say that no one knows, not even me.”

“Alright,” Frank nods. He thinks about Hayley, but decides that he doesn’t want to describe her, because of the fact that she’s not related to him. It sounds kind of precarious for him to say a childhood friend when everyone knows he’s still in contact with Hayley, who is a childhood friend. He doesn’t want that to lead anyone to him. “No one knows. Not my family, not anyone. Not a single soul.”

“And why is that?”

“Because I’m afraid,” Frank says. “I’m absolutely petrified of people finding out. I don’t want anyone to judge me based on that. I don’t want that to be my master status, I don’t want to be the gay dude, I just don’t want that to be who I am in other people’s eyes. I’m also, like terrified of the negativity. So many people don’t care, and that means a lot, it does, but however many people as that may be, it doesn’t change the fact that there are some people who aren’t okay with it, who would vilify me just for who I am. It scares me, you know. There are people, people at this very school, who would see my head on a pike before allowing me to so much as date someone I like, and that scares me. It terrifies me to not be universally accepted, because straight people are all accepted for who they love. No one has a problem with them, but it’s different for me. Because when no one knows, I am accepted. Everyone accepts me, even if they don’t like me, they don’t ostracize me because of a preconceived prejudice, I am the same as all straight people if no one knows. If people do know, though, everyone will know I’m gay, and I’ll start to be a little bit less of a person in their eyes. Especially in the eyes of people who aren’t okay with it.”

Patrick nods, and Frank stops talking when he can sense that Patrick’s having trouble keeping in time with him. He waits, looks back at Patrick patiently. Finally, Patrick types the last few words and moves on to the next question.

“Have you ever witnessed or experienced any homophobia firsthand?” Patrick asks.

“Well, I’m on a hockey team. I share a locker room with a bunch of other guys, who love to use gay as an insult, who make offensive jokes about gay people, and who make being gay a bad thing. They never cease to insult each other by insinuating that someone else is gay. I just have to laugh along with it and pretend that it doesn’t offend me. Because like, being gay isn’t bad, but for the entire time I’ve played hockey I’ve had to face that fact that people use it as the ultimate diss. Calling someone else gay is basically the same as calling them less than human, calling them worse than everyone else. It makes me feel like garbage. I feel unwanted by my own team, and I shouldn’t have to feel that about a team. A team is meant to be about togetherness, yet I feel like I’m being kicked apart at every turn, and there’s nothing I can do about it. It hurts. It’s painful. It’s a personal attack, and they don’t know it. If they did, though, there’s a good chance things would get worse. There’s an incredibly huge chance I’d have to quit the team. Because being gay and playing sports don’t go together. You’re not allowed to be both. And I have to say it’s not fair. I wish I didn’t have to sacrifice my personality for doing something that I love.”

“So, to you, what does it mean to be a gay hockey player?”

“It means that no matter how good I am at the game and how hard I work at it, the team won’t ever accept me. That’s why I can’t tell them the truth. I’d rather be a closeted hockey player for the rest of my life and completely dominate at the game, then to be an out ex-player whose dreams were squashed.”

“Do you think you’ll ever come out publicly?” Patrick asks. Frank has to think about that one for a spell. He’s never considered being out publicly with any practicality. He’s never imagined it realistically at all. He’s only ever imagined what he would like for things to be. But he’s never considered actually doing it. He doesn’t know how he feels about the idea of it.

On the one hand, Frank would love to be out, to not have to hide in the shadows. To maybe find a boyfriend for once in his life and then get to be proud about it. But on the other hand, he can’t really have both, or at least, not in the current climate.

“I think, maybe in the future if the world gets a little less cruel about being gay. If people are less prejudice about it, I think I will come out. If I feel that I can, that is. If I ever feel like I’m in a place where I can have the best of both worlds, being out and being a hockey player, then I will. But until then, it’s unrealistic. The world I live in now won’t allow for me to exist in it as both a hockey player and a gay man. So, until the day comes when I can tell the world, I will remain in the closet. Sad thing is that it’s not for my sake, it’s so that the guys I play with can keep their fragile masculinity in tact.”

“What do you hope that this article will prove?” Patrick asks.

“Well, mainly, I want people to know I’m here. I want people to think twice about their straight goggles. Everyone assumes that everyone on the team is straight because no one has ever said that they’re not, and in the eyes of everyone around us, straight is the default. Being straight is just assumed. I don’t want to reveal my name, but I want people to know that they’re wrong. I want them to reconsider the way they see the world. I am out here. I am here, and I am fighting, and I will not stop fighting until the day I die. And I am not the only one. Don’t assume we’re all straight just because no one’s said otherwise. And I want people to take that information and carry it into other sports, other activities, other walks of life, eventually into our everyday lives. I want people to know that not everyone is straight, and you need to start treating people that way. Like, the guys who I share a locker room with, I want them and people like them, to know that they’re gay jokes are not going unheard by gay men. They’re being openly homophobic and that secret is not safe between other straight people. There are gay people all around you, and you need to grow up and start behaving accordingly.

I also want to maybe inspire all the other gay people on sports teams, or doing anything, really, who are afraid to come out, or who feel like they’re alone. I want them to know they’re not fighting a battle by themselves. And for the people who aren’t gay, I you to know that gay people all around you. I guarantee that someone you know is gay, and if they haven’t told you, it’s because they’re afraid of you. It’s never their fault that they don’t tell you, you’re always partially accountable. I know that I am not the only one. I am not the only gay person on this campus, let alone involved with a sport. We are all around, and so many of us feel the way I do. We feel rejected, hurt, alone, and just really broken because of who we are, and it’s not fair. It’s not fair that we have to go at it alone when there’s nothing wrong with us. We shouldn’t have to be alone when there’s hope to be spread. I would love to spread hope, or even just comfort. I know it would be comforting to me to know that there’s more gay people out there, so I hope that I can give that feeling to others.”

“Wow,” Patrick says, typing away as quick as he can, though he can’t write down every single one of Frank’s words. He absolutely would if he could, Frank’s almost got a way with words. Almost. He’s just a little off the mark, but he’s damn good at just speaking. He’d probably be a boss at poetry.

Frank blushes, feeling like a blabbermouth. He sometimes has word vomit that he can’t prevent from saying, which has gotten him in trouble a few times. At least he’s good at keeping secrets though, because otherwise his life would be a whole lot more difficult than it needs to be.

“So what’s your next question?” Frank asks.

“Uh, well, honestly I’ve covered most of the questions I have. The article is going to be pretty long, anymore and I’ll have to torture myself trying to cut it down to size,” Patrick says, which Frank infers as Patrick calling him a windbag that doesn’t shut up. He turns a little brighter shade of red than he already had been and then feels a little bit ashamed of himself.

“It’s going to be good, I can tell you that much. This article is going to blow up the entire school, it’ll be great.”

“I hope it does something,” Frank shrugs, “Doesn’t just sit there at the bottom of a column under an ad for a mop.”

“It’ll get attention, trust me,” Patrick says, “my editor says that there are just some headlines that blow up, and when you’ve got a secret and an anonymous interview together, holy crap, all hell is gonna break loose. But hopefully it’ll be good. Good attention, I don’t see how it could be anything but. I mean, yeah a few people are going to be upset about their being a gay guy, namely, the rest of the hockey players, but I think it’s finally going to give you and Pete, and everyone else, the attention you deserve. You get the attention and the recognition without having to risk your place on the team.”

“Everything’s going to change after this gets published, isn’t it?” Frank asks.

Patrick shrugs, but then considers the question some more and realizes that Frank might be right. Everything is going to change. It’s not like people don’t know that there’s gay people around them, it’s just easy to pretend there aren’t when no one publicizes it. This article will disprove that notion. It’ll force them to start seeing that the world isn’t as black and white as they have come to believe. There are people all around them, even on sports teams, who aren’t straight. Facing that fact is not a task lightly taken on. It’s quite a huge feat. Frank being a single anonymous hockey player who’s gay conjures up an entire world of potentially gay people. This school needs that. It needs a breath of fresh air for people like Frank. People who feel marginalized just because of who they are.

Frank wants to change the world. He wants to be the best goddamn hockey player the world has ever seen. Frank doesn’t want to just be as good as Gretzky, he wants to be better. He wants to take on the world, change it for the better, leave his mark and make sure his name will be remembered for eons. This article, even if his name isn’t attached to it, it’s a stepping stone to that goal. Frank wants to change the world in any way that he can, and this article just might be his way of doing it. Sometimes he thinks being gay is the easier way of going about change then being a hockey player. Being both, he has the potential to make history, but he doesn’t want to find his mark in history that way. Or at least, he doesn’t want that yet.

“Alright, so since I just interviewed you, I mean I guess I owe you something in return, don’t I?”

“Um, not necessarily,” Frank replies. He had agreed to be interviewed, Patrick never did.

“Well, I’ll tell you a story anyway,” Patrick says. “Okay, so you know I’m bi, right? Well I didn’t know until… well until Pete came along. When Pete entered my life, honestly, I didn’t know what was happening, who I was, if I even was myself anymore. I just knew that everything felt different after him. I didn’t feel like myself, and it took me a few months to realize that it wasn’t that I didn’t feel like myself, the problem was that I never had felt like myself until I met him. Or at least, I didn’t feel like I was truly myself until I knew who I really was. I was, I am finally myself with Pete, and all the time before him was just me being in denial, I think. It really took Pete’s arrival for me to come to terms with who I was. And now that I do know, honestly, I want to shout it from the rooftop, I want everyone to know. It’s not something I’m ashamed of or anything I feel needs to be kept secret. I do keep it a secret for Pete, because he’s got the same worries as you, but it’s not because I’m ashamed. I don’t ever think I’ll be ashamed of myself, not for this at least. I like guys, so what? Big deal. The truth is that it’s not a big deal, not unless you choose to make it one.

“And the thing is, with Pete, I feel really safe. I feel loved, I feel wanted, and content and it doesn’t feel like two halves of my personality are warring with each other anymore. Even though it’s still a secret, something that I have to keep between myself and Pete, and now you, it doesn’t really feel that way. Sure, it sucks not to be able to call him my boyfriend or tell people I even have a boyfriend, but like, at the same time, it’s worth it because I have Pete anyway. Even if no one knows, I still have him. He’s still mine, and I still love him. Validation isn’t necessary as long as I know what it is that I have, and with Pete, what I have is the entire world.”

“Why are you telling me this?” Frank asks.

“Because it’s something for you to think about. Something for you to consider about… oh you know, anyone who you might like,” Patrick says, and though he doesn’t say the words, Frank gets a feeling that he knows that Frank’s got someone. He probably doesn’t know it’s Gerard, because if he did know he’d also know that Frank hasn’t got a chance with him, but Patrick definitely knows something.

Frank doesn’t feel like he needs to give Patrick’s words a response, because he doesn’t think he wants Patrick to know it’s Gerard who he likes. He doesn’t need any one’s sympathies or condolences. He knows that he can’t ever have Gerard, he doesn’t need someone close to him, like Patrick, to remind him of that. With Hayley, he can talk about Gerard to his heart’s content and she won’t judge him for how he feels, because she doesn’t really know Gerard to begin with. Hayley might believe he stands a chance. If Patrick were to know, he’d just know how helpless Frank’s crush is, and Frank doesn’t think he can bear that.

Frank doesn’t get much sleep that night. He’s too busy thinking about what might happen tomorrow when the article goes live. Patrick said he doesn’t want to prolong it, doesn’t want to have to push it off. It’s going live tomorrow. Frank’s entire world is going to change tomorrow. He doesn’t know if he’s ready for it.

Frank doesn’t know what might actually change, but he’s expecting things to be dramatically different. Nothing is going to be the same after tomorrow. Frank might have just ruined his own life, but he doesn’t think so. There’s sixteen guys on the team, sixteen is a big number. There’s a lot of guys to choose from, which makes picking out the gay guy extremely difficult. Though, to be fair, it’s not a one in sixteen shot that someone will guess it right, it’s a two in sixteen shot. Frank’s not putting just himself on the line here. He could’ve just majorly ruined Pete’s life too.

That’s a risk he’s terrified of. There’s a lot of risk to this. Though it would be world ending, Frank would rather have his own career and life ruined than have accidentally ruined Pete’s life. He just can’t let that happen. Pete doesn’t deserve to take the fall for what Frank did. Frank supposes that if anyone ever does suspect Pete, he’ll take the blame, cover for him. It’s the least he can do if Pete is put in the firing line. If it’s not his fault, Pete doesn’t deserve to take the grunt of it.

Frank hopes it doesn’t come to that. He thinks that the gains outweigh the risks, even if he doesn’t see them himself. He’s just nervous for the world he’s going to wake up to tomorrow.

Notes

Time to buckle your seat belt. Please leave a comment.

Comments

life is too short to not read every single frerard fanfic you can find

trashcore trashcore
4/8/19

@Helena Hathaway
sorry, i may have phrased that wrong. i love the story and i can't wait for the next update.

@kobra-poison-ghoul
there was literally an update a week ago

best fic I've ever read! is there ever going to be an update?

This is one of the only fics I read anymore! I can’t wait for the update :)

Zero percentile Zero percentile
5/22/18