Friday 22nd March 2013.

Ray threw me a cupcake. God! It tasted like diabetes, in the best way possible. I kept glancing away from watching some weird shit about Shinigamis on the Tv and turned to look at Ray and James who were snuggled up together. So fucking cute. The way that they love each other and hold each other. The way that they care for each other. The way that they support one other. I'm jealous, okay?

No! No! No! Not because I want to go out with one of them. Ugh! No, no offence but that would be a bit gross, like they're just my friends. But I want that too. I want to snuggle with him and I want him to love me back but he hardly ever notices me. What's the point in even asking him? He'll never say yes any way. But there's always a chance. My love for Frank has been boiling inside of me for years now! Years! He's grown on me, like he was okay at the beginning but now he's just....he's just perfect.

I suppose that I must have got caught up watching something on tv out because when I looked up Gee had disappeared off upstairs. I'm not really sure why. But I don't really care. As long as Frank is okay. Yes. As long as he is happy, then I am happy. Just like how Ray and James are. As cute as a kitten wearing a Christmas hat. Which is pretty cute unless you're like allergic to cats....or Christmas...or hats. But that would be pretty shit if you were. Right? Anyway.

Oh. Sorry, Ray. I looked embarrassed as I seemed to have been staring at him while my thoughts swam through my mind. Oh, fuck. He'll think that I'm a right creep.

"Sorry..." I whispered under my breath but too quiet for him to hear. But the truth was that I needed to tell them. They must know or I think that I might just explode. I mean about me liking Frank. Then I'll tell Gee, then last but by no means least I'll tell Frankie. And just cross my fingers and hope that I don't get humiliated.

"Guys... There's something that I must tell you....." I muttered quietly, my hands beginning to sweat.

"Yeah....okay Mikes?" Ray replied, trying to comfort me and make me feel less nervous.

"Well okay then." I took a deep breath. I'll tell you....." Well, I had myself in for it now, didn't I? I had to tell them now! I continued. "But you have to PROMISE to never mention this to Frank! Okay?!" Yeah, I wanted to tell him myself.

Ray and James looked at each other with raised eyebrows, "yeah of course" they chorused.

"Okay..." I began, preparing my mini speech while hoping that they'd both understand and wouldn't mock me, "well the thing is tha-"

Of course I was cut off by a scream. Can't get it out and tell Ray and James when Gee's not there to probably make fun of his little brother and his iccle wiccle crush. And of course the scream belonged to Gerard. Of course. He's so fucking annoying sometimes, but I guess that that's what brothers are for even if I can never get a word in edge ways with him around.

They almost fell down the stairs and crashed into the room. Frank smiling and looking so different from his zombie like expression that he'd been wearing for the past week or so. Gerard was smiling too as he held onto Frank's hand tightly. Wait, he was holding Frank's hand and smiling. What the actual fuckity fuck was happening?!

"And????!" Asked Ray.

"What's happening?" I asked, I suppose a hint of anger crept through my voice. But it was all so confusing.

"Come on.... Tell us....." James said, trying to unravel this weird ass confusing situation.

"You can't keep it a secret for much longe-" cut in Ray.

"ME and frank go out!!" Gee screamed to us all excitedly. I swear that my mouth dropped open and I stared at my older brother.

NO!
HOW COULD YOU DO THIS?!!!!
NO!!
YOU CAN'T JUS-
YOU CAN'T JUST TAKE HIM FROM ME!!
NOT NOW!
NOT EVER!
WHY WOULD YOU DO THI-

I didn't even wait around to see him and Frank make out in front of us all. I stormed out of the room to try and stop me from him hitting him out of anger and jealousy. From hitting my brother. I stormed out the house and gasped as the freezing air hit my face which was dripping with sweat. I felt the pain in my chest as the ice, which latched onto the air, seemed to sink to the bottom of my lungs. But I ran. I just ran. Until I was as far away as possible. Far away from my worst fears. From my perfect human of a crush who was my own brothers lover.

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When did I return?! I don't fucking know!!!! And you know what?! I don't even care, anymore?! Non of them are even bothered that I'm not there!!! No! They probably didn't even fucking notice?! I could have been gone for days and they wouldn't even notice!! No! They've all got someone! Think about it: James has Ray. And now Gerard has Frank. And then there's me....just me. All by myself. Alone. Alone, when I was surrounded by 5 so-called friends who just ignored me. All the time. It's time that they knew how I felt. I walked back to the house and rapped on the door.
Wait! I live here! I don't need to knock. I threw open the door to see Gerard stood there, still smiling. Fuckface!

"Hey....Mikes! Little bro! How ya doing?!" He asked.

"How am I doing?! I'm doing fucking fine thanks Gee!!! YEAH! Why else wouldn't I be fine?!"

"Hey, calm it...calm. What's wrong?!"
"I'll tell you what's wrong! You!!!" I grabbed his shirt and threw him to the floor. "YOU!! You ruined everything that I had! EVERYTHING!!!"

Notes

Hiya. Hope this chapter was okay and that you enjoy. Happy new year!! And all that shit! Yay! 2017!
ayway, not really sure when the last chapter will be up but hopefully before the end of the week. Not saying much other than: the last chapters from James' p.o.v and gets pretty tense.
Thanks for reading this crap! :) x