There are no amount of words that could ever quantify the exhaustion I experienced at that moment. Everything hurt, my knuckles, my butt, my arms, my legs, my feet, everything. My head was heavy too, like it was full of water, but my eyes were dry. I couldn’t stop blinking. Rows of trees, highways, signals and cars, it was all the same since 12 hours. I’ve seen the rise and fall of the sun and the cast of the moon. I’ve seen it all, I tell you. But now the morning was back and I couldn’t find my faith. I was sticky too, like damn sticky, hadn’t shower for days. This ride was just a mayhem of blood, sweat and tears. I was hot, and cold, sweating and shivering all at the same.

Anyway, it was 8 am now and I knew we were close, so damn close. I couldn’t give up now, no matter how much I wanted to. But then I saw them, those words, the ones I desperately longed for; New Jersey. Then the pain didn’t matter anymore, nor the daylight or the lack of sleep. I was finally there, home. I pushed the pedal harder, taking the exit on the right. Our van and the bus eventually parted ways. I followed the indications for Newark as they continued to Belleville. But none of us said goodbyes, I guess we were all too tired and eager to be home.

But little did they know, I didn’t need goodbyes anyway.

Our van sauntered the streets of my lost childhood, as memories from the past flashed before my eyes. My parents lived on a quiet street, the kinda street where nothing happens. With people who religiously cut their grass on saturdays, or go to church on sundays to confess crimes they didn’t commit. This, my friends, was the suburbs. The land of the phonies. With large driveways for their big cars, or symmetrical flowerbeds on their lawns. And then as you drive by, they all smile at you, white teeth and all. But it’s fake, so fake, it makes you sick in the stomach.

I could tell really, I know when people are being fake. And from all the fucked up shit I’ve seen lately, which god knows I’ve seen many, this place, this quiet place, was probably the sickest of them all.

I pulled in front of my parent’s house, body still in motion as the car finally stopped, as if the ground swayed below me, I swear. But nonetheless, I was happy and relieved. I didn’t move for a while, I just pressed my face against the steering wheel, breathing raggedly. But that’s when Suko popped out from the back and started massaging my shoulders. I jumped and gasped from the sudden touch, I had so many tensions in the base of my neck. I simply couldn’t deal, so I told her to stop and pushed her away. She laughed at me for being so uptight. But whatever, I was out of my mind, I didn’t care.

So yeah, after a bit of self pampering, I hurried out the van and got my stuff. Suko followed me behind, almost clinging unto me. I could tell she didn’t want me to go. But I couldn’t care less, all I wanted was a bed and a shower, it is all I wanted. We hugged though, for a very long time. I also promised to call her and meet her in SoHo once the break was over. Then she stole the keys from my hand and humped in the van. Leaving me on the sidewalk with nothing but a heavy mind and a backpack at my feet. I watched the van disappear in the distance.

And then alone I was again, naturally.

My parent’s house hadn’t changed, with it’s amber tarnished bricks and wooden shutters that clashed with the wind. The grass was yellow, but it’s always been yellow. I made my way to the front door and knocked, quite loudly. My parents didn’t know I was coming. I guess I should’ve been nervous, but I wasn’t, I had no energy. Which is kind of a good thing, if you ask me.

I just waited in the silence and the morning sun, hair sticking on my scalp, sweat dripping down my neck. And guessing from the color of my hands, I’m pretty sure I looked like a walking corpse. I was just about to give up, but that’s when the frame opened. A creaking sound invaded my ears before the sight of my father, slowly, creeped out the doorway.

I was shocked at how older he looked, and how thin. All of his hair had fallen off and his mustache was completely grey. He wore a bathrobe, and damn, he looked like an elderly turtle.

“Mia?” He exclaimed, blinking as he took off his harry potter glasses.

I smiled awkwardly. “Y-yeah, it’s me Henri…”

“Oh good… good lord! What are you doing here kochanie?” Kochanie, pronounced ‘Ko-han-ye’ - means darling in polish. Henri’s been calling me like that since I can’t remember.

“I uh... was in the neighborhood?”

“Oh, kochanie!” He stepped forward and placed a hand on my shoulder, examining me. “You look so pale, what happened to you? Have you eaten something? You need to eat something!”

I laughed nervously, feeling slightly invaded by my dad’s attention. “Nah, it’s fine daddy I swear…just been working a lot lately.” I mumbled, not getting into details, it was pointless and I had no will.

My dad shook his head in disbelief and led me inside. I almost tripped when I entered, that’s how weak I was. The inside of the house was dark, if not for the few rays glowing unevenly across the hall. The first thing I noticed was the smell, it didn’t smell like my home, it smelled like something I didn’t know, something like a stranger. But maybe I was the stranger.

I was in the living room now.

I couldn’t believe what I saw, everything was empty. All the decoration was gone; the lamps, the rugs, all of it. Boxes were stacked on top of each other in every corners. Even plastic sheets were wrapped around the couches. It was a saddening view, really.

And I wasn’t ready for it, at all.

Only the orange walls reminded me of what it used to be. I fidgeted, dropping my bags as I scanned the room. My dad noticed it and smiled at me poorly.

“Are you moving out?” I asked.

Henri nodded. “Y-yes… yes we are kochanie. I wanted to tell you, but your mother wasn’t ready.” He confessed, somewhat sadly, again.

I frowned. “Ow…” I rubbed the back of my neck, not sure at how I was feeling. I wasn't sad or angry, but troubled. Either it was my dad’s beaten look, or this house that gave me the blues.

“This place’s too big for us kochanie, too expensive, we need something smaller.”

“No I, I understand Henri… I’m just, I didn’t expect this.”

My dad laughed nervously, the kind of laugh you use to fill a gap of silence. Then he made a gesture to follow him. “Come kochanie, your mom’s in the kitchen…”

I nodded and followed him, glancing at the living room one last time. I strolled down the corridor until reaching the kitchen in the back, at least here, the sun was shining through. Then I spotted my mom, she was sitting at the table, reading some old magazine with a cup of tea. She hadn’t changed, her. Just the same old bleached blond hair and makeup from the night before laying under her eyes - some cheap blue eyeshadow. I was still hiding behind my dad when he cleared his throat - causing her to look at us.

“Martha, your daughter’s here...”

“What?” She cried out, eyes widening as she almost yanked her magazine on the wall. “Mia?”

I stepped from my hiding spot and leaned in the doorway, waving a subtle hand at her. “Yeah, it’s me ma.”

“Ow baby!” Martha threw herself on me, hugging me tight, like no tomorrow. At first I didn’t know how to handle it, but soon after, I learned the move and hugged her back.

“M’sorry I’m all dirty ma.” I mumbled in her neck, she smelled like toxic flowers.

“Ow, and do you think I care?” She shot, voice high-pitched and trembling. “I’ve missed you so much baby! Oh my baby!”

The 3 of us finally managed to share a common laugh as we all sat around the table. Of course my dad brought up the fact that I was looking pale, so of course my mom freaked out and started cooking. I tried arguing, but it was pointless. Seriously I wasn’t hungry, all I wanted was to sleep, but I had to stay awake just a little longer for them. Even though this kitchen seemed too white and vacant and ripped from all life. Even though my dad looked kinda sad, or if my mom seemed desperate. It all didn’t matter. I had to stay awake for them, for all the times I didn’t.

They started asking me all kinds of questions, from my new job, to my old job, boyfriends, money, how long I would stay here, blah blah. I answered the best I could and then listened to their own tragedies. But it was only small talk, nothing real. Every time I would ask something serious, about the house or their mental health, they changed the subject. As if it made them uncomfortable. So surfacing the surface we did, as we call it.

But god, how I hate small talk, it’s stupid and depressing. I prefer silence, at least it can mean something, sometimes.

But hey, they raised me well so I endured it all. Not that I didn’t enjoy their company, I really loved my parents and I missed them. But at that moment, everything seemed off, like a bad feeling I couldn’t shake off my chest. Maybe it’s because I was drained from the road, I couldn't tell.

I couldn’t tell anything at this point.

It was 2pm when I went to bed. It took me everything to crawl to my old room. And I swear, the second I touched the mattress, I was gone. I just fell asleep, fully clothed, sweaty, teeth unbrushed, stomach heavy and mind dizzy.

I think I snored too, yeah, I probably snored.



****



I woke up.

It was silence.

It was dark.

Empty.

I didn’t recognize that place. All traces of my old life had been erased. The purple wallpaper that used to cover the walls had been torn up, exposing uneven patterns underneath. Cracks covered the walls. This wasn’t a room anymore, it was a void. Yet again, a weird sadness invaded my soul.

Then I checked my watch; it was 1am.

Shit. That means I slept for 11 hours. Gerard must’ve been worried I didn’t call. Oh but fuck it, I really needed a shower now. I was so sticky I swear, it was unbearable. And I thought maybe, that’d chase the bad vibes away.

I tiptoed in the hallway, doing my best not to wake my parents up. I entered the small bathroom and yet again, everything was gone in here. The only thing left was a red towel on the rack. I began searching through the drawers, hoping to find some soap or shampoo. But again, same scenario. I cursed a little, getting sick of this nonsense. Then I opened the mirror cabinet, b-but...

Fuck.

I… I couldn’t believe what I saw.

The damn cabinet was filled with pills. But not just normal pills, no. It was the kind of pills that even drugs addict wouldn’t want to touch, with scientific names impossible to read. And fuck, they were all my dad’s! His name was written on the bottles. There were so many of them, so many shapes and colors. I grabbed a bottle, hoping to understand. And yes... everything made sense now. From the worried look on my dad’s face, or this ghostly house that smelled like regret. All this emptiness around me, all of it.

Now I knew.

My dad was sick, or maybe worse; dying. That’s why they’re selling the house, the treatments must be too expensive, I’m sure of it. But of course my parents didn’t tell me, they’re too proud for that, too prude, too scared.

Ugh. I had to get out of here before going mad. This damn house, it sucked the life out of me. I put the pills back where they belonged and hurried out the bathroom. Maybe I was acting crazy again, I don’t know. But I couldn’t stay there, I just couldn’t. This place was just a shell of my past. I sprawled into my old bedroom and grabbed my bags. I wasted no time and climbed over the window. I jumped and landed in the backyard; palms and knees covered in muck now. I had no plan but it didn’t matter.

All I needed was to get away, even if I had nowhere to go.

Well okay, that’s not true… there was one place, one person. Someone who was waiting for me, someone I forgot to call, someone I missed. But dammit, it was so late now and I didn’t even know if he’d be there. Ugh. Problem is, I had no fucking choice! I needed company so badly, but mostly, it is him that I needed. I wanted to hear his raspy voice, it was the only thing I wanted. The only thing that made sense, in this twisted heart of mine.

I was walking down the street now, in the middle of the night, it was dark and silent. But gladly, the moon guided me as I ran to the nearest bus station. And after bypassing all the empty streets, I finally hit town, slightly out of breath. The station was located on a boulevard and from memory, I knew there was a night bus around. I waited on a small bench, smoking a cigarette as I wondered if I should call Gerard. He left me a text around 8pm, while I was sleeping. “Are you coming tonight?” it said. But knowing him, I’m sure he wanted to write more, maybe he thought I ditched him. Ow fuckin’ hell. And there I was, coming to him in the middle of the night because I felt like shit.

This life I had, I tell ya, it didn’t make any sense.

After an hour, white headlights finally blinded my eyes. I picked a few coins from my pockets and entered the bus. The neons above me flashed constantly, it was hard to see properly and the driver looked kinda high. But good thing is, I was the only passenger. Well, except for a crackhead at the front who was talking to himself. But hey, this was New Jersey after all. I just settled myself in the back and tried to figure out where to land. After 25 minutes, I think I recognized Belleville so I rang the bell. I asked the driver for directives, and luckily, he knew where Gerard’s street was. I thanked him and stepped out.

I really didn’t know where the hell I was. The scene reminded me of a horror movie, especially with the creepy park just ahead of me. The streets were large but the houses were small. I started walking down the road, scanning every houses and street names. The driver told me that the house was on the other side of the park. But of course I didn’t want to go there, it was too dangerous. So instead, I followed along the metallic fence.

After something like 7 minutes, I figured I was on the other side so I went back on the street and looked at the signals.

And there, I spotted it; Berkeley Avenue.

I was finally there, safe and sound.

I skipped a couple of houses before finding number 41. The house was your typical house, with red bricks and a large lawn, nothing fancy, slightly plain and very american. There was no car in the driveway, nor lights. A sudden nervousness invaded me. Until now, it was my impulsion that controlled me. But now, as I stood in front of his house in the middle of the night, I felt incredibly stupid. What would I do if his parents would answer? Or if no one would answer, for that matter?

I guess it didn’t matter now, I had to man up and knock on the damn door.

Which is what I did.

I crawled my feet to the front and knocked 3 steady knocks, devouring the inside of my cheeks every time I heard the clash. Then I waited, tilting on the spot. But... no one was answering. I knocked a second time, louder. But again, there was no answer. Fucking shit. I knew this would happen. I sighed heavily and turned around, I settled myself on the sidewalk and lighted a cigarette, contemplating my misery; the one I actually put upon myself.

I was just figuring out a plan to go back to New York when I heard a creaking sound. Like the sound of an old door, slowly opening, you know that sound? Yeah, well it’s creepy. Anyway, I stopped moving for a second, listening carefully. The sound came from behind me, so obviously I turned around. And there it was, Gerard’s figure, standing in the doorway. I stared at him from afar, he looked like he’d just woken up. He squinted, trying to understand who the hell I was.

“Mia?” He then said, voice hoarse and cracking.

“Uh yeah, it’s me.” I mumbled, slightly embarrassed.

“What the hell are you doing here? It’s 3am!” He whispered kinda loudly.

“Um, well, I told you I’d drop by...”

Gerard just stared at me for a while, completely baffled to see me there. He then shook his head in disbelief and laughed. I didn’t know what to do.

“Hum…” I started. “I can go if you want...”

He laughed again. “Are you crazy? Just get inside! Come on!” He hurried a gesture.

I nodded and walked to the front door. Gerard was just waiting for me, watching me with steady eyes. He leaned against the doorway, holding the knob. I avoided his gaze as I stepped inside. But then I couldn’t see anything, it was too dark. It even got worse when Gerard closed the front door. I heard him sigh. Then I turned around to look at him, but all I could see was his silhouette.

“Look Mia, I’m not mad, I just…” He paused a little. “I didn’t expect to see you at this hour, that’s all.”

“I’m sorry, I should’ve called you.” I murmured.

“Well you’re here now so...” Gerard snorted. “Doesn’t matter.”

“I hope it didn’t wake your parents up.”

He stepped a little closer. “Nah, I’m the only one here.”

“Oh, that’s great.” I replied quickly. “I-I mean, that I didn't wake them.”

“Yeah…” He whispered. “...great.”

I gulped.

Then a silence came.

Gerard cleared his throat. “So hum, my bedroom’s downstairs.”

“Cool” I breathed out.

Then Gerard walked past me and grabbed my hand, my heart leaped when he did. His damn hand was moist like always, but it was so warm. He led me the way as we strolled down the stairs, the old wood cracked beneath our feet.

“Careful” He mumbled.

Once we reached the basement, Gerard turned the lights on. I blinked a few times, adjusting to the brightness. The room was grey, it was pretty large and empty, if not for the leather couch in the middle, which looked very uncomfortable. But apart from that, it was a plain sight. There were 3 doors in the back, but they were closed. I simply scanned the room for a while, knowing Gerard was staring. He didn’t move from the light switch, as if he still couldn’t believe I was there.

“Can I smoke in here?” I asked, wanting to fill the silence around us.

Gerard snapped back. “Huh sure.”

I smiled at him and lighted a cigarette. I even blocked a laugh when I noticed the dorky pyjama he was wearing. He had Ninja Turtles pants with a black t-shirt and his hair was all greasy. But he was fucking cute, his face was all puffy. Gerard kinda realized I was checking him out so he twitched nervously and walked to one of the doors.

“Hum...” He started. “You wanna come in?” He mumbled as he opened the frame.

I nodded and reached his side.

Gerard entered the room, which I presume was his. “Huh sorry for the mess… I didn't know you were coming so I didn't clean it…”

“It’s fine, don’t worry.” I hushed, penetrating his dome.

And man, he was right, it was a damn mess in there. The room was dark and squarely shaped; the walls were deep blue, creating a cocoon atmosphere. Dirty clothes aired aimlessly on the floor, as well as empty beer cans, cigarettes, junk, and boots. Also crumpled papers formed a pile beside his nightstand, it was a total nightmare. But I didn’t give a shit. There was a small window just above his bed, the moon lurked at us.

I jumped over the items and sat on the bed. His mattress was really low, it almost touched the ground and it squeaked when I moved my butt. Gerard just stood in front of me, hands on his hips, making sure I was settled down. He looked preoccupied though.

I shook my head but he didn’t say anything. “What?”

Gerard blushed and looked away. “N-nothing, anyway...” He cleared his throat. “I’ll put some music.”

I nodded. “Okay.”

Gerard turned around and walked to his wooden shelf in the back. A large collection of vinyls was spread out. He skipped through the covers, cursing under his breath. But then he found something. “Ha! Heroes. You love Bowie?”

“I fucking love Bowie.” I replied.

He grinned then strolled to his turntable beside his nightstand. He delicately placed the vinyl on it, slipping it out of it’s cover first, just before angling the tonearm on the surface. “Hum, I put the song number 3.” Gerard said, then shortly after, a crackling sound came through, followed by the song Heroes. A warm feeling invaded me, I loved this song so much, it always reached my soul. Then Gerard kneeled down and lighted candles on, 4 to be precise, making the atmosphere all fuzzy and nice.

I smiled softly, he was trying so hard.

“You like it like that?” He asked as he looked at me. The flames glowed softly on his face.

I chuckled silently. “It’s perfect Gee.”

He smiled then sat on the floor and placed a cigarette between his lips that he let hang. “You want one?” He muffled.

“Uh sure.” I had just finished mine, but hey, why not?

“Okay, but you have to sit on the floor with me.” He smirked.

I shook my head and sighed, hopping on the ground. Gerard immediately moved his butt closer to me. He leaned his back against the bed-box and I did the same. We were kinda close now, our crossed legs were touching, his knee brushed mine. Then he gave me a cigarette and fuelled me with fire.

“Thanks.” I whispered before dragging a long puff.

We smoked silently for a while, listening to the weeping guitars. We sometimes looked at each other but glanced away when our gazes met. I can’t lie, it was a bit awkward, given the fact that we were completely alone, and we knew it, how we knew it. But deep down, I was happy, I didn’t want to be anywhere else. I felt like a stupid teenager again, right in the nest of his intimacy.

Then Gerard spoke again.

“Why are you here?” He murmured, accent thick and clear.

I frowned. “Huh, I already told you…”

“No you didn’t…”

“Yes I did, I told you I’d drop by.”

“Oh yeah?” He laughed at me. “At 3am? In the middle of the night?”

“Uh” I opened my mouth but closed it instantly, groaning.

“Come on Mia, what happened?” He pushed, nudging my arm.

I looked away and shut my eyes, sighing. “It’s nothing.”

“Mia…” His voice raised. “Don’t start with your bullshit, it doesn’t work with me.”

Ugh, he was right. I couldn’t lie to him, I never could. “I-it’s my parents…”

“Ow, did they do something to you?” Gerard sounded worried.

I shook my head. “N-no, not intentionally.”

“Then what is it?”

I took a deep breath, then looked at him. “I.. I found pills.”

Gerard squinted. “Pills?”

“Y-yeah, in the bathroom.”

A brooding look appeared on his face, asking me to explain further.

I sighed. “I know my dad’s sick, he didn’t tell me but-” I paused, biting my lip. “It all makes sense now.”

“Are you sure about it?”

“Yeah, he looked so old and thin… and sad. Ugh, a-and my mom she-” I swallowed, my throat was so dried. “She was so desperate Gee.”

Gerard didn’t say anything, he just stared, thoughtful and compelled.

“But the worst part was the house… everything was gone, it was lifeless, fucking empty.” I mumbled bitterly. “I… I couldn’t stay there any longer I needed to-”

“Needed to what?” He whispered.

I glanced down. “I-I needed t-”

Gerard cupped my chin to lift my head, eyes flaring but not threatening. “Needed to what Mia?”

I quivered. “...see you.”

Gerard moaned at my words. “Well… I’m here now.” He moved closer.

“I know.” I breathed.

Gerard brushed his thumb over my bottom lip, causing my mouth to open but my eyes to close.

I gasped. “Y-you shouldn't touch me, I’m disgusting...”

“No you’re not.” He argued, now tangling his fingers in my hair. “You’re beautiful Mia.”

His words crushed my insides. I shivered and leaned unto his touch, small tears burned the corner of my eyes. I don’t know why I was crying. Maybe it was his honesty, always so pure and brutal, which was something I couldn’t give. Or maybe it’s because I realized he was all I wanted, that I craved him endlessly, all of the time. That all of him killed me, but god forbid I lived for it.

Either way I was fucked, especially when he looked at me like that.

Gerard’s eyebrows furrowed. “Why do you cry? Is it because of me?”

“N-no… I-I don’t know.” I whined. “Fuck I’m sorry.”

Gerard moaned sadly, eyes in despair, scanning my face. As if he was trying to find a solution. I simply stared back, my vision getting more and more blurry. I felt like a fool for crying, I hated it, I fucking hated it. But then Gerard moved his face closer.

“Huh Gerar-”

“Shhh” He shushed me and pressed his nose against my left cheek, and then, I felt something small and wet. It was his tongue, he just licked a small strip beside my mouth, where a tear had fallen.

I gasped and pulled away out of reflexes, I couldn’t help it.

“Uh, I’m sorry Mia…” Gerard babbled. “I thought maybe tha-”

“No” I cut him sharply.

Gerard blinked, confused.

“C-can you…” I started. “Can you do it again?”

He frowned, overwhelmed by my sudden mood change, I don’t blame him.

“P-please I… I want to feel you.” My voice cracked as I whispered. And I sounded desperate, but I didn’t care.

Gerard gulped loudly, staring at me with poignant eyes. His face moved forward, but he seemed so unsure. Probably scared I’d push him away.

“Please” I begged him.

Gerard nodded and pressed his forehead against mine, he was so warm. Then his hand cupped the side of my face. But we didn’t move. We couldn’t - the both of us - we simply trembled within each other. I could feel his breath on my mouth, it was ragged and shaky.

“Are you okay?” He asked softly.

“Uh-huh” I managed to say as I closed my eyes. “Are you?”

“Yeah” He breathed out, and then, he kissed the corner of my mouth.

I whimpered and twitched, but I loved it, I really loved it and I wanted more. Though Gerard stopped again, pulling back, making sure I was alright. He looked into my eyes, into my soul. I simply nodded and swallowed painfully, telling him to keep on going. He then placed a second kiss on the other side of my mouth, but this one was longer, deeper. My hand found it’s way to his hair and tugged at the dirty strands. Gerard moaned in response and suddenly gripped my lower back to shove me closer.

“Uahh” A loud moan tore through my throat - he held me even tighter. He then travelled down to my neck and breathed heavily against my skin.

“Mia-” He muffled “Argh fuck Mia-” He growled as he bit me.

I hissed at the slight pain, his teeth were sharp.

Then he started attacking my neck with sloppy kisses, moaning as he tasted me. “I want you-” He whispered brokenly in between.

I cried out, slowly losing my mind. I could feel Gerard surrender, his weight pounded unto me, like he needed friction, like he needed love. I couldn’t think straight anymore, his touch was deadly to me, a fucking drug, and his smell, his smell was so good. He then reached my collarbone and sucked on the tips. My head dropped back as I bared my throat for him.

“Ah- I really…” He started, voice throaty and panting. “I really wanna make love to you Mia-” His hand caressed my stomach, rolling up my shirt, exposing my skin. “I wanna fuck you-”

I moaned again, shuddering at his words. Gerard was shameless and it me turned on, so so much. But a sudden panic raised inside of me, realizing how crazy this was. Everything went so fast. And I was so dirty, so damn sweaty, I couldn’t do this. I felt disgusted with myself, undesirable, filthy.

And I knew I would regret it, as much as I wanted him.

“G-gerard” I tried.

But he just groaned and lowered his kisses to my breasts.

“Gerard stop!” I yawped painfully.

He finally pulled away and glared at me, confused and out of breath. “What, what is it?”

“I-I can’t do this…” I shook my head. “I… I need to take a shower, I feel dirty.”

He frowned. “Ow… right now?”

“Y-yeah” I swallowed and pushed him away gently. Then I stood up and straighten my clothes down. Fuck. My legs were shaking, I couldn’t walk properly. I ran a hand on my face, trying to get my spirit back. My eyes scanned the room before spotting my bag in the corner. I crawled to it then turned around to look at him. “Where’s your bathroom?” I asked nervously.

Gerard was still laying on the ground, horny and desperate. And he looked at me, and fuck, those eyes, they were too much to handle. I had left him on the edge and I knew it. “Uh, s-second door, to the right…”

I nodded and sprung out the room.

I just needed a fucking shower.

Notes

finally made it through