Jilted generation

I spent the weekend laid in bed, just daydreaming to myself. I would occasionally go down stairs and speak to my mum and dad but I preferred to rest my bones on the sofa and just channel flick all day, as Gerard often went out to meet his friends. On Monday my mum said that I was allowed to go back to school. I couldn't wait.


I sat in form on the Monday after I had managed to pull myself out of bed that morning. I waited for Quinn to arrive. I couldn't wait to talk to her, she would understand. She would be able to help me. She had saved me more than once. You see we have been friends for only about a year but it feels like I've known her all my life. If I ever felt sick at school she would always comfort me and she didn't mind that I occasionally had to stay at home for a few days if my condition got worse. She was constantly telling me that I was perfect and should be happy in who I was. But I hated who I was. I just wanted to be like her. Just be able to help others.

I heard my fingers begin to tap against the wooden table as the minutes ticked by. Where was she? She was never normally this late! I then started to worry and felt the eyes of everyone else in class begin to notice my friends absence. I felt them seem to burn through me and I turned my eyes away from the front and towards the door.

"What's up Mikey?!" Asked Mathew, the kid with a dead blonde rat stuck to his head which was his attempt of a hairstyle. "Has Quinn abandoned you like everybody else?"
I gulped, moving my eyes to the writing and scratches on the table. I didn't want to reply. No. That would just make it worst. So much worse. But staying quiet wouldn't save me. Nothing would save me.
"Well, at least she finally got some sense," he continued," finally stopped hanging around with you, you worthless piece of sh*t!"

This always used to happen before I'd met Quinn. She would always defend me in these kind of situations. But she wasn't here. I looked towards the door again willing her to walk in and plant herself next to me. But that didn't happen.

"Oi! Mikey!" He continued. I didn't look back. "Sorry, you don't go by that name do you." I looked up confused at his reply.
"Please will you just shut up for once in your life" I mumbled to myself. I didn't mean for him to hear.
"You what?!" He shouted.
"Nothing...." I whispered back.
"No!" He began to move closer until I could feel his breath on my face, " what did you say you anorexic f*ck?!!! Come on! What did you say?! Tell me! You ain't got your precious Quinn to save you now!!!"
"Um..um, I-I.." I stuttered, his eyes staring straight into mine. I think my body began to tremble and a smirk appeared on Mathews face when he noticed.

"What did you say? You fat sh*t!" He asked again. "You trying to be smart you dumb ass c*nt?!" I could hear his friends begin to snigger, they sounded like a group of hyenas on helium.
"No... No. I-I'm not trying to, um, to b-be smart" I whispered back.
"Good. I don't like it when unloved f*ckers like you try to be smart with people like me."
"Listen Mathew... I-I don't have anything against you," (I lied, I hated him for making my life a misery. But maybe this would work) " I never wanted to cause any problems between us two."
"Problems?!" He asked, that smile creeping back onto his smug face. "If anything around here's the problem then its you! You're the problem Mikey F*cking Way!!!! YOU! ARE! THE! PROBLEM!" He screamed in my face. "It's all YOU!!!"
I didn't even have chance to reply before his fist connected with my face.

Notes