Gerard and I celebrated his first day by ordering Chinese and watching dumb movies together. It felt surprisingly good and natural to have him on the couch with me, even sharing a blanket with him. Gerard looked over at me and sighed. “Mikey and I...we were separated when we were little..”
I turned the volume down on the tv as an invitation for him to keep talking. “Mhm.”
“I was seven and he was twelve…we were put in foster homes cause our family didn't have any money at all and we had no relatives we could live with. After a few years, we were um. Put back together again. When I was ten. And we were living with my aunt. She was a really nice lady, but her son was seventeen...and he used to...do stuff to me. Mikey found out and he tried to intervene, but my cousin basically told everyone he was having a psychotic break and Mikey actually got taken to hospital..”
Gerard looked down, playing with his fingers. I moved closer to him and awkwardly wrapped an arm around his shoulders. “It's not your fault.”
He sighed and turned, snuggling up to my chest a little forwardly. I let him, even though I wasn't sure what to do with my hands. “I still think about it, though. And how he tried to stand up for me and I ended up being a shitty person anyway.”
I pulled the blanket up a little and sighed. “You're not a shitty person, Gerard. Really.”
He looked down at his hands, tears coursing down his cheeks.
“If you say so.”
His voice was weak and shaky, and I could tell he was on the verge of a major breakdown. I rocked him a little and wiped his tears away gently. “Calm down, it's okay. Mikey loves you, and he's moved on.”

---

Mikey came over the next day, after Gerard had finished work. I was happy to see him, walking him inside. Gerard was curled up on the couch, filling in his coloring book. He looked up at Mikey, his expression blank. The older man sat down next to him, hugging him carefully. “Hey Gee..” He said softly, ruffling his brother’s hair. Gerard stared at me sadly and I suddenly felt out of place, creeping off into the kitchen to make coffee. I was putting the filter in when my phone rang.

---

I grabbed my coat and shoes and said quick goodbyes, explaining that I was needed for a riot downtown. Gerard's eyes widened and he pressed himself closer to Mikey, who just calmly waved. I jogged out of the door and to my car, a little nervous about leaving. I'd been in riot control before, I wasn't really scared about that. It wasn't fun, but it wasn't horrible. I was more worried about leaving Gerard so upset. I sighed and drove to the station to get changed into my uniform.

When I got downtown, I found Pete and joined him in trying to talk down a couple rioters. It didn't look like a particularly driven crowd, but this kid had some kind of torch going. They were angry about minimum wage cuts, and I couldn't blame them. As the crowd moved and surged towards me, Gerard's smile flickered in my mind’s eye. This hurt him, too. Suddenly I felt as angry as the rest of the crowd, pushing back against them and seething quietly. My job was to keep this under control, not escalate it, no matter how much I might want to. Pete stood next to me the whole time, helping me keep angry people away from the city hall. Usually I felt more alert during situations like this, but today, I was just in a daze. I could barely focus, I was just going through the motions of the training that had been drilled into me.

The riot died down after a few hours. It was pretty pathetic, honestly. Pete came back to my house to pick up Mikey. I stepped through my front door and found the two men laying on the couch together, fast asleep.
I smiled slightly and let my shoulders drop. Pain flooded my body and I gasped, shivering. Pete hummed softly to me and kept a hand on my back as he went to wake Mikey. I shook him off and hurried into the bathroom. I slipped my shirt off and stared at the black, mottled bruises all over my ribs and chest. I hadn't even noticed the stinging ache until now. I had barely known they were there. I got fully undressed, finding new bruises all over my body. I sighed and ran a hand through my hair, reaching behind the shower curtain to turn the water on. I stretched and ran my hands over my thighs. I blinked and looked at my fingers, trying to figure out why the insides felt wet. There was blood soaking the tips of my fingers, running down my hands. I bit my lip and looked down. There was a large gash on the inside of one of my thighs, running to the back. It was low down, not easy to notice. I picked up my uniform trousers, staring at the rip. I felt numb. I didn't know how to react, really. I was still in shock that I was even injured. Even Pete hadn't seen it.
I sighed and climbed into the shower, shivering as I watched the rusty water run down the drain.

---

Someone was knocking on the door. I sat up a bit, rubbing my eyes. “Frank? You've been in there for an hour! Are you okay?”
Gerard's voice roused me a little and the biting cold of the water spread up my body, making me jump. I got up hurriedly, clumsily turning the water off. “Uh. Yeah..”
Gerard sighed softly. “Okay. If you say so.”
I looked down and rubbed my eyes. I must have passed out in the shower. I yawned and grabbed one of my towels, drying myself off. I patted the gash dry and bandaged it up calmly, still feeling numb. I dressed myself in comfortable pajamas, leaving the bathroom quietly. Gerard was waiting in the hallway, his expression blank again. I limped past him and climbed into bed, my body stiff and sore. I closed my eyes and started to doze off just as a warm body slipped under the covers with me. I opened my eyes a crack and saw red as Gerard buried his face in my neck and hugged me tightly. Too tired to protest, I relaxed into his arms and fell asleep easily.

Notes