Latter Day Sinner

“So what’s the deal?” Cooter asked one morning. They were finishing up band practice one Monday afternoon, and the aforementioned guitarist was draped across a lawn chair. Frank looked up, arching his eyebrows.

“The uh, the deal?” he asked uncertainly. Cooter nodded and sat up properly, looking at him intently.

“Yeah. Where are you these days? You haven’t hung out with us outside of band practice in like…like a month,” Cooter continued, waving a hand. Frank shared a concerned look with Mia who, helpfully as ever, just gave a little shrug in response.
Frank sighed, putting his guitar back in its case and looked back at Cooter.

“I’ve just been busy, that’s all,” he said gently. It wasn’t untrue. He had been busy. He’d been busy cuddling with his not-quite boyfriend.
Although, in the week since their talk, there hadn’t been much of that either. But in essence, that’s what he’d been doing.

“Too busy for your friends?” Cooter asked sharply.
Mia, thankfully, came to his rescue then, standing up and standing between them.

“Guys, guys, come on. Frank has his reasons, I’m sure,” she cooed. Frank nodded and smiled at her.
At that point, though, even Damien cut in with a little shrug and a reluctant tone.

“I mean…Frankie…you haven’t been around much,” he pointed out, his voice soft, but accusatory nonetheless. Frank looked to Mia again for help – but she was looking at him with a sort of sheepish expression, too. In fact, all of his friends were. They looked irritated, but also genuinely hurt.
He swallowed hard, feeling guilt stirring in his stomach.

“I…I’m real sorry, guys. I didn’t realise that I was-“ he shook his head, biting his lip.
“I’m sorry. Let’s do something this weekend, huh?” he suggested. He didn’t miss the way the group looked at each other, as if they were silently debating on whether or not to accept the apology. While that hurt, he knew he didn’t deserve any less.

“I guess so,” Cooter said eventually with a flippant one-armed shrug. Frank smiled a little and nodded, tugging his bag over his shoulder.

“That’s great. Thanks, guys. I promise I won’t blow it,” he grinned.

It was at that point that he glanced up and made eye contact with Daniel who, he noticed, had a faint shadow over one eye, the skin swollen and irritated. Frank frowned, looking at him intently until the other boy looked up. When he realised Frank was looking at him, he blushed and averted his eyes. Something about the (albeit brief) interaction made Frank deeply uncomfortable, a nervous, twisting feeling in his stomach. He made a mental note to mention it to him if he chance – which, at that time he didn’t. Almost as soon as their eyes averted, Daniel stammered a general goodbye and stormed out of the garage
Nobody but Frank seemed to find it odd.


Frank wasn’t looking for an excuse to go see Gerard – but he certainly wasn’t complaining when he had one. Frank walked to Gerard’s house with a strong feeling of anticipation which, embarrassingly, he felt often when it came to Gerard. It wasn’t just the tension between them that got him excited (although, it certainly didn’t diminish the feeling); but the knowledge that, in a few moments, Frank would be able to actually see him.
That, at least, was something to get excited about, as far as Frank was concerned.

He arrived in the late afternoon, the sun just about dipping behind the soft, hazy clouds that slipped lazily along the horizon.

Gerard was, to Frank’s surprise, already sitting just outside his house, leaning against the front door with a cigarette hanging from between his full lips.
Frank raised an eyebrow in surprise as he approached, watching as Gerard smoked with ease.

“I’m guessing that’s not a Sin either?” Frank teased as he moved to stand just in front of the Priest. Gerard laughed and gave a little half-smirk as he sucked gently on his cigarette, letting the smoke pour from his nose.

“It’s not. Not everything is,” he teased. Frank laughed gently, sitting down next to him on the porch.

“Only the fun stuff, then?” he smiled, taking the cigarette from Gerard’s hand. He didn’t even really think about what he was doing, as he brought the stick to his lips and took a deep breath. It was only when Gerard made a soft noise that he realised and met his eyes.
Frank gave an apologetic smile and handed him the cigarette back, feeling a blush blossom over his cheeks, his eyes falling to the floor.
Gerard, surprisingly, began to softly chuckle, nonchalantly sucking on his cigarette again.

“Oh, hush. I don’t mind,” he said kindly, taking Frank’s hand in his own.
That part, somehow, wasn’t surprising to Frank at all. He’d become very accustomed to Gerard’s gentle affections. They made him feel warm, any frustration immediately flushing away. Frank smiled, gently resting his head on Gerard’s shoulder.

“How was your day?” he asked lamely, rubbing the older man’s broad fingers. Gerard chuckled.

“It was okay. Do you wanna come inside?” Gerard asked, rising to his feet and offering a hand down to Frank.
Frank didn’t hesitate before taking his outstretched hand, allowing himself to be hoisted up to his feet. He shrugged once he was upright.

“I can’t. I gotta do work. But ah, I actually wanted to talk to you,” he admitted.
Gerard raised his eyebrows in faint amusement, leaning against the door. He waved a hand gently, motioning for Frank to continue.
The younger man hesitated before speaking.

“Uh. So I can’t hang out with you this week,” he said quickly.
Gerard didn’t seem upset, just slightly confused. He tilted his head, his eyebrows furrowing.

“Is it something I’ve done?” he asked coolly. His voice was very calm, as was his composure, but there seemed to be a faint wave of insecurity running through his veins. He seemed to be genuinely concerned, but appeared unfazed.
Frank bit his lip, shaking his head. A smile appeared across his cheeks despite himself. Gerard was very cute when he was insecure. It sort of reminded Frank that Gerard was actually interested in him – since they so rarely spoke about it.

“No, Gee. It’s not you at all. My friends were mad that I haven’t been hanging out with them, and I guess they’re right. So I’m gonna try and be there for them all week. And uh, that’s the weekend, too. So I guess I’ll see you next week?” he said gently. Gerard nodded and smiled.

“Yeah, that’s okay Frank, I understand,” he said coolly.
“Besides, I wouldn’t want them to find out about our little love affair,” he said teasingly, his eyes sparkling mischievously.

That, understandably, made Frank’s jaw drop a little.

“W-what?” he breathed, blinking slowly.
The light from the falling sun glimmered in Gerard’s eyes, giving them a mischievous twinkle as he tried, very hard, not to laugh.

“You’re so easily flustered, Frankie. It’s cute,” he murmured, stroking his hair. Frank still looked flabbergasted, his eyes wide.

“Why do you keep teasing me?” Frank whined. Gerard laughed softly.

“Because it’s fun. And easy,” he shrugged.

“Do you mean it, though?” Frank asked, his heart thrumming in his chest. Gerard was quiet for a moment, before leaning in and kissing the corner of his mouth.

“See you soon, Frankie,” he murmured, slipping into his house, leaving Frank confused, gobsmacked, and more than a little aroused on his porch.


“There he is!” Cooter called happily as Frank approached them the following evening. They were all sitting in the park, sitting on a makeshift picnic blanket made out of hoodies.
Frank grinned and raised a hand in greeting as he approached his friends, sitting down between Damien and Daniel.

“Yeah, yeah. I told you I’d be here, didn’t I?” He smirked. Mia rolled her eyes, leaning back on her elbows.

“You can’t blame us for being worried, Frank. You’ve been AWOL for weeks,” she pointed out. Frank glared at her. He found this comment particularly frustrating, because she knew damn well why he hadn’t been there.
Of course, she couldn’t say that, so he partially appreciated her dedication to the ruse.
Frank waved a hand dismissively, grabbing a can of coke from his bag and taking a long sip.

“Yeah, well. I’m here. So stop bein’ lame,” he chuckled, leaning back. The group seemed generally glad to have him there and, for a moment, he felt bad about having neglected him – if that’s really what they thought. Sure, he’d had a legitimate reason, but this was nice. There was something very refreshing about being able to just be, without the fear of being caught, or trying to work out where he stood. He knew his friends loved him, and he knew that he belonged with them. That’s something he knew that he’d never get with Gerard, even if they did take things further.
And that, of course, was a big ‘if’. To take things ‘further’, that would imply that where they were was an actual defined location, which Frank wasn’t entirely sure it was.
He felt very confused, then, and a little dazed, so he tried to ignore the thoughts.
Instead, he focused on the dim sunlight warming his cheeks, and the grins of his friends in the dying light.
They mattered to him, more than he could tell them. Gerard, for now, was remembered only by the occasional fluttering of a hummingbird trapped under his ribs.


Being away from Gerard for a whole week was unnerving to Frank. But what bothered him the very most was the break in routine. Normally he’d go to school, stop by Gerard’s, and be back home for dinner. It was an easy pattern to live by – and a satisfying one, too. It meant he got the most out of his day.

Gerard was smart. Really smart. Smart enough that, if Frank had a homework problem, or needed something explained to him from class, he was the one to go to. He wasn’t one for Math, Frank learned, but was proficient in Science and English. Not only that, but being a Priest, he was oddly good for moral guidance. It was a good arrangement – Frank got his company and guidance, and Gerard…
Well, Gerard got to be a teasing fuck. Obviously.

That’s not to say, of course, that Frank was a wreck without the older man. Quite the opposite. He began to go to his friends’ study sessions, which mainly involved sitting in someone’s living room with cans of whatever on the table, trying not to get stains from their food on their unread textbooks.
There wasn’t a hell of a lot of studying going on, granted, but it was fun nonetheless. Besides, with his studying sessions with Gerard, Frank knew a lot of it anyway, so he could partially justify his lack of concentration.

It was during one of these sessions that Frank found himself alone with Daniel for the first time since noticing his black eye. The bruise had faded, but he still seemed shaky and unusually quiet. So much so, that he actually jumped when Frank spoke to him suddenly.

“Hey, man, are you-

“I’m okay,” he said firmly, not meeting his eyes. Frank swallowed and touched his shoulder, feeling his stomach knot when he flinched.

“I don’t need you to tell me. I just…want you to know that you can, okay? No matter what. And if you need somewhere to crash, or anything like that-

“Thank you,” Daniel mumbled softly. It seemed genuine, though, despite its shy delivery. Frank, understandably, was tempted to push him for answers, to try and work out what was happening. But he knew from experience that that wasn’t any good. He just gave him an encouraging smile, squeezing his shoulder.
Daniel, for one, seemed to relax when he realised that Frank was going to drop the subject, which was enough of a reward that Frank didn’t bring it up again.

Eventually, the rest of their friends filtered back into the room, and Frank ended the conversation with a knowing look and a smile.
His worry didn’t go away, but Daniel seemed more at ease, which was a fair consolation prize.


Embarrassingly enough, Frank woke up very early on Sunday – like he normally would. He even made to get out of bed, until he remembered that he wasn’t going to Church.
He and his friends had made plans that evening to have a movie night at Mia’s. It was actually a weekly occurrence for the group but, obviously, Frank hadn’t been around for a while to be a part of it. His Sunday evenings were usually preoccupied with watching Gerard draw, or listening to him talk, or helping him apply various creams to his swollen leg.
It sounded dull when he thought about it objectively, but there was something magnetic about Gerard that made it all so thrilling.

Regardless, Frank slid himself back into bed, feeling his body relax into the mattress.
In some way, he supposed he was pleased for the extra time in bed.
This whole ‘being social’ thing involved a lot of exertion that Frank wasn’t interested in, nor used to.


Frank woke up again around lunchtime and, per his usual (pre-Gerard) routine, slid out of bed, still in just his underwear, and went downstairs to have whatever was in the fridge.
What he didn’t count on, though, was his parents already being back from Church.
A quick glance at the clock revealed the time to be two in the afternoon – far later than Frank had originally thought.

Despite his better judgement, Frank sat down on the sofa with his Mother, and asked, oh-so-casually, how Church was.
He felt his stomach twist when he saw her face drop.

“It was fine. Father Way seemed…distressed, though,” she mumbled. Frank tilted his head, trying to seem interested, but not overly so.

“Distressed? Like…what do you mean?” he asked. His Mother shrugged, glancing away from the TV.

“Just…unfocused. He seemed kind of angry, actually. It ruined the whole thing, in a way,” she said, her voice full of regret. Frank swallowed, rubbing his hands along his jeans.
Was Gerard mad at him? He’d seemed so cool about it when Frank had mentioned not seeing him. He couldn’t be mad, could he?

Frank found himself standing up without really making the decision to. He knew he had an obligation to his friends – and he’d be there. But he needed to check on Gerard first.
Besides his minor (major) obsession with him, Frank also knew that Gerard didn’t really have anyone else – not that he knew of, anyway. If the older man was in trouble, then he’d have to deal with it on his own, and Frank wasn’t content to let that happen.

Frank never dressed up for Gerard. Maybe it was all the time spent pretending not to have a crush on him, or maybe it was just that he didn’t really need to. Today was no exception – in fact, he probably looked worse than usual, because he was rushing eagerly to see him.
A good ten minutes after he made the decision to leave, Frank was rushing out of the house, shouting a vague excuse to his mother as he made his way to Gerard’s house.

The mid-autumnal air swept against his face, like icy tendrils caressing his skin. He ducked his head, but it didn’t do much to hold off the chill that forced itself onto his skin, despite the layers of clothes he’d piled on.

Eventually, with reddened hands and nose, Frank arrived at Gerard’s door. His mind was flooded with pitiful images of the man curled up on the sofa, eating a tub of ice cream and feeling sorry for himself.
The reality couldn’t have been more different.

Gerard came to the door several minutes later, his face set in an mask of irritation. When he saw Frank, however, it transformed, before settling on surprise. Pleasant surprise, Frank assumed.

“Come in,” Gerard said tersely, holding the door open for him and walking back into the warmth of the house. Frank was taken aback by his abruptness, but he did as he said. It would probably be good for Gerard, having someone to talk to.
Not only that, but Frank was more than a little bit eager to see him.

“So I he-
Frank didn’t even get to finish his sentence before he was swiftly pressed against the wall, his air leaving him in a heavy rush.
“Oh.”

“I’ve had a really, really shitty day,” Gerard growled, pinning Frank to the wall. His eyes were dark and hungry, his jaw set in a cold, hard line. Frank felt simultaneously concerned and aroused, a warmth building in his lower stomach.

“Y-yeah?” Frank stammered.
“Uh. Why?”
Gerard laughed bitterly at that, biting his lip as he shook his head in pure disbelief.

“I’ve given up everything for them. I’ve given up booze and sex and love. Everything,” he hissed.
“And y’know what? It’s not even…fuck. It’s not even worth anything. Because those bastards…”
Frank frowned, stroking Gerard’s cheek with the tips of his fingers. It seemed to calm him down slightly, but not enough. He still trembled with rage.

“What happened, Gee?” Frank whispered. Gerard looked at him, his eyes becoming more sad than angry – but the fire stayed burning in the back of them.

“They’ve been stealing money,” he croaked.
“The other Priests. They’ve been taking money. A-and it’s killin’ me, because I’ve been trying so hard to be good, and then they just do this. It hurts. It’s like this was all for nothing.” The words left him in a rush, and Frank looked at him with a sympathetic frown.

“I’m so sorry, Father. Is there anything I can do?” Frank asked weakly. When Gerard looked up again, he looked positively predatory. Frank felt a shiver run down his spine. Gerard held him tighter, fingers curling around his bicep.

“You know there is,” Gerard breathed, sliding a thigh between his legs. Frank swallowed, his mouth suddenly dry as he tried to consider what to say to that. He didn’t want to say no. He wanted so badly to be able to finally act out the fantasies that had been brewing in his mind.
But he also knew that he couldn’t. Not now. Not like this. Not until Gerard was certain.

“N-not that. I can’t…I can’t fuck you,” Frank murmured. He was being presumptuous, and was momentarily worried that he was reading too much into it.

“Why not?” Gerard asked simply. Frank swallowed hard again.

“Because you’re upset. I’m not gonna…not when you’re upset,” Frank murmured. Gerard’s eyes softened and he nodded, pulling away a little. Frank saw the red burst across his cheeks, and realised that he’d embarrassed him. Frank shook his head and held his arms, pulling the Priest closer.
“No. No, I won’t fuck you. But um-“ he leaned forward and gently pressed his lips to Gerard’s.
The Priest was stiff for only a moment, before relaxing, his eyes fluttering shut as he kissed him back, his hands moving into his hair.

It took only seconds for the kiss to get heated.
Almost like the flick of a switch, the men were suddenly panting and grinding, their hands too tight in each other’s hair, Gerard’s hips thrusting lazily at Frank’s, who thrusted right back.
“S-sofa,” Frank gasped, grabbing Gerard by the collar and dragging him into the living room. Gerard grinned and stumbled after him, his eyes alight and wild. He seemed younger, almost, like his desire was pumping youth into his veins.

Gerard laughed, pushing Frank down onto the sofa, climbing on top of him. His body shook slightly, but not from nerves – in fact, he was laughing. Not at Frank, by any means. He was just laughing with pure, unbridled joy. Frank beamed up at him, stroking his hair.

“Fuck. Fuck, we’re doing this, aren’t we?” Frank breathed.
Gerard raised an eyebrow and shrugged flippantly, kissing him deeply, before breaking away and giving him a breathless reply:

“Well, shit. We’re doing something.”

Notes