Sex. I've had it before but, I'd always been a top. But Gee- he didn't even really ask me, he just did. I was a bottom. My first time being a bottom, was with my step dad (special bonding am I right?). My first boyfriend, Bob says it hurts in the morning- but I have a high pain tolerance. Maybe it won't heard as bad, I thought. Ha I'm a complete idiot.

i opened my eyes, trying to sit up to check the time, "ow fuck," I yelled. Gerard opens his eyes looking up at me, he sat up, "awe baby- I'll go get you some pain meds," he stood running to the bathroom. "Dammit Frank," I mumbled.

He came back in with the pills frowning, "I didn't know you were a virgin," he mumbled. I took the pills shaking my head, "I'm not I've just never bottomed," I answered laying down on his chest.

"what time is it," I asked. He bit his lip, "I don't think you wanna know baby," he said running his fingers threw my hair. "It's the next day isn't it," I said sighing. He nodded, "wanna make it a two day thing," he asked looking down at me. I looked up, "sure why not,".

We layed there for a bit. I was able to get up after awhile and I took a shower, got dressed and went down stairs. Gerard was in his underwear making pancakes, "hey Hun, want some pancakes," he asked flipping one in the air. I nodded leaning on the kitchen counter.

When end he was finished making the pancakes we walked over with them all on one plate. I sat down on his lap, as he ran he hand up and down my back, as he feed them to me.

"Are they good," he asked biting his lip. I looked down and nodded, "yeah there good gee," he nodded taking some on the fork and eating them.

when we were finished I helped him clean up a bit. He washed dishes and I dried them. "Hey Frankie my brother Mikey and his boyfriend are coming over," he said handing me a plate. "Oh okay," I answered simply. Mikey was cool, i met him at the wedding. Him and his boyfriend Pete did get exteremly drunk vomiting in on the dance floor. I must say, that was my favorite part of the wedding. "So no kissing and shit," he said. I rolled my eyes, "I know,".

We finished up with the dishes, Gerard went upstairs showered and I picked out a move to watch. When Gerard finished he came downstairs. We sat there cuddling, kissing then the door finally was knocked on.

Gerard rolled his eyes, standing up getting to the door. I stood up leaning on the wall between the living room and enterance. "Hey Frank," Mikey said waving, I waved back. Pete walked over to me whispering in my ear, "got some marks on you Frankie," my eyes widened covering the marks on my neck with my hands.

Pete smirked, and Mikey laughed awkwardly. Gerard rolled his eyes closing the door. "H-hello to you too Pete," I said lowering my head. He laughed, "who is the luck girl," Mikey asked. I looked up, "My boyfriend," I thought for a bit for a name, "Ray,".

They nodded, Gerard laughed, "great I'm the only striaght guy here,". Mikey and Pete looked at each other the bursted into laughter, " yeah Gerard your totally straight," Mikey said falling to the ground. "Yeah that explains your chains of male hook ups," Pete yelled leaning against the wall for support.

I shot him a glare, "I'm going up to my room," I snapped. Gerard gave me a sorry look, "Frank come on-,". "Gerard leave me alone," I said head up the stairs. The laughing died down, and I heard Pete ask Gerard what my problem was.

i didn't know why this was hurting me, he's my step dad. He's my moms husband. And yet I had sex with him. I kissed him. This man who was in his 30s, old enough to be my dad and I had feelings from him. Yes I admit it, I like him. More than a quick hook up. I wanted to be his.

I sighed shutting my door. I went up to my journal, I needed to let this out. I couldn't just tell my friends, 'yo I like my step dad in like a crushy way'. So I needed to just write it out.

Gerard Way.

I like this man. And I know I shouldn't. He's my step dad. I can't want to kiss him, I can't want to touch him. I should want to have a normal relationship. Not a relationship relationship. I'm so sad that I can't be with him. What if he doesn't feel the same way? Ugh I'm so mental. I'm writing down my love affair with my moms husband. I feel guilty. I'm a guilty. I'm dirty.

-xo Frnk

I left my journal on my desk, as I went to go downstairs. I walked into the living room seeing Gerard sitting on the left side, and Pete and Mikey on the right. I sat awkwardly next to Gerard. Sharing awkward glances every once and awhile. He smiled once, I just looked away. This is wrong. Everything I feel is wrong.

Notes

Idk if I like this chapter. But I hope you all have a nice day