Pins And Needles

I wake up in a cold sweat. I look outside my bedroom window. The light bleeds out from the inside. It was just a nightmare. A nightmare about you. I haven't thought of you in so long. God, why do I seem to dream about you every night. Actually it's always a nightmare never a dream.
You promised you'd come back safe and sound. But what if you don't? What if you come back in a coffin. The promises we made to kill the days between.
I try to distract myself from you, how you could be anywhere in the world being shot at. Oh Gee, it feels like a reopened wound. It feels like pins and needles in my heart. I can feel it tearing me apart.
The light blinds my tear filled eyes. This city's just not as pretty as it used to be. It's different here without you. Everyone misses you. Me and your brother the most. Why did you have to do it Gee? Why couldn't you stay here. Be safe and sound with me. No words left unsaid.
It's never a whisper, it's always a scream. 'Fuck" I think to myself as I sob in your name. In your beautiful name.
It's been so long.
"Goodnight" I said to Gerard, I knew he wouldn't hear me but maybe he would.
Somewhere in my aching heart and mind I knew my good friend Ray Toro would keep my love safe from harms way. Safe from gun wounds and grenades.
*****
I was awoken by light streaming in the windows and arms wrapped securely around my waist.
I slowly turned around. Quickly recognizing the scent.
"Gerard?"

Notes

if you haven't already figured it out gerard was on duty in the american armed forces. no i don't know which branch because 1. I'm not that familiar with the branches 2. i couldn't decide. oh and i didn't edit this so um sorry
link to the lyrics of the song:
This is the link