Please don't leave me

I sent the 7th text. Long emotional texts.
Read _/

I have ruined it all, everything!!
I throw my ipod across the room and bury my head in my hands and let the tears fall through my fingers.

He didn't want me to do it, he was so young and innocent I took all of it away without thinking as per usual.
I'm so selfish, I'm a monster.
"AGHHH!!" I scream repeatedly punching myself in the stomach trying to make myself cough up blood.
"Gerard?" My Mum says tapping the door. "Are you okay, love?"
She probably thinks I was whacking off from the noises I was making.
"Yes Mum."
"Can I come in?"
...
"N-Yeh okay."
She opens the door and peeks through to check on me.
"Gerard you need to get some sleep okay sweetie is 10:00 and you have school tomorrow."
Ugh school, Frank.
"Okay." I sigh tucking myself in and closing my eyes as her que to leave. I'll be staying awake all night though again, thinking it all through.

Notes