Chasing Stars

"They are so funny with the girls," Jamia stated as they all laughed. "Speaking of," Jamia said turning towards Kristin. "Are you two ever going to?" Jamia asked.

"Wow, way to be subtle," Christa stated.

"She's not known for her subtlety," Lindsey laughed.

“I’m just asking," Jamia said defensively. "They have been married awhile," she added.

"You don't have to be married to get knocked up," I blurted out without thinking. The four women turned towards me, looking at me like I was crazy. "You just have to have sex," I blurted out again.

"But you shouldn't," Kristin said after a moment of silence, this pulled everyones eyes away from me. "That is something that should wait."

"They both should wait, kids and sex," Lindsey stated still starring at me like I was an alien. I was worrying her and could see it. Between her and Gerard you would think they where scared I would be a slut.

"Right, because you didn't have sex before you where married," I stated.

“I didn't have sex when I was 15," she clarified.

"How did this just change into my sex life, you where talking about Kristin’s,” I said louder than I should have.

“It should be non -existent in your case," Lindsey stated heavily.

"Whatever, I’m getting something to eat." I stood up and walked back into the house. I entered the kitchen, not caring that it wasn't my house and started to rummage through the cupboards. Nothing was looking appealing as usual. I opened the refrigerator and then closed it. I turned leaning on the counter laying eyes on the last cupboard I had yet to open. Pulling it open I saw different types of liquor. I had never had any alcohol with the exception of the accidental drink from my mom's pop. I’ve smoked pot but never touched alcohol. It always smelled vial. My hands gently stroked over the labels. I wondered if I would ever like it, ever be an adult that puts it in there drink after a rough day at work? Would I be an alcoholic like my father?

"Hey did you find something?" Frank asked walking into the kitchen. I quickly dropped my hand and closed the cupboard. Frank gave me a skeptical look.

"Nope," I muttered opening the cupboard next to the one I just shut.

"What where you just doing?" Frank asked eyeing me.

"Looking for food," I said in a tone that rang confusion. I was praying he didn't catch on to my lie.

"No, you where just about to grab one of the liquor bottles out," Frank insinuated.

"Not true," I said with force. My statement was true. I didn't really know what I was doing but I was not about to pull one out.

"Then why was your hand on one?" Frank asked leaning against the counter. I was pissed. If he called me out for eyeing the liquor, then fine I deserved it. Would I admit to that? Hell no but that's not even what he did. He was saying that I was about to drink one. "Go back to the pool," Frank said pulling me out of my internal anger.

“I’m hungry," I stated refusing to move.

"Go. I’ll make everyone food." When I still didn't move he continued, "Or I can go grab your Dad." I rolled my eyes at him and walked passed him. I made it to the door before turning around.

“I really don't like you," I said to Frank before opening the door and walking down the hall towards the pool. As I entered the pool, I weighed my options. Sit with the girls who are lecturing me about sex or go into the water with the annoying children. I decided to take my risk with the kids, Gerard, Mikey and Ray. I walked over to the girls pulling my shorts off. Lindsey caught the glare I was sending her way.

"You okay?" Lindsey asked sounding annoyed.

"Perfect," I said shortly while pulling my shirt off. Lindsey looked taken aback by the sight.

"Rylynn…" she said but I didn't allow her to finish. I walked towards the deep end. Gerard must has seen me because by the time I reached the edge he was in the area. I jumped in, slashing him in the process. As I came back up for air, I noticed all the girls staring at me. I let out a small sigh.

"You know," Gerard said coming up near me. “I still completely support a wetsuit," he added with a smirk. A smile erupted on my face and I splashed him in the face. "Oh now you're gonna pay," he replied to my splash lunging forward towards me. I began to laugh uncontrollably as I swam just out of his reach. Of course my laughter had slowed me down and it wasn't long before I felt his hand grip my leg and prevent me from swimming forward.

"No no no no," I muttered out through giggles. His hands grabbed my waist.

"Oh are you sorry now?" he said with a smile. I shock my head while laughing. He suddenly picked me up throwing me in the air and making me slam back into the water and go under.

"Okay I’m sorry," I said with laughter as I came back up for air. Gerard smiled in triumph. I swam the short distance to Gerard, jumping on his back. I attempted to regain my breath as he swam us towards the group.

"Okay, small children out of the pool. Time for a break before the pizza gets here," Frank said walking with some juice boxes.

"Basketball?" Mikey asked to Gerard and myself as we approached.

"Sure," I said out of breath. Mikey jumped out of the pool for move the hoop over and grab a ball. We paired up, Mikey and myself vs. Gerard and Ray. We began to play and quickly Gerard and Ray where winning. "Time out," I said loudly.

"What there are no time outs. It's water basketball," Gerard yells back.

“I don't care," I yelled back while swimming to Mikey. "We need a plan or we are going to loss," Mike laughed at my forcefulness.

"Okay, I’ll get the ball from Ray and you wait by the hoop. I’ll pass to you and you shoot. Gerard wont try to stop you," Mikey suggested. I quickly nodded in agreement. We high-fived and got ready to continue playing.

"Are you done being ridiculous now?" Gerard asked holding the ball.

"Ready to get your ass kicked?" I replied causing him to give a genuine smile. Just like we planed it, the game played out. We still didn't win but we did get some points. It wasn't long before the food arrived and everyone climbed out of the pool to dry off. The kids all rushed to the kitchen, their mom's right behind them. I walked over to where my clothes where and looked around.

"Here," Gerard stated pulling a towel out of his bag.

"Thanks," I said shivering. I wrapped the towel around myself. Letting out a sigh I reached for my shirt and shorts to pull them on.

“It's just pizza, you don't have to get your clothes wet for that," Gerard said while drying off his hair.

“I ah…" I muttered looking down towards my stomach.

“If you are self conscious of the scars then here," he said handing me his sweatshirt. I reluctantly took it from him. "Just take it Ry," he added after steeling a glance at my face. I slide the sweatshirt on, it coming to my mid thigh. We walked towards the kitchen, Gerard grabbing my shoulders to guide me. Lindsey walked up with two plates.

"Here you go," she said handing one to me and one to Gerard. I leaned against the counter and took a bite. As everyone began to eat and talk, I looked around. These should have been the people I grew up with. This should have been my family. The laughter erupting around the kitchen was like heaven to my ears. I closed my eyes for a moment attempting to capture every aspect every element of the room in my memory.

Notes