Rebel love song

“So how was your weekend?” Sean asked. “It was okay.” I said. I wondered where Gerard was. He was later than usual. Or maybe that bastard had first period free…
Then a couple of minutes later, I spotted him by his locker. I stuttered out an excuse to Sean and went over to Gerard. “Hey.” I greeted. He didn’t notice me at first as he was too busy putting his leather jacket in his locker but when he turned around, a faint smile spread across his face. “Hey.” He said. I noticed the black rings under his eyes. “You okay?” I asked. “Mm? Yeah. Just tired.” I took his hand but he gently pulled it out. “Can you meet me on the balcony at lunch? I wanna talk to you about something.” He asked. I nodded, my heart racing in my chest. What the hell did he want to talk to me about? “Okay. See you then. I gotta get to class.” He half smiled and quickly squeezed my hand. “Bye.” I said, my voice slightly higher than usual. “Bye.” He said and walked off. I was guessing it was better for me to get to class too.
I was so nervous about what Gerard wanted to talk to me about, I couldn’t stay still for the entire English. “Dude, chill. She always says she’s gonna grade our homework but she never does.” Ray said. I nodded and tried to stay still after that. I didn’t even know what I was so nervous about… I mean we weren’t actually dating so theoretically he couldn’t break up with me… and maybe the thing he wanted to talk to me about wasn’t bad. Maybe he just wanted to talk and I was overthinking everything.
I managed to somehow push away those thoughts until lunch time. But as soon as the bell rang, they started creeping back into my head. I walked to the balcony. My hands were shaking so I put them in my pocket to hide it. The balcony was empty so he was probably still in class or on his way here. I leaned against the wall and watched some class run up and down the football field. “I sure wouldn’t want to be them right now.” Gerard’s voice broke the silence. “Do you have a habit of just showing up like that?” “I told you. It’s my great entrance.” He smiled and took a box of cigarettes out of his pocket. “Want?” “Um, no thank you.” I said. “Okay.” He lit the cigarette and put the box and the lighter back in his pocket. “So what did you want to talk to me about?” I asked nervously. “Um… Oh fuck, how to explain this…” He brushed his hand through his hair. “I don’t want to say asking you out was a mistake, because I had a great time, but uh… I shouldn’t have asked you out.” He said, looking down. I felt my heart drop. “Why not?” “Well... First things first, I’m not out to my parents yet, so if we were to, you know, start dating seriously, that would be kind of hard to explain. I mean I want to come out to them before, but I don’t have the guts. And the second thing is, I need to sort out some things with myself first before I’m ready for any sort of relationship. Don’t get me wrong, I really fucking like you, but I need to sort things out first.” “Okay.” I nodded. “Yeah. Sorry. As soon as I get everything okay, I’ll let you know.” He smiled sadly. “Take as much time as you need, okay? Don’t rush into anything, especially not coming out. Do it when you’re ready, okay?” “Yeah okay. So you understand?” He asked, his voice worried. “Yes and it’s okay. Just tell me when you sort things out because I really fucking like you too.” I smiled. He blushed and moved closer to me, almost pinning me against the wall. “Would it be totally wrong if I were to kiss you right now?” He smirked. “I’d be disappointed if you didn’t.” I smiled and wrapped my hands around his neck, pulling him closer to me. He kissed me, softly at first, but deepening the kiss soon, taking full dominance over it.
He eventually pulled away. “You might wanna go. Class starts soon.” He said. I nodded, still a little breathless from all that kissing. “Just one thing. Whatever this is about, you can always talk to me if you need to, you know that?” I said. He nodded. “Don’t worry, I’ll be okay.” He said and leaned in to press another quick kiss on my lips. “Okay.” I squeezed his hand. I heard the bell ring and kissed him again quickly. “See you.” “Yeah.” “Don’t you have class?” I ask. “P.E. I fucking hate that class.” He said. “Oh. Okay, I need to go. Bye!” “Bye.” He said, taking another cigarette from his pocket.

I did end up being late to biology, but I didn’t really care. “Dude , where were you?” Sean asked when I sat down next to him. “Balcony.” I said, putting my books onto the table. “You missed the best lunch ever.” “Oh yeah? What happened?” “You’re not even ready to hear this.” He started explaining about how two people I’ve never heard of, got in a fight over some girl I’ve never heard of, because she was dating both of them at the same time. “They’re like apes, man. They think that whoever establishes dominance, gets the girl. It’s like a nature documentary.” I nodded, although I didn’t really care. It was a fact that a lot of straight, horny, teenage boys were stupid, and I guess these two were no exception. Sean had just started describing the bloody consequences of their fight, when he was interrupted by the teacher. “Mr. Stewart, if you and your neighbor wanna talk, you can take it outside.” She said, glaring at us. “I was just telling Frank how interesting the…” He glanced at the board. “Appendix is.” He smiled at the teacher. The teacher shook her head at us and turned back to the blackboard. “Dude, how bad are you at biology?” I asked him. Sean shrugged. “Pretty bad. Why?” “Because the appendix is literally the most useless body part. Every idiot knows that.” Sean laughed. “Well, shit, I guess.” I scoffed and started paying attention to the, quite possibly, most boring class in the history of biology classes. Finally the bell saved us from our appendix related misery.
The rest of the day was pretty normal. I didn’t have any classes with Gerard and I didn’t see him anywhere in the hallways. Even if I would have, it was stupid to expect much, really. He did say that he didn’t want us to be dating at the time, and I, for once, actually respected that. Even though I wanted him even more after all the kissing, I guess I could hold off until he was ready too. And besides, I only knew him for a week, god knows if we should even attempt to be in a relationship after having known each other for so little time, even though I really, really liked him.
I realized I was overthinking everything again. I sighed and dug my earphones out of my pocket. Thanks god music was always able to take my mind off everything.
I finally arrived home, to much excitement of my dogs and my mom. She beamed at me. “What is it?” I asked, pulling my earphones out. She handed me a white envelope. “What’s that?” I asked. “Just open it.” She smiled. I did as she said and gasped at what was inside. “Oh my god, thank you!” I hugged her. “It’s nothing really.” She smiled. “No, it is! Thank you so much!” “You hungry?” She asked. I nodded, still grinning like an idiot.
Later, when I was in my room, I called Amy. “How’s my favorite shortie doing?” She asked. “You’re shorter than me so shut up.” I said. She laughed. “What are you doing this weekend?” I asked. “Nothing much. Why?” “Because I’m coming to Haverhill!” I said, looking at the plane tickets.

Notes

Oh look who finally showed up!
Sorry for not updating, school and shit and i'm hardly finding any time to write + i handwrite this story during class so i have to retype everything and change and fix and shit so yeah
i'll try to update faster next time but no promises
Nina xx