Death is Inevitable

Gerard pov


"Today's the day." I sigh, looking over at Gerard. "Yeah." He says quietly, not looking me in the face. I look over at him, a worried look on my face. "What's wrong?" I ask. "Nothing. It's just that I mean, I've been here for what seems like forever, im just a little nervous to explore the outside world." He says, still not looking at me. "It's ok. I know, I'm a little worried too, but it's going to be ok. We'll make it through and get to be free. We'll never have to come back here." He smiles at me and we both stand up, thinking about our futures that lie ahead of us.


I take a look around the room and think of all the memories I've had in it for these pasts few years. I've gone through many traumatic events in this single room. It's funny how only a few years, can feel like a lifetime especially when you can't recall any of your past. That really helps. I remember the first day I got sent here. Anything before that really is a blur in my memory, except for the part that im a..murderer. The only time I remember that Is when my 'other side' is taking over. It remembers that side of me, and the side I am currently remembers what I did after I came here. It's quite complicated actually, it's like different memories, different feelings, take over when my other side comes. I'm basically a whole new person. In myself that I am now, I can't recall what I did in the past. I can't recall my mothers name, my fathers name. I can't even remember where I lived. It's like they vanish from existence in my brain. I couldn't even remember who my brother was before I read the file, so it was quite interesting to find out a little bit about my past. Some things stay the same though, like I still have Mikey as my brother and the same mother and everything, but I just forgot, I guess you could say. It's strange that me and Frank both forgot our pasts, it's Like amnesia.


Well back to what happened on my first day,


~Beginning of flashback~


I was about to kill someone, with a knife. I can remember that much, but not the name of the person nor what they looked like. It's a blur. I took the knife and held it to their shoulder, speaking soft words to them like 'I'll rid you of your pain' and 'you're lucky I'm giving this joy to you' before I heard sirens behind me. Still holding the knife to his stomach, I look back and see officers coming behind me. I look back at my lucky victim, and see he now has tears streaming down his face. What's wrong, doesn't he want this? He sobs more, and I trail the knife down his stomach, before I hear footsteps right behind me. Quickly, I stick the knife into his stomach, and drag it down, leaving a trail of deeply cut skin and fresh Crimson red blood behind the knife. I smile to myself. The officers immediately handcuff me and a few paramedics quickly tend to the boy (oh so he's a boy apparently) and they examine his wound before getting him into the ambulance. The officers just drag me away and shove me into the small confined back seat of the foul smelling police car. I sit alone in the back thinking of what other people must of been in here. Criminals. I'm no criminal. I was doing a good deed, not a crime. Why can't they see that? I sit in the back of the police car in silence, even from my thoughts for the rest of the ride. "Welcome to Reese, Way." He tells me, smirking. "How do you know my last name? How do you even know who the fuck I am?" I yell, anger rising up in me. "You're EVERYWHERE. And you know what the best part is? We have your idiot murder brother Mikey too. Damn, did we get lucky." He says still smirking at me. He gets out and roughly jerks me out of the car before I walk to the place where I would meet my best friend and nearly kill myself many times.


As the police officer leads me into the intimidating building, I break out into a cold sweat. I've never been caught before for anything. I didn't do anything wrong! I don't belong here, im not crazy! The lead me down long hallways, where I finally reach my room. MY room. It makes this all more real. I walk into the room and see a boy with brown hair shaking slightly and sitting on one of the two beds in the room. The officers leave me alone, well with the boy, and they shut the door loudly behind me, before the boy jumps in fear. He looks at me with wide eyes, and I give him a glare. "I'm Brendon." He says timidly, holding out his arm. "Gerard." I say and give him a small grin. You know how I said before I hadn't had any friends before Frank? Well I lied. We just never speak of what happened to my first friend, Brendon.
Me and Brendon have been friends for about and become pretty close, like we could tell each other anything, any of our problems. The only thing was, I couldn't remember anything about what happened before I came here, and neither could he, maybe they put something in the food, I don't know. All I knew was that Brendon was the only one I could trust. We practically left our lives in the hands of one another. One day though, my 'other side' was in control, and I couldn't stop it. I woke up that morning and slowly walked over to Brendons bed. He looked up at me with wide eyes and embraced me tightly. I didn't hug back though like usually. "Gerard? What's wrong?" He asked getting a little more concerned as I only stared back blankly at him. I continue to stare at him, before I lunge over, grabbing a syringe that one of the doctors left on the table accidentally. I grab it and sink it into his skin, while he cries out in agony. I then pull it out and stab him on the side of the head before going back to his leg and dragging down. "Gee, please.." He says, his eyes closed as silent tears stream down his face. My face softens a bit as I'm brought back to my senses. I look down at Brendon, and I feel tears well up in my eyes. I did this. I'm a monster. I deserve to be here. I deserve to be alone, to be hated. No one will ever think of me as anyone else but a monster.


~End of flashback~

Notes

So you learn a little about Gerards past


im so happy rn tho, cuz I'm meeting CrankthatFrank, im meeting Dan and Phil when they come to the U.S. And I'm seeing sws live in November im crying.

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