Forgive Me

When I left my apartment building, the cold bit at me almost instantly. I knew I should go back upstairs and put on some more layers, however I simply pulled my coat around myself tighter and set off down the street. I knew this was something I’d regret later, but this was the type of idiotic mistake I made daily. I made my journey as if on auto-pilot. The amount of times I’d travelled it, I could probably do it with my eyes closed. I hadn’t tried, of course, but I’m sure I could.

When I reached the coffee shop that was practically my second home, I spotted my brother, Mikey, immediately. He was seated at our usual table, and I could see that he’d ordered for me. It wouldn’t have been hard for him seeing as I got the same thing every day – black coffee, no cream, no sugar. Just plain old black coffee.

Lost in thought and with my head bowed down, I set to join my brother. My daydream was abruptly broken by a thump against my side. A noise of exclaim escaped my dry, bitten lips, and I turned to see what had intruded my space. When I saw the young-looking boy, I could barely formulate a single word, never mind a competent response. The boy – or man – was barely 5 foot 4, and his jaw had dropped. I barely noticed the apologies spilling from his mouth. In that moment, all I could think was“I think I might have met the most beautiful man on the planet.”I had entered a new world entirely by looking into his eyes, which refused to meet mine. I couldn’t put a colour to them; a muddy mix of brown and green, all different shades.

“I-it’s fine, no harm done, see?” I reassured the anxious man, but before I could say another word, he had dashed off. Dazed, I walked the last few feet to my table in long strides. Mikey looked up at me. “Gerard?”

It took me a few seconds to comprehend that Mikey had said anything. “Yeah?” I asked, snapping out of my trance slightly.

“Are you okay?” he said with a chuckle.

“Huh? Yeah. Yeah, I’m fine, why wouldn’t I be?” …Let’s just say I’ve never been good at hiding things.

“Is this about Frank Iero?” he asked slowly, as if he was speaking to an imbecile.

“Who?” I asked with a furrowed brow.

“Frank Iero. The guy who just walked into you… like thirty seconds ago. Have you hit your head?” Concern was growing in Mikey’s voice.

“You know that guy?” I failed to hide my interest.

“Yeah. And so do you. Do you really not remember him?”

“I think I would remember that guy, Mikes,” I said quietly, taking a sip of my coffee.

“Gerard, you bullied him all through middle school.”

“What?” I spluttered.

“Gerard, you and your idiot friends bullied him so bad he had to transfer.”

A deep sorrow filled me, mixed with apologetic regret. Yeah, I had been a dick when I was a kid, but I’m not like that anymore. I got into a better group of friends and cleaned up my act. But how could I forget this? More importantly, how could I have found a single fault in this wonderful guy?

“Damn,” was the only reply I could muster.

“Yeah. Damn,” Mikey said with a slightly bitter tone.

“Do you think I could get him to forgive me? I’m not that kid anymore,” I reminded him.

“You can’t bully a kid then try to bang him ten years later,” Mikey reprimanded me.

“Who said I wanted to bang him?” I blurted.

“I know you. Whatever. I’m not helping you get close to this guy,” Mikey said sourly.

“I just want his forgiveness. I want him to know I’ve changed,” I pleaded. Mikey ignored this.

I knew I had to do everything in my power to earn Frank’s friendship, and I knew it would be tough, but I was prepared to make the effort. I wanted to prove this to Frank. I wanted to prove this to myself.

Notes

I uploaded this on the account Party-Ghoul-Jet-Kid but I can't get into that account any more, so I edited it and I'll be continuing it here!!