This Never Meant Nothin' To Ya'

Frank's POV

The disturbing thoughts swirled around in my head. My best friend... the man I love, is getting married.
Gerard knows I love him and I know he loves me too, but he's IN LOVE with LynZ. It had always been an unspoken truth between me and Gerard that we loved each other but I don't think Gerard knows I'm IN LOVE with him. It was hard for me to accept at first. I thought I was straight, but then Gerard came into my life. The moment I met him I felt a spark between us, but I guess he didn't .Gerard loves me the way a friend loves there best friend. The kind of love I have for him is unexplainable, the only thing I know for certain is that I can't do without him.
I wish LynZ had never come into our lives. We met her a long time ago and the truth is, I actually like her. I wish it was easier to hate her. But really Gerard?! Two months?!
I got up from my bunk and stormed out of the bunk room, grabbing the arm of my silver haired best friend who was watching TV. He looked baffled but I guess he saw the sad look in my eyes and so he followed me off the tour bus and into the parking lot. I could feel the 3 pairs of eyes, belonging to our other band mates, staring at me as I led him outside.
"What's this about Frank?" He asked me.
"I need to talk to you Gee." I sat on a curb and pulled out a pack of cigarettes before offering him one and lighting them for us both.
"Ok, what is it?" I looked at the ground, a sullen look on my face as he sat down next to me.
“You’re my best friend Gee, but… are you happy?”
"What do you mean Frankie?” God I love it when he calls me Frankie.
“It’s just not like you to… I dunno, fall in love and want to get married at all, let alone so soon. Common Gee, what’s up? You only started dating her two months ago. Please just tell me what’s happening?” he sighs.
“Frankie, I’m sorry if you feel like I’ve been blocking you out. The truth is… I’ve just been having problems. Y’know, problems that I’ve had in the past. The depression is coming back, the need to drink, I-I’ve been having a hard time keeping off the pills, things like that. But you are my best friend and I really am sorry if I haven’t been acting like it.” I smile a little knowing that I haven’t lost him completely.
“But Gee, why didn’t you tell anybody you were having problems? And if you aren’t happy, then why are you getting married?” I was getting a little teary eyed now at the idea of him sinking back into old habits.
“That’s the thing Frankie, when I’m with LynZ, I am happy. She makes me happy. And… she makes me not want to um… do that stuff to myself.” That hit me hard. It made me sad to think that LynZ could do that for him and I couldn’t. Though I hate to admit it, I would do anything if it meant Gerard being happy. My breathing is shaky but I manage to let out a sigh that doesn’t sound like I’m about to cry. I stand up.
“Alright, Gee. That’s all I needed. I just want you to be happy.” I drop my cigaret to the ground and stomp on it. “Promise you’ll tell me everything from now on?”“Yeah, I promise. I shouldn’t have kept this from you.”
“It’s okay.” It’s not okay.

Notes

Hi everybody! Tell me what you think! This is my first frerard!