the sound of your name could silence my demons

Gerard was staring at his reflection in the vanity mirror. Analysing every feature, faking confidence. He smudged his eyeliner and painted his cheekbones with glitter. Red strings of hair were falling form his wannabe loose bun. He'd been starving himself for months to get this job and he needed not to fuck up this time. It was his last chance to make a living. Being a highschool dropout makes it impossible to find a job these days. He promised to himself that if he fucks up, he would end the pain and simply commit suicide.
"Gerard, you're in in 5."
He was snaped out of his thoughts by his bosses voice.
He knew he needed to enlighten his mood, he couldn't go out on stage and strip while feeling suicidal. With that said, Gerard looked down to his hipbones, prominently showing through his too short leather skirt, to gain some confidence. He tucked his shirt into his skirt , rose up to his feet and walked to the side of the stage, the noise of his heels clicking keeping pace with his breath.
"Party Poison!"
Hearing his stage name, Gerard made his way up and started pole dancing as well as he knew, hoping to get decent payment so he could keep his apartament.
The thing that surprised him was that people were actually clapping and giving him looks that he wouldn't be proud to talk about with his mother.
But that was true. Everybody wanted to fuck the new redhead stripper. He was so good at that, everybody got aroused. And it wasn't a pretty view, considering the fact that two thirds of the clients of this strip club were nasty old rich men. Gerard wanted to burst into tears but he kept dancing, he needed this. He tried focusing on the lights. Such pretty lights. With that in mind Gerard made it throught the 30 minutes of hell that was his first show.
He couldn't wait to see how much money he made, as he was being paid per show. When he got into the changing room, he saw an envelope on his vanity with a writing on it. It said "Gerard Way" so he opened only to find fucking 5 dollars there. He wanted to cry, he wanted to cry so fucking much. This is not enough, this is definetly not enough. He coulnd't afford to pay his debt! Hell, he couldn't afford to pay his fucking rent with 5 dollars a day!
He wanted to cut. He needed to cut, but he couldn't. Cos even if it only were 5 dollars a day, it was the only income he's seen in months, and he wasn't allowed to have scars on his body if he wanted to keep the job.
He went outside to cry. As he was curling up against the black fence, he saw someone looking at him. Across the street there was a foster home. A bit ironically, if you ask me. One of the kids was standing at the window, staring at Gerard. Gerard couldn't help but stare back at the kid, feeling lost in his eyes and for a bit forgetting about how shitty his life was.

Notes

hey, babes! hope you like this story.
XOXOG