In My Mind Only

"Frankie?" I asked him as he continued shaking against my arm. He didn't seem to register my voice as another loud sound of thunder roared through the sky, and that was when I heard him slightly whimper.

"Frank, it's all right. The thunder isn't going to hurt you," I told him as I hesitantly wrapped my other arm around him, protectively. He went from clutching my arm to my shirt. Suddenly, the lights turned back on and the only noise being made was the sound of my refrigerator starting back up..

"I'm sorry..." He said lowly as he let go of my shirt and moved away.

"No, that's okay. Why are you so scared of thunder?" I asked. He seemed hesitant in telling me, but he turned towards me and took a deep breath.

"When I was a little boy, my parents went out on another business trip. Throughout the whole time they were gone, it stormed. Hard. I was all alone in that God forsaken place, and the thunder was so loud and so close that the house shook constantly. I thought it was going to collapse on me and I would die before I had to chance to do anything with my life. I'm... terrified of thunder because all it does is remind me how alone I really am." I listen to him ramble on and on, before it finally hit me that he was just a little boy. He wasn't the tough, angry-looking, egotistical teenage boy that he made himself out to be, he was just a lonely boy. He missed his parents, he wanted a family, and a home.

"You... really love your parents, don't you?" I asked him. He looked up at me with a confused face and then he made a face as if he only realized that himself.

"Yeah, I...do. I just don't see why they have to leave me alone all the time," he said, "Why buy such a big house if it's all for one person? Why not just stay home and have regular jobs like a cashier or a housekeeper or whatever normal jobs are," then he sighed. "I'm sorry. I really shouldn't be complaining to you." I shook my head and put my hand on his shoulder.

"Don't be sorry. You're finally acting human. In all these years I've been at this school, I kept hearing about the amazing cadets in JROTC and then I heard about you. The boy who ranked fast, and when I finally met you, I was surprised. Honestly, I was a little shocked by your stoic behavior and aloof attitude. But, right now, I'm really proud of you. All of this "complaining" is something you should do more often," I told him. He shrugged his shoulders in response and looked down at his hands in his lap." I sighed and put my hand on his, squeezing them. He looked up at me and I smiled at him. He gave me a little twitch of his lips and I accepted it as a smile. I pulled my hand away and broke eye contact with him.

"Mr. Wa-ah, um, Gerard. You're still into Ray, right?" he asked. I looked over at him again and raise my brow at him.

"Yeah, why?" I asked. He cleared his throat and gestured down with his head. I looked down at myself and saw that my arousal was showing. What the hell?

"I-I was just thinking that I would've loved to be in this situation with Ray. Perfect time to kiss him, is what I thought about- I mean, just a romantic setting and, and-" then he raised up his hand to silence me and I did. He gave me a sincere smile and I smiled back.

"I get it. This really would've been the good setting. Just... don't ramble on like you just did. It'll kill whatever mood would've been created," he explained. I nodded my head in understanding. I made him feel awkward, and I don't even know where my erection came from. I sighed, running my hands through my hair before looking over at him once again. He was turning the television back on to continue the movie when the thunder roared once more and he stilled himself, shutting his eyes tightly and putting his hands over his ears. It was then that the power went out again and an even louder sound of thunder sounded across the sky, making Frank abandon what I'm sure he thought was his brave self and launched himself over at me, hugging me tightly. I hesitantly wrapped one of my arms around his shoulder while using my other to keep us upright.

"Frankie, are you okay? It's just thunder. It won't hurt you, I promise," I said, trying to calm him down, seeing as he was shaking so violently against me.

"This is really embarrassing, Gerard. I can't not be afraid of thunder. It's been imprinted into my memories, into my fears, and into my life. All it will ever do is remind me exactly how alone I am," he said quietly, almost whispering. I pulled back a little bit, making him look at me.

"You're not alone this time, are you? I'm right here, and I'm not going on any business trips." He didn't say anything, but instead nodded. It irritates me a little bit to know that his parents were perfectly fine with having him stay home alone. Did they even know about his phobia of thunderstorms? I held him a little tighter and he quickly pulled away. Did I squeeze too tight?

"Stop it," he said. I gave him a questioning look, and then noticed that the lights were still off and just shook my head and my ridiculousness. I was wondering if I should ask when it thundered again. Instead of coming into my arms like I expected, I felt him move behind me and clutch to my shirt.

I understood. He didn't want me to see him as a scared little boy. I stay facing the front, even when the lights turned on and he didn't move from his spot.

"Frankie?"

"Yeah?"

"Are you okay?" I asked. I wanted to turn around more than anything and hold him, because he really deserved it.

"I'm fine. I just have to get through this storm," he explained as his grip tightened on my shirt.

"I'm here this time, you know. You aren't alone," I whispered.

"Thanks, Gerard..." He whispered back. Hearing that sent shivers throughout my entire body, and I suddenly felt warm despite the cold of the rain entering the room. I smiled softly. I'd completely misjudged Frank and I was happy that this was who he really was.

Notes

So... Today is my birthday! <3 I'm now 18! Legal ;D
Anyways, enjoy! Feedback would be sexy :3

-OAIF <3