Hickeys. Bruises.

As I stared at my reflection in the mirror of my bathroom, I couldn’t help but feel disgusting. Disgusting and wrong. All of them were wrong.

As if it wasn’t enough, my father beat me up again, the moment I came home last night. It was late, I wasn’t expecting him to be awake by that time, but I was so wrong. He was, again, having one of his drinking “business meetings“ as he called them. Every time stating that he needs to work and call all of his clients, he ended up locked in his study, drinking himself into coma. He would often pass out, but sometimes he would come down and drink more downstairs, terrorizing my mom, and if I came by, beating the shit out of me also. I thought these days ended, but as it seems like, they didn’t.

Few weeks ago I decided that my usual make-up routine wasn’t good enough anymore, so I checked out the latest trends in make-up, and found out the girls have been using some weirdly looking sponge. I bought it, just to see if it really worked, and as I used it, I was more satisfied with the results then I would be if I used my fingers.

As I was layering the make-up everywhere where I needed to cover the bruises, I was still surprised nobody noticed yet. Not even Gerard, who was all over me pretty much every time we were alone, I mean yes, I made sure he wasn’t always kissing my neck and all the spots that were bruised, but my make-up skills couldn’t be that good, and make-up doesn’t last forever, especially when it becomes wet.

Gerard.

Dull pain ran through my body. My boyfriend, Gerard. I cheated on him. And he has no idea. As I stared at my reflection once again, I started to feel my eyes water. I didn’t know whether or whether not to tell him about what happened last night. After our fight, and later seeing me picking up his daughter, he was just so pissed that I didn’t hear from him. He usually sends a text goodnight and good morning, but this time nothing. My mind flew again to what happened last night, when I was picking up Amelia.

Amelia. That bitch.

I got so angry that I sent my fist into the mirror, which seconds later, ended up in sharp pieces.

*

„Frank! HEY, FRANK!“ I heard Sam’s voice thundering through the high school hallway. I ignored it. I heard few more shouts and then I turned around the corner to get to the cafeteria. Or so I thought.

„FRANK!“ I heard almost inches away from my face, I felt a sharp grip on my shirt and all of sudden I was pierced on the white-brick wall by, World behold, no one else but Dean Winchester.

„What the fuck.“ What? I don’t know, maybe I don’t want to talk to either of you. And just as I thought that, Sam appeared in my sight.

„Frank, what’s going on?“ Sam asked, his voice filled with concern. On the other way, Dean’s was full of anger.

„You don’t text back, you don’t answer our calls, you don’t answer when we’re standing under your fucking window.“ He spat.

„Dean.“ Sam called on his older brother in his usual calm voice, and also giving away one of his stares. The one where he bows his head to the left, and pulls out total bitchface.

„WHAT?! You can’t say he doesn’t deserve that.“

„I’m not saying that. I’m just saying that you don’t need to create a scene in the busiest hallway.“

I, for myself, can say that I deserve everything Dean’s been giving me so far. It’s been a week, almost week and a half. I barely spoke to Gerard, and I completely ignored both of Sam and Dean. But Dean probably came to conclusion, that his little brother is right, and let go of me, but still keeping quite a short distance between us, probably in case if I wanted to disappear.

“Frank, what’s going on? What happened at that party?” Sam continued in his smooth, calming voice. After a very long inhale, followed by just as deep exhale, I shrugged my shoulders and spoke in depressed, low voice.

“Not here. I will come to your house and tell you everything, deal?”

The boys had a bit worried looks on their faces. After that they stole a quick glance on each other, and then Dean took a few steps backwards.

“Deal, but Frank, if you try to get out of this even this time, and ignore us again, I’ll find a gigantic rubber dick, and I will shove it up your ass, got it?” Dean threatened with pointy finger. I couldn’t help but smile. I missed him and his rude vocabulary.

“Don’t worry, I’ll come. You guys okay with fourth-ish?” Dean and Sam nodded and then let me go so I could have some food, Sam said that Dean forgot their lunch money at home, so they will have to be eating at home today, and so I went alone.

*

With shaking hands, I stepped closer to the doorbell. I was terrified. What will they say about it? What will they think about me? Will they hate me for what I did? After solid ten minutes I forced my hand to ring the bell. I heard some shouting and then a bunch of drumming sounds, probably as they ran down the staircase.

Not longer after these sounds, the front door opened, revealing two smiley heads, one taller and one slightly shorter. I could say that they were excited to see me, but there was some tension that was radiating off the boys. They were clearly worried because of what they were about to hear.

“Heeyyy, come in!” Sam said, hand motioning me inside. That was rare, I usually just got in myself, because I knew where they kept their side key. Their dad was most of the time gone, so no one minded if I let myself in.

I followed them up the stairs into Sam’s room. They probably thought that it was friendlier than Dean’s room. Which I kind of disagree with, because his room was blank, at all times clean and not at all personal. I liked Dean’s room way more.

As we stepped into the room, the weird feeling washed all over me again. I was definitely scared.

“So, um, you want something to drink, or...” Sam trailed off on the end of the sentence. My throat was sore, dry but I declined. As fast as I got this story off my chest, the faster I was out of here. This time I didn’t have any intention in staying here after what I had to say.

“I guess we should get right into the point.” I breathed out. I couldn’t hold it in anymore. Guys didn’t seem very pleased with my eagerness, they sensed that nothing good was coming from this story. The boys just nodded, signalizing for me to start, and so I did.

“So… As you know I went to that party with Amelia. I had to pick her up, and that was the first trigger, Gerard saw me in the car, and even through two windows, of my car and their front home window, I could tell he was pissed, off limits.

After we arrived, I spent some time with the people that were there and Amelia, drank a bit, just a couple of beers, and I can say that I was clearly still sober. But then, probably an hour into the party, I started to feel a bit too overwhelmed, so I went upstairs. I found a quiet room and planned on relaxing a bit.” I blurted out in one giant exhale. I was talking very fast, sometimes I could say that Sam and Dean had a bit rough time to catch up to what I was saying. After one big inhale I continued telling the story.

“But Amelia found me. I will keep this part short. She wanted to know, when I’m going to sleep with her. Like, you know, sleep with her.” Boys started to fidget uncomfortably. “We had a fight, and I was about to leave, when she said, that if I won’t have sex with her right then and there, she will tell everyone that I’m gay.” Sam and Dean stared at me with their mouths hang open. They were in shock, just as I was, when I heard these words making their way from her mouth.

“But… how did she know?” Sam asked after proceeding the information.

“I have no idea. Probably because we’ve been together over half year, and it didn’t happen. Or she was just guessing.” I ran my hand over my face, trying to rub the stress away.

“Anyway, the fight continued, and then she pulled out my father – what he would do if he knew I am gay. And… she threatened again, that she will tell if I don’t fuck her.” The boys froze in that moment, I could sense they knew what was coming.

My hands were shaking so bad I couldn’t keep them in one position. There were drops of sweat on my forehead, and over all, I was about to faint. I took a deep breath and spoke again.

“And... I did it.”

I waited for Sam and Dean to react. Nothing. They were completely speechless. Their stares were blank. Sam was completely frozen, I didn’t even think that he was breathing. And then, finally, after a time that felt like eternity, Dean hang his head low, staring into the ground, rubbing his neck.

“Oh my God.” The quiet voice of Dean echoed in Sam’s plain room.

Notes

Sup guys! I'm sorry, I wanted to update few days ago, but (if you're interested, if not skip to another paragraph!) my hamster girl died just last night, she was ill so I dedicated all of my time to look after her. She was fighting as a warrior, but unfortunately she lost the battle. And I would love to dedicate this chapter to her, so... Míša, I hope you're better off wherever you are just now.

So, sorry again. I just wasn't in mood for writing. But here it is! Be ready because the shit's about to go down in next chapter!