You Are A Beautiful Human ((Frerard))
Chapter 5
Gee POV
I lay in a camp bed in frank’s room, him asleep on the bed next to me, morning sun streaming in through the window and I’d be lying if I say I’m not dying of embarrassment over everything that happened the previous day. From the awkward drawing incident to the fucking emotional breakdown, I wish I could delete it and just have a calm and collected pizza with the guy I fancy. I suppose there is a silver lining, I get to spend most of the week with my crush. All I have to do is not fuck it up. Easier said than done.
I look up at frank sleeping, he just rolled over to face me and I think he’s waking up. He’s laying in fetal position, his eyes shut, a tiny smile on his lips. A few thin strands of his dark hair fall across his face and the rest fan out on the pillow. It feels weird seeing him without sunglasses on, his eyes look quite round and big but they’re shut so it’s hard to tell. I can see all of his eyebrows. On fleek, us internet kids would say. He starts to stir and I realise he’s waking up.
“Morning” I whisper and his eyelids flutter open almost instinctively and I take a sharp intake of breath. He quickly shuts them again, almost immediately, but I get a glimpse that remains stained on my memory. His irises are pigmented with a gorgeous shade of hazel, with almost golden hues, glowing in the bright sunlight. They are big and a tiny bit off centre, his pupils slightly dilated but before I could take them in, his lids closed swiftly.
“Morning” He mumbles, fumbling for his sunglasses and sitting up.
Suddenly, the room is filled with the loud clanging of an alarm clock, snapping us out of our stupor. His hand shoots sideways, knocking some things on his bedside table over but silencing the noise promptly. I let out a soft giggle. Moments later Frank’s mum comes in.
“Frank, your tutor’s gonna be here in 45minutes so get the fuck up soon, Gee, I don’t know what you wanna do today, you can come and watch telly with me or maybe sit in on Frank lessons, up to you really” She smiles. Frank grumbles and stands up and I see he’s wearing an oversized tee which looks freaking adorable on him and his boxers. I smile mischievously, poor frankie having to do classes while I just sit on tumblr. Maybe this whole suspension thing isn’t so bad after all.
“Unfair much” He grumbles.
“It’s alright, it’ll be boring for me sitting around with nothing to do” I reply trying to make him feel better.
“Better than algebra”
I sit on my phone while Frank gets ready in the bathroom and his mum goes downstairs, unsure of what to do with myself. After a few minutes, he appears at the doorway in skinny jeans, a long sleeved misfits tee and a beanie.
“Wow you look nice” I compliment.
“Thanks, my hair felt kinda greasy so I just stuck this beanie, I can’t be arsed to wash it at this unholy hour” He tells me.
“It looks cool” I smile.
“Okay, Gee this is a bit of a weird request but you may have noticed a lip ring yesterday” He starts. I had noticed “Is there any way you could put it in for me before I cut my face open?”
“Sure” I reply, hopping up. He places the ring in my hand and pulls his lip where the hole is. I step forward and hold my breath, remembering I hadn’t brushed my teeth yet. I smell his minty breath as I carefully bring the ring up to his slightly chapped lip and take a moment to savour the intimacy, taking in every feature of his face. As I hover, my lips centimetres from his, I ache to kiss him right there but painfully, I resist the urge. Cautiously, I push the metal through the hole and it slips in easily.
“Done!” I announce once it’s securely in place. He nibbles it almost seductively and smiles.
“Thanks, I would ask you to do the nose ring too but that’s kinda gross” He laughs. Just then I realise I need some clothes to put on other than the school uniform I’ve been wearing all day and night.
“I- Is there any chance I could borrow a change of clothes” I ask timidly.
“Oh yeah sure! In the bottom drawer there’s a bunch of clean stuff” He gestures to the cabinet. I thank him and pull out a tee, some joggers and a large looking hoodie. He’s only short and thin and I’m neither of those things so I try and play it safe. I head into the bathroom, wash and get dressed before seeing an eyeliner pencil next to the sink and grab the opportunity. I step back from the mirror, feeling pretty good about myself. Its illogical me caring this much about my appearance and impressing frank considering he can’t fucking see but hopefully it still gives me a more confident vibe. Once I’m ready we head downstairs where Debbie is sat eating cereal and watching good morning Britain.
“Wow Gee, you look nice! By the way, there’s rice crispies and cornflakes on the side, milk in the fridge and bowls on the drainer, feel free to help yourself” she explains cheerily.
“Thanks, is there any coffee?” I ask timidly. I can’t survive without the stuff.
“Yep, next to the kettle” she replies. I get myself some coffee and Frank and I some cornflakes, making sure to use the almond milk for his. We sit out in the kitchen eating in a comfortable silence for a few moments before Frank pipes up.
“My mum said you look nice, what do you look like?” He asks. I think for a moment.
“I have bright red dyed hair that goes down to like my neck and is kinda damaged from bleaching, quite thick eyebrows, mucky hazel coloured eyes which currently have eyeliner on, that’s probably why your mum said I look nice, I have a small but pointy nose with a tiny pimple on the end that I’m not sure if I love or hate, my mouth is kinda small and I don’t realise but when I talk a lot of the time its lopsided like only one side moves which is a bit awkward, everyone says, well mostly people online, my jaw is really defined but I think I look like a potato” I ramble.
“You sound very good looking, What do you normally wear?” he asks. My heart flutters at the compliment even though it’s meaningless.
“Skinny jeans I guess, leather jackets, I’d love to look really androgynous though” I murmur “Right now though I’m wearing a hoodie and jogging bottoms though”
“Oh okay that’s all I really own to be honest” he laughs “So how do I look?” I’m taken aback by the question and have no idea what to say. I don’t think ‘sexy’ would be an appropriate reply.
“Uh your eyebrows are on point like I saw them for a second when you first woke up before you put your sunglasses back on” I mumble, unsteadily.
“Thanks, what about my like fashion? It’s really paranoid of me but for all I know I could look like a my little pony, but you have good taste so I’m hoping you’d warn me if I’m dressed like a douche”
“No no no, you look really awesome, really punky especially with the piercings”
“Yeah I try to stick to band tees then you can’t go far wrong” He smiles and we get lost in a conversation about bands. It’s odd, I’m either gabbling or staring. One of the bright sides of Frank being blind is that I can just stare at him, take in every feature, map every imperfection in my mind so when I close my eyes I can see an image of him I’ll never forget and he doesn’t even know. I feel guilty, it’s pretty creepy to be honest.
After a few minutes, I hear someone arrive and Frank’s tutor walks into the kitchen. He’s quite tall with blonde hair and a suit. He looks in his late 40s but kinda chill. I scurry into the living room to get out the way.
Frank POV
Classes finish around lunchtime and I spend the rest of the day chatting with Gee. Their personality is intoxicating, they seem to be relaxing and the more relaxed they are the chattier they seem to get and the chattier they get the more enthralled I become. We discuss bands, as always, and sip coffee all afternoon. I learn a lot about them, not so much facts about them but more how they tick, the mannerisms and habits they have. It’s fun having a friend. And that’s the saddest statement I’ve ever made. I think back to what my mum told me last night. That they like me. I’m not sure how I feel about that. I mean I’m touched. I think I might like them too. But why me? They’re genuinely an amazing person, why would they be interested in little me. To be honest, I doubt they really are, okay my mum is normally good at judging this kinda stuff but I’ve also not spoken to anyone in 3 years, so no wonder when I finally do she thinks somethings up. This would never work out, anyway, the universe clearly hates us both, we’re a match made in fucking hell.
I decide to ask my mum for advice.
“Stay here, lemme just go and ask my mum about something” I say and navigate into the living room. “Mum?” I ask as I enter.
“Yes hun?”
“You know uh yesterday you mentioned something about Gee l-liking-”
“Oh my god, you like them back! I knew it!” She squeals, cutting me off.
“No I uh d-don’t I just erm-”
“Yes you so do Frank don’t even try and lie!”
“Okay maybe I do, but how do you know they do?”
“I think I can tell when someone fancies my son, my mother’s senses are tingling. Besides, who draws someone they’ve known for a matter of days if they don’t have a massive crush on them? Plus, they’ve hardly taken their eyes off you the whole time they’ve been here” she explains. She does have a convincing case but I still find it hard to believe.
“But why me?”
“Because you’re a talented, interesting, handsome young man who doesn’t realise how awesome he is”
“Thanks but you’re my mum of course you’d say that”
“It’s true”
***
The evening went smoothly and we went to bed pretty early. Gee put on some twenty one pilots as we lay in bed. It feels like a sleepover, I mean in a way it is but the previous night we both fell asleep immediately, we’d had a long day but now we lay awake. I can hear the scratching of a pencil on paper and assume Gee’s drawing. I sit and visualise them, knowing full well they most likely look nothing like the image in my head. I imagine a figure sat cross legged, bright red locks of hair hiding their face, leaving only a slight one sided smile and a pointy chin and nose visible. I don’t know why but I feel my heart twist as I remember I will never know if the image is accurate. My lack of sight hasn’t really got to me much recently. I just try to avoid thinking about it, obviously I sometimes miss it but not as much as I used to, that’s why I’m so surprised at the intensity of the emotion I’m feeling now. It’s a mixture of despair and aching for something I will never have, and I haven’t felt this way in ages. Fuck Gee for coming into my life and messing with my emotions. Or maybe just fuck Gee.
I lay in a camp bed in frank’s room, him asleep on the bed next to me, morning sun streaming in through the window and I’d be lying if I say I’m not dying of embarrassment over everything that happened the previous day. From the awkward drawing incident to the fucking emotional breakdown, I wish I could delete it and just have a calm and collected pizza with the guy I fancy. I suppose there is a silver lining, I get to spend most of the week with my crush. All I have to do is not fuck it up. Easier said than done.
I look up at frank sleeping, he just rolled over to face me and I think he’s waking up. He’s laying in fetal position, his eyes shut, a tiny smile on his lips. A few thin strands of his dark hair fall across his face and the rest fan out on the pillow. It feels weird seeing him without sunglasses on, his eyes look quite round and big but they’re shut so it’s hard to tell. I can see all of his eyebrows. On fleek, us internet kids would say. He starts to stir and I realise he’s waking up.
“Morning” I whisper and his eyelids flutter open almost instinctively and I take a sharp intake of breath. He quickly shuts them again, almost immediately, but I get a glimpse that remains stained on my memory. His irises are pigmented with a gorgeous shade of hazel, with almost golden hues, glowing in the bright sunlight. They are big and a tiny bit off centre, his pupils slightly dilated but before I could take them in, his lids closed swiftly.
“Morning” He mumbles, fumbling for his sunglasses and sitting up.
Suddenly, the room is filled with the loud clanging of an alarm clock, snapping us out of our stupor. His hand shoots sideways, knocking some things on his bedside table over but silencing the noise promptly. I let out a soft giggle. Moments later Frank’s mum comes in.
“Frank, your tutor’s gonna be here in 45minutes so get the fuck up soon, Gee, I don’t know what you wanna do today, you can come and watch telly with me or maybe sit in on Frank lessons, up to you really” She smiles. Frank grumbles and stands up and I see he’s wearing an oversized tee which looks freaking adorable on him and his boxers. I smile mischievously, poor frankie having to do classes while I just sit on tumblr. Maybe this whole suspension thing isn’t so bad after all.
“Unfair much” He grumbles.
“It’s alright, it’ll be boring for me sitting around with nothing to do” I reply trying to make him feel better.
“Better than algebra”
I sit on my phone while Frank gets ready in the bathroom and his mum goes downstairs, unsure of what to do with myself. After a few minutes, he appears at the doorway in skinny jeans, a long sleeved misfits tee and a beanie.
“Wow you look nice” I compliment.
“Thanks, my hair felt kinda greasy so I just stuck this beanie, I can’t be arsed to wash it at this unholy hour” He tells me.
“It looks cool” I smile.
“Okay, Gee this is a bit of a weird request but you may have noticed a lip ring yesterday” He starts. I had noticed “Is there any way you could put it in for me before I cut my face open?”
“Sure” I reply, hopping up. He places the ring in my hand and pulls his lip where the hole is. I step forward and hold my breath, remembering I hadn’t brushed my teeth yet. I smell his minty breath as I carefully bring the ring up to his slightly chapped lip and take a moment to savour the intimacy, taking in every feature of his face. As I hover, my lips centimetres from his, I ache to kiss him right there but painfully, I resist the urge. Cautiously, I push the metal through the hole and it slips in easily.
“Done!” I announce once it’s securely in place. He nibbles it almost seductively and smiles.
“Thanks, I would ask you to do the nose ring too but that’s kinda gross” He laughs. Just then I realise I need some clothes to put on other than the school uniform I’ve been wearing all day and night.
“I- Is there any chance I could borrow a change of clothes” I ask timidly.
“Oh yeah sure! In the bottom drawer there’s a bunch of clean stuff” He gestures to the cabinet. I thank him and pull out a tee, some joggers and a large looking hoodie. He’s only short and thin and I’m neither of those things so I try and play it safe. I head into the bathroom, wash and get dressed before seeing an eyeliner pencil next to the sink and grab the opportunity. I step back from the mirror, feeling pretty good about myself. Its illogical me caring this much about my appearance and impressing frank considering he can’t fucking see but hopefully it still gives me a more confident vibe. Once I’m ready we head downstairs where Debbie is sat eating cereal and watching good morning Britain.
“Wow Gee, you look nice! By the way, there’s rice crispies and cornflakes on the side, milk in the fridge and bowls on the drainer, feel free to help yourself” she explains cheerily.
“Thanks, is there any coffee?” I ask timidly. I can’t survive without the stuff.
“Yep, next to the kettle” she replies. I get myself some coffee and Frank and I some cornflakes, making sure to use the almond milk for his. We sit out in the kitchen eating in a comfortable silence for a few moments before Frank pipes up.
“My mum said you look nice, what do you look like?” He asks. I think for a moment.
“I have bright red dyed hair that goes down to like my neck and is kinda damaged from bleaching, quite thick eyebrows, mucky hazel coloured eyes which currently have eyeliner on, that’s probably why your mum said I look nice, I have a small but pointy nose with a tiny pimple on the end that I’m not sure if I love or hate, my mouth is kinda small and I don’t realise but when I talk a lot of the time its lopsided like only one side moves which is a bit awkward, everyone says, well mostly people online, my jaw is really defined but I think I look like a potato” I ramble.
“You sound very good looking, What do you normally wear?” he asks. My heart flutters at the compliment even though it’s meaningless.
“Skinny jeans I guess, leather jackets, I’d love to look really androgynous though” I murmur “Right now though I’m wearing a hoodie and jogging bottoms though”
“Oh okay that’s all I really own to be honest” he laughs “So how do I look?” I’m taken aback by the question and have no idea what to say. I don’t think ‘sexy’ would be an appropriate reply.
“Uh your eyebrows are on point like I saw them for a second when you first woke up before you put your sunglasses back on” I mumble, unsteadily.
“Thanks, what about my like fashion? It’s really paranoid of me but for all I know I could look like a my little pony, but you have good taste so I’m hoping you’d warn me if I’m dressed like a douche”
“No no no, you look really awesome, really punky especially with the piercings”
“Yeah I try to stick to band tees then you can’t go far wrong” He smiles and we get lost in a conversation about bands. It’s odd, I’m either gabbling or staring. One of the bright sides of Frank being blind is that I can just stare at him, take in every feature, map every imperfection in my mind so when I close my eyes I can see an image of him I’ll never forget and he doesn’t even know. I feel guilty, it’s pretty creepy to be honest.
After a few minutes, I hear someone arrive and Frank’s tutor walks into the kitchen. He’s quite tall with blonde hair and a suit. He looks in his late 40s but kinda chill. I scurry into the living room to get out the way.
Frank POV
Classes finish around lunchtime and I spend the rest of the day chatting with Gee. Their personality is intoxicating, they seem to be relaxing and the more relaxed they are the chattier they seem to get and the chattier they get the more enthralled I become. We discuss bands, as always, and sip coffee all afternoon. I learn a lot about them, not so much facts about them but more how they tick, the mannerisms and habits they have. It’s fun having a friend. And that’s the saddest statement I’ve ever made. I think back to what my mum told me last night. That they like me. I’m not sure how I feel about that. I mean I’m touched. I think I might like them too. But why me? They’re genuinely an amazing person, why would they be interested in little me. To be honest, I doubt they really are, okay my mum is normally good at judging this kinda stuff but I’ve also not spoken to anyone in 3 years, so no wonder when I finally do she thinks somethings up. This would never work out, anyway, the universe clearly hates us both, we’re a match made in fucking hell.
I decide to ask my mum for advice.
“Stay here, lemme just go and ask my mum about something” I say and navigate into the living room. “Mum?” I ask as I enter.
“Yes hun?”
“You know uh yesterday you mentioned something about Gee l-liking-”
“Oh my god, you like them back! I knew it!” She squeals, cutting me off.
“No I uh d-don’t I just erm-”
“Yes you so do Frank don’t even try and lie!”
“Okay maybe I do, but how do you know they do?”
“I think I can tell when someone fancies my son, my mother’s senses are tingling. Besides, who draws someone they’ve known for a matter of days if they don’t have a massive crush on them? Plus, they’ve hardly taken their eyes off you the whole time they’ve been here” she explains. She does have a convincing case but I still find it hard to believe.
“But why me?”
“Because you’re a talented, interesting, handsome young man who doesn’t realise how awesome he is”
“Thanks but you’re my mum of course you’d say that”
“It’s true”
***
The evening went smoothly and we went to bed pretty early. Gee put on some twenty one pilots as we lay in bed. It feels like a sleepover, I mean in a way it is but the previous night we both fell asleep immediately, we’d had a long day but now we lay awake. I can hear the scratching of a pencil on paper and assume Gee’s drawing. I sit and visualise them, knowing full well they most likely look nothing like the image in my head. I imagine a figure sat cross legged, bright red locks of hair hiding their face, leaving only a slight one sided smile and a pointy chin and nose visible. I don’t know why but I feel my heart twist as I remember I will never know if the image is accurate. My lack of sight hasn’t really got to me much recently. I just try to avoid thinking about it, obviously I sometimes miss it but not as much as I used to, that’s why I’m so surprised at the intensity of the emotion I’m feeling now. It’s a mixture of despair and aching for something I will never have, and I haven’t felt this way in ages. Fuck Gee for coming into my life and messing with my emotions. Or maybe just fuck Gee.
Notes
sorry this is kinda bad i have writers block, i know where i should be in a few chapters i just don't know how to get there
thanks for reading!!
plz comment n stuff
Megan x
@snailthesaints (twitter)
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@Gee'sCLUELESSgirl!
tysm for being so understanding omg <3
10/29/15