Can I Be Your Dying Wish

[Frank's P.O.V.]
It had been three days since I had received the news that I had cancer when I decided I would call the guy from the coffee shop, Gerard. I walked to the kitchen counter where I had set his number next to the sugar bowl. I picked it up and unfolded it before I pulled my phone from my back pocket. I typed in his number, hesitating before finally pressing the call button.
The phone rang three times before I heard a voice,"Hello?"
"Hi, uh, you probably don't remember me, I'm Frank, uh, from the coffee shop the other day." I said shyly.
“Yeah, Frank I remember you, I've been hoping you'd call.”
“Uh, yeah, did you still want me to teach you a few chords?" I asked.
"Yeah, yeah. I can't promise that I'm teachable though. I think me learning guitar is a lost cause." He laughed a little.
"I'm sure you're teachable. When are you available for the lesson?" I asked.
"Well, I was thinking that tonight I could take you out for dinner and then you could teach me, if that's okay?" He asked.
"So like a-a date?" I questioned.
"No, like a doctor's appointment." He joked.
“S-so what time?” I asked.
"Five work for you?"
“Sure.”
"Okay, uh, do you want me to pick you up or what?" He asked.
“I-if that's not a problem.”
"Of course it's not. Uh, do you wanna text me your address?"
“Sure."
"Okay. So I'll come pick you up at five?"
“Sounds good.”
"Yeah. Uhm, so, see you later?"
“Yeah, see you later. Goodbye." I smiled before I hung up.
After I hung up I sent him my address so he would know where to pick me up.
He replied quickly,"Rad(: I'll pick you up at five."
I went around my apartment, straightening up my things so it would look presentable for Gerard.
Once I was done straightening up, I sat down to watch TV just to blow some time. It was only two, so I had plenty of time to waste.
I watched TV until it was four.
I got up and turned off the TV before walking down the hall to the bathroom to get in the shower.
I turned the water on and waited for it to get hot. Once it became hot enough, I got in. The minute the hot steam from the shower filled my lungs, another coughing fit began.
After I stopped coughing, I began to wash myself, cleaning my whole body, letting the hot water run down over my skin. I finished quickly and got out, going to my room, finding a clean outfit and getting dressed. I put on a Queen shirt and some black skinny jeans as well as my black converse.
As I pulled my other shoe on my phone began playing the obnoxious sound that was my ringtone, I didn't have a song or anything like that it was just the obnoxious pre set that came with the phone. I picked up the phone and saw that it was Gerard calling.
I answered it,“Hello?”
"Hey, Frank, yeah. Uhm, I'm outside your apartment. I, uh, got here early. I apologize. I usually don't come early," there was a pause and then he spoke again, quicker this time,"oh my god, that sounded really dirty but I didn't mean it like that. I swear. I'm not the type of person who says things like that in public."
I laughed,"It's okay, I know what you meant.”
He laughed a little as well,"Yeah you might not want to let me in yet, I basically look like a red potato."
“I'll be right there.” I laughed as I hung up.
I went and opened the front door, and Gerard was there, leaning against the wall with an awkward grin on his face,"Hi, I'm a red potato, nice to see you. You look lovely."
I laughed a bit,“Well you look great for a red potato, and thank you.”
He laughed at my dumb joke before speaking,"We've gotten off to a great start, haven't we."
“Yeah we have, so where are we gonna go?”
“There's an Italian restaurant down the street, I've heard it's pretty good.”
“Yeah, that sounds good.”
"Rad. So, uh, if you're ready, we can get going."
“Yeah, let's go.”
"Okay." He smiled as I walked out of my apartment and locked the door.
We walked down the stairs until we reached the ground floor. He opened the door to the building and held it open for me to go through first.
I smiled at the gesture,"Thank you."
He smiled back,"You're welcome."
We walked out the door and in the direction of what I assumed was Gerard's car. It was a black car, nothing fancy. I don't know what model it was, I never paid much mind to cars, they were just not my thing.
He walked around to my side along with me and opened the door for me once again. after that, he walked around to the driver's side and got in, buckling his seatbelt. I did the same before he put the car into gear and began to drive.
"I'm sorry, my car is pretty shitty. I do, however, have a bunch of kick ass CDs in the glove box. You can pick one out and put it in the player if you want."
I opened the glove box and about 15 different cds nearly fell out I picked them up, reading them as I held them, finally deciding on a Misfits album.
“Good choice.” He said when the music began.
“Thanks.” I replied.
He just smiled and continued to drive.
“So, what's your favorite band?” I asked, being the first to talk since the music began.
"That's an unfair question." His smile grew bigger.
“Okay, fine, what are your top three favorite bands?”
"Top three? Probably The Smashing Pumpkins, The Misfits, and Iron Maiden. What are your top three?"
“Misfits, Nirvana, and Black Flag.“
"Nice selection."
“Thanks, I like yours too.”
"So, since we're talking about music, what's your musical guilty pleasure?"
"Uh, I like Morrissey and The Smiths. What's yours?" I smiled a bit.
"Oh, I love David Bowie." He smiled. I felt my smile grow bigger.
“Oh really?”
"Yeah, why? Do you not like Bowie?" He asked, slightly worried.
"I like Bowie. I mean I like fame and ground control to major Tom."
"Space oddity."
"What?"
"The song, it's called space oddity not ground control to major Tom." A smile grew on his face as he spoke.
I felt my cheeks flush red and I let out a quiet,"Oh."
He let out a small giggle,"My mom used to call it ground control to major Tom and she absolutely loves David Bowie."
"Is she the reason you like him?"
"She's the reason I even heard him. She listened to him all the time." He smiled as he spoke.
"Oh, wow, we're here already. That was fast." I said as we pulled up in front of the restaurant.
He pulled into a parking spot, turned off the car and got out before running around to my side and opening the door for me.
I had barely even gotten my seatbelt off, how did he move that fast?
"Your door, princess." He smiled and held his hand out for me to take.
I felt my cheeks heat up as I took his hand. He helped me out of the car.
My face remained red as I spoke,"I'm not a princess."
"Whatever you say, princess." He smiled and shut the door behind me before we both began to walk towards the restaurant.
Once we got to the door, he reached out his hand and opened it, smiling at me,"After you, princess."
I rolled my eyes as the blush took over my face once again,“So is there a reason you keep calling me princess, or do you just like embarrassing me?”
"Honestly, I think it's cute when you blush." He smirked.
His comment only made the blush turn a deeper shade of red as I passed him and walked into the restaurant.
I simply muttered,"Shut up, it's not cute."
"Oh, but it is, and you know what else is cute?"
"What?"
"That you haven't let go of my hand."
I blushed and quickly let go of his hand, completely embarrassed.
We were quickly seated before we ordered. Then they brought our food and we ate quickly before paying the bill and leaving. We got into the car before driving back to my place. He, of course, opened every door for me, calling me princess every time as well.
We arrived back at my apartment and I unlocked the door entering the stairwell. We got caught up in a conversation about comics. I didn't even think about pacing myself as I began up the stairs, and about halfway up, talking and climbing stairs proved to be too much and I felt winded. I stopped suddenly and succomed to a coughing fit, each cough preventing me from get any oxygen. I sat down to try and remedy the coughs to no avail.
I looked up at Gerard and he had a completely surprised look on his face.
"Oh my God! Are you okay? Well obviously not." He crouched down.
“I'm fine." I forced out between the painful coughs.
"No, you're not fine, but don't try to talk, it looks painful."
I gasped a few times before speaking in a barely audible tone,"I'm fine.”
The coughing subsided and I gasped some more trying to make up for the lost oxygen.
"A-are you okay?" He asked, worried, looking into my eyes.
“Yes, I'm fine.”
He reached his hand out to help me up and I took it, standing back up.
We finally reached my apartment and I unlocked the door before leading Gerard in.
"Wow, for a single guy who lives alone, your place is pretty organized."
"Yeah, I clean a lot. I can't function in a messy place.”
"You should come over to my apartment and clean it for me."
“You're a messy person?” I laughed.
"Not messy, just not this clean or organized."
“Well I'll admit, it's not exactly normal to be this organized.”
"Normal is shit, if you ask me," He smiled,"I like weird and clean is a good kind of weird."
"I'm not one of those people who like wiped a seat down before I sit in it or anything. I just like order."
"I get that, but sometimes you need a little chaos."
“Chaos only works with some people.”
"I don't mean like chaos all the time, no, that's anarchy. You need order. I mean chaos like a rainstorm."
“Thank you professor, I got that.”
He just rolled his eyes and smiled,"You're lucky I'm not easily offended."
“I thought I was supposed to be teaching you guitar, not you teaching me how to live my life.” I joked.
"Well I can't let you teach me and not repay you in some way." He smiled and I could've sworn I saw him wink.
“So shall we get started with the lesson?”
"I dunno I was kind of enjoying just talking to you." He blushed a bit as he smiled.
"You can talk to me later." I smiled back, blushing a bit as well.
"Okay, let's get on with the lesson. But promise me that no matter how bad I am, you won't laugh at me."
"Yeah, I promise."
I went and got my guitar off the stand and sat on the couch. I showed him the basic chords a, d, e, g, and c, and explained them as I went before handing the guitar to him to try.
He held the guitar properly as he spoke,"Okay, so you hold the guitar on your lap like this. That's where you lost me."
I giggled a bit.
“You put your nondominant hand on the neck, and your other hand on the other end of the strings.”
He did as I had instructed,"Yeah, I got that."
“Now, strum an a chord.”
"Oh, an a chord?" He said sarcastically, pretending like he knew exactly what I was talking about when in reality he had no clue.
“Come on, I just showed you.” I laughed.
"Just because you show me doesn't mean I comprehend what I've been shown. It doesn't mean I understand or even remember it."
I reached over and put his fingers on the right note,"There, thats an a chord. Now, hold down the strings and strum.”
He did as I told him, holding down the strings and strumming.
“There, see? It's easy.”
"Oh, yeah, simple." He remarked sarcastically.
“Now try a d chord, do you remember that one?”
"Why would I remember a d chord and not remember the a chord?"
I just laughed, before again showing him the proper way to produce the note.
"You promised you wouldn't laugh."
“You didn't say this would be funny.”
"But you promised." He pouted.
"I'm sort but it was funny."
"Fuck this, I quit."
"No, don't just give up. I didn't mean to laugh. I'm sorry."
“I still give up. I'm a singer, not a guitarist." He handed the guitar back to me.
I smirked,"You know, I don't believe you. Prove it, singer, sing something."
He blushed,"What am I even supposed to sing?"
"I don't know, you're the singer. Sing whatever you want." I shrugged.
"Like what?" He asked.
“I'll play a song on guitar, and you sing it.”
"O-okay."
“Pick a song.”
"I dunno. How about ground control to major Tom?" He teased.
"Very funny, asshole."
"I had to say it." He laughed.
“So really, what song?”
"Do you know how to play Nirvana?"
“Yeah, what song?"
"Come As You Are."
I began playing the familiar intro to Come As You Are.
He joined in with the music and sang.
Fuck. He was good. Really good.
I stopped playing after the second verse, and he stopped singing.
“Wow, you're great.”
"I'm not that great." He blushed and looked down.
“Yes you are.”
"No." He blushed and scratched at the back of his neck.
“You're really good though.”
"You're really good at playing guitar." He changed the subject.
“Thanks, I've played since I was nine.”
"Holy shit, nine?"
“Yeah, my family is a bunch of music freaks.”
"That's so neat. So you've been surrounded by music your whole life?"
“As long as I can remember."
"That's really cool. Do you know how to play any other instruments?"
“I can play a little piano, but it's not really my thing.”
"That's awesome. I bet you're great."
“Not really. I do play a mean twinkle twinkle little star.”
He laughed, showing off his smile,"I'm sure it kicks ass."
I simply smiled and we fell into an awkward silence.
"So, can I ask you something?" He asked, breaking the silence.
"Yeah, sure."
"It's about before, coming up the stairs..." He trailed off towards the end.
“What about it?” I asked.
"You, uh, y-you, uhm, started coughing, like violently. I know it sounds stupid, but I, uh, I'm worried about you."
“Yeah, sorry.”
"I, uhm, why did you cough?"
“Don't worry, I'm fine and I'm not contagious, or anything, so you don't have to worry about that."
"You don't sound fine," he paused and looked down before looking up at me,"you don't have to tell me but just know that I'm here for you. I mean we're friends, right?"
The word "friends" caught my ear, more than any word, it seemed kind of foreign,“I-uhm, y-yeah, we are.”
He smiled nervously and looked down before stating,"You don't sound too sure."
“It's just, I haven't had friends in such a long time, hell, I haven't had family in a long time. It's just kind of foreign to me.”
“Why not? Is there any reason?”
“Well, my family kind of disowned me, and I don't really know why I don't have friends. I mean I don't leave my apartment all too much.”
"No wonder. If you never get out, you can't meet people."
“Well yeah, I guess I don't put an effort into meeting people.”
"If you tried, you'd have a bunch of friends. You're likeable."
“That's what you think.”
"What do you mean?"
“I don't know, I've just always been told how fucked up I am. I guess I just kind of believe it."
"I don't think you're fucked up. Who told you that you were?" He asked, looking concerned.
I sighed,"My parents. They're massive homophobes, they disowned me when I came out and I haven't spoken to them in four years.”
A sad look took over his face and he let out a soft,"Oh."
I looked to the floor,“Yeah.”
"Being gay doesn't make you fucked up and they don't deserve a good son like you."
“I know, but it still hurts.”
"Yeah, I get that."
I didn't reply, just sighed.
He bit his lip before speaking,"I haven't told my family yet. My brother knows, but my mom and dad don't."
“Why haven't you told them?"
He replied in a quiet voice,"I'm scared."
“A-are they accepting?”
"My mom always told me she'll love me no matter what, but really, what parent would tell their kid 'I love you no matter what, unless you're gay and then fuck off' I mean they wouldn't tell you that."
“Well yeah, but do you know their views on gay people?”
"I don't know, and I'm not sure I want to find out."
“Oh.”
"Yeah. I just know their plan for me was to grow up, get a job, get a girlfriend, get married, and have kids. I'm not anywhere close to being what they wanted."
“If it's any consolation, I think you're really cool.”
He smiled and started laughing,"Thanks, Frankie, you're really cool too."
The new name caught me,“Frankie?”
He blushed before going back to, what I assumed was, his usual, smartass self,"That's your name, isn't it?
“Well I was under the impression that my name is Frank, I don't know, I might be wrong.”
"Frank is too frank."
I laughed,“Well if that's what floats your boat, I'll be Frankie.”
"It's what sails the ship."
“Whatever you say, Gee?”
"Gee?" He raised an eyebrow.
“What do you think I'm the only one who gets a nickname?”
"Well it was supposed to be special, just for you."
“Special?”
"Yes, like one of a kind, unique, individual."
"It can still be special but now it's for the both of us."
"Whatever floats your boat." He smiled.
I laughed, but apparently my body didn't find it funny. I went into yet another coughing fit, this one more painful than the previous ones.
I sat back, still coughing. I lost track of how long it took. Soon, the room went blurry and then black.
The next thing I knew, I heard Gerard's voice,"Don't even tell me that you're fine."
My vision focused and I looked at Gerard before speaking,“Don't worry about me.”
"Frankie, you sound like you're coughing up a lung. I'm going to worry about you."
“I'm fine.”
He sighed,"Frankie."
“It's fine.”
He frowned and looked down.
Immediately I felt guilty for the sad look he now had,“I'm sorry."
"Don't apologize. I just wish you'd let me in."
“It's just, a lot right now.”
"I understand. I'm sorry for pushing, it was wrong of me."
“No, it's okay. I appreciate it. I just dont want to burden you."
He gave me a small smile as he spoke softly,"You're worth the burden, though."
I sighed and rested my head in my hands.
"I'm sorry," he paused before continuing,"uh, m-maybe I should go?"
“Y-yeah, not to be rude, but it is getting late.”
He stood up as he spoke,"Yeah, I'll, uhm, I'll talk to you later. Thanks for the lesson. I can let myself out."
“B-bye.”
He walked to the door and let himself out.

Notes

hope you guys enjoy thiss xo-ashlee