The next morning Gerard woke up refreshed and feeling a lot better than he had in a very long time. While he understood on a deeper level that the fact he hadn’t drank last night had a lot to do with it, he chose to focus on the belief this trip was the reason.

Since he had enjoyed his dinner last night at the restaurant in the parking lot he decided he’d go there for breakfast.

“Morning.” The same waitress that had served his dinner greeted him when he walked in.

“Wow don’t you ever go home?” He teased as he slid into the vinyl booth.

The pretty young girl giggled “Don’t seem like it. I hate when I pull the dinner shift one night then the early one the next day but hey, I need the work so I can’t complain.” She handed him the menu. “Want coffee?”

“Yes please.” He answered looking down trying to decide what sounded good this morning.

When she returned to the table and set the cup down he looked up. “Uh, what do you suggest?”

“Depends on how hungry you are.”

“Pretty hungry.” He planned on driving hours before stopping for lunch. “Got a lot of driving to do today so I need to fuel up.”

“Oh are you on vacation?”

Her simple question made him pause. “Well yeah, I am.” He was on a vacation from his life.

“Cool, where you headed?”

He grinned, it was nice to chat with a young girl who didn’t recognize him. “Got no idea.” He admitted, “Just decided to hit the open road. Think I might head into Colorado.” As soon as the words left his mouth he wondered why he once again came up with that thought.

“Must be nice.” She said answered becoming serious. “I’d love to do that. Maybe someday…” Just then another customer walked in. “Uh, ready to order or do you need more time?”

He realized she was the only waitress at the moment. “Go ahead” He nodded to the new arrival. “I’m still not sure.”

As she wandered off he glanced down at the menu again and by the time she returned he’d decided. “I’ll have the two eggs, over easy, hash browns and a side of bacon.”

“Okay” She nodded while scribbling down the order.

Once she was gone Gerard took a sip of coffee then leaned back in the booth. A strange sense of peacefulness settled over him as he let his gaze travel out the glass window to the sunshine filled parking lot. Another good day was in store, he told himself. Yes, just another day of doing nothing in particular.

_____________________________________________________________________


Mikey was going down the list of contact info on Gerard’s phone. Since early this morning he’d already called fifteen of Gerard’s friends. Not wanting to alarm anyone he’d simply said he was trying to get a hold of Gerard and wondered when the last time they’d spoken to him was. Most seemed to accept the question without much thought but that was only because they didn’t understand that Gerard had never before gone this long without contacting Mikey.

“Honey, lets do something today.” Alicia said as she sat down then snuggled up next to her husband.

Mikey realized she was being patient with him over the Gerard situation. “Hey, I don’t mean to ignore you…”

She cut him off, “I know that and I understand. But sitting here isn’t going to help. If Gee calls he’ll call your cell so there’s no reason we have to stay home.”

He nodded, “You’re right. So what do you want to do today?”

Before she could answer Mikey’s cell rang.

“It’s Lindsey.” He quickly connected.

She got right to the point, “I understand you’re trying to get a hold of me?”

“Hey Lindsey.” Mikey wanted to keep this conversation friendly. “Yeah, I’ve been trying to call you.”

“What about?” Her tone was steely.

“About Gerard.” Mikey said then quickly launched into his explanation, “Uh, I can’t get a hold of him.”

“I’ve heard.”

“Oh, from who?”

“Joe Ryan called Karli.” She offered not other explanation.

Alicia, who was sitting close by listening, frowned.

“Well then you know Gerard seems to have disappeared but the weird thing is he left his phone behind.”

“Karli told me that’s what Joe said. So I’m assuming since Joe knows this then he also must know what’s going on between me and Gerard. I’m guessing he talked to him.”

“Yeah, the day you left for New York.”

“Probably called to share with him what’s going on.” Lindsey said sarcastically. “How nice he and Gerard have even more in common now they can discuss.”

“What?” Mikey was confused.

Lindsey snorted. “Don’t matter. Mikey, I’m sorry but I have no idea where Gerard went. I’m sure he’ll show up sooner or later.”

It broke Mikey’s heart to hear her talk this way. “Look I know you two have some problems.”

“That is an understatement.”

“Ok, yeah, sorry. But I didn’t know, Gee never told me there were problems so all of this is a shock to me.”

“Including him screwing Karli?”

Mikey wasn’t sure how to respond.

Suddenly Lindsey’s tone changed, “Mikey, I’m sorry. I don’t mean to take this out on you. But yeah Gee and I have had problems for a long time. I’m sure you can’t understand why I’m still employing Karli after what happened but the truth is I kinda expected it. If it hadn’t been her it would have been someone else. Gee and I haven’t had a real marriage for almost a year. Karli just happened to be there and was convenient. She probably wasn’t the first. I’m guessing he hooked up a time or two on tour with someone.”

Mikey started shaking his head, “No, he didn’t.”

“Well if he didn’t it was probably because he was afraid you’d find out.”

“Gee loves you.” Mikey started to say.

Lindsey cut him off, “He did once and I loved him but that’s over. Both of us have known it for a long time. The more I have time to think about it, well the truth is I’m not pissed at either one of them. I just want to move on with my life.”

“I’m sorry.” Mikey muttered.

“Me too.” She said softly. “But I honestly hope Gee is okay. I’ll give you a call if I hear from him.”

“Thanks Lindsey.” Mikey said sadly before disconnecting.

“Wow.” Alicia sighed leaning back. She thought a minute. “Uh, what do you suppose she meant about Gee and Joe having something else in common?”

Mikey tried to replay the conversation in his head. “That was weird. I’m not sure.”

Alicia too was trying to remember the conversation. “She was talking about Gee and Karli…” Her eyes grew wide, “Holy shit, I bet Joe has been with her too.”

Mikey stood abruptly, “Come on, lets get out of here. I’m tired of thinking about this shit, tired of thinking about the mess Gerard has made of his life.”

That night as Gerard settled into yet another small motel room he was feeling very good. The day had passed with him stopping at various out of the way spots, like small bookstores and flea markets. Before this was something he’d thought he’d like to do but there had never been time. Now he had that time, he had all the time he needed.

However an hour later as he tried to get interested in a television show he was growing restless, the walls seemed to be closing in on him. As much as he didn’t want to admit what was going on, he had a pretty good idea. He was in Colorado, the state where he’d gotten married. And while he wasn’t in Denver, he was in Boulder, he couldn’t stop thinking about that night years ago when he and Lindsey had decided to marry. “Shit,” He muttered angry at himself. “Don’t ruin a good day.” He started to pace but then another unwanted thought popped into his mind, he’d seen a bar just down the street.

Flipping off the TV he grabbed his wallet having decided he would pop in and have a few drinks. There was nothing wrong with that, was there? It wasn’t like he was going to get plowed.

The cool night air smelled so clean that Gerard took several deep breaths as he began to walk towards the bar. He was desperately trying to get back the calm feeling he’d had all day. However the closer he got to the bar the more nervous he felt. Just one drink, he told himself as he pulled open the door… just one.

The inside of the building was dark and loud. The jukebox was blaring a country song that Gerard recognized from a commercial. He moved towards the bar, his eyes automatically inventorying the liquor bottles on the glass shelves.

When the bartender walked over Gerard asked for one of the high end whiskeys. His first swallow went down rough causing him to cough. Beside him he saw the woman on the next bar stool lean over to be heard.

“You’d think at that price it wouldn’t burn going down, wouldn’t you?”

He swiveled to get a better look at her. The darkened room made it a bit difficult to see but she looked to be in her twenties, with long dark hair and a seductive smile. “Uh, yeah.” He nodded then immediately took another sip.

She laughed, “That’s what I like, a man who doesn’t give up.”

Gerard grinned, “Hey, couldn’t do that after one sip now could I?”

Moving closer she touched his arm. “I’m Kelly. Haven’t see you around here before, have I?”

He searched her eyes and was relieved to see she obviously didn’t recognize him. He took another drink then smiled, it made him feel good that an attractive woman was flirting with him, a woman who didn’t recognize him as a performer. “My name’s Joe. I’m just passing through.” He finally answered as he motioned to the bartender. He noticed her glass was empty. Speaking to the bartender he ordered another drink then another for the lady. He grinned when she gave his arm a light squeeze as thanks.

She moved closer to him pretending it was to be heard over the music, “So where ya from?”

“California.” He answered before taking another drink. “I’m just taking a break, had to get away from everything you know?”

She nodded, “So how’d you end up in Boulder?”

The question was one he realized he really couldn’t answer. “Just traveling with no plan.” He admitted. “Guess the road just led me here.”

“Well I’m glad it did.” She smiled. “Very glad.”

The voice in the back of his mind was reminding what had already happened once on this trip and how he’d promised himself he wouldn’t go down that path again. However, sitting at the bar with this beautiful woman, drinking fine whisky seemed to make that promise disappear.

They talked over drinks for about twenty minutes. Gerard found himself enjoying this chance to be ‘Joe’ and as the lies about himself rolled off his tongue his brain was starting to numb.

“Would you like to dance?” She asked when the conversation slowed hoping to keep his attention.

Gerard shook his head, “Not much of a dancer, sorry.”

She sighed dramatically. “I’m not that good either but it seemed like a good idea to ask you.”

As she’d hoped Gerard gave her a confused look. “What?”

“Well…” She battered her long lashes, “It was an excuse to get closer to you. It’s so hard to hear over the music.”

His eyes flashed with desire. “Yeah, I agree. It’s pretty fuckin’ loud.”

Kelly ran her hand down his arm. “You know my apartment is just down the street. We could go there, it’s much more quiet…” She leaned in, “And much more private.”

The music was definitely starting to bother him.

She added for good measure, “And I do have a bottle of what you’re drinking.”

“Yeah, sounds like a plan.” He pulled out his wallet to pay for the drinks not noticing her eyes grew wide when she spotted the amount of cash he was carrying.

“I’ll be right back.” She nodded towards the back of the bar where the restrooms were located, “You won’t leave without me, will you?”

His eyes took in the view of her short skirt and long legs as she slid off the barstool, “I’ll wait right here.” He picked up his glass and polished off the rest of his drink.

Just then the song ended and thankfully another didn’t start right away. He was itching to order one more drink but decided to wait.

“Amigo, it would be best not to wait.”

It took Gerard a moment to realize the man on the next barstool was talking to him. He hadn’t realized anyone had taken the spot. Turning he saw a young man dressed in jeans and a denim shirt. A cowboy hat pulled low hid his eyes.

“What?”

The man grinned, “Just offering a piece of advice. Totally up to you if you take it or not.”

Gerard frowned as a thought came to him, “Uh, she with you?”

The man laughed, “Nope. She’s uh, not my type.”

“So then why shouldn’t I wait for her?” Gerard asked crossing his arms in an angry gesture.

“Totally up to you, amigo.” The stranger’s voice was low and smooth. “But I’d lay odds with you that right now she’s out back calling her boyfriend. They have quite a racket going.” When Gerard gave him a confused look he added, “That wad of money you’re carrying really caught her attention.”

Suddenly Gerard realized he was carrying a lot of cash, not a smart move. He wasn’t sure if Kelly had noticed but this man obviously had. A prickle of fear traveled down his spine. “Ain’t that much.” He lied, “Mostly ones.”

The man snorted, “Yeah, okay. Just thought I’d pass along that information to you. Would be a shame for your trip to get derailed.”

Now Gerard was really concerned, he was sure the man hadn’t been at the bar when he’d sat down. Just how long had he been listening in to his conversation? Deciding it wasn’t worth possibly getting robed he slid off his bar stool.

“Good choice.” The man said softly. “Keep making those and you’ll find the answers you are lookin’ for.”

“What?” Gerard was sure he hadn’t heard him correctly.

The man just smiled, “Have a nice night, Gerard.”

“You know who I am?” He asked as the room gently swayed.

The man also slipped off his stool but didn’t respond.

Nervously Gerard reached into his pocket knowing he had a smaller amount of money to leave a tip for the bartender. Suddenly curiosity got the better of him. “So what’s your name?”

The man looked surprised a moment then answered, “Names Rafe Marteniz.”

The name wasn’t one Gerard recognized. He laid the tip money on the bar then turned back around. The man was gone.

“What the fuck?” Gerard muttered in shock. He glanced around the bar but didn’t see him. How could he have left so quickly? Deciding he’d had enough he made a bee line for the door.

A few minutes later Kelly returned.

“Hey Tom? Where did the guy I was talking to go?”

The bartender walked over to her. “Took off.”

“He was suppose to wait for me.” She fumed.

Tom laughed, “Suppose you were taking him home?”

She glared at him.

“I’d consider myself lucky if I was you.” Tom said speaking up because another somebody done somebody wrong song had just started.

“Why?” She asked crossing her arms in anger.

“The dude was fuckin crazy.” He answered leaning forward so she could hear. “Soon as you took off he started talking to himself.”

“What?”

He nodded, “Yeah, I’m not shitting you. Kept looking over at the empty barstool next to him. Had quite a conversation with it.”

“Well shit.” She got back up on the stool then leaned on the counter. “You serious?”

“Yeah, I’m serious. You’re fuckin’ lucky you didn’t take that one home. Might have had a lot of money with him but who knows what else he had?”

Kelly thought about it a minute then shrugged. Oh well, she thought, as her eyes traveled around the bar. She’d just have to find someone else.

Outside in the cool night air Gerard took several deep breaths trying to clear his mind. He glanced nervously around looking for the man from the bar. An icy finger of fear traveled down his spine. What if he’d just fell into the guy’s plan…getting him outside the bar to rob him? He quickened his steps wanting to get back to the safety of his motel room.

When at last he was back inside his room with the door locked he took a deep sigh of relief. Now however he was angry. Why had he listened to the stranger? If he hadn’t right now he’d be enjoying Kelly’s company and her whisky.

Throwing down his room key on the dresser he caught a glimpse of himself in the mirror.

“You stupid fuck” He said to his reflection. The truth was he really didn’t know if he was mad at himself for leaving the bar with Kelly or not. Too much alcohol was coursing through his body to decide.

Undressing quickly he then flipped off the lights and fell into bed. Well it didn’t matter now he decided as sleep hit him hard.

________________________________________________________________________


When Gerard awoke the next morning his thoughts immediately returned to last night. Now that the incident was in the past he decided it was a good thing he hadn’t gone with the woman to her place. Since his mind was clear he easily remembered his resolve to drink less and to stay away from women. And while the plan made sense to him now he knew deep down inside that when nightfall came, when the loneliness came, he’d have to struggle to remember that plan.

Not wanting to fall into depression he got out of bed, took a shower then dressed. He was in a good frame of mind and looking forward to a new day. But as he was slipping on his shoes he paused. Something about the man from the bar last night was bothering him. Had he been telling Gerard the truth about Kelly? Had her plan really been to rob him? But it was more than that, something about the man….

“Rafe Martinez” Gerard said softly to himself. He tried to recall what he’d looked like but the memory was fuzzy. Maybe it had been his voice? For the first time since beginning this trip he missed his laptop or at least this phone that would have given him Internet access.

“Shit.” He muttered standing up. What would he do if he had Internet access? Google the guys name? “Yeah, like that would work” he laughed as he began to shove yesterday’s clothes in his duffle. “Pretty sure there are a lot of guys with that name.”

Suddenly his eyes fell on the yellow piece of paper located at the bottom of the bag. Without understanding why he pulled it out, grabbed a pen then wrote the name down. For a minute he stared at the notes on the paper, a strange feeling coming over him.

“I’m fuckin’ losing my mind.” He laughed as he shoved the paper back in his bag while trying to play off the whole thing. He was to the door when he suddenly stopped hearing the man’s voice in his head. The guy had mentioned Gerard’s trip and while he had just assumed he’d overheard the conversation with Kelly now Gerard wasn’t so sure he’d even mentioned it to her. All he could recall was saying he’d needed to get away. He couldn’t remember saying he was looking for answers.

“But I really am.” He whispered.

_______________________________________________________________________


Joe had been dreading this phone call since he’d called Karli.

“Hey Mikey. Heard from Gee?” He asked as soon as he connected the call.

Mikey sighed, “Not a word but Lindsey called me.”

Joe picked up his cup of coffee to take a sip. “Oh? Has she heard from him?”

“No but she did mention you called Karli.”

“Well yeah. I figured it was a good way to find out if they’d heard from Gee.” He explained.

Mikey sighed, “Look, I’m just gonna come right out with it. Lindsey made it sound like you and Karli have some kind of relationship.”

Joe took another sip of his strong brew before answering. “Not really. I hooked up with her once and that was it. I told Gee because I wanted him to be aware.”

“Why?”

“Because I don’t like her. I think she’s been trying to get with him for quite sometime.”

Alicia, who was listening, nodded.

“And you told Gee that?” Mikey asked.

“Yeah, I thought he should know.” When Mikey remained silent he added, “I get that Lindsey is saying she’s okay with what happened, that she don’t care, but…”

Mikey spoke up. “You think this could play a part in the divorce with that’s what happens?”

“It could.” Joe said sadly. “Shit, I don’t know what to think really but I wanted Gee to know.”

“Yeah, I get it.” They talked a few minutes more then disconnected.

“See, I told you.” Alicia said shaking her head. “Fuck, I wish Lindsey had never hired that woman.”

Mikey glanced out at the bright California sunlight through the kitchen window. “Not sure it makes any difference. Gee’s marriage seemed doomed anyway.”

“Yeah well him hooking up with Karli sure as shit didn’t help any.”

Mikey didn’t answer; his mind was on his brother. Where are you, Gee, he wondered, and what are you doing?

______________________________________________________________________


Wanting to put Colorado and its memories behind him Gerard skipped breakfast. Once he filled the car he hit the open road. He didn’t stop for lunch until almost two in the afternoon. He’d crossed into Kansas and now his stomach was rumbling with hunger. As before he’d stayed off the Interstate instead choosing smaller highways. The small restaurant he spotted was just outside Great Bend.

Walking into the restaurant he was immediately greeted by an older waitress. “Just grab a seat anywhere.”

He chose a booth by the windows.

“Here ya go.” She handed him a menu. “What would you like to drink?”

“Uh, a Coke I guess.” He answered looking down at his food choices.

When she returned a few minutes later he gave her his order. She scribbled it down then spoke. “You from out East?”

The question surprised him. “Uh, actually I live in California now but yeah originally I’m from New Jersey.”

She smiled, “Yeah, thought so. Picked up on the accent right away.”

“Oh.” He smiled, “Didn’t realize it was that noticeable.”

“We don’t get a whole lot of travels through here.” She explained. “You visiting someone in town?”

He shook his head, “Nope just out seeing the country.”

She laughed, “Well, if you crossed Western Kansas you didn’t see much but wide open spaces.”

Gerard smiled, “Yeah, that’s true” So far today the trip had been uneventful.

“But I’m sure you’ve been watching the storms building.”

“Storms?” He had been so lost in thought most of the day he’d barely noticed the weather.

She nodded, “Got a wicked line of storms headed this way.”

He glanced outside but the sun was still shining.

“I’ll go put your order in.” She walked away leaving Gerard to once again stare out at the sky.

After he’d finished his lunch he made his way to the cash register. His waitress rang up the bill.

“You planning on driving much further today?” She asked as she handed him his change.

“Not sure.” He answered just as thunder rumbled in the distance.

“Well be careful out there.” She said “Already got tornado warnings issued for the next county over and the storms are headed this way.”

“Tornado warnings?”

She nodded, “Yeah, like I said it’s a wicked line of storms.”

As he prepared to pull out of the parking lot Gerard switched on the radio looking for a weather report. The last thing he needed was to be caught in a storm. However as he listened to the automated voice on the radio listing the counties in the path of the storm he frowned. He had no idea what county he was in so it offered little help.

Two hours later he was still driving but was growing nervous. The sky had turned dark, full of angry looking clouds but as of yet there was still no rain. He pulled off to the side of the road to look at the map he’d purchased at the last gas station. It had been a long time since he’d actually used a map because he usually just depended on his GPS. Unfortunately this car wasn’t equipped with that technology and he didn’t have his cell phone.

“This is insane.” He muttered trying to locate his position on the map. Suddenly he realized that just driving without really knowing where you were wasn’t the best idea. He knew he was on Highway 54 but not having seen a road marker he didn’t know exactly where he was located. “Shit.”

The sky was now even darker than before. Tossing the map down he decided to keep driving until he saw a sign for a city. He’d stop for the day when he could because this weather was making him nervous. “I’ve watched too many episodes of Storm Chasers” He laughed as he put the car into drive then eased back on the road.

The first fat rain drops hit the car a few minutes later. Now he was in a race to find a place to stop. The last thing he needed was hail damage to his car and this storm seemed to be promising that would happen.

Up ahead he spotted a road sign. Hoping it wasn’t for some small town with no lodging he started to slow down.

“Oh shit.” He blinked then did a double take as he pulled off the road. He flipped on the wipers as he stared at the sign. A loud crash of thunder made him jump in his seat. Knowing he needed to find shelter he glanced at the sign once more then pulled back on the road hoping the town he was headed for would offer that shelter. However the name of the town was echoing in his brain. Neosho Falls.

“Got to be a fuckin’ coincidence” he laughed nervously but the words on the paper in his duffle seemed to be haunting him. He’s written Neosho and caidas. He knew caidas translated to falls however until this moment he hadn’t put the two words together. “Neosho Falls is a place.” He muttered straining to see the small road as the rain began to fall in torrents.

The first piece of hail that hit the hood of the car made him curse. “Shit.” He needed to find shelter not just for himself but for the car. However a moment later when he reached the town his sprits plummeted. “It’s a fuckin’ ghost town.”

He slowed the car while looking out at the dilapidated shells of buildings. The only sign that life still existed here was a small bar that looked like it might still do business. “Now what?” he asked himself as more hail, larger chunks, hit the roof of the car. His first thought was to try to seek refuge in the bar. He could have a drink while riding the storm out but with only one car parked out front he wasn’t even sure if the place was open.

A bright flash of lightening, followed by a huge clap of thunder made him jump in his seat again. Fear made him turn up a gravel road without understanding why. Just then he spotted a small farm house. He slowed, pulled in the driveway preparing to turn around. He needed to get out of here because as he looked closer the house seemed deserted. As he put the car into reverse he spotted a form rush out the front door. It was a woman and she was frantically waving him up the driveway.

He put the car in drive and moved towards her. She had his car door open almost as soon as the car was in park.

Gerard was about to open his mouth when a roaring sound filled the air. His first thought was a train track must be nearby but a moment later overwhelming fear filled his heart.

The woman grabbed his arm pulling him across the yard. Again he tried to speak but suddenly the hair on the back of his neck stood as the roaring sound grew louder. He stopped dead in his tracks as he turned his head and saw the funnel cloud in the field across the road.

“Move.” The woman’s voice could barely be heard over the roar. She pulled on his arm. “Now.”

Reaching the storm cellar doors it took all her strength to fight them open from the wind. She practically pushed Gerard down the steps into the darkness.

“Help me.” She yelled trying to close the doors. The funnel had crossed the road and was headed down the driveway.

Her plea snapped him into action. It took both of them to pull the doors shut as the roar of the approaching tornado became deafening.