Lucy slowly moved to release his hands then without a word went into the bathroom.

Gerard sat up slowly confused as to why her mood had suddenly changed. He’d been watching her face when he’d said they had all night in this room and she’d definitely had been upset. Then it came to him, she didn’t want to sleep in the same room with him. He was slowly beginning to understand her and while she definitely wanted to have sex with him he was sure in her mind sleeping together was too intimate. To her way of thinking that would change the dynamics of their relationship.

In the bathroom Lucy was still trying to catch her breath. She avoided looking at herself in mirror afraid of what she’d see.

When she came back out Gerard spoke. “So you want to head back to the farm now?”

Lucy heard what she believed was hurt in his voice. “If you want to”

“That’s not what I asked.” He said softly, “I asked what you want to do.”

She stood looking at him feeling torn. “We don’t need to head back yet. It’s just…” She struggled to find an excuse, “Rex would freak if I didn’t come back. I never spend the night away from home.”

He pretended to take her answer at face value. “Yeah, I understand that.” He glanced over at the screen. “Uh, so let’s finish watching the movie together.”

Heaven help her, her body immediately responded to his suggestion. Slowly she walked towards the bed. When she was close enough he grabbed her hand then quickly positioned her body in front of his. Now he was sitting up, leaning against the headboard with Lucy in between his legs. He urged her to lean back against him.

“This is nice.” He whispered into her ear.

Her body was still tense.

“Relax.” His words were punctuated by a quick nibble to her ear lobe.

She placed her hands on his bare legs then sighed, “I don’t think you’re trying to make me relax.” Her body trembled when his tongue darted out to lick the skin just below her ear.

“Sure, I am.” His laugh tickled her skin. “Just lean back and watch the movie.”

As her eyes went to the antics of the couple on the screen her body definitely wasn’t relaxing especially when she felt his arms circle her waist. As his hands slid between her thighs it was all she could do not to moan.

“You know” He whispered in her ear as his fingers felt the slit in her panties. “As much as I like the crotchless panties I think it’s time to take them off.”

“It is?” Her voice was breathless.

“Yeah, lose them.”

Lucy pushed them down her legs then tossed them onto the floor.

“Much better” Gerard said licking the soft skin of her shoulder while his fingers caressed the curls hiding her heat. “Put your legs over mine.”

As soon as she did he spread their legs giving his fingers better access. “Nice.”

Lucy was trying so hard to ignore what he was doing but it was impossible. When she felt him lean over and grab the vibrator she tried to sit up.

“Oh no you don’t.” He said pulling her back against him. “You’re not going anywhere. You’re gonna sit there and watch the movie.”

The soft humming of the vibrator made the humming in her body quicken.

“Lean back.” He said as he moved the vibrator down her thigh.

There was no way she could deny his request.

On the screen the couple was doing things Lucy had never seen before.

Gerard’s voice was low and sexy. “While I need a little time to recuperate you don’t, do you, Lucy?”

“What?”

“You’re gonna come for me, soon.”

“Oh” she cried out as he placed the vibrator against her swollen nub. It felt so damn good.

Using his other hand his fingers gently pried apart her lips so the vibrator had better access. He could feel the building tension in her body.

“That’s it.” He urged her on. “Come for me.”

Lucy closed her eyes when he placed the vibrator on her clitoris then using his fingers closed her lips around it. When he switched the devise on high she pushed back against him.

“Oh that feels…”

“Tell me.” He demanded roughly, “Tell me how it feels.”

“So good” She panted.

“You’re not watching the movie.”

It was then she realized he could see her thought the mirror over the dresser. As she caught sight of herself, her spread legs, the vibrator teasing, she could feel the orgasm starting. When he suddenly moved the vibrator she cried out.

Gerard laugh, “Not yet, sweetheart.”

“Damn” She panted.

“Hey, you teased me.” He reminded her. “Now it’s my turn.”

“But I was so close.”

“Yeah, I know.” He nibbled on her shoulder. “Let’s do that again.” Once more the vibrator was placed against her throbbing nub. “That’s a girl.” He urged as she leaned back against him. “Let it build.”

And building it was. The feeling was intense, so very intense. This time when he knew she was close he pressed the vibrator harder then slipped one finger inside her. Lucy exploded, her hot juices covering his fingertips.

“Oh damn” She cried out as wave after wave of pleasure washed over her body.

Gerard whispered in her ear. “So I guess you’re enjoying the movie?”

“You could say that.” She panted trying to catch her breath.

They didn’t move until the movie was over.

“So what did you think of the movie?” He asked keeping his arms around her, fearful she’d once again take off.

Lucy was trying to make her brain work. “Uh, not much of a plot.”

He laughed, “Don’t think they really needed one, do you?”

“Suppose not.”

“Hey, it’s still pretty early.” He said not wanting this time together to end. “Why don’t you take a short nap? I’ll watch the news, get caught up in what’s happening in the world.”

In truth she was feeling exhausted. She scooted from between his legs. “I did get up pretty early.”

He smiled, “Yep, but I have no idea why you’d be tired.” He teased.

She laughed, “You’re an evil man. You’re wearing me out.”

Pure happiness filled him when she rolled over on the bed then closed her eyes. He pulled a light blanket over her body then switched on the news channel. Soon could tell by her even breathing she was asleep. For several minutes he watched her wondering how this woman he’d known for such a short time had touched his heart so deeply.

Twenty minutes into her nap it happened. The nightmare, the same one that often tormented her sleep, struck.

Gerard turned to see her began to mumble then thrash in her sleep. Immediately he placed his hand on her shoulder to murmur comforting words but they didn’t help. He was shocked when she cried out in her sleep. “Let me go.”

“Lucy” He whispered gently. “It’s okay.”

Her eyes opened but he knew immediately the nightmare was still fresh in her mind. She blinked rapidly, for a moment feeling very disoriented.

“It’s okay.” He said softly. “You’re safe.”

“Oh” She sat up quickly.

Gerard was looking into her eyes, “You okay?”

The nightmare was fading. Taking a deep breath she forced herself to stand. “Yeah, I’m fine.” The pain was too intense, “Uh, I’m gonna go take another shower.” She needed to be alone.

Gerard was still shaken, “What happened?”

“Just a nightmare.” She whispered.

He had to know, “You said ‘let me go’. Lucy did someone hurt you?”

Her eyes were still wide with confusion. “No, I wanted them to let me go to…” Her mouth snapped shut. Without another word she ran to the bathroom.

When he heard the water running he quickly got dressed then headed down to the sofa machine. As he deposited the money he was suddenly struck by a thought. Since that first night with Lucy he hadn’t had a drink of alcohol, he hadn’t wanted one.

“Hell, I’m not even smoking that much.” He whispered to himself. Realization that spending time with her was changing him hit hard. She may not realize it but she was changing him, a change for the better.

When he returned with the sodas and ice she was just coming out of the bathroom wrapped only in a towel.

By now she’d gotten her emotions under control. “Sorry.” She smiled slightly.

He placed the cans and ice bucket down then crossed the room. “Hey, it’s okay but that must have been a brutal nightmare.”

It angered her that she found herself wanting to tell him. “No big deal.” She breezed past him. “Glad you got us something to drink.”

He was still debating wither or not he should push the issue when she turned.

“Please” She said softly, “Just let it go.”

Gerard could see in her eyes she was so fragile at this moment. “Okay, but if you ever want to tell me…”

She nodded, “Yeah” She grabbed the two plastic cups off the dresser, filled them with ice then opened a can of soda.

Gerard joined her at the table. “Do you want me to go out and get us some dinner?”

Lucy sighed, “Not really hungry unless you are.”

He smiled, “Nope not really.” He struggled for something to say. “Uh, wanna watch a movie, a real one?”

Realizing he was trying to put her at ease she smiled, “Sure.”

After the movie Lucy told him she thought it was time they headed back to the farm.

“Yeah, okay.” He said getting off the bed.

“Gerard, I’m sorry.”

He turned to look at her. “What?”

She wouldn’t meet his gaze. “I sorta ruined this.”

“No you didn’t.” he said shaking his head, “Not at all.”

Lucy couldn’t let it go, she’d seen the disappointment in his eyes. “You thought we’d…”

“Hey woman” He laughed, “I’m not even sure I could again.” He lied. “You wore me out.”

She was thankful for his answer.

On the drive back Lucy sat in the passenger seat staring out at the growing darkness. He was disappointed she chose to sit so far from him. The drive was mostly done in silence.
When he turned the truck into the driveway Rex happily greeted them.

“Hey, Rex.” Gerard laughed at the bouncing dog. “We brought you a treat.”

Lucy watched as Gerard gave the dog the leftover ribs.

“Uh, he does like them.” He said as the dog gobble down his treat.

“Yeah” Lucy smiled feeling much better now she was home. “Knew he would.”

The brutal heat of the day had finally lessened. “Wanna sit on the porch for a while?”

The truth was she just wanted to retreat to her bedroom but she was afraid she’d hurt his feelings again. “Sure, I’ll be out in a minute.”

By the time she came out of the house Gerard was sting on the glider with Rex at his feet.

“Here” She handed him a glass then sat down.

Gerard watched her take a drink, his glass slightly trembled in his hand.

Lucy was confused, “You don’t like whiskey?”

He was trying to fight the urge to take a sip. “It’s not that.” He said slowly. “Actually I like it too much.”

“Oh” She said softly as the realization of what he was saying hit her. “Shit I’m sorry.”

“Hey, you didn’t know.” He said placing the glass on the railing.

Immediately Lucy stood and before he could stop her she poured out the contents of both glasses out over the railing.

“You didn’t need to do that.”

She turned to look at him. “Truthfully I like it too much sometimes too. I’ll just go get us some water.”

Gerard rubbed his hand over his face as she walked back into the house. He was still fighting the feelings that had come over him when he’d smelled the alcohol. He’d wanted a drink in that moment, badly. However he’d forced himself to tell her the truth and that fact helped him feel a bit better.

“Here, a nice glass of ice water.”

He smiled as she sat back down. “Thanks”

“So...” She was struggling for something to say.

“It was a nice day.”

She grinned, “Yeah, really nice. Thanks for buying lunch and our nice cool place to eat it.”

He laughed, “Well it wasn’t always all that cool, matter of fact I’d say it was pretty damn hot.”

She felt her cheeks blush. “Yeah, that’s true.”

A comfortable silence fell between them. Gerard used his foot to gently push the glider back and forth.

“Lucy” He broke the silence hoping she wouldn’t be angry. “Do you have nightmares often?”

She sighed, “I don’t want to talk about it. But yeah, most every night. For a while I was drinking every night before I went to bed. It kept them away. Still I know that’s a bad habit to get into.”

He leaned back trying to relax. “It’s never good when alcohol becomes a means of escape.”

“Is that why you drink?”

Her simple question brought up so many memories he was trying to forget. “Yeah”

Lucy understood well not wanting to discuss certain things, she had so many of her own.

“So tomorrow.” He said slowly. “Think I’ll start writing.”

She smiled, “That’s good.”

“What are you going to do?”

“Well, I have a few rolls of film I need to develop. Think I’ll do that.”

“Cool, can’t wait to see the pictures.”

She was now feeling much more relaxed as she pulled her legs up on the glider. “Mostly the photos are of barns not far from here. Beautiful old barns that are being allowed to fall down.”

“Why?”

She sighed, “The property was bought by a big concern that simply wants to farm the land. So the houses and barns are left deserted.”

“That happen a lot?”

“Unfortunately, yes. A lot of small farmers have given up farming. It’s a hard life, trying to depend on crops to pay your bills.”

“Sorta like you do?”

She took a drink of water before answering. “Well yeah. I’m lucky that I don’t have a mortgage. My biggest costs are maintenance and taxes.”

“So you own your land?”

“This land actually belonged Rafe’s family. His mother died out in California, his parents were divorced and his dad died a few months before we moved here.”

Gerard almost dropped his glass. “Rafe?”

Lucy was confused by the sound of his voice. “Yes Rafe, my husband.”

He was so thankful it was dark and she couldn’t see his face clearly. In his heart he knew it was no conscience that they man he’d met in Boulder was named Rafe Marteniz. However his brain was still having trouble believing he was sure he’d met Lucy’s dead husband.

“Are you okay?”

“Sure” He said trying to recover quickly, “Just all of a sudden I’m really tired.”

“Me too.” She admitted as she slowly stood.

Gerard joined her at the door. After they both said goodnight to Rex they went in. At the top of the stairs Lucy nervously turned to him.

“Uh, well. Goodnight. See you in the morning.” Before he could respond she hurried down the hall to her bedroom.

Gerard sighed, it was pretty damn obvious she wanted him to know sleeping together was out of the question but honestly at his moment he was okay with that. Once he got to his bedroom he went in without turning on the light to take a seat on the bed.

“Oh shit.” He whispered in the darkness. He’d not only been brought here by Lucy’s dead grandmother but by her dead husband also. He struggled to remember his encounter with the cowboy at the bar in Boulder. In his mind he could see the man, hear his words.

“He didn’t want me making any bad decisions that would derail my trip.” Gerard said to himself. “He said he knew I was looking for answers.”

He fell back onto the bed. “He wanted me to come to her.” Gerard said softly. “He knew that’s where I was headed before I did.”

In her room Lucy too was having trouble falling asleep. Getting out of bed she slowly went to the closet. There she pulled out the old photo album needing to remember. The photo she turned to was taken not long after she and Rafe married. Lovingly she ran her finger over the photo gazing at the rugged smile on her husband’s face. “You promised to love me, to never leave me. We had so many dreams.” She closed her eyes a moment. “But those dreams died.” She whispered brokenly.

Turning the page another photo caught her eye. Pain tore through her body. “No” She cried closing the book. “Don’t do this to yourself.” She took the album back to the close then returned to the bed.

In her heart she understood why she’d wanted to see the photo of herself and Rafe. She feared she’d forget what he looked like, she feared she’d forget the love they had shared. “I’ll never forget.” She whispered switching off the light to plunge the room into darkness. Then another memory, a newer one filled her mind. The memory was that of Gerard gently kissing her injured wrists. “Damn it” She muttered. “No” Why after everything that had happened between them today was that what she remembered?

She rolled over punching her pillow determined not to think about Gerard. However as the minutes ticked by that proved very hard. “He’ll leave soon, it will be okay.” She tried to convince herself. She hated how sad that thought made her feel.

Gerard had just started to drift off to sleep when a very cool breeze made his eyes snap open. “Oh shit.” He whispered as a movement by the doorway caught his eye. He knew instinctively it wasn’t Lucy, it was a man.

“Gerard” The voice was low and smooth.

Sitting up Gerard stared in shock. “You. You were in that bar. You’re Lucy’s husband.”

The man smiled slightly. “Took you a while to figure that out, amigo.”

Gerard felt a shiver race down his spine. “But you’re…”

“Dead?” Rafe laughed “Yeah that’s true.”

“Holy fuck, I’m dreaming.”

The figure took a step closer to the bed. “You can convince yourself of that in the morning but for now you need to listen to me. She needs you.”

It was hard to make his brain work. “Lucy?”

Rafe smiled slowly, “Yeah, Lucy. I know you two have gotten closer.”

“Oh fuck.”

“Hey, I said I know. Believe me I haven’t been watching you two but I do know. My Lucy acts tough but she’s fragile. I know she’d trying to convince herself what’s been going on between you two don’t mean anything but she’s lying to herself. She’s got deep feelings for you or you’d never have touched her.”

“I don’t know what to do.” Gerard whispered.

“Well that is the dilemma.” Rafe said “One you need to figure out. Both of you are lookin’ for answers.”

Gerard shook his head slowly, “This ain’t real.” He closed his eyes a moment but when he opened them Rafe was standing right beside the bed.

“Amigo, listen.” His voice was urgent. “I ain’t got much time Rex is coming upstairs and he’ll start barking at me. You need to know you’ve got trouble heading your way. You’re running out of time. Lucy has made his house her prison, she’s refusing to let go of the past. Her broken heart…”

“Is killing her.” Gerard whispered.

Rafe smiled, “Yeah, you understand.”

“I care deeply for her.” Gerard admitted. “I want to help her.”

“I know you do. Knew you would. But like I said there’s a storm brewing and it’s headed your way.”

“What do I do?”

“She has to face the pain and the past before she can let go.” Rafe whispered. He turned towards the door. “Rex is almost here. Remember what I said.”

Gerard looked over at the doorway. Sure enough the Lab bounded into the room. When he turned back Rafe was gone. “Shit” He whispered slowly laying back down trying to come to terms with what had just happened. Beside the bed Rex sniffed at the air then settled down to lie at the bedside.