Gerard's pov*

Sleep never comes easily for me, and when it DOES come, it's always plagued with nightmares. I curled up under my blankets, hugging my knees to my chest, and tried to picture Mikey's face. I could SORT of remember his eyes, always bright and full of life, but their colour was lost to time. His nose was kinda like mine, I think, but I'm not sure. I wish they'd let me have a photograph of him, but all the ones we'd taken before mum and dad died, had been left behind, and obviously I couldn't ask for them.
I could remember his hair. It was soft and fluffy, and a lovely caramel colour. I remember stroking his hair to calm him down when he cried.. I just couldn't remember his face!
Tears soaking my pillow, I finally drifted off to sleep.. THAT was when the nightmares began.

I was walking to the kitchen, I could hear the screams, but I couldn't stop myself from heading straight toward them. I pushed open the door, and there, tied to the chairs, were my mum and dad.. But THIS time, there was a third chair, and on it, was Mikey!

GOD no!.. Not THIS one again!.. I tried to wake myself up.. It didn't work!

I stepped into the room, as a tall man.. IMPOSSIBLY tall.. Walked behind my father and slit his throat. I screamed. The man didn't hear me. I wanted to look away, but my eyes wouldn't obey.. Stupid eyes! Next he went behind my mother, and again, the knife flashed, and blood filled my vision.

PLEASE let me wake up now?.. I didn't.. And I knew what was coming next..

The man moved over to Mikey's side. Mikey was crying and screaming for me to save him, but I couldn't move. My feet felt heavy, glued to the floor. The man raised the knife towards Mikey's little throat. My brothers teary eyes met with mine. I screamed as loud as my lungs would allow. My whole body shaking with it.. Then..

I woke up!

I didn't know where I was for a moment. Someone was leaning over me. I panicked, lashing out! Flailing and screaming as I tried to get away. Hands were grabbing my arms, holding me down.. What new HELL is this?.. I screwed my eyes shut as I felt a major fucking panic attack start to take hold of me. The person holding my arms was saying my name.. I couldn't think straight.. I couldn't breathe "Gerard?.. Gerard please.. Come on.. It's just me!.." Who the FUCK'S me? ".. Please Gee?.." Wait.. Gee?.. No one except Maggie called me that since mum and dad, and it didn't SOUND like Maggie.. The voice was too deep! ".. Come on.. Open your eyes.." I tried to steady my breathing.. In for two.. Out for two.. In for two.. Out for two.. I slowly felt my heart rate calming ".. That's it Gee.. Breathe.. You're ok!.. Just breathe.." After what felt like forever, I felt like I'd relaxed enough to try opening my eyes again. Slowly I let them flutter open.. fear of what I'd see still gnawing at my insides. Sat on the edge of my bed, leaning over me and still gently holding my arms, was Frank!.. Oh yeah!.. THAT'S where I am! ".. Hi!.." He smiled, nervously ".. You ok?.." Swallowing heavily, I nodded, sniffing slightly ".. Nightmare?.." He let go of my arms.. I missed his touch. I nodded again, turning my wet eyes away ".. You're safe here.. No ones gonna hurt you.." Yeah, RIGHT! ".. Do you need anything?.. Water?.." I shook my head. I still couldn't bring myself to look in his eyes again. Frank sighed ".. Well at least we know your vocal cords still work.." I frowned, looking up at him in confusion. He chuckled slightly ".. You were screaming.. Probably woke the whole street.." Embarrassed, I looked away, feeling my wet cheeks burn ".. Not mum though.." He laughed ".. That woman could sleep through anything.." I wiped my eyes with the edge of my blanket ".. You ok if I try to get some more sleep now?.." I nodded, offering a small smile ".. Good!.. We got school in the morning.. Wanna be awake for THAT, right?.." He giggled.. FUCKING giggled!! I smiled ".. Ok!.. Good night Gee. Try to get some more sleep, ok?" I nodded as Frank stood up, then headed back over to his bed and climbed under the covers, turning over and was asleep and snoring within a minute.

Why did he bother?.. Probably just didn't want me keeping him awake, right?.. I'd been woken from my nightmares by foster siblings before, of course, but usually by them punching me in the guts, I'd never had one talk to me like that before.. It was new. I liked it!.. Of course it won't last.. He'll get sick of being woken up pretty quickly, then he'll be like all the rest.. I just KNOW it.

I'm not going back to sleep now, so I grab my phone and earbuds from my bedside, plug them in, and blast a bit of Black Veil Brides. Who knows what school will hold for me tomorrow.. All I know is.. it won't be good!...

Notes

Hi there chipmunks.. GeesCLUELESSgirl here..

Hope you're all well, and enjoying this fic as much as we are?!

Please comment, stay safe, and peace out babies!
<3