Broken but perfect

We walked into the coffee shop not to far from the house. I sat down and Frank went to order, the second I sat down, no one was paying attention to their own things. No, they were all staring at the nineteen year old guy with the messy red hair, cut up wrists, and stitched up red line on his neck. I looked down and my arm and picked at the scabs on my wrist, trying desperately to ignore the stares.

‘’Come on.’’Frank said

‘’What?’’ I said looking up from my arm

‘’We’re leaving.’’

‘’Okay.’’ I said standing up. As we walked towards the door, people continued to stare and I’m ninety-nine percent sure someone called me a freak.

‘’That was fucking horrible.’’ he said once we got a few feet from the coffee shop. ‘’I can’t believe people were acting like that.’’ he said angrily

‘’I’m fine, Frank.’’ That was a lie. It really bothered me but he was already worked up, I didn’t want to add to it.

‘’Well it Fucking bothered me, Gerard! They were staring at you like you were insane!’’
‘’I kind of am.’’ I said trying to remain calm, but the look on his face that was a mix of sadness and anger wasn’t helping ‘’I cut my fucking throat in attempt to kill myself! I did drugs and I had no fucking idea what was in them! I almost had sex with Misha fucking Collins again! So yeah, I’m probably a little insane, Frank!’’ I shouted, forgetting about the ‘staying calm’ thing.

‘’You-you almost had sex with Mi-Misha?’’ he stumbled on his words, and sadness fell over his face completely

‘’Yeah.’’ I said, hating myself for making him sad like that ‘’We were both drunk and high and I kissed him, which turned into making out with him. I almost did, but I didn’t have sex with him.’’

‘’Oh.’’ he said and his eyes fell to the ground

‘’Are you okay?’’ That was a fucking ridiculous question, of course he wasn’t. What the fuck was wrong with me?

‘’I don’t know. This isn’t exactly something you want to hear the guy you’re in love with say.’’ he said looking up. He looked like he was on the verge of crying.

‘’Frank.’’ I said stepping closer ‘’Trust me, it mean absolutely fucking nothing.’’ I said moving so I was less than a inch away from him. I grabbed his hands and he looked up to look me in the eyes.

‘’Gerard-’’ he began to say, but I cut him off by leaning in and kissing him. His lips were soft compared to my cracked ones. He didn’t seem to mind that my lips probably tasted of weed, vodka and scotch. He wrapped one hand around me and the other on my neck. The kiss went on for a while, but stopped abruptly because he accidently touched the cuts on my wrists that were bleeding from me picking at them.

‘’Fuck.’’ I cursed sharply, backing away

‘’Fuck Gerard I- are you okay?’’ he said with concern and care in his voice

‘’Yeah, I’m fine. Sorry, but I’m gonna go home. I’m really sore and tired.’’

‘’I’m sorry, Gerard. I didn’t mean too, I-’’

‘’Frank, stop. It’s not your fault, I’m just tired.’’

‘’Okay, bye Gerard.’’ he said and planted a kiss on my lips before walking away. Little did he know that at ‘’home’’ there was one Misha Collins wanting to have sex with me.

Notes