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Bulletproof Heart

Chapter 20 – Harvester Of Sorrow

Gerard POV

Mikey came back from the kitchen with a little smile on his face, announcing that Brendan would most likely be in the kitchen for awhile. Frankie suggested grabbing a few sodas and moving to the music room upstairs to hang out. Soon we were lounging comfortably, Mikes on Ray's shoulder and Frankie on mine.

"Well, shall we play a game?" It was Ray who asked this time. The rest of us shrugged our shoulders almost imperceptibly. After a minute Mikey agreed we should do something to liven the evening. It was then that he pulled out a large bottle of rum and started adding it to our red plastic cups of Pepsi.

"Let's at least start with something that doesn't require too much moving around, okay? I'm not up for any dares right now. Maybe Never have I ever?" Frankie asked all of us but she only looked at me. I just nodded because as soon as she placed her hand on my leg, I felt the sensation of my chest expanding and tightening at the same time. My entire body was suddenly on fire.

"Ok, the rules are simple. When it's your turn you tell us something you haven't done, for example: Never have I ever owned a dog. If any of you HAVE, you take a drink. I'm guessing you've probably all had one? I know Ray has." We all nodded then took one sip. "Now if nobody else had owned a dog either, I would have been the one to take the sip instead of all of you. Usually, the idea is that everyone gets drunk, but whoever has to take the least amount of shots/drinks or seems to act the least drunk wins. I don't think we should play it that way. Let's just get to know each other, relax and not spend all night puking or tomorrow hungover. Yeah?"

"Excellent idea." I finally found my brain, and voice, somehow. It was decided that Ray would go next.

"Never have I ever been to Disneyland." Frankie took a few sips, and then looked back and forth between my brother and I questioningly. I mostly answered her by shrugging my shoulders.

"Hey, it's far away and expensive. We've always had to, economize."

"That's understandable, I guess. I forget my childhood was not the every day experience. But, I missed things too. Things that I think others would consider ordinary." The sadness that washed over, then settled on that beautiful face, was something I wanted to remove. The desire wasn't sexual or physical at all. I was still attracted to her just as much as ever. But something inside me made me want to protect her from the harsh world. Maybe it was the rum. Maybe it was the fact that my heartbreak still was fresh. I could tell that her emotional side needed care and attention. After all, I could empathize with her about some of her problems – being used for various things and dumped, Linds pressuring me and cheating wasn't quite the same as her step father, but I knew what it was like to be hurt and humiliated. I felt a strong sense of responsibly to give her the care she wasn't receiving.

After that, the first couple of rounds of questions were light, funny, silly, and fun. But the more we drank, the more our confessions started to trickle out.

"Never have I ever kissed a member of the opposite sex." There was just a moment of silence. "Really? No one? Mikey, I would have thought...."

"Um, sorry. 4th grade Mandy Peterson. Oh, and Tina and Michelle Walker in 7th grade." He turned a bit red and looked down. I wouldn't have guessed my nerdy, little brother had kissed so many girls either.

"Huh. Any other guys?" My brother turned an even darker shade of embarrassed, and sunk further into the carpet.

"Ok. So, I guess that means you take a drink, right Ray?" I jumped in, much to Mikey's relief. Ray took a sip and dropped it. Frankie motioned for my brother to go ahead.

"Never have I ever gone without my glasses for an entire day." Everyone drank amidst some chuckling about him being about the blindest person they knew.

"Never have I ever earned an A on any of my report cards.” I paused, my head was starting to spin a little at that point. “Even with the World's Smartest Tutor." I laughed humorlessly, suddenly, I wished I'd picked something else. They all sipped while I tried to smile but I knew I wasn't fooling anybody. They all seemed to catch my melancholy direction, something I didn't intend and instantly regretted.

“Never have I ever had a single day where I don't think about how much I miss my dad. My best friend.”

“Never have I ever gone an entire school day without being beaten.....

Notes

Buckle up kids, because this ride is going to get bumpy fast. I'm not quite sure just how far I'm going to take it, but I'll probably put it to a vote. Stay tuned.

B

Comments

@Gee'sCLUELESSgirl!
Thx. I'll eventually have something up there!

Sharpest_Life_B Sharpest_Life_B
2/22/17

OMG...I saw your name on AO3 when you commented on one of my fics there and I thought "I recognise that name", but I looked there and you had no fics...I was confused!...NOW I'M NOT!

I'm looking forward to reading the rest of this, and seeing what you put up over there.
Welcome back, and I hope you and your family are well, or feel better soon.
xxx

Yeah. I rly am working on it.

Sharpest_Life_B Sharpest_Life_B
12/22/15

@Sharpest_Life_B
omg you re back!!!

emoqueen emoqueen
12/14/15

I'm working on the ending. I promise.

Sharpest_Life_B Sharpest_Life_B
12/10/15