Vision

Even after Gerard helped me calm down, I didn’t know what to do with myself. I couldn’t go out and face Brendon. I was terrified. When Gerard left the bathroom to get me yet another pair of new clothes I heard him talking to Brendon through the door.
“Look, Brendon I don’t want to do this but, dude, you nearly raped her. I can’t just let this go. Here, take this money; find a hotel for a few nights. You’ll be okay. You need to just leave her alone for now, I don’t know if she ever will forgive you completely, I don’t think I will either but if you want any chance of forgiveness, you will leave.”
I couldn’t hear anything after that. I’m assuming Brendon left when the door slammed. Gerard returned to the bathroom holding a pile of clothes that looked huge.
“Sorry if they are kind of big, the only thing we had left was Patrick’s old stuff. Unless you want to walk around naked, Patrick and I could join too if you like.”
“No thank you Gerard. If you guys don’t mind, can I shower before I get dressed?”
“Sure thing darling. I’ll get it set up for you, if you need anything just holler.”
I nodded and watched him walk out of the bathroom after teaching me how to use the shower and turning it on. Once he was gone I felt much more alone surrounded by marble and tile. The floor felt much colder under my bare feet.
Once the water felt warm enough I climbed into the shower. I tried to remain calm but the water against tile sounded like screaming and the foggy reflections in the mirror looked like faces. I felt like I was spinning and next thing I knew I was on the floor of the shower, the water streaming around me as I tried not to panic.
I cried for everything, for my fucked up life, for what Brendon did to me, for how I felt about Gerard, for how much Patrick helped me even though I didn’t deserve it. I cried and slammed my fists on the tile. I heard thunder rolling outside the hotel room, but wait, no, it wasn’t thunder, it was footsteps. Gerard burst into the bathroom with Patrick right on his heels. As he turned off the water and wrapped me in a towel I continued to sob and wouldn’t move from the corner of the shower. Gerard sat down next to me in the still wet shower, in his jeans and everything. Patrick stood over us looking around the room, trying no to stare. With every hush and pat on the back from Gerard I only cried harder.
I don’t know how long it had been but when I finally looked up I what I saw scared me to the point where I couldn’t move. Behind Patrick in the doorframe of the bathroom, stood Brendon.
I closed my eyes and screamed, only lifting my arm to point at where I saw him. Gerard wrapped his arms around me protectively.
“It’s okay, you’re okay, and no one is going to hurt you.”
“He’s there! I saw him!” I cried harder and harder, “I saw him.”
“Who, who did you see?”
“Brendon! I saw him! He’s here!” Gerard looked up at Patrick and nodded, Patrick left the bathroom and closed the door behind him.
“Sh, don’t worry, if he’s here, Patrick will find him, I’ll stay right here with you.”
When Patrick returned to the bathroom I was in a large robe Gerard had gotten me and Gerard was brushing my hair to calm me down.
“Anything?” Gerard whispered.
“Nothing, the door was locked and everything.” He looked down to me, “Are you sure you saw him.”
“I’m sure!” I screeched. “I can’t go out there, no way, he’ll find me!”
Gerard and Patrick exchanged glances before Gerard swallowed hard, sighed and looked back to me, “You can stay in my room okay? Or I’ll stay with you. You’ll be safe, I swear it.”
I wasn’t sure if I trusted that he could keep me safe from Brendon, but right now it was my only option.

Notes

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