What it means to live
Sorry for the mess it's just the chemo.
I sit still as the hook me up. The nurse hands me a bucket and leaves the room. It's a matter of minutes before I'm losing the contents of my stomach. There's light footsteps and a soothing hand placed on my back rubbing circles and when I lift my head I see Frank smiling gently.
"You're okay." He whispers softly.
"Don't look at me.." I whine before vomitting yet again. "It'll be me tomorrow. Don't worry." He replies as he pulls my deteriorating hair back. "You're okay." He whispers again. Handing me water and I drink slowly and lean into him closing my eyes. He places a hand on my head and combs through my hair soothingly. "Thanks" I whisper. "A lot"
"Anytime princess" he says his other hand playing with a ring in his lip. My eyes focusing on the various tattoos that litter his body. He's short. Almost as short as me but not quite. "When you're done with this murder machine how about we go hang out with a few of my friends. Get some lunch. My treat." I nod closing my eyes as another wave of nausea washes over me and I comit into the bucket.
Eventually the nurse comes and unhooks me and I push Frank out to get dressed. Black skinny jeans and a baggy t-shirt with 'I rock' on the front. I brush through my hair and look at myself in the mirror. I look tired and sick. I guess it's fitting I look this way though. Right? I mean it's truth. I gaze at my sorry excuse for hair again and grab an electric razor in the bathroom shaving the rest of watching it land in the sink and I smile. "Much better" I grab a beanie as I exit and see him waiting for me. He links his arm with mine. The nurse at the front chooses to look the other way as we exit and walk down the street to a local McDonalds and we go in sitting in the back awaiting his friends.
"You got rid of it?" He asks raising an eyebrow. "Yeah, it was stupid anyways."
I lay my head down on the cool table and close my eyes. Until I hear voices. Three boys arriving.
"Rosa I'd like to introduce you to Gerard, Mikey, and Ray." I look at them and nod placing my head back down again. They slide in around and start chatting away. Frank smiling and it makes my heart flutter.
"Lets do something reckless." The one called gerard says.
